No Escape by Julie Moffett

 

Chapter Twenty-Two

 

Lexi Carmichael

 

I collided hard with Slash, who had one hand on the doorknob, presumably to pull the door closed. The momentum of my body accelerating into his propelled us both into the hallway with surprising force. Slash, who’d clearly been unprepared for my full-on tackle, stumbled a few steps before wrapping his arms around me and going down on his butt, me landing on top of him, writhing and hyperventilating.

Slash wrapped his arms around me, trying to calm me. “You’re safe. Calm down.”

“It’s on me. My shoulder. Can you see it? Is it still on me?” I shoved my shoulder into his face.

“No. There’s nothing on your shoulder. In fact, I don’t see anything…” He paused for a long moment. “…except for our parents.”

I immediately stilled and then looked up. Sure enough, both my parents and my parents-in-law stood in the hallway in front of their respective rooms, looking at us with wide eyes. Slash immediately rolled us over, trying to shield me with his body.

Thank God he still had his boxers on.

My mom looked shocked beyond words, and my dad seemed posed to fight Slash if it came to it. I couldn’t even glance at my in-laws. My face burned hot with embarrassment.

“Well, this is totally awkward,” I finally said.

“What happened?” Oscar asked. “Why are you both lying starkers in the hallway?”

“Oscar!” Juliette scolded him. “Mind your own business.”

“He asked a legitimate question,” my dad said, crossing his arms against his chest. “Why are you lying in the hall in a serious state of undress? And why did you scream? Is he hurting you?” He glared at Slash.

“Hey,” Oscar said, stepping forward to defend his stepson’s honor. “Romeo would never hit a woman.”

“What? I exclaimed in horror, peering over Slash’s shoulder. “No, Dad, no. Slash isn’t hurting me at all. You’ve got it all wrong.”

Thankfully, at that moment, my mom, social hostess of the year, broke the tension. “Gentlemen, take the testosterone down a notch. Can’t you see Slash is trying to protect her honor?” She knelt beside me and Slash. “What happened, honey? A spider? You’re white as a sheet. Let me take a look.”

She unwrapped a silk scarf from her neck and draped it over Slash’s shoulder. Then, before I could say anything, she reached between Slash and me, groping around for a nonexistent spider bite on my body.

OMG.

I wanted to die of sheer mortification. I was lying mostly naked beneath Slash in front of my in-laws, whom I’d just met. And poor Slash. I’m certain he never wanted to be this close to his mother-in-law with her hand blindly fumbling God knew where between our bodies.

“Mom,” I managed to get out. “No spiders. I’m okay.”

Slash tried to keep stoic and silent even as my mom pulled her hand out from between us, retrieving her scarf and straightening. “If you’re sure you’re okay, honey, we’ll leave you two alone to do…whatever it is you’re doing. Come on, Winston. Stop glaring at Slash, because clearly this isn’t his fault.”

They went back into their room, my mom pulling Dad with her. He looked reluctant to leave. I couldn’t imagine what their conversation would be after seeing us like this.

Unfortunately, instead of leaving like my parents had, Oscar peered down at us. “I didn’t scare you that badly, did I, Lexi? Are you sure you’re okay?”

OMG. How was that even a question? Obviously, I was not okay. Not now, not in any universe, not ever. I might even have to consider moving to the moon on the next commercial flight. I honestly didn’t think there was anything I could say in such a situation even if I googled it for the next six years.

Still, I hoped I hadn’t given Oscar the impression I hadn’t enjoyed his company, because I had. Just not the part where he’d decided to become Bee Man. However, to admit now that I was scared to death of bees after braving a viewing of a hive, and pretending I wasn’t, would expose me as fake.

What in the world had I been thinking? I should have been honest from the start about my fear of bees. I was a complete idiot. How much worse could I screw this situation up?

I drew in a deep breath. “Oscar, I… I thought I saw a—”

“Scorpion,” Slash smoothly interjected. “She thought there was a scorpion in our bed and ran out of the room. I tried to catch her, but my feet got tangled and we ended up here.”

I just stared at him. It was one of the nicest things he’d ever done for me, even though I couldn’t ever imagine Slash getting his feet tangled up. Still, I almost dropped my hands from my boobs to kiss him.

“Come on, Oscar,” Juliette said gently, tugging on her husband’s arm, clearly embarrassed for us. “Leave the children alone. They’re fine.”

Oscar didn’t respond, but he did give me one last worried glance over his shoulder.

As soon as their door closed, Slash got to his feet, hauling me up and into our room. He shut the door firmly and leaned back against it.

“Where exactly did you and Oscar go after lunch?” he asked.

I sighed and snatched a folded blanket from the foot of the bed, wrapping myself in it. I wasn’t going to have this conversation while dressed only in my undies. “Last night at dinner, Oscar told me about his hobby tending beehives. Since I was following guideline number three on my spreadsheet—learning the hobbies and interests of your in-laws—I asked him several questions. As a result of that, Oscar may have perceived that I’m genuinely interested in bees, which, in fact, is true, but only in a theoretical sense.”

