Finding Ronan’s Heart by Melanie Moreland
Chapter Three
Beth
Ronan disappeared around the corner. I absently wiped the tabletop, watching his long strides as he moved away, a strange ache in my chest when I could no longer see him.
He’d caught my attention the moment he entered the diner. I was sure he caused that reaction most places he went since he definitely stood out in the crowd. He was tall and broad. Massive. His shoulders were wide, his arms thick, sinewy and strong. I was fascinated by the way his forearms rippled with muscles as he moved them. He used his hands a lot when talking, drawing my eyes to the sexy gestures.
When I approached his table, I wasn’t sure what to expect. I had seen him come from the gym, and I assumed he was one of the many trainers who worked there. He certainly looked like one. Quite often, the staff at the gym ordered a salad or the protein plate to go. They rarely engaged much if they ate in. One had pushed me constantly about becoming a member, only stopping when I informed him there was no way I could afford their fees. He had paid his bill and left after that, and I hadn’t seen him again.
Ronan’s voice surprised me. It was surprisingly low, rich, and deep. He spoke softly, although his words were clear and easy to hear. But when he laughed, the sound boomed. I had a feeling he laughed a lot at times from the crinkles around his beautiful green eyes. Bright and warm, they were set off by long lashes under thick eyebrows that suited his masculine face. His nose was long and straight, his wavy hair a deep brown that brushed the back of his shirt. Scruff showed off his expansive jaw. His smile was wide and friendly.
I also noticed a trace of sadness in his eyes, even when he smiled. But he was polite and charming. His order surprised me. I liked how he responded to my teasing. The massive amount of food he inhaled wasn’t what I expected, but then again, I had a feeling nothing Ronan did was the norm.
He ate slowly, cleaning off every plate I had brought him. I’d made sure to add lots of extras to the salad and that his burger was hot and had extra pickles when he mentioned he loved them. I cut his piece of hummingbird cake larger than normal, hoping he would enjoy it.
The way he polished off the cake, there was no doubt he did.
I couldn’t begin to describe the way it felt when he appeared beside me, telling off the asshole and making sure I was okay. I was used to taking care of myself. I had to. I knew enough moves, I could have brought the idiot to his knees in a few seconds, but having Ronan stand up for me left a warmth in my chest. The way he’d tucked me behind him, ready to defend, made me feel special and…protected. Safe.
I wasn’t used to feeling either of those.
I sighed as I wiped down the table and replaced the condiment holder.
The feeling had faded when he left. He never asked for my number. I was sure he was going to, and for the first time in years, I hoped to be asked. Every time I had looked his way, our eyes had connected. He seemed to find excuses to call me to his table. He asked questions so that I lingered. More than once, I thought I had felt something pass between us.
But he left. I had obviously mistaken the signs—he was just a nice guy who had flirting down to a science. With those killer eyes and muscles that went on for miles, it would make more sense.
I doubted a short, curvy, overworked waitress was his style. I imagined he dated tall, voluptuous blondes who looked perfect, even while working out. Maybe he’d been watching me so closely, mentally tabulating the ways he could improve my figure.
I flipped the lock closed and pulled down the blinds, grateful this part of the night was over. I rolled my tired shoulders. I had one more job to do, and then I could head home.
I headed to the kitchen, anxious to be done.
* * *
It was past one when I let myself into the house, my breathing easier once I shut the door behind me. It was a short walk from the bus to the little house, but at this time of night, I always felt relieved when I stepped in the relative safety of the door.
I hung up my coat, slipping off my sneakers and rubbing my feet, wondering if I could stay awake long enough to soak them for a bit.
I rounded the corner, surprised to find Paige awake, flipping through a magazine.
“Everything okay?” I asked anxiously.
She waved her hand. “Yes. Everything is fine. Couldn’t sleep, is all.” She lifted her arms over her head, stretching. “How was work?”
I flung myself on the sofa. “Fine, aside from a jerk-off with wandering hands.”
