Hotshot and Hospitality by Nora Everly

Chapter 22

Molly

“That was intense, and I swear to god right now, I am never doing that,” I announced once Sabrina had left the room. The sight of her bent over and screaming would be singed on my retinas and haunting my dreams, probably for the rest of eternity. I’d seen people on TV shows have babies and it looked like a little bit of fancy breathing, a few screams and boom, baby time. Sabrina’s stomach was moving around like right before that little alien dude popped out in the movie. I’d only known Sabrina for a few months, and she was as cute and pure as Snow White, so the F-bomb shooting out of her mouth was some serious shit.

“You mean, you’re not really pregnant?” Everett teased, his eyes laughing at me over his glass of iced sweet tea.

Crap, I’d just outed one of the secrets myself by accident. “No. I’m sorry, y’all, but I’m not pregnant.” I held my hand up. “I’m not engaged to Garrett either. We’ve only been, uh, hanging out, becoming friends again—I don’t even know how to describe it—since Genie’s the other night. Sadie and I got the ring back from Lacy at the Piggly Wiggly before we got here. Sadie slipped it on my finger for safe keeping and now it won’t come off.” That felt good. I was no longer drowning in secrets. Part of the truth was out, and I felt like I could finally see the surface through the lake of bullshit I’d been swimming in lately. I decided to keep the un-dating thing to myself for now; that was nobody’s business but mine and Garrett’s.

“You’re fine, honey,” Bill said with a chuckle in his voice. “I told Becky Lee that Jackie wasn’t being honest with her. She’s just stuck in wishful thinking is all. This was a big day for her already without Sabrina going into labor. You know how she gets about parties and babies.” Becky Lee felt the same way about parties and babies as I felt about kitty cats and pie. In other words, we got squealy, lost all control, and our sense of reason went out the window.

“Yeah, I know how she gets. But I’m still worried about letting her down.”

“I love you like one of my own, Molly. And Becky Lee does too. Quit that worrying and smile, girl! We’re about to gain another family member. I’m about to be a grandpa times five today.”

“Exactly what Dad said,” Everett added. “You don’t need to worry. We already know the truth. Plus, Garrett would not give Aunt Jade’s ring to you, not after he already gave it to Lacy. I still can’t believe he did that in the first place. We all told him not to do it.”

“He was just lonely, Everett. And she’s a sweet girl but they didn’t suit each other.” Bill agreed. “Not like he does with you, Molly.” Holy crap, he thought I was well suited to Garrett. I was equal parts elated and scared to receive Bill’s approval. Clara grabbed my hand and squeezed, which was our unspoken way to say, “Woo hoo!” It was also our unspoken way to say, “Holy shit” and “What the fuck?” so I wasn’t one hundred percent sure how she felt, but her smile led me to conclude it was one of the good ones.

Barrett popped his head in the door. “I’m going to head to the Bandit Lake site and shut it down for the day. Sadie, I can drop you off at home when I’m done if you like. One of us can return your van tonight. Molly, Garrett is driving them to the hospital. He said he’ll text you later.”

“Okay, thanks.”

Sadie got up to leave with him. “Thanks, Barrett. I’ll come with you. Bye, y’all.”

“I’m gonna take off too. I’m helping my mother at the farm stand today.” Clara hugged my neck goodbye and smacked a kiss on my cheek. “It’ll all be okay, promise,” she whispered in my right ear before she took off.

Everett also stood up to leave. “I’ve got to get back to the shop and close it for the day. I’ll catch y’all later at the hospital.”

“I guess it’s just you and me, kid.” Bill laughed as he started stacking plates to clear the table.

“I’ll help you. I’m not in the mood to work anymore and Landon has it covered at the inn.” I grabbed an armful of glasses to carry to the kitchen.

“You know, Becky Lee was scared to give birth the first time too, Molly. Don’t let fear hold you back if you want to be a mother someday. You can do anything you put your mind to. And if it’s Garrett you’re worried about, he’ll make a great daddy if it comes to that.”

“I know, you’re right. It just looked so painful.” I ignored the Garrett-as-the-dad part of his statement. It was better that way.

“They have better drugs nowadays than when the boys were born. Maybe it’s like Sadie says and you don’t have to feel much of it,” he mused.

“I just wish . . .” I sat down hard, setting the glasses I carried on the table with a clatter.

