Pretty Falling Pieces by Isabelle Culpo

Chapter Sixteen

It’s nearly five o’clock by the time I get back; I thought for sure Theo would have beaten me here. Maybe he’s held up with his client?

Though he never mentioned what it was for, if he has business down here, he probably wants to do as much as possible before we leave for Auckland.

Since he mentioned we’d be going out for dinner I decide to start getting ready, and after a quick shower, I dry my hair and put on some light makeup.

The only dress I brought with me is hanging in the bathroom in a haphazard attempt to straighten out the creases that came from being packed up in a suitcase. I try on the LBD and can just barely pull up the zipper. The fabric clings to me like a second skin but at least it fits.

Even if it does leave nothing to the imagination.

My underwear is creating lines against the material since the dress fits tightly, so I decide to remove them and see if it makes a difference. I pull the bra off first and it instantly looks a million times better. The tightness of the dress offers enough support that I can get away without wearing one.

The underwear goes next, I work them down my legs underneath the dress. They’re almost at my ankles when I hear the beep of the room unlocking.

With my body bent forward, bum in the air, I look behind me to see Theo opening the door.

His eyes widen when he sees me, then his eyes instantly go to my underwear which I have gripped tightly in my hands.

“Sorry, I didn’t…” Theo stutters, looking a little sheepish.

I quickly pull them off and stand up straight to face him, noticing how pink his cheeks are, probably the first time I’ve seen him look embarrassed.

“This was the only dress I bought, and you could see them through it… That’s why I was…”

His eyes quickly flit up and down my body then he smiles.

His shoulders rise and fall with a heavy breath. “You look beautiful.”

I run my fingers through my tousled hair, probably wrecking the loose waves I just spent half an hour creating. “I didn’t know where we were going, so I thought it was better to be overdressed than under.”

“It’s perfect. We better get going, the reservations at seven.”

I grab my sequined clutch off the bed, shove the underwear in my suitcase, then head towards the door.

When I get close enough to him, he wraps his arm around my waist leading me out the door.

* * *

We arrive outside Botswana Butchery, a gorgeous restaurant nestled in the heart of Queenstown with spectacular lake views. I’ve never been to this restaurant before but it’s world renowned for luxury dining. The interiors are tasteful and luxurious with velvet jewel toned chairs and glossy black tables. It’s so cozy and warm in here, it feels more like someone’s home than a public eating place.

We’re escorted to one of the best tables, secluded enough to feel private, but still able to enjoy the stunning water views.

Our waiter pours us each a glass of lemon, mint, and cucumber water. “What can I get you to drink this evening?” he asks.

“We’ll take a bottle of Pinot Noir, thank you,” Theo answers, picking a Central Otago red.

Dinner is absolutely divine.

The potatoes, in particular, are deliciously soft and buttery.

By the time we’ve finished, I’m so full my stomach could burst. The waiter clears our plates and asks if we’d be interested in dessert. We’ve gone this far, I might as well top it off with something sweet. I’ve always been someone that had to finish off every savoury meal with something sugary. Even in Kenya where desserts aren’t as common, I’d always have either a piece of fruit or a protein bar in my room after dinner. Besides, the older woman at the table not far from us ordered a chocolate brownie that I’ve had my eye on all night.

As if reading my mind, Theo asks for one to be shared between us.

“It’s a shame this is our last night here. I wish we had more time,” he says, looking handsome in his white shirt with the top few buttons undone.

He’s right, it’s gone by way too quickly.

“I have a question to ask you and I just want you to hear me out, okay? I’m heading to Colorado at the end of the year. I’m developing a new ski lodge. I was planning to bring Trent with me, but I wondered if you’d like to come with me? I know you’ve only been back a few weeks…”

Colorado?

He continues, “I’ll take care of everything, it’ll just mean you’ll miss about a month of work.”

I’ve never been to the states before and even though we haven’t known each other long, I find myself getting excited about the prospect of going there with him.

“Maybe we can make a call closer to the time,” I suggest not wanting to come on too strong. “Who knows if we’ll still even be together then.”

I didn’t intend for the words to come out as harshly as they just sounded. Theo looks offended, and I can’t exactly blame him.

“What do you mean who knows if we’ll still be together?”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that. Just that I’ll need a little time to think it through. It’s an incredible offer, and I’m glad you would choose me to go with you,” I say sincerely.

