The Lies That Shatter by A.V. Asher

Chapter Thirty-One

As Mercedes entered the speakeasy, she was overwhelmed by the tearful group of friends and colleagues that banded around her. Ezra brought her an amber-colored cocktail in a martini glass with a sugary cherry on the end of a pick.

Her eyes caught sight of Alec, making her pulse skip.

She could look at him all day. That delicious scruff she loved gave him a dangerous look. He wore a black suit jacket without a tie and his white collared shirt was unbuttoned just enough to expose the V of his neck. Memories of the moans he made when she’d run her tongue over that very spot flooded through her.

Alec’s gaze suddenly shifted, and his blue stare pierced into her. His beautiful lips turned up into a soft smile, and her core clenched. She blinked and looked away to cover the flush growing on her cheeks.

Ezra kept putting his arms around her and rubbing her shoulders. It wasn’t his touch she minded; it was that Alec could see it. She wasn’t sure why that mattered to her, but it did.

Mercedes knew what Ezra wanted from her. He’d made his intentions clear the night before. But Mercedes had enough of the pain of love to last a lifetime. She wasn’t willing to put herself in the way of it again. Once she was in New York, she would move quickly to get out of Ezra’s apartment.

An ash blonde head caught her eye and Mercedes wanted to throw her cocktail glass at it. Kristin was standing near the bar, gazing out at the gathered guests.

It didn’t matter. Mercedes only had to watch them together for one more night. Then she’d find a way to heal from this screwed up situation. It bothered her that she wouldn’t get to say a proper goodbye to Alec. That woman had latched on to him and she’d lost her chance.

“Such a great turnout, don’t you think?” Charlotte’s voice said in her ear.

Mercedes put her arm around her sister. “It is. You’ve done such an amazing thing here, Charlie. Thank you so much.”

Charlotte beamed at her, glowing with happiness. Luke brought Charlotte a water, his fingers delicately caressing Charlotte’s baby bump as he leaned in for a kiss.

Mercedes smiled at them with an ache in her heart. Her own life might be a level ten disaster, but her baby sister was living the fairy tale.

At least fairy tales still existed.

A headache was niggling behind her eyes, and she needed a break. She excused herself and went to the restroom. The ladies’ room had a small lounge area with a lighted vanity and a variety of hair products and lotions set out for guests to use.

Mercedes flopped onto the velvet-lined chair with a sigh.

God, this was a mess. The man she didn’t know she could ever trust again wanted another chance, and the man she longed for had chosen someone else.

Mercedes opened her purse and pulled out her makeup case.

“You’re making this harder for him than it needs to be,” a voice said from behind her. Mercedes looked up in the mirror to see Kristin’s tight face in the reflection. “Every time I leave his side, I find you trying to talk to him. Why can’t you leave us alone?”

Mercedes frowned. “Well, things are pretty hard all around. And I’ll talk to whomever I please. Alec’s a grown man, he can speak for himself. Especially to me.”

“We talk about you all the time. After we’ve left your sister’s house. When it’s just him and I.” Kristin smirked. An icy dagger stabbed through Mercedes’s heart. “He didn’t realize how shallow you were. And he isn’t sure he believes you didn’t remember signing that form. I don’t believe it either. I think you let him suffer and grieve like the self-absorbed bitch you are.”

Mercedes could beat this woman’s ass. It would feel really good. But the idea of the press reporting for weeks how Mercedes Elliott lost her mind and attacked Alec McKinley’s girlfriend was enough to center her.

Mercedes scoffed. “I know Alec well enough to know he’d never say anything of the sort.”

Kristin wasn’t done. She narrowed her eyes. “He has almost everything he’s ever wanted. I’m ready to give him what you’re too selfish to give him.”

Mercedes swirled the brush against the apple of her cheek. “Oh yeah, what’s that?”

“A family.” That stopped Mercedes, and she swallowed hard. “He loves children, and you and I both know you aren’t going to give him that.”

Mercedes loaded her brush with more powder, trying to ignore Kristin’s stinging words.

“Can’t you just let him go? Leave us be and let him be happy.”

Mercedes sighed and packed up her makeup. “See, the difference between you and me is that you want to tell him what makes him happy. I want him to choose for himself.” Mercedes swung her purse over her shoulder. “And if he was as happy with you as you seem to think he is, you and I wouldn’t be having this conversation.”

“You’re a trash person, you know that?” Kristin’s eyes flashed at her. “Nothing more than gutter trash, pretending to be sophisticated.”

“I don’t give a shit what you think of me.”

