Courage by Kristen Proby

Chapter 14

~Sam~

“Hey, Sam.”

I smile at the tall blonde behind the glass counter and nod at her husband as he walks out of the back at Cunningham Falls Goldsmiths. There are only a few weeks left until Christmas, and I need to get something special for Natasha.

Something besides the fuzzy slippers and coffee mug that says, I’m a f*cking delight in the morning that I already got her.

“Hey, Kate. Aric. How’s it going?”

“Busy time of year,” Kate says with a grin. “So, no complaints from us.”

“I’m looking forward to January when we can take a little time off,” Aric adds with a wink. “How can we help you today, Sam?”

“I need a present for Tash.” I glance into the glass case and immediately feel overwhelmed. “And I have no idea what that might be.”

“That’s what we’re here for,” Kate says with a wink. “Are you thinking engagement ring?”

I blink at her, feel my cheeks flush, and then shake my head. “Uh, no. No, thanks. You have other things here, right?”

“Yes, don’t panic,” Aric says with a laugh. “Your expression is priceless.”

“I thought you were going to pass out,” Kate says, also giggling. “Okay, let’s look at some things.”

We talk budget and colors. But everything they show me leaves me feeling…meh.

“I know I’m being difficult, and I’m sorry, but I feel like it has to be something extra-special. She’s been through more than her fair share this year, and I want to give her something really great.”

“We can design something,” Aric offers.

“Do we have time for that?” My interest is piqued, but we only have a few weeks.

“I can fit it in. Who needs to sleep, right?” He reaches for a drawing pad and pencil

“You know, I always thought Tash would be gorgeous in emeralds,” Kate suggests. “With her dark coloring and gorgeous skin, they would just be awesome on her.”

“I like that idea,” I say with a nod. “Maybe a necklace?”

“An emerald pendant, but on a longer chain,” Aric says, clearly in the zone. He sketches quickly, his pencil moving in fast, short strokes. “Light yellow gold. Almost champagne in color.”

“Agreed, you don’t want to take away from the stones,” Kate says, watching over Aric’s shoulder.

The other man sets the sketch on the countertop and I blink in surprise.

“Have you ever thought of ditching the goldsmith thing and being an artist?” I ask as I stare down at the gorgeous drawing. “This is amazing. Can I afford it?”

Kate smiles kindly. “Absolutely. He wouldn’t show you if you couldn’t.”

“Then I’m in.”

“Give me two weeks. I’ll call you when it’s done.” Aric shakes my hand. “I guarantee you’ll have it by Christmas Eve.”

“Perfect. Thank you for squeezing it in. Next time, I’ll remember to pop by earlier. I’m still learning.”

“The learning never ends,” Aric replies and waves as I turn to leave.

Now that that’s done, I need to grab the kids each a couple of extra things, and then I’m done. Tash took care of just about everything, and I owe her for that, too.

She’s fucking amazing.

She and the kids are baking cookies and getting ready to decorate the house tonight. I’m in charge of bringing home all the makings for tacos.

And, just because I know she likes it, I’m going to bring home something sweet, too.

I walk down to La Fleur and push through the door.

Beth glances up with a smile. “Sam! Hey there. What are you up to today?”

“Just running some errands. I thought I’d pick up some dessert for later, if you have anything left.”

“I have a chocolate cream pie, huckleberry cobbler, and some lemon huckleberry bread that is to die for. But no pressure.”

“I’ll take the bread for French toast tomorrow, and the chocolate cream pie for tonight.”

“Oh, that’s a really good idea,” she says with a smile. “You could make a huckleberry compote to go on it.”

“Right. I could. If I was Emeril.” I laugh and open my wallet. “What do I owe you?”

“Nothing at all. This is payment for rescuing me off that mountain on Thanksgiving.”

“What were you doing up there, anyway?”

“My parents came to town, and I met them up there for dinner.” She shrugs. “It was kind of awful, and I was in a bad mood and not paying close enough attention to the road. Lesson learned.”

“I’m sorry it was a bad trip for them.”

