Egotistically Yours by Hayley Faiman

Chapter Sixteen

BETHANIE

Laurent watchesme through the reflection in the mirror. He stands behind me, his body pressed against mine. I can feel his hard length against my lower back. One of his hands is wrapped around the front of my throat, the other slides from my hip to between my legs.

My hips jerk when he touches my sensitive clit. His gaze doesn’t shift from mine, he is focused on me, his attention nowhere else in the world but on me right now. I can’t look at myself in the mirror, not when all I can see are his eyes.

I let out a sigh, my hips moving and rolling against his touch, then he stops. I gasp, my hooded lids flying open wide and meeting his in the reflection. Parting my lips, I start to ask him what’s wrong, when he wrenches my hips backward and then I feel him at my entrance.

“Laurent,” I gasp.

His gaze stays connected to mine, his eyes don’t move as they watch me and he slowly sinks inside of me. This was not how I ever imagined our first time after officially getting together, but this is absolutely perfect.

This is Laurent Astor.

My head flies back when he’s completely rooted inside of me. He shifts his hand, one returns to the front of my throat, the other presses just against my lower stomach, his fingertips centimeters from my clit.

I want to move. I need to move. I shift backward slightly and I hear him grunt behind me, but he stays stock-still and the way that he’s holding me, I can’t really shift much myself. But I feel like I’m going to explode, like I’m going to expire immediately if I don’t move.

“You’re beautiful, Bethie. So goddamn beautiful.”

I don’t want to hear it, not right now, right now I just want to feel him moving inside of me. I’m so close, so fucking close, that I feel like I might actually die if I don’t come.

“Please,” I beg on a whimper.

He doesn’t speak right away, his gaze continuing to search mine in the reflection, then he grins. Laurent pulls back slightly before he buries himself inside of me again.

Gripping the edge of the vanity, I gnash my teeth together as I try to hold on to my sanity. I’m on the edge, so close to coming, my knees about to give out beneath me.

Laurent doesn’t stop, he starts to speed up, his hips moving behind me, his thrusts coming harder and harder with each stroke. Then his fingertips move down and I feel his touch against my clit.

It doesn’t take me long. One stroke, two, maybe three, and I’m lost to the sensation. My climax takes over, it rolls through me as slow as it does hard. Opening my mouth, I close my eyes and cry out, but no sound comes.

Then Laurent buries himself deep inside of me and I feel him come. His cock twitches inside of me, and I lift my head, opening my eyes to look at his reflection in the mirror. He’s standing behind me, his gaze on me, his lips parted and his eyelids lowered.

He looks as satisfied as I feel and I wonder in this moment if this is the rest of my life? I could get used to being loved by Laurent Astor, very used to it. I could crave it so easily.

Opening my mouth, I start to say something when I hear Tucker’s cry. Laurent grabs ahold of my hips, squeezing gently before he slips from inside of me. I turn to slip from around him and clean up before I grab Tucker when he wraps his arms around me.

Tilting my head back, I look up into his eyes. “I meant it, Bethie.”

“Meant it?” I ask, my mind wandering toward Tucker and worrying about him.

He nods his head once, lowering his chin as he brushes his lips across mine. “I love you,” he breathes. “Deep down, real fucking love, baby.”

“Laurent, I love you too.”

I do. I have loved him for far longer than he has me. Laurent is special, he always has been. He was a player, a playboy and even if it hurt to love him, I still did. I’m a glutton, I guess, a glutton for pain and punishment, but the man is far too easy to fall for.

“I need to clean up,” I mutter.

He chuckles, then I feel his fingers between my legs. My lips part as he slides his fingers inside of me, moving them a few times. My hips roll as I meet his gentle thrusts, then he lets out a moan.

“Fuck, that’s hot, baby. Go ahead and clean up, I’ll bring Tucker to you,” he says before touching his lips to mine, then taking a step back.

I watch as he turns and washes his hands in the bathroom sink, then he walks out of the bathroom. I stare at his retreating form for a few moments before my body jerks and I take care of business. I grab my sleep shorts and tank top before I settle in bed right as Laurent walks through the bedroom door with a whimpering Tucker.

“He needs Mama.”

I laugh, reaching for him and touch my lips to the top of his head, then I adjust myself and he latches on instantly.

Laurent settles beside me, his mouth touching the side of my neck, right below my earlobe. He hums against my skin, then sits back against the headboard with a sigh.

“We need to talk about my going back to work. I have one week left of maternity leave,” I announce.

He doesn’t say anything right away, but I can feel his eyes on me. He inhales a deep breath, letting it out with a sigh.

“I am not going to interfere with your decision or your choice. I just want to say that it’s completely up to you. Things are looking up at work, financially we can continue to live here or buy somewhere in the suburbs if you want and live comfortably on just my income.”

I don’t say anything right away, pressing my lips together, I roll them a few times. “I don’t know what the right decision is,” I admit.

We’re both quiet for a moment. I don’t know what the right choice is, but I also have my apartment that is sitting empty, that I am paying for as well. I can’t just imagine not working at all.

“We’ll never be married, Bethie. So, if you are waiting to get married so that you can be a stay-at-home mom…” His words trail off.

I know that he’s trying to reassure me that I can quit, that I don’t need the security of a wedding ring, but I feel as if this is all still way too brand new to completely give up my career. But on the other hand, I also don’t know if I can leave Tucker all day long, even just downstairs from my office, it’s still all day long.

Laurent reaches for me, touching my cheek with the back of his knuckles. Looking over to him, my eyes find his and he gives me a small smile.