Kristin sneered. “It’s not just me. Alec thinks it too. We talk about it every night, after we . . . finish. And he tells me how relieved he is to be with me. And how he now can see how he dodged a bullet with you.”

The image of Alec and Kristin snuggled together after sex flashed through her mind. The shield she’d been wearing for days crumbled. Her stomach heaved, and she held the bile down.

“You know what Kristin? You can go fuck yourself.”

Mercedes caught sight of Charlotte before she strode from the bathroom. Mercedes dimly wondered how much of that her sister had heard. It didn’t matter now. She was done with this shit. She’d get the fuck away from this damn situation and get some clarity. Anything was better than being tortured with the images of Alec’s naked body with anyone else. And especially not that nasty bitch.

“Sadie, can I have a word.” Mercedes jumped at her name and spun. Alec had been waiting for her. He’d taken off his jacket and rolled up the sleeves of his white dress shirt. He looked even hotter than he had when he first arrived.

Kristin’s smug face crossed her mind, and she snapped. “Oh, now you want to talk? What is this, a goddamn tag team?”

Confusion crossed Alec’s face. “What?”

“I’m sure Kristin will fill you in after you ride her hard tonight. I’m so glad I can fuel your pillow talk.” Mercedes spun on her heel and stormed away, needing a moment to cool her temper.

His footsteps followed closely behind. “Stop. What the hell are you talking about?”

“Leave me alone, Alec.”

“No.” Alec grabbed her arm, pushed open the first door they came to and tugged her in. Mercedes didn’t resist, but it added to her rage that was reaching a fevered pitch. He led her down the narrow tunnel and stopped. “Where the hell are we?” Frustration coated his words.

“The tunnels under the bar.” Mercedes snapped.

“I know that. Where can we talk? I just want one goddamn word with you in private.”

Best to get this over with then.

“Fine. Come on.” She stalked down the tunnel to where it forked and went to the right. The door to the storeroom was tucked away in a narrow alcove. Mercedes pushed it open and flipped on the light switch. Edison bulbs hung from the ceiling, casting a dark yellow glow. Shelves lined the walls of the brick room, filled with bottles and casks. The scent of honey, damp oak, and old things permeated the space. She tossed her purse on a cask and closed the door behind them.

Mercedes flipped around to face Alec. “What do you need?”

He suddenly stumbled over his words. “I-I just . . .”

“You’ve barely said two words to me since you stormed out of my rental the first night. Why do you need to talk to me now?”

“I—” He ran his hand through his hair. “I wanted to make sure you’re okay.”

“Okay? No, I’m not okay, thanks for asking.” She put her hands on her hips. “Now, say what you really need to say.”

“It’s about Ezra.”

Mercedes tilted her head and narrowed her eyes. “What about him?”

“Are you back together with him?”

“I don’t see how that’s your business anymore.”

He moved toward her. “Sadie, please.” Torment was thick in his voice.

Mercedes stepped back. If she was going to keep her sanity, he had to keep his distance. “You made your choices, Alec. Now I’m making mine.”

Alec flinched. “I don’t want you to get hurt again.”

A laugh jumped from her throat. “Nothing could possibly hurt worse than this last week.”

“He cheated on you with your friend.”

“Oh, I remember. But he was a kid then. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but he’s all man now.”

Alec growled and closed the distance between them. Mercedes backed up against the wall. He stopped inches from her face. She was desperately trying not to be distracted by the scent of his body or the stubble that graced his perfect jaw.

“He’s all fucking wrong for you.”

Her mouth dropped open, and she stared at him. “I don’t think you’re in any position to give me relationship advice.”

“Maybe not, but you need to hear it, anyway.” His voice had lowered to a rumble.

“Then so do you.” Mercedes snapped. “You haven’t told Kristin jack shit about you. She doesn’t have a clue who the fuck you are. She looks at you and thinks you’re nothing more than a suit who can give her lots of babies. And what kind of person doesn’t ask questions about bullet wounds?”

“Sadie . . .”

“And she hates Cressida. Hates her. How can you be okay with that?”

“Sadie . . .”

Now that she’d started, Mercedes couldn’t stop. “I bet she complains about Cress or anyone else you dare to spend time with. Believe me when I tell you, that’s quite a red flag.”

“Oh, and Ezra hasn’t been a possessive arse?” Alec’s breath was coming in pants that brushed her cheek. “He keeps you on a short leash. Always fucking touching you.”

“So what? I know where I stand with him. Maybe I need someone to keep my bed from being so goddamn lonely at night.”

Alec’s eyes darkened. “Are you trying to hurt me?”

