The Bear’s Nanny by Erin Havoc

03

ASTRID

MY STEPS TAKE me to the entrance of Hexed, a bar. No, not a bar. The bar. Shadow Falls is such a small, itsy-bitsy place; there’s only one. What kind of city has only one bar? Every respectful hamlet should have an array of options.

Oh, who am I lying to? It doesn’t matter. We all know how this is going to go. I’ll start with a couple of tequila shots, just to get my blood pumping, and then I’ll slide into the ever-faithful glass of beer. Tequila gets me started, but it’s the beer that gets me going.

In the back of my mind, the old Astrid doesn’t like the path we’re treading. But that’s why I pushed her back. Old Astrid was innocent and bright-eyed. She believed she had found a family with her ex and his son. And she was wrong. She was so wrong it still hurts. My heart’s shattered because of her. Because of her stupid optimism.

I tilt my chin up and ignore any cries from my conscience, telling me I should stop drinking so much. But alcohol is the one thing keeping me distracted these days. Not even food tastes good anymore. I don’t want to read. Life’s dull and boring; alcohol makes things more interesting.

My hands spread on the door, and I push it open, ambling inside with a forced smile on my face. The bar, the only bar in the city, is quite crowded. Not a surprise since there are no other options.

Some heads turn toward me. I’m the new girl in town, and it must be quite a happening for a place this small. Some brows quirk up, mouths flash white teeth, and I take my time making an entrance, pushing my shoulders back and ambling toward the bar.

First impressions matter and the place is so packed I hope I can catch someone’s eye. Because there’s one very interesting thing I learned about this town during my day here.There are so many hot men around it should be a tourist attraction. Not kidding.

Come see the town with the highest rate of handsome men per square mile!

I’d pay for that.

One table has a group of guys who look my way with grins on their faces: blonds, brunettes, and one redhead. There are tall men and muscular ones, lithe and athletic or buffed up. Another table has a dark-skinned hunk with glittering gold eyes, another has a solitary man with long silver hair. The types are distinct. They’re different, and I dig that. How there’s beauty in uniqueness.

I also dig that several of them are looking at me with appreciation. The heat of several gazes sliding down my curvy body makes my skin flare. As a big girl, this is unexpected. Unusual. I’m more often scrapping for an ounce of attention, and I felt blessed when I got married. My ex-husband never let me forget how grateful I should be. But tonight, I feel powerful. Being the new girl in town is amazing.

There’s a bar seat waiting for me, and I pull the stool back to climb on top of it. There’s not much grace in the wiggling of my thick ass, but I do my best to pretend it’s on purpose.

Once I’m settled, I look around. The bar is cozy, warm light dimmed to make the ambiance soft. The walls are wooden, as apparently every other building in town, dark mahogany, smooth to the touch. I run my hand over the counter, appreciating how the wood glimmers beneath the lights. Frames cover the walls; black and white pictures of people kneeling in front of the bar or sitting on tables and clinking their glasses. There are also paintings of the woods and the mountain. The grocery store has a couple of those too, as does the tiny inn I’m staying in. These people appreciate their spot on Earth.

It’s heartwarming, really. We’re so used to just live in a place. I used to wake up and go to work, then go home and do my chores. Always so worried about what my husband would think. How his son would feel. Even the times we left home it was to go to restaurants, the movies, or some concert. Never to hike, never to appreciate the land. It’s awe-inspiring how these people love this spot. I’ve only been here for hours, and it’s obvious.

The bartender approaches with a grin. She’s so pretty; the orange lights make her white hair look golden. Her eyes twinkle a violet light when they meet mine. Though her hair is hoary, I can’t tell how old she is.

“Why, you must be the newcomer!” There’s a smile on her face, but I can see it’s hesitant.

It’s a small town, so some people must find it odd when a stranger shows up. I put my best smile on. “That I am. The name’s Astrid.”

She grins, and it looks honest this time. She shoots out a hand. “A pleasure. I’m Sabrina. Welcome to Shadow Falls!”

“Thank you!” I shake her hand, her fingers firm around mine. She’s the first one to greet me like this, even if I’m not sure I’m staying. With a shake of my head, I lean forward. “I don’t think I’m staying long, though.”

Sabrina lets my hand go and bats hers in the air dismissively. “Oh, of course you are.”

I chuckle. “Am I now?”

She bobs her head as she turns for her materials behind the bar. I watch her pick lemons up, then a massive sprig of mint and a tall glass. “Shadow Falls has a way of keeping people around, you know?” She shoots me a knowing glance. “It’s rare for outsiders to come stumbling in here. But once they do, they can’t leave.”

My head tilts. The way she says it is almost... Ominous. I shake the thought away. It makes no sense. This isn’t a horror movie, though the day I found my husband cheating on me surely felt like it.

“Can’t leave?” I insist, watching her squeezing the lemons into the glass, then pouring ice cubes into it. “Why?”

She waves a hand around, her fingers wet with lemon juice. “It’s the place, you know? There’s something about it that calls to whoever needs it the most.” A forefinger pointed at me, she smiles. “And I bet you need this place.”

Do I need it? Honestly, I like it so far. It’s quiet and quaint, and the air is so freaking pure it feels like my lungs can’t take it half of the time. But need it? Not so sure.

“I’m just running away from my problems,” I admit. Earlier than I expected. I haven’t had a drop of alcohol yet, and it feels like I’m telling the bartender too much. Remembering the reason I came here, I bat my eyelashes and laugh. “Oh, I forgot to place an order.”

