A Secret to Shatter by Katie O’Connor

Chapter Twelve

“Have you considered selling the equipment and turning the hay fields into grazing land?” Ira asked Robert. They’d been in the equipment barn working on the tractor, trying to repair its hydraulics for nearly three hours. As near as Ira could tell, the equipment was due to hit the recycling pile. A warm breeze blew through the open equipment door and fresh cut grass replaced the oily stench of half repaired equipment.

“And then what would the cows eat?” Robert snapped. “You’re not thinking this through. Fix the tractor, bring in the first crop of hay and hope the weather holds for a second crop. We’ll have hay for the entire winter.” He cussed under his breath. “Sell the tractors. Dang boy is an idiot.”

“First, I am not an idiot,” Ira declared patiently. Robert wasn’t being mean, or malicious, he was frustrated. “Second, unless I miss my guess, this tractor probably needs twenty grand worth of repairs. You’d be better off to buy a new one and sell this one for parts. With the cost of new equipment, it might make better financial sense to get rid of it and purchase the hay. Do you want me to run a financial analysis of the cost benefits?”

“No. Get back to work. We can fix this. Hand me a nine-sixteenths wrench.”

Ira picked up the wrench from the rolling tool cart and passed it over. “I think I’ll run the analysis, on my own time, just because I’m curious.”

“Curious about what?” Ken asked, striding into the equipment barn. “Morning, Dad. Ira.” The last word was curt and barely an acknowledgement at all. Ira chose not to let it bother him. No skin off his nose if Ken had a burr in his saddle.

“Nonsense,” Robert declared. “The boy’s talking nonsense.”

Ken’s expression suggested he wanted to know more, so Ira spoke up. “In my opinion, I believe the ranch might be better off if we sold the haying equipment, turned the land into grazing land, and added more cattle. The increased beef sales could more than offset the cost of buying hay. The savings from not fixing this tractor or buying a new one would be a benefit too. I don’t know what yearly maintenance is, but it seems like it must be high.”

“It’s too danged high,” Ken agreed. “I’ve been trying to tell Dad it’s time to consider new options. I’ve switched at my place.” He gestured with his head in the direction of his own ranch. “I’m more profitable now. Sold my big tractor and haying equipment for a smaller one with forks for hay bales, and a bucket for plowing the driveway.”

“This land has seen enough profit to raise all you boys in a damned nice lifestyle. This machine has served me perfectly for twenty years. She has a dozen years left in her,” Robert snapped.

“And for that, we are grateful. But she was nearly new back then. Unfortunately, she has seen better days,” Ken said.

Ira grimaced to himself. He hadn’t meant to step into an old family argument, but apparently, he had. “I noticed the little skid-steer. It has all the equipment you need for clearing snow and moving dirt. There’s even a brush mower attachment. I know I’m new to the ranch, and very happy to have this job, but I think the skid-steer would be equipment enough for most jobs, if you stopped growing hay.” The small track loader in another part of the equipment shed was a versatile model with tracks instead of wheels. It was in great shape. Ira had checked it over when he was getting to know the ranch equipment last week. He was mechanically minded, and he knew when a piece of equipment had reached its end, like the main tractor had.

“Fine,” Robert barked, throwing down his wrench. It clattered loudly on the tool table. “Get the numbers and I’ll consider it.” He frowned and shook his finger at the two men. “Don’t take this as agreement. I’ll consider it. Nothing more. And do it on your own time.”

He stomped out of the equipment barn toward the house.

Ira and Ken stared at him until he disappeared from sight over a low hill.

“That went well,” Ira drawled dryly, meaning the exact opposite.

“Don’t sell yourself short, boy,” Ken said. “You got him to consider the idea. Which is more than I’ve accomplished in six years.” He patted Ira on the back. “Thanks. What’s the issue with the tractor this time?”

Briefly, Ira explained the mechanical problem.

“I expect you’re right. It’s going to need a complete overhaul of the hydraulics. You might be better off to rent something to bring in the first crop and fix it while you wait for the second.”

“I suggested that.” Ira grabbed the wrench Robert had discarded and went back to work.

“I have to admit, you’ve got balls, standing up to him,” Ken commented, holding the work light so Ira could see better.

“You should have heard him when I offered to buy a new tractor and haying equipment with the money he’d sent my mother over the years. He practically blew his top. His face was so red I though he was having another heart attack. Thank heaven he didn’t.”

“One thing our father has is a stubborn streak a mile wide. Would you actually spend your own money on this place?”

Ken, who had stormed off the ranch only days ago because Robert claimed Ira as his son, had just inadvertently referred to Robert as Ira’s father as well. He knew better than to mention the slip. No sense stirring up another hornet’s nest.