“Not at all. You wanted to talk about Ezra, so I’m talking.” She tilted her head. “Is hearing about me in bed with another man painful, Alec?”

“You know that it is,” he said gruffly.

“Then maybe you have even the slightest taste of what I’ve been living with since I found out that woman had taken my place.”

Alec threaded his fingers through her hair. “No one could ever take your place, Sadie.”

The warmth of his body pressing her against the wall was more than she could bear. Mercedes put her hand on his chest and tried to push him back.

Alec had other ideas.

He snatched up her wrist and pinned it against the wall, his mouth crashing onto hers. His kiss was rough and demanding, exactly how she needed it. Pure lust burned through her as Alec worked her with his tongue, coaxing her until she was whimpering and panting with every lash.

When he broke away, his eyes were dark with desire. Mercedes studied his face, hoping he wouldn’t hate himself for this later.

“We should stop,” she whispered, tugging to free her trapped hand.

Alec tightened his grip. “I don’t want to.” He took her mouth again. There was no fight in her to resist him. He was everything she needed, and she’d let him have anything he wanted.

His kisses trailed along her jaw and down the soft skin of her neck. She put her head back and groaned. He always knew exactly where to kiss her to make her slick as hell.

Reality nagged at her. One of them needed to have good sense. “Alec, you have a girlfriend.”

Alec drew back, his heated gaze scorching her with desire. “I ended it yesterday.”

Mercedes swallowed. “You did?”

“Aye. There’s only you, Sadie.” His words a husky murmur. “You’re all I see.”

The pain of the last week washed over her, reminding her what was at stake. She pushed it aside and kissed him again. Alec moaned into her mouth, dominating her. He released her trapped hand, only to run his fingers along the neckline of her dress. A shiver ran down her spine when he cupped her breast, his thumb circling the hardened bud.

“Christ, Sadie.” Alec tugged until the fabric moved aside, exposing her nipple to the humid air. Alec wasted no time. He leaned down and drew it into his mouth.

Mercedes cried out, arching her back, encouraging him for more.

He kissed and sucked on her until she wanted to explode. Then he pulled on the dress, exposing the other side. A fresh wave of lust raged through her as he gave the other nipple the same attention.

A moment of clarity kept invading her mind. Was she really going to let Alec screw her in the dusty storeroom of a speakeasy?

His tongue roved to the side of her nipple, and he sucked in. Mercedes gripped his shoulders and moaned. It was just enough pain to flood her senses. Alec was marking her, and she loved it.

Yeah, she was going to let him do whatever he wanted.

She didn’t have any condoms and briefly wondered if he did. They’d never needed them before.

Without warning, the reason they would need a condom now crashed into her.

They say they love you, then they fuck someone else.

Shit. Shit. Shit.

“Alec, stop.” Mercedes pushed on his shoulders. “Please stop.”

“Darling, what’s the matter.” Alec cupped her face in his large hands, his labored breath brushing against her cheek.

She was panting as she slipped her neckline back into place. Desire and panic were having a full-scale war inside her head and she knew she was about to be destroyed again.

Mercedes looked into his eyes and wanted to die.

Everything about him had shifted.

Alec, her Alec, was standing before her. Not the angry man who’d lashed out or the one who could barely look at her. But the tender lover who would rip the world apart for her.

But she couldn’t let him.

“I can’t, I’m so sorry. I’m not trying to lead you on, I didn’t expect this . . .” she stammered, the tightness in her throat closing her off.

“Hey, it’s okay,” Alec murmured, leaning in to kiss her. This time it was gentle, like a soothing caress. “It’s okay. We can slow down if you need to. There’s no rush.”

The ache in her heart ripped through her. “No Alec, I can’t do this at all. It’s too hard.”

Alec frowned. “I don’t understand.”

Mercedes inhaled deeply, steeling herself for the fallout that was sure to come. “Nothing’s changed. At least not for me.”

Pain shot across his face. “Sadie, I know I fucked up. I hurt you and let you think I didn’t want you anymore. That’s the furthest from the truth, my love. Please.” He lifted her chin with his finger. “Forgive me.”

“I do, Alec. But it’s too late.” She pushed farther out of his arms to give her the space to say what she needed to say. “I’m leaving for New York in the morning. The job’s all set, and all my things will arrive at the apartment in a few days.”

Anguish pulled Alec’s brows together. “Ezra’s apartment.”

Mercedes nodded. He backed away, running his hands through his hair.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered.

“Not good enough.” Alec shook his head. “I know you love me. Why won’t you try?”