“Ugh. Did you use your moves?”
I chuckled. “The second time, yes. The first time, a customer stepped in and told him off.”
“That was nice, but apparently he didn’t listen.”
I yawned. “Nope—his ego was too big to hear a word. So, when he tried again, I bent his fingers back.”
She grinned. “Did he squeal?”
“Like a little girl.” I laughed. “With ribbons in her hair.”
She high-fived me. “That’s what I’m talking about.”
I indicated the hall. “They okay?”
“Yes,” she assured me. “They played some video game for a while, and Lucy fell asleep. Evan did some homework and went to bed by ten.” Her voice was tender. “He is so patient with her, showing her the controls—I think he let her win just to make her happy.”
“He’s a good kid. They both are.”
She leaned over and squeezed my hand. “We’re lucky to have you.”
I squeezed her palm back. “We’re lucky to have you.”
“You need to get some sleep. You have an early class tomorrow.”
“I know.” I stood. “I’ll check on Evan and head to bed. I’ll peek in on Lucy too.”
“Thanks.”
I headed down the hall, stopping at Lucy’s room. She was asleep, surrounded by pillows and stuffed animals. Her long dark hair was tied up in a ponytail, and she was adorable, clutching her favorite bear. The blankets, as usual, were flung off, and I tucked them back around her, making sure she was warm, even though I knew she’d fling them off again soon enough.
In Evan’s room, I watched him sleep for a few moments, his deep, even breathing helping me to relax. As usual, his room was neat and orderly—exactly the way he liked it. One of his crutches had fallen over, and I placed it upright next to the other one, my smile fading as I did.
I wished he didn’t need them. I wished I could go back to two years ago and change what happened. But that was impossible.
Instead, I bent and tenderly brushed away the hair that fell over his forehead. “Sleep well, kiddo. I love you.”
Then I headed downstairs to bed, somehow feeling the weight of my responsibilities even stronger than usual.
That night, I dreamed of warm green eyes and dimples. Strong arms and a smile so wide it made my heart soar.
But when I woke up, I was alone—and somehow, I felt the pain of that more than I had ever experienced before now.
* * *
Ronan
I punched at the bag, ducking and weaving to avoid bounce back, hitting it hard. Sweat poured down my back, and my shoulders began to ache from the strain.
“What has the bag done to you lately, son?” my dad drawled as he walked into the gym we had set up in the building.
I stepped back, stilling the motion of the bag, and grinned. “It was looking at me funny.”
He chuckled, rolling his shoulders. “Wanna spar with your old man, instead?”
I tapped my gloves together. “Bring it on.”
His laughter filled the room as he picked up a set of gloves, using his teeth to pull on the second one. He wore a pair of workout pants and a tight shirt, showing off his still-impressive physique. He had always been into fitness and had spent hours with us as kids sharing his passion. He was patient and knowledgeable and made sure we knew how to look after ourselves. He taught us all self-defense, including my sister, Ava, who now held a black belt in karate. No one messed with my elder sister—and she wasn’t above using one of her stellar moves on us if we pissed her off.
For the next twenty minutes, the room was filled with nothing but trash talk, the squeak of our footwear on the mats, and grunts as we advanced and retreated, jabbing punches and uppercuts, and generally enjoying ourselves. I loved sparring with him, learning as he quietly corrected my form, laughing as he pretended to be insulted when I would “land” a punch, chuckling at his insults.
We tapped gloves, tore them off, and both drank deeply from cups we filled at the water cooler. We sank to the floor, our backs resting against the cool cement walls.
“Working out your frustration?” he asked.
“Just letting off some steam.” I patted my face with the towel.
“Wanna talk about it?”
I tilted my head to the side, meeting his gaze. “Talk about what?” I asked, wondering who had asked him to come see me.
“Whatever is bothering you.”
“I don’t recall saying anything was.”
“Your mother noticed you were quiet at dinner on the weekend. Your brothers are worried about you.”