“No, you didn’t,” Sabrina says with confidence as she slides the glass in my direction.

It’s beautiful. The glass sweats, filled with ice cubes and mint leaves. Some leaves break the surface of the drink, and the smell is divine. Bubbles climb the inside of the glass, and I want to take a picture of it.

But I didn’t ask for it. Did I?

My fingers curling around the frosty glass, I bring it to my lips. Maybe she looked at me and tried to guess my favorite drink. This looks a hundred percent like a well-made mojito, and I dig that. The mint scent hits me and makes me hum in pleasure.

But when I take a sip, there’s none of the burning I’m used to. I cock a brow. Surely I’m mistaken. The drink is fabulous. Refreshing and sweet and sour because of the lemon. The mint leaves an aftertaste.

But there’s no alcohol in it.

I lick the remnants from the corner of my mouth and meet her eyes. Sabrina has been watching me with an expectant smile. I look around the counter but can’t find the bottle of rum. Has she forgotten to put the alcohol in?

With an apologetic smile, I tap a napkin to my upper lip. “This is amazing. But I think you’ve...” I clear my throat. I’ve never been good at pointing out other people’s mistakes for fear they would hate me. “You’ve forgotten the alcohol. Or maybe I’m too used to it,” I add quickly, my cheeks warming.

I hate to do that. And Sabrina looks like a friendly person to have around. Even if I don’t stay here for long, I don’t want to ruin a possible friendship before it even begins.

But she shakes her head, her lips twisting into a smile. “No, I didn’t.” She leans forward. “You don’t need that. Not tonight.”

That catches me off guard. “I don’t?”

“No, you don’t. You drink because your life’s dull, right?” She motions for the surrounding bar. “It won’t be dull tonight. I’ll keep you company, and we’ll chat, and you won’t even miss it.”

I take a long look at Sabrina. How strange. Can she read minds?

Maybe it’s a usual thing. Drunks come here and tell her they drink because life’s gray and shitty, and she does her therapist thing. That certainly won’t help with the owner’s finances.

“So, how did you get here?” She fills two mugs of beer under the tap on her left. Her eyes are on me, and she does it without an ounce of effort.

“Car broke down,” I say, jutting a thumb behind me to the entrance. “The guys at the mechanic shop are fixing it. Turns out skipping repairs is not a wise thing to do.” Another one to my list.

“No, it isn’t,” she laughs, sliding the mugs across the counter. I watch them there for a second before a man appears next to me and picks them up.

He’s red-haired, and he shoots me a cute smile that makes my stomach flip before he leaves. Cute. My gaze follows him back to his table, then I take another look at the hall. So many handsome men are here tonight. But none of them is the hottie in the grocery store.

“Are you looking for someone?” Sabrina asks with her eyes narrowed and a smile on her face. I’m liking her more and more by the second. It’s like we’ve known each other forever.

“Actually, yeah. I met this guy at the grocery store. The cashier told me his name is Kieran?” My stomach flips again, but it’s different now. There’s expectation.

I’ve thought of him more often than I should. Shadow Falls has many beauties, but Kieran is the one who takes the crown. The man is, by far, the most handsome I’ve seen, and I’ve seen many. There’s something about him that attracts me, like Ballantine’s whiskey on sale.

I’ve told myself it’s because I saw him with his baby, and my biological clock just went crazy. There’s something about men who care for their children. Even if it’s the least you expect of a father, the majority don't care about that. They say it’s a woman’s duty. My ex, for example. I helped his son get dressed and do his homework when he was younger. I nursed him back to health when he got the flu or when he had measles. All of this was expected of me.

But Kieran just... Calls to something deeper inside me. Something I can’t quite point out. I tell myself it’s my lust wanting to bounce, and though that’s not a lie, it’s not entirely true either. Either way, he’d be an amazing rebound if a miracle happened, and he was single. But with a cute baby on his arm? No way. The man must have a wife, or at least a girlfriend. These women here aren’t mad enough to let a hunk of a man like that walk around single. He’s too good to be true.

Sabrina studies me for a moment, her hands always moving behind the counter. Then, a smile pops on her face, like fireworks. “Kieran’s not usually around. Even less now, with the baby, you know?”

“Oh, yeah. Sure.” I don’t have the guts to ask her if he has a wife.

“But you might see him soon enough. Say, do you have plans for a job? The car will surely take a while to get fixed.”

I arch an eyebrow. Sabrina is a mind reader. Or maybe the town’s so small that news travels fast. “Yeah, it’ll take a week or so. They have to bring some parts from out of town.” I blink rapidly. “I was thinking of finding a part-time job.” Though I have some money saved up, a job would keep my mind busy. And money is always good.

“Fantastic,” Sabrina chimes in. “I just happen to know of someone who needs a hand. Interested?”

She doesn’t wait for my answer to turn and pick up her phone. She types a message and sends it off before she slides my empty glass towards her.

“I’m interested,” I answer, too late.

She chuckles. “I know.” Sabrina brings the glass up and shimmies it. “What did you think? Would you like more?”

A smile crawls across my lips. I nod at her offer of more alcohol-free mojito, my heart warm and content. There’s something about this place, something that promises better times to come.

Maybe Sabrina’s right. This might be a place I can start over. Or at least take some time off.

The mountain looming outside isn’t threatening, but welcoming. In the back of my mind, I know I haven’t asked Sabrina about the job description. But I don’t mind. Maybe the town does call to people who need it. And perhaps this is the chance I have of turning things around.