“You don’t have to decide right this minute. And even if you go back and you hate it, you can quit. No decision that you make is permanent.”

His words ring in my head, and I wonder how much he truly feels that. Is that why he won’t get married? Because that would be too close to a permanent decision as someone can make?

Shaking the thought from my head, I know why he doesn’t want to marry, he’s told me. His past, his mother and his parents’ whole relationship. I don’t blame him, but that doesn’t mean that it takes away the yearning that I have to be married and have a complete family.

“Hand him to me, let me put him back in his crib,” Laurent rasps.

I feel dazed as I hand a now sleeping Tucker back over to him. I watch as he slips out of the room and puts Tucker to bed. Sliding down in the bed, I sigh when my head hits the pillow and I can’t help but wonder what exactly the future has in store for us.

I do know that it’s time for some serious decisions to be made. I need to come to terms with not having a marriage, but instead having a lasting partnership. What I need to do is find a semblance of trust when it comes to Laurent. Something that I don’t fully have with him yet.

LAURENT

Sex.

It isn’t the most important thing in the world, but it doesn’t hurt anything when it’s damn good, either. I was fulfilled when it came to having Bethie and Tucker in my home—in our home. Now that sex has been added back into the equation, I am beyond fulfilled. I’m finally, for the first time in my entire adult life, happy and settled.

Happiness.

I thought that happiness was something that was made up. Something people pretended, something they talked themselves into being, not something they actually were. I didn’t think happiness existed because it wasn’t something that I’d ever seen before.

My mind drifts back to Cody, my old college friend who is no doubt pretending at happiness with his wife while he does whatever satisfies his selfish heart behind her back. I was doomed to be him before.

Before Tucker.

Before Bethie.

Before I stepped up and realized what I wanted in life.

My family.

Before my father found his slice of happiness in Tennessee and the rest of the world be damned, he took what he wanted and they live true happiness as well.

As if thinking about Cody somehow manifests him, there’s a knock on my office door. I expect to see Zara standing on the other side, but it’s him.

“Cody?” I ask.

He chuckles, slipping into the room, closing the door behind him. “I hope you don’t mind me barging in, your secretary wasn’t out front, damn shame too, she’s a hot little piece.”

Ignoring his remark about Zara, I stand up and offer my hand. He sinks down in the chair across from me with a heavy sigh.

“How are things?” he asks.

“They’re good,” I say with a smile. “Baby is starting to sleep a little more, so that’s nice. My woman is getting ready to go back to work in a few days. Life is good.”

He arches a brow, clearing his throat and stares at me in silence for a moment. “She’s going back to work?” he asks.

I nod my head. “Yeah, I left it up to her. She is going to try it out, see how it goes. My father’s company has a company day care in-house, so she’ll be able to go and see him whenever she needs to.”

I’m not sure why I’m explaining my entire life and situation to him. We used to be friends, we’re more of acquaintances now, and he’s not really someone I would choose to spend a bunch of time with these days.

“Huh,” he grunts. “Well, I told the wife about your situation, new baby and all, and she insists on having a family grill out this weekend. You game?”

What I want to say is fuck no, but I don’t. As shitty as it sounds, I need Cody right now. My business needs him. I have other investors and things have started flowing, but he was the first and I owe him. So, if going to dinner with his wife and kids is what will make him happy, then I can do that.

“Let me ask Bethie what she’s got going on, just to make sure,” I say.

“Saturday afternoon, I’ll text you my address, see you there around three,” he says as he stands to his feet. “And if my wife asks, we’ve had several late-night meetings over the past couple of weeks.”

There it is.

That is the reason that he wants me to come to dinner, he needs me to provide him an alibi. The old me wouldn’t give a fuck. A year ago, I would have done it happily and probably high-fived him when I was done. Now, it makes me sick to think about it.

Absolutely fucking sick.

He leaves and I smile with a wave as I walk him out of the office and to the elevator car. I let out a sigh when the elevator doors close and I look over to Zara’s desk. She’s been in and out more recently, gone more than she’s here the past week or so. I don’t mind it really, she’s kept up on her work that I know of, she’s also here any time that I actually need her, but it’s just odd.

The elevator dings and the doors open. Looking over, I halfway expect it to be Cody back for something else, but instead it’s Zara who steps out of the car. She gives me a smile, but it’s trembling.

I don’t know what the fuck she’s always so scared of when it comes to me, but she’s practically trembling.

“I’m so sorry. I thought I would be back sooner. Did you need something?” she asks, her voice coming out in a rush.

Chuckling, I shake my head. “No, Cody was just here. He stopped by and I walked him out. That’s all. What were you up to?”

She looks down at her feet, then lifts her gaze to meet mine. “Nothing …” she says. Then her eyes widen. “A doctor’s appointment,” she blurts out as if it’s an afterthought.

“Okay. I have a few things that I need to do here, but then I’m going to be leaving a little early today.”

Zara nods her head, her eyes wide with what I can only guess is fear. I don’t know where she really was and I don’t care. As long as her work is done, she can do whatever the fuck she wants to, it doesn’t really matter much to me.

Leaving her standing there, I go back inside my office. Sitting down behind my desk, I pick up my phone to text Bethie about dinner on Saturday when I see that I have a new notification. It’s a picture from Bethie. Opening it, my whole heart melts right then and there.

There, staring back at me, is a picture of Tucker with a huge smile on his face. He looks so fucking happy. I can’t help but smile back at the image, wondering how on this earth I got to be so fucking lucky.

I don’t deserve him or Bethie, but I’m keeping them both not only because I love them but simply because they are mine.