More Than This by Dominique Wolf
CHAPTER 55:
Giovanni
T
here was nothing but darkness. Complete and utter darkness. I looked around and I couldn't make out anything in the distance. I reached out in front of me and I couldn't see my hands. It didn't matter where I looked, there was no light and I started to feel unsettled.
I didn't know where I was and it terrified me. I felt completely paralysed with no idea how to begin to find my way back. I tried to move but I couldn't - I was riddled with pain across my entire body. I wasn't even able to move and still, my body ached. Every inch of it ached and I couldn't understand where this pain was coming from.
Suddenly, I heard her voice in the distance.
She was close by, but I couldn't figure out where. I looked around again, trying to find her voice, but wherever I looked, there was nothing. Just the constant echo of her voice. I tried to focus on her words. She was speaking to me, but I couldn't piece together exactly what she was saying.
Come on, Giovanni.
The voice in my head was screaming at me to focus. I needed to focus on her voice. I took a deep breath in trying to get a handle on the rising anxiety in my chest.
Focus on Isabella. Focus on her voice.
“...I needed some time. I don't need any time, Giovanni.”
What was she talking about?
I could hear she was crying. It pained me to hear the clear sadness in her voice and I tried to call out for her. I repeated her name over and over again trying to tell her that I'm here and I can hear her, but the words never reached my mouth. I couldn't form the words. I couldn't even move.
“When Reyna told me you were in an accident,” she continued.
Accident? What was she talking about? When was I in a-
Oh wait.
The memories came flooding back to me. Sitting in the car, driving through the rain as I tried to dial her number and tell her what Dr. Gonzalez told me. I remembered the overwhelming happiness that washed over me as she confirmed I was not the father. I remembered the excitement of wanting to tell Isabella so we could get our lives back on track - together this time. I remember begging her to pick up the phone before I heard the shrieking tires against the road and then there was nothing.
Just darkness consumed me.
The same way it was consuming me now. Was I dead? Surely, there was no way that was true? I could hear Isabella's voice which must mean something. I tried to focus on what else I could hear around me. I started to focus on the constant beeping around me before I got distracted by the feeling of her hand in mine. I could feel her. The warmth of her hand spread across mine as she squeezed.
“I'm here, Isabella,” I tried to say. “I can hear you and I can feel you.”
But nothing came out. No movement. No words left my lips. I was so angry at myself.
Come on, Giovanni - get your shit together!
I repeated that over and over again, but there was nothing. I couldn't move or form the words I needed right now. There was nothing I could do right now to get her attention.
“So, I'm going to be here when you wake up. I'm going to be here tomorrow and every day after that.”
I couldn't believe what she was saying. She wanted to be with me again and I couldn't react. I couldn't comfort her. All I wanted to do was tell her how much I loved her and that I just wanted to be with her.
“I love you so much, Giovanni,” her sad voice murmured in the distance.
I love you, Isabella. I love you so much.
I kept screaming that, hoping that eventually the words would reach my lips and she would know. I needed her to know how much I loved her and that everything was going to be okay now. We were going to be okay. The more I shouted for her, the further away from me she started to become and then eventually, there was nothing but the darkness again.