Slash crossed his arms against his chest. “Go on.”

“Well, today at lunch, Oscar said he’d noticed an apiary on the castle grounds after we’d completed the maze challenge. He invited me to check it out, and since I couldn’t think of a good reason to decline, I said…yes.”

“Although you’re terrified of bees.”

“Yes, Slash, although I’m terrified of bees.” I glared at him. Had he heard nothing I’d told him about the spreadsheet and the important guidelines? “I was trying to follow guideline number one: Accept an invitation to do something with your in-laws even if it’s out of your comfort zone. Obviously, that was way out of my comfort zone. But I really like Oscar, and I wanted to show my eagerness to integrate into your family.”

“And by doing so, you violated rule number four: Be yourself.”

I sat down on the bed, dejected. “I know. But I didn’t expect him to cover himself in bees. I thought the bees were killing him, so that’s why I brained him with a branch.”

“You…hit Oscar?”

“That wasn’t exactly the plan, but I wanted to get the bees off. I dropped the branch by accident, whacking him in the head. At least it worked, because the cloud of bees rose off him as soon as I hit him. But then he was on the ground and bleeding, and I thought they were coming after me, so I ran.”

“You hit Oscar and ran?”

“Ran screaming, to be exact,” I amended. “I thought I should go get help.” I stopped and stared at him for a moment. “Are you going to repeat everything I say and make it into a question?”

“Maybe?” He stared at me as if afraid to know where the story might go next. I figured it was better to just tell him everything at once.

“The funny thing is, Oscar may or may not know it was me who clocked him with the branch. I’m leaning toward may not, and I’m fine keeping it that way for now. Anyway, as I was running away, he shouted and told me to stop, and that he was fine. I cautiously returned, and other than some apparent stings on his neck and hands, he was alive…although bleeding behind the ear. It’s a miracle he only got stung a few times. He was completely swarmed with bees. They were on his face, head, arms. Everywhere.” I shuddered just remembering it. “I thought he was going to die right in front of me.”

“He’s an experienced apiarist.” Slash sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. “You should have told him the truth—that you’re terrified of bees, spiders, and a wide variety of insects.”

I felt worse than ever. “I know. This whole in-law thing is way more complicated than I expected, even though I studied really hard and prepared a spreadsheet. Now I’ve ruined everything.”

He walked over to the bed and sat down, putting an arm around me. “You haven’t ruined anything. This is my fault, too. I should have mentioned Oscar tended a small apiary. It completely slipped my mind. But you’re overthinking this. My family loves you because I love you. You make me happy, and in turn, that makes them happy. You don’t have to say or do anything to be part of our family, cara. You already belong just by being you.”

He took my hand, running his thumb over the scar on my wrist, identical to the one he had on his. “We’re in this together for the rest of our lives, remember? Just be yourself, have fun, and relax a bit around my family, okay? Trust me, they will love you for who you are, not for who you think they want you to be.”

I sighed again, leaning against him. “You make it sound so easy.”

“It’s not. Exhibit A—your dad’s and my relationship. But it doesn’t mean we stop working on it.” He reached up to touch my hair, then stood, heading for the balcony. He opened one of the balcony doors, letting the cool air in and causing the curtains to billow.

I pulled the blanket tighter around my shoulders. “Why did you open the door? It’s windy out there and I’m mostly naked, remember?”

“Oh, I assure you, I remember you’re mostly naked.”

“Then what are you doing? We have to get ready for the next challenge.”

“I know, but I had to set the bee free first.”

“Bee?” I leaped to my feet in alarm. “What bee?”

“The one that was tangled in your hair.” Slash closed the balcony door and turned to grin at me. “But no worries, he’s safe and you’re all clear now. No more bees. But I was hoping you’d join me for a little search among the sheets for that missing scorpion. After all, we do have a bit of time before the next challenge, and we need to release some tension. Plus, we wouldn’t want that poor scorpion waiting all that time for us.”

I tilted my head at him, narrowing my eyes. “You just made that up about the scorpion, right?”

He gave me an innocent look. Sitting on the bed, he patted the spot beside him. “Why don’t we take a closer look beneath the sheets and find out?”

I studied him. “You have a serious bad boy vibe going on right now.”

“I’m astonished you know what a bad boy vibe is.”

“Says the man who dressed in black and bypassed my apartment alarm to sneak in and watch me sleep the first time we met. Oh, I know what a bad boy vibe is.”

His mouth curved into a grin. “So, this bad boy vibe…are you insinuating I’d disable my firewall for you?”

“Would you?”

“For you, I would. Now, come over here and kiss the bad boy who’s willing to lower his firewall for favors from his wife.”

I dropped the blanket and crawled toward him on the bed. My hair brushed against his chest, the muscles tensing under my fingertips as I splayed them against his skin. “Okay, but if a scorpion stings my butt, you’ll owe me the newest, most expensive insular gaming headset on the market.”

“Fair enough,” he said, knotting a hand in my hair and pulling my mouth toward his. “But in the spirit of full disclosure, I’m absolutely getting the better deal.”