My Ten-Year Crush by Olivia Spring
Chapter Four
Pizza. Oh how I love thee.
I sank my teeth into a large slice topped with pepperoni and extra cheese and it tasted like heaven.
Tonight I’d decided to treat myself to a takeaway and a bottle of wine to celebrate the end of term. I’d been good throughout the week, cooking healthy dinners from scratch and bringing the leftovers to work for lunch, and I’d even had a chicken salad last night when I’d gone out for dinner with a few colleagues, so I deserved this.
An evening at home with a good feed and a couple of DVDs would also help take my mind off the ‘R’ word, which had started an hour ago.
Melody had been messaging all week about the reunion. Pleading with me to come, but I’d stuck to my guns. The more I’d thought about it, the more anxious it made me.
It wasn’t just the stuff about seeing Mike, which might be awkward. The idea of seeing everyone also made me shudder, because it meant I’d have to face up to the reality that I wasn’t happy with my life.
I’d thought that by now, I’d have everything together. I’d have a great job and be married with a child. Or at least be thinking about having one soon. But I wasn’t even close. I was failing in every aspect. So the last thing I needed was to go to some stupid reunion and be reminded about how much I’d fallen short of my expectations, hopes and dreams.
I bet loads of my old friends had done lots of cool things. They were probably racing up the career ladder, travelling to exciting places, raising an adorable family or doing fun stuff. And then there’d be little old me. Boring Bella who was still stuck in the same job, with zero relationship prospects or romance on the horizon.
No, thanks. I felt bad about myself already. I didn’t need to go to the reunion to feel even worse.
My phone pinged. It was another text from Melody.
Melody
Music is ace! About to have a boogie on the dance floor. Wish you were here! xoxo
That was the fourth text she’d sent this evening. The first one had said:
Melody
I’ve arrived! Place looks fab! Lots of decorations and pics from the good old days. Spotted a few of you! The spread seems pretty good, so I’m going to get stuck in. Will keep you updated! xoxo
That had been swiftly followed half an hour later by:
Melody
Great turnout! Loads of people already here. Miss you! xoxo
The third text had come twenty minutes later:
Melody
Just seen little Hayley! Can you believe she’s got five kids now? FIVE?!! I’m struggling with one. She was always so prim. I thought she’d end up joining a convent and now I discover she’s had sex at least five times! Just shows how much things can change in a decade. I’ve heard Duncan’s here. Gonna find out if he ever became a playwright like he always boasted he would. I’ll keep you posted!! xoxo
It was as if Melody had been appointed the unofficial roving reunion reporter. I hadn’t asked for these updates, but she insisted on sending them. Okay, I admit, I was kind of interested to know what was happening. And I was just as shocked as she was to hear about Hayley. She’d always said sex was the root of all evil. Pretty sure she’d also said there was no need for procreation, seeing as the world was already overpopulated. Hmmm…
Still, at least she had her own family, so she was way ahead of me.
My phone pinged again. If Melody kept up this level of texting, I wouldn’t need the film to entertain me.
Melody
OMG. OMG. OMG. Haven’t found Duncan yet, but I can confirm that Mike Jones is in the building. I repeat: MIKE JONES IS IN THE BUILDING.
Melody
Holy mother of God, he is H-O-T. Not just Nando’s chicken hot. I’m talking extra spicy with chilli sauce and a side order of one thousand jalapenos HOTTTTTTT!
My heart stopped for a second as I tried to take it all in.
He was there.
He was really there.
If I wanted to, I could see him again.
For the first time in ten years.
No.
It’s a bad idea.
If I went, it would be awkward. He’d ask why I hadn’t kept in contact and then I’d have to explain that it was because I’d liked him so much back then that it was the only way I could move on with my life. Even though of course I didn’t feel that way anymore, just saying that out loud would sound so cringey.
So Melody reckons he’s still hot…
As I pictured his face, my heart restarted with a vengeance and pounded through my chest.
I supposed it made sense that he’d aged well. Mike had always taken care of himself. Playing basketball or working out in some form or another. Most students cured their hangovers with a full English breakfast or a Bloody Mary. Not Mike. He’d get up and go running.