“No need for them to be worried,” I stated mildly. “I’m fine.”
“They think you’re upset over their new girlfriends.”
I swallowed a long drink of water. “They’re wrong. I went to dinner with them last night. I liked both Diane and Kim. They seem very happy.”
“And you’re on your own.”
“Dad, it’s not the first or the last time. We all have our own lives. You and Mom made sure of that. I’m a little preoccupied with all the problems the ABC build is having. Finishing all the details for the hotel. Going back and forth between here and Port Albany.”
“How do you feel about your brothers thinking about not moving?”
“I wasn’t surprised when they told me about meeting the girls. It makes sense they want to stay closer for the moment. And they’ve never wanted to live in Port Albany the way I have.”
“What about you?”
“I still plan on moving out that way permanently—especially once the building is done and we start concentrating on the whole southwest area of the province.”
“No one holding you here?” he asked.
I sighed. “No, Dad. You know there isn’t. And there won’t be,” I added, even as a set of dark eyes and wild curls flitted through my mind. I hadn’t been back to the diner since last week. I had been tempted but resisted.
“She was an anomaly, Ronan.” He paused, frustrated. “I wish you’d tell us what happened. Maybe it would help.”
“Doesn’t matter. It’s in the past, and I’m over it. I don’t plan on letting it happen again.” I shoved off the wall and extended my hand to my dad. He grabbed it and pulled himself up, laughing as his knee cracked.
“Jeez, I’m getting old.”
I clapped him on the shoulder. “Never. Just a little stiff.”
“That’s what your mother said last night.”
“Oh God, no. Don’t even start that,” I groaned. “No sex stuff about you and Mom.”
He waggled his eyebrows. “She still can’t get enough of me.”
“Whatever.”
He suddenly became serious. “Ronan, I know you feel lost in the shuffle sometimes. Part of a group. But I also know you’re different. You hide it, but your mother and I know.”
“You’re probably the only ones who do,” I couldn’t help but say.
“You’re the protector, the worrier. Your brothers know it too. They love you, and whether you like it or not, the three of you share an incredibly strong bond. You have from the moment you were born. We couldn’t separate you for the longest time. Growing up, you all stayed together. You finished one another’s sentences. You felt one another’s pain. But you felt theirs even more. Even apart, you were together. You can’t ignore that connection.”
“I’m not trying to. But our lives will veer away from one another, Dad. They have to. It won’t sever the connection, but we each have to find our own happiness. Our own path. Not every part of our lives can involve the others.” I lifted my shoulders. “And we all have to cope with that in a different way. They each found a girl they’re interested in. The fact that they’re twins is just a fluke. But their lives remain on the same track, and right now, mine is on a different path. We’ll come back together. We always will. But I need to step back a little and let them do this without me.”
He shook his head. “I’m still worried. You’re spending a lot of time alone.”
I barked out a laugh. “I’m with them every day. Addi is there. Gracie. Ava. Reed and Heather. Theo now, too. I’m surrounded all day. We had dinner on the weekend, and I saw them last night. I’m hardly alone.”
He met my gaze with a serious one. “You can be alone in a room full of people, Ronan. I know that all too well.”
“Dad, honest, I’m fine. I’m thrilled for Paul and Jeremy, and I liked the girls. I know they’re planning on bringing them out to meet you and Mom soon too.”
“Will you be there when they do?”
“Yes,” I assured him. “I will.”
“You need to find your happiness too, Ronan.”
“I know that. But you can’t expect my schedule to be the same as theirs. We’re not that similar.”
He rubbed his chin. “That’s it, isn’t it? The three of you have always been so synced. Now, life is changing for you in a big way. They’re going in one direction, you’re in another.”
“We’re still close. Them falling in love isn’t going to change that. My time will come,” I added, trying to sound positive for my dad.
“Yes, it will,” he agreed. “You’ll find your heart. I found your mother, and she changed my life.”
I couldn’t help the grin that crossed my face. “Mom says she found you, and you fought her tooth and nail.”
