Hateful by Eden Beck

Chapter Fifteen

“You don’t haveto come with me every time, y’know,” I say, panting myself as I slow near my usual break-tree. There’s less snow beneath us now. The days are already stretching out, warming up.

Heath jogs to a stop near me and grins. “I don’t want the wolves to get you.”

I snort, rolling my eyes. “Sure.”

He plops to the ground as per usual, removing his hat to reveal the red tips of his ears. “What did you think of that math test?”

I shoot him a look. Now we’re doing small talk?

“It was fine.”

“Well, I’m nervous,” he admits, leaning back to peel off his gloves. “I don’t know when we’ll get our grades back. I’m sure you’ll be top of the class again.”

I shake my head with a smile that I can’t stop from spreading across my face. “Don’t make fun of me.”

“I’m not! You’re really smart.” He looks up at me with a sly grin, and I glance away, blushing.

It’s been weeks. He’s still with me on every run. I don’t dislike his company. I think we’re even becoming … friends. Or as much as we can be with the constant reminder of The Brotherhood looming over us.

“Should we head back?” he asks, after a moment.

“Why not press on?” I glance up at the sunny sky. “It’s Saturday. I don’t have anywhere else to be. We haven’t been down that part of the trail, have we?” I point to a part that branches off.

He looks at me with a strange smile, one that lingers around his lips and eyes, as he pushes himself up to stand. “I don’t think we have.”

“Let’s do some exploring, then.”

“Exploring?” he asks suggestively, or at least what I think sounds suggestive, tugging his hat back over his unkempt hair.

“Of the trails,” I say with a laugh, taking off before he can respond and shooting down the branch of the trail I indicated earlier.

“That’s fine!” he yells after me, and I hear his footsteps as he follows behind. “I’ve got a good view back here!”

I laugh again, feeling blood rise to my cheeks. His flirting has gotten sort of … bold. But he’s still given no indication that he suspects that I’m actually a girl.

I actually asked Rafael about it last week, trying to bring it up casually as we got ready for bed. He was barely listening to me right up until I asked if he’d heard of any rumors about Heath possibly being gay.

At that, he was suddenly listening.

Rafael had stopped to think about that, tipping his head to one side. “Well, he’s always seemed pretty flirty. I’ve always thought he was hot, of course,” he’d added nonchalantly, tugging off his shirt and tossing it into his hamper. “But as for him being gay? The flirting is all I’ve heard about. He’s never dated another boy or anything.”

He’d paused then to look at me suspiciously.

“Why?”

“No reason,” I’d said, a little too quickly.

Rafael had pursed his lips into a tight line, but his eyes had shone with amusement.

Now, just a week later, I circle around a bend in the trail, hearing Heath’s heavy footfalls behind me and the huffs and puffs as he tries to keep up, and smile. Rafael might not have had any real insight, but maybe I’ll discover something about Heath myself.

And the way he’s acting, I might discover it today.

Just the thought gives me a heady rush, and this time it is not because of the run.

We wind our way through the trail just to discover that it loops back into the main trail just a bit further down from our break tree. We both pause beneath it again. Heath almost collapses to the ground while I lean against the tree, breathing hard, enjoying the ache in my calves.

“Look,” he says grimly after a few moments of silence. I look over. He points out some paw prints in the snow. “Wolves.”

“Could be anything,” I say dismissively, but my stomach does a little flutter at the sight of the massive prints.

Heath is still looking, too. “Maybe we should keep going.”

“Yeah right.” I glance over at him, looking at the way his chest heaves with each breath. “You need to catch your breath.”

“I also need to not be eaten by wolves.”

“I don’t think wolves attack people,” I reply, but there isn’t much certainty in my voice. I guess I’m not really sure. I don’t know much about wolves. “Not anymore, anyway,” I add, thought I don’t think it reassures either of us.

We head back down the trail sooner than either of us is really ready. I see more pawprints along the edges of it as we run, prints that weren’t there on our way up. Heath and I share a couple glances but we don’t say anything.

No need to spook ourselves. If we just keep moving, we should be fine.

We get to the first bend outside the woods and Heath jogs to a stop as usual.

“See you tomorrow if it doesn’t rain?” he asks hopefully.

“Sure thing.” I grin at him. Even if he doesn’t want to be seen with me, I’ve grown to appreciate the company.

* * *

Heath isn’tthe only one suddenly worried about grades now that the spring semester is in full swing.

“We’re getting our math tests back today,” Rafael says with a groan.

Beside him, I shrug and fiddle with the lapel of my jacket. “So? That test was easy.”

“Easy? I guessed half the answers!”

“Hope you guessed C, because most of the answers were C.”

Rafael sighs. “I guessed B most of the time.”

“Rookie mistake.”

He gently pushes his fist into my shoulder with mock annoyance. I grin up at him as we cross the threshold into our math classroom.

We have to pass by The Brotherhoods’ desks, of course. For a moment I let my eyes skip over Jasper, who’s trying to catch my gaze, and Beck, who stares at me with a manic grin, to land on Heath.

Heath’s eyes shoot up to mine and the corner of his mouth twitches upwards. He looks quickly back down at his notebook before surreptitiously sliding a folded piece of paper to the outside edge of his desk.