“Oh, they had a great time.” She bags up the goodies. “I just didn’t see much of them, which is pretty typical. Anyway, have a good evening. Enjoy these.”

“I can guarantee that we will.” I nod and leave the bakery, feeling damn good about my progress this afternoon.

I have to stop at the store but then it’s home for food, cookies, and Christmas decorations.

I would have scoffed at the idea once upon a time. Monica always used to invite me to come over for evenings exactly like this.

And I always came up with a reason not to go.

I should have gone.

If I had it to do over again, I would.

But I can’t do it again. And it’s a waste of time to regret the past.

I’ve just pulled into the parking lot of the grocery store when my phone rings.

“Waters.”

“Hey, Sam, this is Bruce Meyer in Spokane.”

The fire chief. I cut the engine and narrow my eyes. “Hi, Bruce, what can I do for you?”

“Well, I know that I told you to get back to me after the first of the year, but I’m going over the budget for next year and working on some scheduling. The thing is, I need to know in the next few days if we can expect you here in January.”

“I understand.” I sigh and drag my hand down my face. “You’ve been more than fair, Bruce. Can I give you a call in a day or two?”

“That works. I need an answer by Friday, though.”

“Copy that. I’ll talk to you soon.”

I hang up and try to convince myself that the knot in my stomach is just nerves. The job I’ve worked my damn ass off for is waiting for me.

I love my team here in Cunningham Falls, and I’ve grown and learned so much here, but I’ve hit a wall.

If I want to progress and climb the ladder, I need to go to a bigger community.

And Spokane has a good rep, with an excellent chief, and room for advancement.

It’s the right thing to do for my career.

“Then why do I feel like I’m going to toss my cookies?” I mutter and scratch my head in frustration.

Nerves. That’s all it is.

* * *

“It’stime to decorate the tree!” Kelsey dances in the middle of the living room in excitement. “The lights are pretty.”

“I want to put the star on the top,” Kevin announces.

“No, I want to,” Kelsey demands.

“Well, neither of you is tall enough, so I’ll take care of that part,” I interrupt, shutting down an argument before it breaks out.

“Okay, we’re going to have a system here,” Tash says. “We’re not going to just be all willy-nilly about this.”

“Willy-nilly,” Kelsey says with a smirk. “That’s funny.”

“Some of the ornaments are fragile, so we have to be careful,” Tash continues as she opens a box. We have all of the Christmas décor from Monica’s house here. Tash already went through most of it, but I know this won’t be an easy evening for her.

For either of us.

“Aw, look at this.” She holds up two ornaments, one pink and one blue. “Your mom bought these for your first Christmas. She was so excited that year. The holidays were her favorite anyway, but she really wanted to make that first one special for you guys.”

Tash passes the ornaments to the kids.

“Go ahead and put these on the tree.”

We both show the twins how to hang the ornaments from a limb of the fake tree, and then she brings out more.

“This one is Uncle Sam’s.” She passes me the GI Joe ornament with a grin.

“I’ve had this one since I was about your age,” I tell the kids and then fasten it to a limb.

For the next hour, we pull out the special ornaments, one by one, telling the stories attached to them and then adding each to the tree.

“Where are your special ornaments, Auntie Tash?” Kevin asks.

“Oh, I usually just do generic ones,” she says with a smile. “Different pretty colors, that sort of thing.”

“You don’t have special ones from when you were a little girl?” Kelsey asks.

“Not that I know of,” Tash says, and I make a mental note to pick something up for her. “Now, I got two new ornaments for this year.”

She opens a little box and pulls out two clear bulb ornaments hanging from red ribbons.

One says Mom and one says Dad.

“Why are there white feathers inside?” Kelsey asks.

“Because those are angel wings,” Tash replies. “We’ll always hang these on our tree, every year, and we’ll know that your mom and dad are with us, even if they’re gone.”

She passes them to the kids so they can hang them, and I can’t take my eyes off her.

My God, she’s amazing.

Thoughtful.

Loving.

“Do you always know what to do?” I ask her softly as the kids find a spot for the new ornaments on the mostly full tree.

