On His Knees by Tabatha Kiss
Chapter 21
Jenna
Itap my heel against the floor of the elevator, eagerly watching the numbers flash as it slowly climbs to the third floor. This stupid elevator is so slow. I always forget. But in my defense, I’m very, very distracted today.
Seth Newbury.
Man of mystery? That’s giving him too much credit.
Man of intrigue? Not quite that, either.
But he’s definitely interesting, that’s for sure. Not that I’m interested, of course. I’m just…
Fuck, I don’t know, but last night was strange and I need to talk to someone about it who isn’t his sister.
The elevator stops with a ding. I step off before the door is fully open, beelining toward Wilder and Corey’s condo. I knock twice, praying he hasn’t spirited her off somewhere, as he often does. How a bum like him manages that, I do not know, but—
Focus, Jenna.
I raise my fist to knock again, but the door opens on Corey.
“Jenna,” he says, bobbing his head in greeting.
“Hey, Corey. Is Wilder here?”
“Sure.” He steps back to let me inside. “Yo, Jenna’s here.”
“Jenna?”
I step inside, following the sound of her voice toward the couch. She tilts her head in surprise as she leans forward and places her coffee mug down.
“Wilder,” I say as I approach, “something really weird happened last night with Seth.”
Corey snorts. “What, you doing couples counseling now?”
I twist toward him. “Couples counseling?” I repeat.
“Seth just left here like ten minutes ago.”
“He did?”
“Yeah.”
“What’d he say?”
He shrugs. “I dunno.”
I spin back to Wilder. “What’d he say?”
“Okay.” Wilder holds up her hands. “Let’s all just… chill out. All right?”
“I’m chill,” I say, very much not chill. “I’m very chill. What did, uh… what’d he say?”
“Seth came to me with a personal issue. And no—” she says as I open my mouth, “I will not tell you what it is. It’d be a betrayal of his trust.”
“Was it about me?”
“No. You didn’t come up.”
I deflate, somewhat disappointed. “I didn’t?”
She shrugs a shoulder. “Nope.”
“Was it about Heidi?”
“No.”
“Drew?”
“No, Jenna.” She glares at me. “I will not tell you!”
“Was it about the fire at his place?”
Wilder snaps her mouth shut.
That’s a yes.
“It was, wasn’t it?” I ask.
“Mm-m,” she hums, shaking her head.
“No, it’s okay! He talked to me about it, too, so we can totally talk about it together because if I know it already and you know it already, then you didn’t actually tell me anything, right?”
Wilder exhales. “That’s… a loophole, I suppose.”
“So, what did he say?”
“No.” She wags a finger. “You tell me what he said to you and I’ll cross reference it with what he said to me.”
“Fair enough.” I plop onto the couch beside her and take a breath. “He…”
I glance at Corey standing over us with one hand propped beneath his chin.
“Oh, don’t mind me,” he says. “Go on.”
Wilder smiles. “Corey…”
He sighs. “Fiiine,” he says, shifting his feet. “I’ll just go… hang out in the bedroom.”
“Thank you,” she says, her voice low and sweet.
I wait as he slowly shuffles across the room and closes the door behind him.
“So, you two fuck or what?” Wilder asks.
“Ew.” I recoil. “No! Of course not. It wasn’t anything like that.”
“Then what happened?”
I picture him in my mind; a dark and lonely man on our porch. “He said something about smoke,” I recall. “That he could still smell it on him from the fire and that he… he didn’t want to be alone. Everyone was leaving him, and he didn’t want to be alone. I thought he was just rambling drunk, but he didn’t seem like Seth, you know?”
“Is that why you let him stay?”
I nod. “Yeah. He looked so scared. And upset. It really… I don’t know. It really messed me up a little. I’ve never seen him like that before.”
Wilder nods, staying quiet.
“And then…” I pause, wondering if I should even say more. “So, you guys left. And then, everyone else left. I cleaned up the house, then I went into Heidi’s room to check and make sure Seth was okay and, of course, Corey had just dumped him there with his clothes and shoes on.”
Wilder rolls her eyes. “Of course.”
“So, I made him comfortable and then—”
“Comfortable?” she asks over me. “Comfortable how?”
“Well, I…” I blush. I fucking blush. “I took his shoes off. And… his pants.”
“You took his pants off?”
“He wears very tight jeans!” I say. “I thought they looked restrictive.”
Wilder smirks. “Was his shirt restrictive as well?”
I hesitate. “Yes.”
She hums, amused.
“Anyway…”I say, continuing. “I made him comfortable. I rolled him over and gave him some water and then I left.”
“Did he say anything else about the fire?” she asks.
I shake my head. “No, he was really out of it. I don’t even know if he remembers telling me about it at all. He didn’t even look at me today when he left. He just bolted.”
Wilder tilts her head. “Do you want him to remember?”
I pause.
Do I want Seth to remember his drunken admission?
Do I want Seth to know that I know how he really feels about his best friend’s success?
Do I want the two of us to have this one moment in time when we weren’t truly awful to each other?
“Yes,” I answer.
Wilder shifts slightly and hums to herself again.
“Hmmwhat?” I ask, eager for advice.
“Would you say…” She pauses, biting her lip. “Would you say that you made him feel safe?”
“Safe?”
“Yes or no,” she says. “Gut response. Last night, did you make Seth Newbury feel safe?”
I furrow my brow, confused by the question. “Yeah,” I say with a shrug. “I guess so.”
“Okay.” Wilder exhales hard. “Jenna…”
“Yes?”
“You need to talk to Seth.”
“Why?”
“Just…” Her lips press together. “Do it. Go home and talk to Seth.”
“I don’t know. I’d be too weird.”
“Jenna.”She places her hand on my knee. “There is nothing in this world that would help this situation more right now than you and Seth sitting down together and having a real, genuine, adult conversation about this topic.”
I raise a brow. “Why?”
“Just trust me.” She squeezes my knee. “The sooner the better.”
“Okay, but… why?”
“Just do it,”she says. “Rip out those boundaries and just talk to him. All right?”
I recoil slightly from her serious expression. “All right. I will.”
“Good.” Another tap of my knee and she sits back. “Good.”
Seth. Talk to Seth.
Have a real, genuine, adult conversation with… Seth Newbury.
How the fuck am I supposed to do that?