Once he sees me looking, he flicks the paper beneath his neighbor’s desk so it goes skidding across the floor. I’m out of The Brotherhood’s line of sight when I bend to retrieve it.

“The hell was that?” Rafael whispers in my year as we sit down.

“A note.” I start unfolding the paper.

“Yeah, but from Heath? Why?”

“Shh!” I hiss impatiently. The paper is small and it’s been folded many times. I unwrap it and smooth out the wrinkles, though I don’t need to; in the exact center it says very simply in big, hastily done handwriting, Another run today?

Rafael watches nosily over my shoulder as I grab my pencil and scribble down what time I’m planning on being on the trail.

“So you two plan these out now, do you?” Rafael asks as I start meticulously folding the paper again.

“Sometimes,” I reply defensively.

“Somebody has a crush.”

I turn my head away so he won’t see me blush—only to meet Heath’s gaze. He gives me a smile and the blush deepens. I flash the folded note before putting it quickly into my pocket, and he nods.

“Good afternoon, class,” the professor sighs as he breezes into the room with a stack of papers. “I’ve graded all your tests. Not all of you will be happy with them, I’m sure. Alex, however,” he adds, glancing my direction, “should be very happy with his grade.”

I feel even more heat rise to my cheeks as I sink down into my chair. People have turned to look at me now. Beck’s wide eyes find me. He glares daggers sharper than his cheekbones.

I know the professor means well, but he’s just painted a target in the middle of my chest.

The professor goes around with the stack of papers, talking about how he’s not happy with the grades in general, and hands them back to their owners. I hear a lot of groans and a few quiet celebrations. A few rows ahead of me, two guys fist bump each other when they compare grades.

But that doesn’t draw Beck’s eyes from where they’ve taken up residence on the back of my head.

When the professor arrives at my desk, he sets my test paper facedown. “Good work,” he says quietly before moving on.

I turn it over. I only missed a few questions. I can’t help but grin. When The Brotherhood leaves me alone, I really do some good work.

Or, it seems, even when they only mostly leave me alone.

“I obviously haven’t gone over the material well enough,” the professor says as he takes to the front again. “So today we’ll review. Alex, I’m sure you’ll be extremely bored, but try to pay attention anyway. Maybe one of your classmates could copy your notes.”

I shrink into my seat again as the class turns to look at me. Beck looks like he has murderous intent. I can’t say I’m surprised about that. I try to avoid his gaze, and also to not think about how he might try to get me back after class.

The thought chafes at me. I didn’t even do anything this time. I just studied.

I literally just studied.

It’s not fair that I continually get singled out for this stupid shit.

I put my head down on my desk for the remainder of class, too nervous to try to pay attention to the lesson, which is stuff I already know anyway. The professor doesn’t try to rouse me from my anxiety-induced stupor. I hear him talking, going over the concepts I’ve already memorized.

The bell rings and Rafael shakes my shoulder, but he doesn’t need to. I’m not asleep, just avoiding the inevitable that is sure now to be coming. I gather my things together nervously. Not one of The Brotherhood has gotten up from their desks. I stall as much as I can, but they don’t seem to be moving.

“Let’s go,” Rafael sighs, grabbing me by the handle of my backpack. I reluctantly allow him to drag me toward the classroom door. It’s incredibly unfortunate that I have to pass by The Brotherhood’s little part of the classroom, but I’m sure they sat there just for that purpose.

“Hey,” Beck snaps, shooting to his feet as we go by.

Rafael continues to tug on me, but Beck reaches out and grabs me by the arm. Rafael freezes. He’s brave, sure, but not brave enough to fight Beck.

Beck stretches himself to his full height, over six feet. His hands seem huge. He easily wraps his fingers around my entire forearm.

“You think you can just embarrass us like that?” he snaps at me.

“Yeah,” Heath says from behind Beck, stacking his books into a neat pile. “How dare you study harder than us?”

Even as he says it, he flashes me a grin.

I blink and my eyes flick to Beck, who turns to glare at Heath over his shoulder.

“Bet you liked all the attention that got you, didn’t you?” Jasper growls.

“You could really tell he did,” Heath agrees. “It was super obvious. The way he turned super red and then tried to make himself as small as possible? Classic attention-seeking moves.”

I bring my other hand up to my mouth to try to stifle a giggle. God damnit Heath. Beck’s so confused at Heath’s tone that he loosens his grip on my arm, and I slide out and dart out the doorway with Rafael following behind.

But not before I manage to flick the folded note to the floor at Heath’s feet.

“Now I know someone has a crush,” Rafael says with a sideways glance. I look away.

“I don’t know what you mean.”

“Oh, come on. Not just you, either—Heath.”

“What?” I look over my shoulder. Though Jasper and Beck are already grumpily exiting the classroom. Heath lags behind. His eyes scan the crowd before he finds me in it. He lifts the note up and grins before turning to rush after the other two.

“Look, Alex,” Rafael says sagely, still yanking me by the handle on my backpack, “I know gay shit when I see it. And that was some seriously gay shit.”

“So you don’t think he suspects—” I begin, but he cuts me off.

“Nope. That boy totally believes that you’re also a boy.” He pats me on the back. “Make of that what you will.”

As if any of this was really ever up to me.