Pretty Falling Pieces by Isabelle Culpo

Chapter Seventeen

Idon’t know if the events of last night have had a chance to sink in. As I sit next to Theo on our flight back to Auckland, I still don’t know quite how I feel about everything.

When I was twelve years old, I understood that being in a relationship with someone would always be difficult for me. Even before I was fully grown, it became obvious at a young age the way I looked was off-putting to some people, especially boys.

When I was sixteen, I had hope. After spending one summer on a strict diet of canned chicken, greens, and All Bran, as well as a gruelling regimen of HIIT workouts, I managed to lose 18 kg. It barely made a dent, but I was optimistic from my slightly slimmer physique.

I figured that if I just kept going and managed to lose the rest of the weight, eventually I’d look like my peers and finally be accepted. All of my other friends had started getting hit on by the guys in our class by then anyway. I was confident that by the time our school ball rolled around next year, I would’ve at least caught the eye of someone.

What I didn’t realise at the time was how critical teenage boys could be. So even though family members had commented on how “good” I was looking after dropping some weight, at the end of the day, to them I was still just fat.

My college had a rule about attending our school ball. No date, no entry. They claimed this was to prevent bad behaviour from the male students; presuming that if a guy was responsible for looking after his date, then he was less likely to get drunk with his mates and cause chaos at an underage event. Not only was this theory seriously flawed considering the ones who ended up in the worst state, intoxicated and throwing up from the alcohol that they snuck in, were mainly girls. It meant that if you weren’t asked out by someone, you couldn’t attend.

As our ball neared, the female half of the student body became obsessed with discussing dresses, hair, and makeup. What colour, what style, and what makeup artist they were using.

I couldn’t participate in those discussions because I’d yet to be picked off the shelf and partnered up. On the night of our ball, while most girls were giddy with excitement, dressed head to toe in beautiful gowns, I was at home with my parents eating a microwave frozen pizza and ice cream.

My parents, who had friends with children that also attended my school, were mortified that I was spending the night at home like a loser.

At that point, all hope I had was lost.

I had resigned myself to being alone, for the rest of my life.

If only that seventeen-year-old girl knew that one day not only would someone eventually be interested in her, but he would be the gorgeous, intelligent, compassionate man next to her, maybe getting through high school would’ve been a little easier.

Now that we’ve ascended above the clouds and the mountain ranges are no longer visible, I turn my gaze to Theo and find him staring right back at me.

“You seem quiet this morning,” he says.

“Well, I didn’t exactly get much sleep last night.” Thanks to you.

His boyish smile makes my heart ache.

Reaching into his pocket, he pulls out a little black velvet box. “I got you something to remind you of this trip. And hopefully of me…”

I can promise you I won’t forget this weekend for as long as I live.

He hands me the box. I noticed the jeweler when we were in town but never knew Theo went inside. I open the lid to find a beautiful opal necklace hanging off a silver chain, diamonds framing the gemstone. The iridescent sparkles catch the sunshine pouring through the window, making the necklace take on an almost magical quality.

“It’s stunning, Theo. Thank you. For everything.”

I take the necklace from the box and fasten it around my neck. No one has ever bought me something like this before. I’ll cherish it forever.

“You’re welcome, baby. As soon as I saw it, I thought of you. You seem to have an affinity for all things sparkly,” he says, touching the diamond stud on my left ear.

I laugh at his accurate observation. “Yeah, I don’t know why but I’ve always liked pretty, shiny things. I’m like a magpie. My parents have always traveled a lot. I remember when I was about six or seven years old they went to Paris and brought me back a little Chanel bottle key chain that was embellished with crystals. I was obsessed with it, and I guess that’s where the love affair began.”

“Are you close with your parents?”

“It’s complicated.” While they haven’t done anything towards me like Theo’s dad, our relationship is strained to say the least.

“I’m sure I can keep up. Do they live in Auckland as well?”

“Yes, but they’re overseas right now, probably cruising around a cluster of Islands in the Pacific. They honestly don’t spend much time here. My dad started a successful drain laying company, and now he’s basically retired and spends his time travelling the world. Together they’ve visited nearly every country in Europe.”

He’s thoughtful for a second then asks, “Did they ever take you on any of those trips around the world?”

No they didn’t. They prefer to travel light, and an obese daughter is too much baggage.

“I’ve always been in school and then started work, so it’s never really been the right time. Now that I’m working for you however, it’s easier to take some time off,” I tease.

“Exactly, life’s way too fucking short to miss out on seeing the world. As your boss, and more importantly your boyfriend, I’ll allow you as much time off for travel as you like. I only have one condition…that I go with you.”

“Deal,” I giggle, offering my hand.

He shakes it then says, “Next time your parents are in Auckland, I’d like to meet them. If that’s okay with you?”

“Okay, when they’re home we can go out for dinner sometime.”

For some reason, instead of feeling excited by the prospect of introducing the first person to my parents, I feel a twinge of unease.

* * *

Touching down at Auckland Airport feels a little depressing.

Before I started working for myself full time, I used to get the worst case of Sunday blues. Dreading the thought of having to face a full eight hours at the office the next day. While I love my job now, this past weekend has been one of the best of my life, and I’m not quite ready to return back to reality just yet. I’m already missing Queenstown, and we haven’t even been back an hour.

It was the best distraction from Thursday night, even though I know eventually I’m going to have to face it. There’s clearly history between Allie and Theo, and my gut tells me she’ll be back to cause trouble in the near future.

Once we’ve cleared the airport, Theo packs the luggage into his boot. “I’m going to head into the office for the rest of the afternoon to catch up on a few things, so I’ll drop you off at your place. I was thinking we could maybe grab some dinner. There’s a new Japanese restaurant that’s just opened up if you’re keen to give that a try.”

