Their Broken Pieces by Jessica Gomez

Chapter Forty-Three

Alex

 

 

My steps are heavy, lead weights dragging as I trudge to Carlos’s room. I left my heart and soul back there, and I need to dull this pain. My entire body aches with it, as if I’ve lost someone else I love to death. These sentiments are all too similar.

When I bang on Carlos’s door, there’s no answer, leaving me standing in a trance for who knows how long, before realizing that he’s probably at the pool with those girls. I’d seen him there every day since we arrived.

When I get to the pool, I see Carlos and my gang right away, talking loudly in Spanish and splashing flirty girls with water. He sees me before I reach them and his face transforms from a smile to dead serious when he notices my mood. He drops the girl he’s talking to and walks over to me, cutting me off before I can reach the group.

Que pasa, Alex?” I swallow before meeting his eyes. Carlos knows me better than anyone… except Jasmine. He can read my expression and tell that something’s wrong.

“Nada.” I try to keep my voice hard, but fail.

“Is it Jasmine? Is she all right?”

My eyes snap to him, daring him to say her name again. “Leave it alone, Carlos,” I warn.

“Sí. Téngalo su manera.” He holds his hands up in surrender.

We walk over to the rest of the guys; everyone’s saying hi and telling me it’s good to see me. I conjure the last of my strength and shake hands, throwing a few signs to let them know I’m glad I’m here as well. No sooner do I sit down, the girl Carlos was talking to climbs out of the water and saunters over, taking the seat next to mine.

“Hi. You’re Alex, right? Carlos told me about you. You’re the leader?” Carlos has been running his mouth again, and by the way I glare at him, he knows I don’t appreciate it.

He tries to intervene. “Hey, Brandy. Mi amigo doesn’t want company right now. Why don’t you…”

“No. She’s fine.” Brandy could be a pleasurable distraction, especially if Jasmine comes looking for me; I could use her as a blocker. Jasmine would surrender if she thought I was going to be with someone else right after her. I close my eyes and squeeze them tight. I’m in denial that I’m going to be one of those guys.

Carlos sees it and asks me, “Estás seguro de que todo está bien?” He knows what I’m doing, having witnessed the game since everyone I’ve ever cared for died.

“Sí mente su propio negocio,” I growl at him. If he reminds me about Jasmine every second, I’ll never survive the next twenty-four hours.

Brandy’s picking up on the tension in my voice, understanding by the tone that we’re arguing, even though her first language is English. She crosses and uncrosses her long white legs, feeling uncomfortable, but not ready to let me go.

Carlos walks over to the rest of the group and the girl he was talking to earlier. His body language and the contorting mask he’s wearing let me know I hurt him. He may be a member of my gang, and I may be the leader, but he’s still my friend. Someone who’s been there since the beginning of everything. Before Marisol, Papa, Jasmine, and Jace. He’s the only friend I’ll have left after I leave Jasmine behind, and I was just a real hijo de puta.

“Sorry,” I say to Brandy. I can’t afford to lose this distraction. I’m relying on her to keep me sane until I climb aboard that plane. “Things are a little tense today.” She knows I’m the leader of the gang and assumes that something’s wrong within the ranks. This little trick usually helps keep ladies around. They like the thrill of hooking up with a gang banger.

I can tell it’s working because she leans into me. “That’s all right. I don’t mind,” she says in a seductive voice. “What are your plans for the rest of the day?”

Going back to my room, taking my novia in my arms, kissing her, and telling her I love her, and that I’m so sorry for everything I’ve just done, especially for what I know I’m about to do. I breathe in deep, blow it out, along with all of those thoughts, and ask, “What do you want them to be?” The girls eat it up, feeling as if they have some kind of control over someone dangerous like me.

Her smile is slow and sexy. It does nothing for me. The excitement I once felt when a hot female comes on to me is nowhere to be found. Instead, flashes of Jasmine bombard me.

“I think Lacey’s going to hang out with your friend Carlos tonight. You want to come with?” She leans closer, practically rubbing on me like a cat in heat.

Even though my lip curls in disgust, I reply with a hint of the Navarro charm. “Sí.”