I remembered one evening when I was feeling down about my ex breaking up with me, Mike had invited me to the gym because he’d said exercise would take my mind off things. But after being there for all of half an hour, I’d said I needed to leave.
He’d thought it was because I was chickening out, but in truth it was because I’d hated the illicit thoughts going through my head. Watching the sweat trickle down his biceps and chest as he lifted weights. Seeing the firmness of his thighs and his tight bum as he ran on the treadmill.
It was wrong. He was my best friend. And he had a girlfriend. One that didn’t deserve him, but that wasn’t the point. I had morals and that was a line I wasn’t going to cross. So I’d never gone to the gym with him again and always tried to avoid looking at his body. Pretty hard, especially during the summer months, when he wore those sexy tight vests and had his arms on show.
Oh, I remember those arms and that chest…
I wondered whether he was still built like a god.
I felt another tingle race through me.
Stop it…
Anyway, knowing Melody, she’d had a few drinks and was drunk on nostalgia too, so was probably exaggerating about how good he looked just to persuade me to come. But it wouldn’t work.
Even if he was still hot, looks weren’t everything. I doubted he was single anyway.
My mind wandered, thinking about what Mike was doing now. We’d both always wanted to teach. He was ambitious, so I bet he was already on track to become the head teacher of a top school. I may have been tempted once or twice to Google him over the years to find out…
I had one moment of weakness when I actually did and was shocked to find a bald, overweight guy at the top of my search. Then when I’d clicked on the picture, I’d realised that it wasn’t him. Mike was a popular name (at uni there were three Mikes in our year—that’s why we’d often called him Mike Jones) and I guessed his surname was pretty common too. After that, I’d vowed never to look again.
I knew I could find out the answers to all of my questions and more, if I just went along tonight. But the sensible voice shouting loudly in my head told me there was no point and to keep my bum firmly on the sofa and stay at home.
Melody
Did some detective work and Heather told me he is single!!!
Melody
I repeat: MIKE IS SINGLE!!! Once word gets out, he won’t be for long. Get your arse down here pronto, Isabella! xoxo
My stomach flipped. He was single? That was a surprise.
Every time he broke up with Rebecca (I lost count of how many times they were on and off—could easily be in the hundreds), there was always a queue of women longer than the January sales, eager to take her place.
My mind whizzed again, thinking about what might have happened. Maybe he’d just got divorced. Then again, Mike never had really done the whole commitment thing, so I couldn’t see him being dragged down the aisle. Marriage and long-term relationships had never been his thing. Shame, because he was smart, kind, funny and gorgeous.
Looking back, it seemed like he had the total package: looks, personality and chemistry. But I knew he couldn’t have been as perfect as I made him out to be.
My memory had clearly become distorted over the years. That was the thing with time: it romanticised things. Everything always seemed like it was glossier in the good old days when we were young and naïve, but in reality it wasn’t true. He’d rejected me. Case in point. It was just a silly little crush.
Sophia had said she had something important to tell me this evening and would be calling me any minute. Otherwise, I would’ve just switched off my phone.
I’d just text Melody and tell her I couldn’t come. Again.
Me
Thanks for all the updates. Not going to be able to read any more of your texts now, though, so don’t worry about sending them. Just go and enjoy yourself! Say hi to everyone. xxx
Melody
What the hell is wrong with you, woman?!!! I’ve just told you your Mr Right is here, in this room, and is SINGLE and you’re still spouting BS about being busy?!
Melody
The other day you were complaining about how hard it was to date and find someone decent and I’ve just told you your perfect man is RIGHT HERE. TONIGHT!!
Melody
You tried to play it cool, but I know you liked him a lot more than you let on. I never understood why you guys didn’t go out when you both became single. You would’ve been so good together!!
Melody
The timing might have been off back then, but this could be your chance to secure a lifetime of happiness!
Melody
Just in case my previous messages weren’t clear, let me repeat: MIKE JONES is HERE and UNATTACHED! Come NOW! xoxo
Her constant use of CAPS was so aggressive. I was beginning to wish I’d never confessed to her about my crush on Mike a few years after we’d graduated. I knew it would come back to bite me in the bum.
Me
NO! I know you’re trying to look out for me Mel, but I CAN’T. Sorry.