“Sounds good,” I reply. “Maybe we should invite Jess and Trent. I know Jess loves Asian cuisine.”

She goes crazy for any sort of exotic dish and it’ll be nice to have their company.

Also, I’m slightly paranoid that Theo will tire of me soon if we spend any more alone time together. Maybe not today but eventually he’ll realise what a bore I am. My dad said I was only tolerable in small doses. Even though I’d always been quiet, for some people that can be even more annoying than over-talking.

“Sure,” Theo replies. “I’ll make reservations while I’m at the office.”

“Great, I’ll call Jess and let her know.” I pull out my phone to flick her a text.

“I’ll walk you up,” Theo offers, when he pulls up outside my building.

“No, it’s fine.” I insist, “You head back to the office. I know you’ve got a lot of work to do. I just wanted to tell you how much I appreciate everything you’ve done for me this weekend. I had so much fun.”

A text notification comes through to my phone.

“This must be Jess. Let me check whether she’s keen for dinner and then you can make the reservations for four.” I pull my phone back out from my handbag to check.

JESS:YES we’re in! And I’m coming to your place before. I need all the details of last night stat. Can’t believe my best friend finally lost her v-card ;)

A sense of betrayal washes over me when I read that last sentence.

How on earth did she know that happened?

I had let her know Theo and I were heading away, but that’s it. It wouldn’t surprise me if Jess had a hunch this would happen and she’d try and push me for information, but for it to be so black and white?

The only explanation is someone told her, and since it didn’t come from me that only leaves Theo.

“What’s wrong?” he asks, concern in his voice.

I take a deep breath not even sure I want to know. For him to reveal that he shared such an intimate experience of my life without my knowledge is too painful right now.

“Theo…did you tell them we had sex?”

The instant remorse on his face tells me everything I need to know.

“It’s not like that, Imogen… I wanted to—”

I cut him off before he has the chance to finish. “Please. I don’t want to hear that right now. I feel so embarrassed, Theo. I’m not some seventeen-year-old that just lost her virginity. I’m twenty-four. Do you think I wanted that broadcasted to our closest friends? Who else have you told?” My voice sounds so shaky right now and I’m not sure whether it’s from sadness or anger.

Probably a combination of both.

“No one! I’m so sorry, please let’s just go inside and I’ll explain everything,” he says, grasping my shoulders and trying to lead me towards the door. I must be setting off signals for a meltdown because he’s gone into full damage control.

“No,” I say, pulling away from him. “Look, I need some space right now. I’ll text you later.” I know I sound cold but it’s either walk away now or say something I might regret.

He looks devastated and guilt starts to creep in. In a couple of hours when I’ve cooled down, I’ll let him explain; right now I just need to be in my apartment alone.

Some people draw their energy from being around others, I get it from complete solitude and right now my tank is empty. I can’t think rationally until I’ve had the chance to digest things in private.

He runs his hands through his hair. “Can I still see you tonight?”

“I’ll text you later, okay?” I avoid a definitive answer.

It’s not the end of the world. I’ll move on from it. Right now I’m just stung.

The only elevator in the building is occupied so I rest my bags down beside me and pull out my apartment keys from my handbag. When I look up, I notice Norman staring at me with a perplexed expression on his face. Today I’m definitely not in the mood for one of his half an hour chats. I smile, hoping to get away with just a wave this time, but instead of waving back he looks even more confused.

Jeez, something must be really wrong with him if he’s forgotten me already. I’ve only been gone a few days. I make a mental note to speak to him next time and make sure everything’s okay.

I turn the lock and open my door, juggling the bags in both hands.

At first glance, everything looks the same.

There’s no sign of forced entry or vandalism. Nothing seems out of place, but I have this nagging instinct telling me someone else has been in here while I’ve been away.

Jess?Maybe she stopped by to check on me after the event before realising I left for Queenstown.

Then the smell hits me.

Something familiar but difficult to put a name on. I know I recognise the scent I’m just not sure where from.

I grab my phone, completely ignore her previous text, and ask her whether she stopped by while I was away, then begin surveying the rest of the rooms.

While my lounge looks untouched, as I walk into my bedroom, I definitely know that something is wrong. To anyone else the changes would be imperceptible, but design is what I do for a living, and I’ve trained my eye to recognise even the smallest of details.

A cushion slightly out of place, a bedside cabinet that hasn’t been pushed in all the way.

Suddenly my heart is beating so hard I can feel it in my ears.

This place is too small for someone to be hiding somewhere. I would’ve heard them by now.

At least that’s what I tell myself as I step into my bathroom to check it.

The first thing I notice is the droplets of water that line the sink.

Now I know for certain someone has been here, that would’ve evaporated days ago since I last used it.

I stare at my phone, silently begging Jess to get back to me and say, “Yeah, I stopped by and used your bathroom then shuffled around your things.”

My shampoo and conditioner bottles catch my eye next. I always leave the label facing outward, one of my many obsessive compulsions. The conditioner has been turned slightly to the left.

Maybe I just forgot to put them in place the last time?

I grab both of them and pull them onto the bathroom counter. I don’t know why but something tells me to open it up.

I unscrew the lid of the conditioner and see the creamy white liquid inside.

Nothing out of the ordinary.

Realising I’m just being paranoid I go to put back on the lid when the smell hits me.

Being a brunette, I’m all too familiar with the various methods of hair removal. Waxing, threading, and shaving, you name it I’ve tried it. So even though I don’t use hair removal cream anymore I would recognise that distinct smell anywhere, and it’s currently completely masking the coconut fragrance I’m used to.

Someone has come into my apartment and poured hair removal cream into my conditioner bottle.

What the?