He laughed. “She’s right. I was stupid. But once I got my head out of my ass, I held on tight. You’ll find a girl you feel that way about. I promise.”
“We’ll see what happens.”
He studied me, obviously deciding he’d lectured me enough. “Okay, I’ll drop it for now. But your mother is going to check on you a lot. Be warned.”
“Does that mean she’ll send food?”
He frowned. “I suppose.”
I hooked an arm around his neck, dragging him in for a hug. “Thanks, old man. I know you hate sharing.”
He wrapped his arms around me, holding me tight. For a moment, I let myself draw from his strength. Dad had always been demonstrative with us. With our mom. With the entire extended family. He gave great hugs, and sometimes I thought it was because he needed to feel them as much as he needed to give them. I hugged him back tight.
“Thanks, Dad.”
He stepped back. “Anytime. I’m always here, Ronan.”
I smiled and squeezed his shoulder. “I know.”
He picked up his bag and left, waving at me. I watched him go with a sigh. I hadn’t exactly lied when I told him I was fine, but the truth was, I was feeling off-kilter. I slid down the wall, sipping at my water.
He was right. I was missing my brothers. Even when our lives took us in different directions, we were somehow connected. There was an unbreakable bond between us being triplets. Even when we’d been with our own groups of friends, girlfriends, and internships, somehow we were still together. We knew one another better than anyone. We were so close, we sensed how the others were feeling at times. It was a bond we couldn’t explain and we didn’t try because, for us, it was simply part of being a triplet. We’d all gone to university together, and although we’d done our internships at different companies, we had still been connected on a daily basis. We even shared a condo until we decided it was time to live on our own once we graduated. But now, for the first time, our paths felt as if they were traveling in separate lanes rather than crisscrossing over one another. It was an odd sensation.
I thought of growing up. Even our careers were similar. We shared a deep love for architecture, although in different ways. I preferred commercial architecture, Paul concentrated on sustainable/green architecture, and Jeremy was the interior space expert. Together, we were one hell of a team. In fact, the entire Callaghan clan, aside from my mom, was involved in the BAM/ABC empire in some way.
Our elder brother, Liam, loved the outdoors. He had been into plants and gardens for as long as I could remember. My earliest memory of him was being with him outside as he dug and weeded a vegetable garden, fussing with his plants, showing me how to water them properly. He became a horticulturist and operated his own company. He did a lot of work for BAM and ABC as well as many other companies, and his services were in high demand all the time.
Our sister, Ava, worked at ABC, functioning as the liaison for all the projects we took on. I didn’t know another person as organized or meticulous with paperwork and keeping all the pieces of the puzzles together and running smoothly. Our adopted grandfather, Jordan Hayes, had held that position at BAM and insisted Ava learned everything she knew from him and had surpassed him ten times over. We were lucky to have her.
But the truth was, the three of us were the closest. Even when I had been seeing Loni, we remained so. After our nasty breakup, I had fallen into the habit of being alone. Licking my wounds in private. And even after I moved past the trauma, I had never felt quite the same. She had left a scar on me that hadn’t healed properly. My brothers had been their usual understanding selves, never pushing me, but they had also moved forward with their own lives. And this time, it felt as if the separation was the start of something bigger. Something lonelier for me.
Last night, I had dinner with them and their twin girlfriends. Kim and Diane were like us in that they were similar in looks, but not identical. Kim’s hair was a light brown, while Diane’s was a deep mahogany. Both had blue eyes. They were tall, slender, and pretty. Intelligent and well-spoken. Easygoing. They suited my brothers well. Diane was quieter, which suited Paul’s outgoing personality. Kim radiated exuberance and chatted constantly, Jeremy encouraging her with his wit and his ability to talk on a vast array of subjects. It was easy to see the four of them were comfortable with one another.
“What grade do you teach?” I asked Kim.
She smiled as she replied. “Grade one.”
“I bet that keeps you busy.”