His eyes softened as he sat across from me. “You’re missing your daddy right now, aren’t you?”

I inhaled a huge breath and marveled at how Bill Monroe had always managed to know how I felt.

“And you miss your momma too.” He sighed as he remembered my mother. “She got so lost after he died. It broke her, and she never came out of it. Lane would have been a wonderful grandpa to your babies. He loved you and your brothers so much—with all his heart. To the moon and the stars and right back home again, remember? He always said you were his special little treasure, his reward after having all those wild brothers of yours. We’ll never get over his loss, Molly. He was my best friend in the world. I just—I see you still hurting, and I don’t like the thought of you being lost in grief like your momma. I know it’s not the same as having him, not by any means, but I’m here for you, Becky Lee is here, and the boys are too. You and your brothers are family. You’re honorary Monroes, and you always will be.”

I blinked back tears. “I do miss him. Thinking about him hurts and I never let myself remember him because whenever I do, my heart breaks all over again. It’s almost worse than the day he died, because the shock of it is gone and all that’s left to feel is the absence.”

“I know, honey. Like I always say, sometimes memories are the worst form of torture, even the good ones. And it’s funny how stuff like this always stirs them up, isn’t it? The little, random things that make you miss a person always come at you like a surprise. But the big life stuff, babies being born, holidays, weddings”—he looked at me pointedly—“or discovering you could possibly love someone and then letting yourself take that fall . . . those kinds of things will always make you wish the person you’re missing was here to see it with you. You’ll always have a taste of bitter with your sweet, Molly, but that doesn’t mean you should stop living. Lane would want you to live the life he’d always dreamed for you—full of happiness and love.”

“I know he would. And my mother does too, in her way,” I whispered. “How do I stop being afraid?”

“I wish I knew what to tell you. Fake it until you make it, then maybe one day you’ll be so happy you can look back and realize the fear is gone.”

“Yeah . . .” I murmured.

“I’m gonna take these plates to the kitchen and get some of Becky Lee’s lemonade. Would you like a glass?”

“I would love a glass, and I’ll be right behind you with the rest of the dishes.”

I found Becky Lee’s covered cake plate in the buffet and set Sabrina’s gorgeous cake inside, covering it with a smile on my face and allowing myself to dream of the day I’d have a cake like this of my own.

Fake it until you make it.

I’d spent my entire life faking one thing or another. Why couldn’t I fake this? Could I pretend to be brave and date Garrett for real, no more un-dating or hiding from him how I felt? He deserved to be with someone who could show him how wonderful he was out in the open, the way falling in love should be.

Was I falling in love with him?

Was I brave enough to admit my feelings, even if it started as a secret I only told to myself?

I decided I could. I decided I deserved to be happy just like anyone else. But as for falling in love? It was too early to tell; I’d never let myself come close to it before.

Bill stepped out of the kitchen with a huge smile on his face. “Becky Lee just called. Sabrina had the baby in the hospital parking lot. They’re getting them into a room right now. Let’s go.”

“Oh, uh, I don’t know if I should. I only met Sabrina a few months ago. We’re friends, but not the going-to-the-hospital-on-the-day-you-give-birth-in-a-parking-lot-for-a-visit kind of friends. At least, not yet.” We’d get there eventually though, because Sabrina was good people. Maybe she would visit me in the hospital when I had Garrett’s baby someday.

Imagining having a baby with Garrett felt scary, but I enjoyed thinking about it all the same. Hopefully, whenever I gave birth, I would be sufficiently loaded up on the good drugs in a nice comfy hospital bed with Garrett feeding me ice chips and at my beck and call. He seemed the type to be a beck-and-call father-to-be and I was one hundred percent sure I would be a pain-in-the-ass pregnant woman. Honestly, I was a handful with just a head cold.

Bill laughed. “I’ll show you the baby through the window of the door . . .” He was trying to cajole me with a cute baby for some reason, and it was almost working. I mean, if she’d had kittens, I’d be in the car already. Cute things were irresistible to me. “Okay,” he said, and it sounded like confession time. “I have to be honest with you. I can’t do this stuff, this tricky kind of sneaky stuff. Becky Lee told me to bring you with me so she can get you to drive Garrett home. She’s matchmaking again.”

I burst out laughing. “I’ll go with you. I don’t want you to get in trouble with Becky Lee.” Plus, Garrett and I had plans for later tonight that Bill did not need to know about.