“No.” She blows out a breath. “I feel like I never know what to do. But I think this was the right thing. Monica always bought special ornaments every year. It seemed fitting to get one for this.”

“I couldn’t agree more.” I kiss the top of her head as the kids turn back to us.

“Are we done now?” Kevin asks.

“Yeah, you guys can watch The Grinch while I finish up,” Natasha replies and gets the twins settled for the holiday special.

“What do you have left?”

She looks at me and then laughs. “We literally just decorated the tree. I have to switch out the dishes in the kitchen for the holiday ones. Put up wreaths and garland. I have pretty snowflakes that I found online to put on the wall in the dining room. Your mom made these cute Santa and Mrs. Claus figurines that I want to put on that shelf, but I need to clear it off first. And that’s just the start.”

“And you’re planning to do it all tonight?”

“Most of it,” she confirms. “I don’t have time the rest of the week, and I want to enjoy it for as long as possible. Because the day after Christmas, all of this is coming down.”

“I’ll help.”

“You don’t have to.”

“I have some things to talk to you about anyway. We can knock them both out at the same time.”

“Okay, that works for me.” She fastens the lid on the last ornament box, and I lift them to follow her to the garage. “I thought I had a lot of holiday décor. I’m a novice compared to what Monica had. I don’t know what I’m going to do with it all. I guess I’ll go through everything after the holidays, keep what I love and what is sentimental and donate the rest.”

“You don’t have to do anything right now.”

“I know.” She points to where she wants the empty totes and then to the ones she needs me to grab. “But I can’t keep it all. My house isn’t big enough. It’s even smaller now.”

“Are you thinking about moving?”

She sighs. “Not right away. The kids have had enough upheaval, and I can’t really afford much bigger.”

“Let me help with the freaking rent, and you can.” I cock a brow at her. She hasn’t accepted help from me since I moved in, and it pisses me the hell off. “I live here, too, Tash.”

“I can afford the rent.”

“You aren’t working.”

“I have a lot in savings.” She blows out a breath. “What did you want to talk about?”

More upheaval.

“I got a call today from the fire chief in Spokane.”

She pauses slightly in hanging the wreath on the door but then keeps moving.

“Uh-huh?”

“He needs to know sooner than we thought if and when I’m going out that way.”

She frowns but doesn’t look my way. The knot in my stomach gets tighter than ever.

“And what did you say?”

“That I needed a day or two. I wanted to talk to you.”

“Why me?”

I grab her arms and turn her to look at me. “Why do you think? We’re—”

“We’re what?” Her chin comes up, and she stares at me boldly. “What, Sam?”

“Together,” I reply. “You’re my girlfriend, I guess. Shit, I hate labels, and I don’t know what else to call it. But you’re mine, damn it, and if I take that job, it’ll change things.”

“I won’t be yours if you take the job?”

I scowl and want to punch the fuck out of someone just at the mere thought of that.

“No, that’s not what I mean. It’ll change our day-to-day lives. I’ll be here every other week, but that also means I’ll be gone every other week.”

“This job is what you want,” she says slowly, seeming to turn it all over in her head. “You’ve said so for a couple of years.”

“Yeah.” I prop my hands on my hips. We’re still on the front porch in the cold, where the kids can’t hear us. “Yeah, I want this job.”

“Then I don’t know why we’re having this discussion,” she says, but there’s no anger or censure in the words. “This is your dream, Sam, and I’ll be damned if I stand in the way of that. I’ve known you for most of my life, and I know this is important to you.”

“You’re important to me.”

“And I’ll be here.” She cups my cheek in that way she does that makes my breath catch. “I’m not going anywhere. And neither are the kids. Sam, we can make anything work as long as we have each other. As long as we’re together.”

I yank her to me and kiss her, long and hard, pouring every ounce of the cacophony of emotions bursting through me into the kiss. I don’t want to leave her, but I’m so fucking grateful to her for knowing what I need and saying what I needed to hear.

For her unyielding understanding.

“Thank you,” I murmur as I pull back. I can’t help but press my lips to her soft forehead. “I don’t know what else to say except thank you.”

“You don’t have to thank me,” she says softly. “This is what family does, Sam.”