“All the time. I love kids, and I enjoy being with them. They’re open and honest, you know? Their reactions are real.” She paused with a laugh. “Sometimes too real, but it keeps the days interesting.”
Remembering what a handful we were in school, I could only imagine.
“Any twins or triplets in your class?”
“Not this year. I had a set of twins two years ago. They were identical. Inseparable. Luckily, their mother dressed them differently, or I would have been lost.”
“We used to switch outfits.” Paul chuckled. “We’d be one another some days just for fun.”
“I’m sure the girls did that a few times,” Kim agreed. “But you’re not identical?”
“We looked pretty similar when we were younger,” I explained. “Then I got better-looking than these two clowns.” I winked.
“Bigger, you mean,” Jeremy scoffed. “We all know I’m the best-looking one. The looks improved as we came out. Longer baking time.”
It was my turn to laugh. “Yeah, those six minutes made a big difference.”
He nodded. “I knew you would agree.”
We all laughed. Kim hugged his arm and whispered something to him, which made him grin and turn his head, kissing her hard.
I felt that odd pang in my chest again watching them.
Kim looked flushed as she met my eyes. “Jeremy says you’re the driving force of the design team.”
I shrugged. “We all bring something to the table.”
“Paul says the same thing,” Diane offered quietly. “He says your talent astounds him.”
I looked down, fiddling with my fork. It was rare I heard what my brothers thought about me from someone else. We supported one another and fed off the artistic vibe when working, but they rarely offered simple praise.
I picked up my drink, striving to keep the mood upbeat. “I am pretty awesome.”
That led to more teasing. The meals were served, and the conversation was light. They had a lot of “couple banter” between them, and at times, I felt very much the odd man out, watching their closeness from the outside. I wasn’t part of the inside jokes or the memory of that great sushi place they’d been to the week before. I couldn’t laugh as loud over the story of how Paul had tripped over his untied shoelace in the theater, the popcorn he was carrying being flung over everyone in the vicinity. I laughed at the image it brought to mind, but not the shared recollection.
Diane talked about her job at the hospital a lot, sharing amusing stories.
“I’m a pediatric nurse,” she explained.
“You love kids too, I assume.”
“Yes. But I am a horrible teacher. I can cajole, give shots, calm a child down, get them to let me look in their throat or something, but teach them anything? No.”
“I’m sure you’re better than you think you are.”
Kim leaned forward, grinning. “Trust me, she isn’t.”
Everyone laughed. Paul leaned back, playing with Diane’s fingers. “She can’t explain things to adults either.”
Diane chuckled. “Good thing I have you to do that now.”
He kissed her. “Yep.”
They weren’t as demonstrative as Jeremy and Kim, but each couple was very close. I found the fact that both girls loved children interesting. Jeremy and Paul had always expressed their desire for having a big family like ours. They had picked the right girls, it would seem. Unlike my choice.
I enjoyed meeting Kim and Diane but left after dinner when plans for continuing the evening were far more suited to couples rather than a plus-one. I invented an excuse and left.
With a groan, I let my head fall back against the wall. I had spent the rest of the night alone in my condo. I highly doubted my brothers returned to their places, or if they had, they weren’t alone.
I looked at my watch. It was only just after eight. I was hungry, but the idea of going back to the condo and ordering in didn’t appeal to me.
I stared at my feet, knowing exactly what did appeal. Some good music playing on the jukebox, something delicious and filling, and the dark, smiling eyes of a certain waitress. She had been on my mind a lot. I replayed our conversations in my head, remembering the pleasing cadence of her voice. The gentle disposition she had shown me. The strength she displayed when that asshole crossed the line. She was full of surprises, and I liked that. Probably more than I wanted to admit.
I ran my hand over my hair with a grimace. I had no idea if she even worked tonight. Just because she had been there last Thursday didn’t mean she would be there today. Yet the yearning lingered.
I pushed myself up off the floor.
There was only one way to find out.