Highlander’s Frozen Heart by Shona Thompson
Chapter Twenty-Five
Adelleine was lying on her bed, glaring at the ceiling. She couldn’t believe her own stupidity. She couldn’t believe that she had gotten into an argument with Magnus when he was so busy trying to protect the clan, and all because she thought that he didn’t want anyone to know about them, as though he was embarrassed about their relationship.
She berated herself, calling herself a fool. How could she have allowed herself to be a burden to Magnus like that? How could she be a distraction to him when he needed to be focused the most?
That night, Adelleine didn’t manage to sleep. She tossed and turned all night, but no matter what she did, she couldn’t shake the feeling that she was nothing but a burden, and that perhaps Magnus would be better off without her.
Perhaps he could find a noble woman, someone like himself, or perhaps he shouldn’t find anyone at all. All that Adelleine knew—or at least had convinced herself to believe—was that she was not the one for him.
Besides, she couldn’t bear knowing that Magnus wanted to keep their relationship a secret, even if his reasoning was that Fergus shouldn’t know quite yet. It hurt too much to hear such a thing, though she would have done the same had she been in his shoes.
The following morning, Adelleine avoided Magnus completely. She even found an excuse to leave when the man came to talk to Isla, where she and Adelleine were sitting with Fergus, as she couldn’t look at him in the eyes.
She knew that Isla would be curious about it, and she wasn’t mistaken. It didn’t take her long to find Adelleine after the incident, eyes narrowed with curiosity as she looked at her in a silent question.
“Whatever it is that you want to ask me, just ask me,” Adelleine told her, “I’ve had enough of hiding. Just ask me, Isla.”
“Alright . . . what is happenin’ between ye and me brother?” she asked, “Why did ye run straight out of that room? What did he do to ye?”
“Why do you assume that he was the one to do something?” Adelleine asked.
“Because nay matter how much I adore me brother, he is the one who usually does such things,” Isla said with a small shrug.
She seemed to be more patient with Adelleine’s silences than usual that day, and Adelleine wondered whether it had something to do with the fact that she felt sorry for her, for whatever she had decided Magnus had done to her.
“He didn’t do anything,” Adelleine said, though she wasn’t certain whether that was the truth. After all, he had been the one to treat her like a secret. “I just . . . I don’t know, Isla, I don’t think Magnus and I are meant to be.”
Isla gasped at that, as though Adelleine’s words had personally offended her. “What do ye mean yer nae meant to be?” she asked, her voice raised, “How can ye say that? Of course the two of ye are meant to be!”
Adelleine sighed, shaking her head at the other woman. “I am only a distraction to him right now. Perhaps . . . perhaps Magnus and I can discuss everything after the battle, but right now, I think it’s best to leave him alone. I don’t see how having a talk about it would do any good to either of us. All I do is take his mind off the battle.”
“So there is somethin’,” Isla said, “There is somethin’ that the two of ye need to discuss.”
Adelleine weighed her options. She could either tell Isla the truth and have her fuss over her and her relationship with Magnus, or she could simply lie to her, but she wasn’t certain whether it would work. Sometimes, a lie was enough to appease her, while other times, she could see right through it.
In the end, she decided to take the easier route, the one that would cause the fewest arguments.
“He doesn’t wish for anyone to know about us,” Adelleine confessed, “He says that it’s because of Fergus, because he doesn’t want him to know just yet, and I understand that, but I can’t even be around him, not right now. I can’t be around him when he treats me like nothing more than . . . than a paramour.”
Isla gave Adelleine a sympathetic look at that, wrapping an arm around her shoulders and pulling her closer. For the first time since Adelleine had met her, Isla seemed to be at a loss for words, and so she remained silent instead, simply holding Adelleine.
It was more than enough. It was the kind of comfort that Adelleine needed in that moment, even though she would have never guessed it herself.
“I dinnae have any advice to give ye about this,” Isla said in the end, as she pulled back from Adelleine, just enough for the two of them to look at each other, “I dinnae ken what ye should do. I can only tell ye to follow yer heart. I’d tell Magnus the same if he listened to me, but he rarely ever does.”
Adelleine couldn’t help but laugh at that. “I would have never thought that you’d say something like that,” she told Isla, shaking her head in an amused manner, “Follow my heart? That’s all that you have to say to me?”
“Och, why do I put up with ye?” Isla asked, shoving Adelleine playfully off her, “I try to give ye good advice, and all ye do is mock me. Fine, have it yer way then, lass. This is the last thing I will ever say about ye and Magnus.”
“Come now, Isla,” Adelleine said, “We both know that’s not true. Eventually, you won’t be able to control yourself, and you’ll say something.”
“Nay!” Isla insisted, “Perhaps I will take a vow of silence! Anythin’ it takes to nae talk about the two of ye anymore.”
“I’m rather certain that if you took a vow of silence, you would literally burst,” Adelleine teased her, “You would be so desperate to speak that you wouldn’t survive it!”
The look that Isla gave her was one full of venom, but to her credit, she didn’t reply at all. In fact, the two of them spent the rest of the day together, and Isla didn’t say a single word. It didn’t take long for Adelleine to figure out from where Fergus had gotten his stubbornness, and she made sure to inform Isla about it, but even then, she didn’t say a single word.
She only spoke again much later that day, when Adelleine least expected it.
“And I told Mrs. Blair that I don’t like porridge,” Adelleine said, as she finished her story about the previous day’s breakfast incident.
“Ye dinnae like parritch?” she exclaimed, and Adelleine was certain that the entire castle had heard her. She didn’t know whether she was ready to face the fury of dozens of other Scots, just because she didn’t eat porridge.
That didn’t matter to her, though, not as much as the fact that Isla had somehow managed to get Magnus out of Adelleine’s mind without saying a single word. Adelleine had spent the entire day trying to fill up the silence between them, and in the end, she had forgotten all about her misery and her problem with Magnus.
She had begun to suspect that Isla was a witch.