Hopefully, now I’d replied in CAPS and given her a hard no, she’d finally get the message.
I pressed play on the remote control and took a sip of Chardonnay, wondering what that Edwin guy would have to say about it. Was this wine just as orgasmic as the one we’d had at that bar? I shook my head and chuckled. As soul-destroying as it had felt at the time, I had to admit I wouldn’t forget that date in a hurry. And if I didn’t laugh about it, I’d have to cry about the sorry state of my love life.
I knew Melody thought going tonight was going to magically resolve it and that I’d end the evening riding off with my Prince Charming, but she was wrong. As rubbish as things were on the romance front, I’d still be better off staying in.
Just as I thought I was finally off the hook about tonight, my phone rang. No prizes for guessing who it was. She was like a dog with a bone. Clearly I hadn’t been firm enough. No more pussyfooting around. I had to be more direct.
‘For the last time, I am not going to the stupid reunion! I don’t care if Mike is there. Hell, I don’t care if Brad Pitt and George Clooney are cavorting on the tables right now doing a striptease. I. Am. Not. Coming!’
There. I’d done it. I rarely raised my voice, so she’d definitely know I was serious. If she didn’t get the message from that, I didn’t know what it would take.
‘I reckon, Brad and George will be very disappointed to hear that. I would be too…’
OMG.
Ground swallow me up now.
I held the phone in front of me and studied the name on the screen. Yep. It was definitely Melody that had called me, but it wasn’t her that had spoken. I’d recognise that voice anywhere.
It was him.
Mike Jones.
My heart raced and my stomach plummeted.
‘Bells? Are you there? It’s me. Mike.’
Shit.
My body tingled at the sound of him saying my nickname. He was still the only one who called me that.
My brain scrambled. I knew I needed to say something, but it was like someone had pressed the erase button. I couldn’t find the words. And I’d apparently lost the power of speech too. My mouth opened and closed repeatedly like a hungry goldfish, but nothing came out.
‘Mike! Hi… erm… long time no speak! Sorry about that. Just… before… I didn’t mean… it’s just… of course I’d want to see Brad and George. I mean, who wouldn’t want to have a look at their meat and two veg? I definitely would! And I’d like to see you too. Not just your willy, obviously—I’m interested in seeing all of you… I mean…’
Oh God.
Seriously?
Please don’t tell me I’d just told Mike I wanted to see his dick. Yes, I’d dreamt about it many times, but I was never supposed to say that out loud.
Bloody hell.
‘Sorry, I… I’ve been drinking. I’m not thinking clearly. You remember what a lightweight I was. I always speak gibberish when I have alcohol.’ I laughed awkwardly, praying he’d see the funny side.
‘Well, if George and Brad are looking for someone to join their Chippendale act, I reckon I could make myself available for special bookings,’ he chuckled. Phew. Glad he still had a sense of humour.‘Still a lightweight, eh? You were always so cute when you were tipsy.’
My heart fluttered.
Mike just called me cute.
No. No. No. Get a grip.
‘Yeah, so anyway, nice speaking to you. Er, h-have a good time this evening. Better go…’
‘Wait!’ Mike shouted. ‘Are you really not coming tonight? At all? I know you’ve got plans and stuff, but I’d really love to see you. Even if it’s for half an hour. It’s been ages.’
‘I—I don’t know, by the time I get there it’d be late and—’
‘There’s loads of time! Apparently they’ve got this place until one, maybe even later, and it’s only just gone ten. Please come, Bella. Please. For me? I’ve really missed you.’
As those words tumbled from his mouth, it was like my brain started playing a montage of rainbows, sunsets and every romantic scene in a romcom.
The world’s population of butterflies simultaneously took up residence in my stomach and began fluttering like crazy.
Game over.
‘Okay, I’ll come.’ The words flew out of my mouth before I had a chance to stop them. I’d always found it hard to say no to him.
‘Amazing! See you soon!’
‘Yeah… see you soon.’ I dropped the phone on the sofa and tried to take everything in.
I’d just spoken to Mike.
Agreed to go to the reunion.
I was going to see my old crush.
The guy who’d crushed my heart.
What the hell was I thinking?