“Don’t just say that because you’re telling me what I want to hear. I get that you have your reasons for being afraid to commit. But I need you to start seeing us as more than just an experiment that you can ditch whenever things start to get uncomfortable. Something else is holding you back from saying you’ll come, what is it?” he demands.

I’m afraid you’ll be done with me by then.

“Nothing. There’s nothing stopping me. I was thinking of returning to Africa at the end of the year, that’s all. I need to check in on the sanctuary and will have hopefully secured more funding by then, and we can start to execute on some of our plans.”

Relief washes over his face. “Maybe we could head to Colorado first then visit Kenya on our way back. I’d love to visit the sanctuary and see why it’s captured such a special place in your heart.”

“You’d really do that?” Working on a lodge and caring for elephants are worlds apart.

“Of course, Imogen, if something’s important to you, it’s important to me too.”

“Okay then, I’m in.”

* * *

The hotel staff has turned down our bed, lit the gas fireplace, and fashioned two intertwined swans from towels that adorn our bed. I take a seat on the edge of it and try to take off my heels.

Theo takes a seat beside me on the bed. “Do you need help with those?”

I already have one heel unstrapped from the buckle, but Theo crouches down in front of me anyway and slips the shoe off before moving to the next one.

There’s something about the action that feels overwhelmingly intimate, and I find myself standing and heading towards my suitcase as soon as both of them are off.

Theo picks them up by the straps and places them neatly by the bedroom door before shrugging off his jacket and resting it on the armchair.

Seeing him neatly put away our clothes makes me feel warm. I don’t know whether it’s because he’s noticed I like to keep things tidy or whether he’s just conscientious but there’s a part of me that loves seeing his carefulness and attention to detail.

“It’s pretty late and we’ve got an early flight tomorrow morning so we should probably get some sleep,” he says, interrupting the silence between us.

“Yeah, good idea. Thank you for dinner. It was lovely.”

“You’re welcome.” He hesitates for a moment, then walks towards me placing a gentle kiss on my lips. “I’m happy to take the couch tonight if you prefer?” Once again, he leaves the ball in my court.

I swallow, my throat feeling dry all of a sudden. “It’s okay, you can sleep with me.”

Realising how that must have sounded, I clarify, “In the bed, I mean.”

“I knew what you meant, baby.” He smiles.

Theo walks towards the other side of the bed, taking off his shirt and pants, getting into bed in just his boxers.

“I’m gonna get changed, I won’t be long.” I grab the black nightie from the suitcase and get out of my dress in the bathroom. When I walk out, Theo’s sitting up leaning against the headboard, his broad shoulders making the king size bed look small.

I slip into bed next to him, feeling my heartbeat pound in my chest.

It takes all the courage I possess to move closer to him, so our sides are touching and my breast is pressed against his chest.

He inhales sharply, then shifts away onto his side giving me more room, and I pull away in embarrassment, wishing I hadn’t just done that.

Nothing I do sexually ever feels natural or normal to me, and I have no idea what I should be doing or how to read Theo.

Realising my shame, he says, “It’s not that I don’t want to… believe me there’s nothing I want more right now… I just want you to feel comfortable with me, to trust me completely before we take that step. And there’s only so much I can handle when you’re touching me like that.”

He reaches across my face to tuck my hair behind my ear, then rubs my earlobe between his fingers.

“I do trust you, Theo, and as much as I love that you want to wait and be respectful,” I take a deep breath, “That’s not what I want. I haven’t done this before, not because I’ve been holding out for something special or anything, it’s just because I’ve never found anyone who’s wanted to be with me. So if you do… then please just don’t treat me any differently. Just pretend I’m any other girl you met on a night out and brought home with you. I just want to feel normal…for once.”

“I can’t,” he admits.

My heart sinks.

“I can’t just pretend you’re some random hook-up because you’re already so much more than that. If we do this, Imogen, I want you to know this is going to be special. It’s special because you deserve it, and I’m so fucking lucky that I’m the one that’s going to be able to experience this with you.”

I feel myself falling hook, line, and sinker. “You may need to show me how to do this,” I laugh, nervously.

Instead of telling me with words, he shows me with his actions, leaning forward to place a kiss on my lips. My head spins as he dips his tongue inside my mouth, and I feel his hand on my lower stomach.