“Alec, I . . .” Mercedes shook her head.

“I need to know.”

He deserved to know, but she wasn’t sure she could explain it in a way that made sense.

“Every time I think I’m safe loving someone, I let my guard down and then I get destroyed.” Mercedes’s voice was growing shrill as she tried to hold back the tears. “Every person I have ever loved has utterly broken me. And seeing you with her was the worst.”

“Tell me what I need to do, and I’ll do it.”

“There’s nothing either of us can do.” Daggers of pain were slicing through her. But it had to be this way. “We have to let each other go.”

“No. Jesus, Sadie, please don’t do this.” The depth of his pain reverberated in her bones.

Mercedes choked back a sob. “I’m sorry. But I can’t go through it again.”

She swept past him, grabbed her purse, and walked out of the room. Her mind so wrapped in misery that she barely remembered leaving the cold tunnels and entering the speakeasy.

Ezra saw her and frowned. He walked from the group of lawyers he was talking to and met her on the way to the bar. “Hey, where’d you go?”

Mercedes kept her gaze down to hide her red eyes and swollen lips. “I was heading to the bar. Can I get you a drink?”

“No, I’m good,” Ezra said. Mercedes knew that tone all too well. She was lying, and he didn’t believe her. She chanced a glance up at him. Ezra was tracking something from the direction she’d just come.

Mercedes turned to see Alec come out from the tunnel door. She could tell he was still shaken by their encounter, too.

Ezra watched Alec for a moment. When his gaze fell back on her, understanding written on his face. “Are you okay?”

Mercedes shook her head. “Not really.”

Ezra pursed his lips and nodded. “It’ll be alright. Go get your drink and step away from the crowd a little. I’ll make sure you’re covered.”

Mercedes smiled up at him. “Thanks.” She walked to the small side bar tucked in the corner.

The bartender walked over to her. “Hey, it’s the guest of honor. What can I get you?”

She glanced at the cocktail menu, not caring about the drink. “I’ll take a Sidecar, I guess.”

“You got it.”

Her fingers were shaking as she tried to tap out a soothing rhythm on the rich mahogany wood. Alec’s scent lingered on her skin, making her ache to run back to his arms. What she wouldn’t give to let herself go. To let him love her the way she needed.

It would be a massive mistake.

Tomorrow would change everything. She’d step off the plane into a new life. One that she would build for herself and her alone. It wasn’t the life she’d thought she was getting, but she hoped to God it would be enough.

Mercedes looked around the bar, needing a distraction from her turmoil. “Where’s Calvin tonight?” she called to the bartender. “I thought he would be here for sure.”

“He took a little time off this week before we knew about the party. I know he was bummed to miss it.” He slid a glass across the bar.

Mercedes put the thick crystal to her mouth and sipped. She hadn’t had a Sidecar in a while, and it was heavy with some sort of mixer. She took in another sip, needing something to calm her nerves. Fatigue was wrapping itself around her, and she just wanted to go to bed.

She sat back against the stool and the room turned ever so slightly. She laid her hand on the bar to steady herself. Her movements were unnatural, weighted.

The bartender was watching her as he poured another set of cocktails out. “You alright?”

His stare was piercing, as if he was waiting for her to do something.

“I’m great. I need to go find my ride.” She stepped off the stool, catching onto the bar before she toppled over in her heels. Her legs were heavy too.

“Oh hey, take it easy. Someone might have had a few too many.” He came around the bar and took her arm.

Mercedes frowned at him, her pulse racing. He was so close to her. How did he get there so fast?

What the hell?

She cut through the brain fog to realize he was walking her somewhere. To one of the tunnel doors. His fingers digging into her arm.

No, no, no.

This was all wrong. Something was all wrong, but she couldn’t focus. It was just like her nightmares. Her body was filled with lead, and she couldn’t scream.

Alec.

She scanned the remaining guests.

Where the hell was he?

Mercedes spotted him across the room. He was facing her, but his eyes were on someone else. His features were taut and angry.

She jerked her arm away trying to maneuver out of the man’s grasp. She needed just a second to catch his attention.

Alec glanced up and he did a double take. His eyes narrowed when she stumbled.

“Help me,” Mercedes mouthed, hoping he would understand her plea.

He did.

Alec sprinted at them, leaping over chairs. Mercedes’s foggy mind tried to make sense of everything, but it was all jumbled.

The only thing she could understand in all the sudden chaos was the word. “Fuck,” from the man next to her.

Just before Alec got to her, a stabbing pain jammed into her side.

It was then that Mercedes knew death had found her again.