“Yes,” Ira said, “I would give him back his money. I haven’t touched a cent of it. I don’t need it. I earned a decent salary in the army. With my current wage, I’m set for a while.”

“I respect your willingness to offer him back the money. I think you’re an idiot for doing so, and risking damaging his pride, but I respect your offer.” Ken nodded sagely, and leaned his elbows on the tractor and stared at the hydraulics.

“Yeah,” Ira laughed. “I forgot to consider his pride. In Robert’s mind, it’s my money, money he paid to support me, just as he supported the rest of you. He’s a solid, reputable man, even if he is too stubborn.”

“Dang right he is.”

They chuckled together.

“I think I’ll wait a while to suggest renting equipment,” Ira declared. “What brings you by?”

“I’m making a supply run. I’m out of dog and cat food. Plus, I need chicken feed and a couple rolls of barbed wire. Thought Dad might need a few things.”

“He’s got a list on the clipboard in the kitchen.”

“Well then, let’s head up to the house and scrounge a coffee and snack. After a quick visit with Mom, we can hit town.”

The implied acceptance of Ira as at least a ranch hand, maybe a brother, warmed Ira right through. Perhaps bickering with Robert was a good thing after all. Tension he didn’t realize he was holding slipped from his spine and he breathed a relaxed breath. “Let’s do that,” he agreed. “I could use a cup of coffee.”

Sue greeted them warmly when they entered the kitchen. “Hi, boys. I just started a fresh pot of coffee. Good to see you both.” She embraced Ken, then Ira. “Sit down, sit down. I’ll grab some cookies.”

They sat as she bustled around the kitchen pouring coffee and setting out snacks. “What’s up with your father?” she asked. “I saw him storm past into his work shed.”

Robert had only given Ira a brief glimpse into his small, private shed. Robert claimed the small space was his refuge from his wife and kids. He holed away inside, working on leather projects as a mean to relax. He’d already built a number of intricate purses and belts. He made custom leather book covers and was working on a saddle for Sue for Christmas. While Ira had a tour of the shop and projects, it was clear Robert’s man cave was by invitation only.

Ken laughed. “Ira had the nerve to suggest we stop growing our own hay.”

Sue laughed. “Oh no. Not another one. He’ll feel like he’s being attacked from all sides. I made the mistake of mentioning it this morning and he came unglued. Poor man.”

“Poor man?” Ira asked.

“Yes, dear.” She patted Ira’s hand as she joined them at the kitchen table. “Sometimes, when you are stubborn and have taken a stand, it’s difficult to back down, even when you know you may be wrong. When you get into a relationship with a woman, remember that.” She threw a significant glance at Ken who was spending all his free time courting his ex-wife in an attempt to woo her back.

Ira stifled a laugh. He knew what it was like to have a mother fret over you every second. Damn, he missed his mom. “I’ll keep it in mind, Sue. Thanks for the advice.” He really was grateful his new stepmother treated him like one of her own. The sense of belonging helped ease the loss of his own mother.

“How is it going with you and Honey?” she asked.

“Good. I guess.”

“What’s that mean?” Ken asked.

“Nothing.” Ira banked a sigh. “She’s nice.”

“I hear a but,” Sue said. “Honey is a lovely girl. So positive. So bright.”

So bright? Yeah, Honey was bright and sunshiny. “I just don’t understand why she’s happy as a waitress. Shouldn’t she want more?” He regretted the words as soon as he said them. He wasn’t usually so judgmental.

“Shouldn’t she be happy and enjoy what she does?” Sue countered, sipping her coffee. “I could easily have gone back to work after the girls were born. I did briefly. Then I married Robert. I’m happy as a wife and mother. It’s enough for me. Maybe I’m not living up to my intellectual and financial potential, but I am happy. Is that wrong?”

Ira didn’t have a chance to process the question before Ken spoke.

“One thing I’ve learned for sure,” Ken put in, “is women need to be happy. At home, at work. I’m sure Lindy wouldn’t have left me if I let her put the kids in daycare and go back to work. Stupidest damn mistake I ever made. I put my foot down and refused to bend.”

“Happiness is important, I get that.” Ira agreed. “But she could be so much more.” He didn’t know how to express his disappointment in Honey’s career choice. A waitress and some kind of social media poster, or whatever else she did. It just seemed she could do better.

“Ask yourself this,” Sue suggested, “How is it any of your concern? If Honey is happy, and has enough money to meet her needs, does your impression of her career actually matter?”

On one hand, what she said made sense, but on the other, why didn’t Honey live up to her potential and be more?

Robert strode through the back door, his arrival saving Ira from having to face Sue’s question and answer her.

She did get in one parting shot. “Think about it, Ira. What’s more important, your opinion, or Honey’s happiness?”