Keeping our mouths connected, he rides my nightie up till it’s just above my hips. At first, I feel his fingers lightly cross my thigh before moving towards the area that’s never been touched before by someone else.

He pulls away, leaning up on his elbow and staring down into my face.

I feel too raw, too exposed with his eyes on mine like this in such a vulnerable moment. I try to press my lips to his again, but he shakes his head. “No, I want to see this. Watch you come undone for me.”

When he hits a certain spot, my head rolls back and presses into the pillow, my back arching.

Theo’s intense eyes watch me, his breathing short and sharp across my face. When he presses his fingers inside of me, I moan, and he smirks in satisfaction, taking pleasure in watching me come apart at his fingertips.

I can feel his erection throbbing against my leg, and decide to grip it with my hands, wanting to see Theo in the same way he’s seeing me right now.

“Fuck!” he curses, as I try to grip my hand around his length.

I obviously knew it would be hard, but I’m surprised at just how hard it actually feels.

Theo shifts so he’s directly above me and then starts lifting my nightie further up my stomach. Remembering how I reacted last time, he leaves it to just below my breasts then starts pressing his mouth to my belly, travelling lower and lower.

Once again, appreciative that he’s respecting my boundaries, I release him and lift the nightie all the way over my head. Lying beneath him completely naked.

He pauses for a second, comes up to meet my eyes, and just stares. “Perfect,” he whispers, “Everything about you is so fucking perfect.”

At this point the only thing that’s separating us are Theo’s boxers, so I start pulling them down. Reassuring Theo of my consent.

“I’m on the pill,” I blurt out.

He stills for a moment then asks, “Are you sure you still want to do this?”

I don’t answer, just crush my mouth to his in a bruising kiss.

He positions himself at my entrance.

“This might hurt,” he warns, his arms shaking above me.

“I know,” I tease. “I’m not that naïve.”

He doesn’t laugh but I can tell from eyes the comment amused him.

As he pushes himself inside of me, I’m surprised.

Not necessarily by the physical sensation, even though that’s still so new to me, I’m surprised by the intimacy.

I’ve never in my life felt this close to another human being and I can’t help but feel so grateful for the fact that it’s with Theo.

I don’t think there’s anyone else on the planet I would trust enough to feel this vulnerable in front of. There’s absolutely no judgement in his eyes as I fumble my way through a milestone most people experience as a teenager.

Every time my insecurities start to creep in, he’s there to reassure me with kisses, caresses and sweet nothings.

As if I’m his sole focus. The only thing he sees. The only thing that matters to him at this moment…

How could anyone ever doubt themselves when someone’s looking at them like that?

I understand now why people become so obsessed with this. Why almost everything in life is somehow brought back to this moment between two people. Every song, every book, every poem, every movie.

I’d always minimised the value of intimate relationships until this very moment.

Now I don’t know how I’ll survive without his touch.

As Theo starts to move inside of me, I feel pleasure building in my core. Theo’s doing all of the work and yet I feel my limbs grow heavy with fatigue. The strong muscles in his arms and abs tighten with every movement, making the feeling intensify.

All of a sudden, the sensation becomes too intense and overpowering to deny and I feel a wave of pleasure rush over my body, turning my vision hazy.

My body clenches Theo tighter and he finds his own release, cursing in my ear.

He lays down on the bed, tucking me close into his chest which I feel rising and falling beneath me. There’s a thin sheen of sweat covering both of our skin and a sticky mess in between my thighs, but I can’t move.

When we’ve both had a chance to catch our breath, I keep my head on Theo’s chest and hesitantly ask the question I’ve been dying to know. “Did I do it okay? Just be honest.”

Theo laughs softly, then kisses the top of my head. “You just fucking ruined me, and you’re the one to ask if you did it okay? You just sealed your fate, baby. I don’t think I can ever let you go after this.”

Please don’t.

I plant a soft kiss on his bare chest.

“Thank you Theo. You’ll never understand how much that meant to me… That I finally found someone I trust enough to do that with.”

I hear his throat swallow and his arms tighten around me, but he doesn’t reply back.

Wrapped up in each other, we both eventually drift off. Right after I come to the realisation of just how lonely I was before he came into my life.