On His Knees by Tabatha Kiss

Chapter 4

Seth

Why did I do that?

Of all the things I could have said, of all the ways that conversation could have gone, I went and said... that?

I propositioned my little sister’s best friend for sex.

I glance into the rearview mirror again as we make our way through the far-too-early morning Chicago traffic. Jenna snoozes in the backseat of my truck with her head limply resting on the window. Usually, we’d all crash at the beach house and roll out whenever we’re sober, but Drew and Heidi have a flight to catch in a few short hours. Knowing my baby sister, she’ll want to triple check her travel itinerary again. And then again.

I check on her in the backseat next to Jenna. She’s awake and smiling, no doubt thinking more about her dream vacation. At least someone’s happy today.

I propositioned my little sister’s best friend for sex.

It was the beer. Yeah, the beer. It had to be because there is no way I’d ever consider sleeping with Jenna Abrams sober.

Is she attractive? Objectively so.

Is her reputation in the sack a tad bit better than I let on earlier? Baby, she’s a firework.

But would I actually sleep with her?

Hell to the fucking no.

She’s Jenna, for Christ’s sake.

Annoying, entitled little brat Jenna.

Maybe she’ll just... let it slide. Maybe we can both silently agree to never mention it again. Move on. Forget it ever happened. Yeah, that’s what I’ll do, and if she ever brings it up, I’ll play dumb.

I nod, happy with the new plan as I turn my truck onto Shanty Row, the grungy yet fun street Heidi and Jenna rent a house on.

“Jenna?” Heidi taps her knee, waking her. “We’re home.”

Jenna raises her head, silently nods, and sits up, clearly still drunk and needing to go right back to sleep.

She makes eye contact with me in the mirror for a split second before looking away with annoyance.

Nope. Not awkward at all.

I park on the street in front of their house. Drew opens the passenger side and steps down, pushing his seat forward to let the girls climb out. He offers his hand to Heidi. She takes it with a smile.

What a goddamn gentleman.

“Bye, little sister,” I say. “Have fun in Europe.”

“I will!” she says as her feet touch the ground. “Love you, big brother.”

“Love you, too.”

Jenna slides across the seat and takes Drew’s hand. He helps her down, and she mumbles a thank you.

“Bye, Jenna!” I say.

Jenna doesn’t respond. She starts toward the house, sloppily searching for her keys in her purse as she hobbles across the grass.

“I’ll be right in, Heidi,” Drew says to her. “I need to talk to your brother.”

Crap.

“All right.” Heidi pushes up onto her toes and kisses his cheek, still smiling wide with excitement as she gives me a final wave. “Bye, Seth.”

I wave back, our eye contact broken by Drew as he hops back up into the truck. He slams the door and waits for her to disappear into the house before snapping his head in my direction.

I raise a finger. “Hey, man, I tried.”

Drew says nothing. He just glares.

“Heidi’s fine! Vacation saved!” I say, gesturing toward the house. “Look at that smile. I’ve never seen her so happy in my life.”

He exhales through his nose. Loudly.

“This wasn’t my fault!” I add. “I apologized, just like you told me to. I was sincere and—”

“And called her a hag?”

I pause with my mouth open. “Sincerely.”

He sighs, ending with a laugh. “Seth, how does a man of your experience know so little about women?”

“I know the important stuff.”

“Are you sure about that?”

“No.” I shake my head, defeated. “How do women hold on to grudges for so long? I mean, you and I have had some bumps in our road, but we got over those, right?”

“Right.”

“And look at me and Heidi! I pulled some, admittedly, messed up pranks on her in our youth, but she forgave me for those.”

“Mostly.”

“Mostly?” I repeat. “What do you mean, mostly?”

“I mean, there are a few things she’s mentioned that still bother her and, for the sake of keeping the peace between the three of us, I’ve chosen to file those away under stupid teenage Seth behavior and not things I should punish you for — assuming I never have to choose sides. In which case, I will destroy you.”

I tilt my head. He has a point. “And I thank you for that. Love you, brother.”

“Love you, too. What did you do to Jenna that she’s still hanging onto now?”

“I don’t know.”

He arches a brow.

“Really, I don’t know!” I say.

“Well, there must have been something.”

I pause to think, but…

“What didn’t I do to her?” I say. “She was such a… an easy target, you know? Fancy judge mom. Heart surgeon dad. I felt like it was my duty to knock the little princess down a few notches. It sounds horrible to say now, but that’s how I used to think back then. And I have no excuse. I was a dumb kid. I was angry all the time. My home life was a mess, but I never went hungry. I always had clean clothes and a roof over my head. I had no reason to be the asshole I was other than it made me laugh to see other people in pain instead of wallowing in my own.” I blink. “I need therapy, don’t I?”

Drew nods. “A little bit.”

“I’ll look into it.”

“Honestly, it sounds like you already know what you should do next.”

“Apologize to Jenna,” I say. “Again. Until she forgives me.”

“No.”

“No?”

“No.”He shakes his head. “Jenna has already made it clear to you she wants nothing to do with you or any apology you have.”

“So, what do I do?”

“Nothing,” he says. “You do nothing. You let her go. You let her move on with her life.”

“But then nothing gets resolved.”

“Some things can’t be resolved,” he says. “Seriously, Seth. Let her go. If she were going to forgive you, she would have. Don’t make this worse — especially not while I’m out of the country.”

Drew opens the door and hops down to the curb.

“Don’t start shit until you’re back home,” I joke. “Got it.”

“Or, you know, never,” he says, turning back with a smile. “I’m down for never, too.”

“I promise nothing. Hey, take care of my sister, all right.”

“I will.”

“I mean it!” I point a stiff, big brotherly finger. “Do not let her out of your sight! It is a foreign land full of junk and knickknacks.”

He laughs as he closes the door and looks at me through the open window. “She’s checking an entire empty suitcase just for souvenirs. She will fill it whether I’m watching or not.”

“Can’t be helped, I suppose.” I bow my head. “Be safe, brother.”

Drew raises a fist. “Delta Xi,” he says, our unending battle cry.

I raise mine. “Delta Xi.”