Hitman Daddy by Aster Rae

17

Nikolai

I kissChristian on the dance floor.

I can't believe this is happening.

I feel my hard shell melting.

The walls I've constructed around my heart are cracking and falling to my feet.

I didn't expect Christian to change me.

But he’s melted my heart from the inside out.

The knowledge that I didn't tell Christian about Jonah kills me.

I hate that I kept this part of myself from him.

I hate that I lied.

Igor was right to push me to tell Christian everything.

Even though Christian and I weren't dating, I should’ve told him about my first love.

It wasn't fair to keep that from him. Especially when I sensed that my feelings were real.

I hid behind the excuse of the fake relationship to avoid confessing my truth.

Everything changes.

Now.

Christian and I already crossed the first hurdle.

He knows I'm in the mob.

But we need to work through each other's relationship history to make this work.

I palm Christian's ass as the DJ turns on a new song.

It's the new remake of the Studio Killers song Jenny with Kim Petras.

It was a smash hit in the early two-thousands but it took on a new life on Tik Tok when the group invited Kim to hop on.

I hear the romantic pulsating synths and press Christian against my body.

"I love this song." Christian nuzzles into my chest. "It's everywhere on Tik Tok."

"It's about a girl who's in love with her friend Jenny," I continue. "She leaves hints but Jenny doesn't realize it. But then something romantic happens. They get together at the end of the song."

Christian's jaw drops. "You know this song?"

"Hell yes. I used to hear it at Timofey's old nightclub on the Upper West Side."

"Holy shit. We might actually have similar tastes in music."

"Don't sound so surprised."

Christian lets out a snort. "I never thought I'd share the same taste in music with a thirty-nine-year-old man. You are thirty-nine, aren't you?"

Thirty-nine and proud of it. "Yes."

"I guess our generational differences won't be as bad as I thought." Christian grins shyly.

I let out a snort. "I'd be more worried about my family if I were you."

Christian blushes as he presses his face back on my muscular chest. "Mafia is fine. Not knowing Doja Cat would be a problem."

"Doja Cat?" I scrunch my face.

"Please tell me you know Doja Cat.”

Uh oh.

"I'm afraid our tastes in music are less aligned than you think," I confess. "Look, Christian. I don't know pop music. But I'm the type of man who will beat the shit out of someone to protect you. I won't discuss pop culture but I'll make sure no one will ever hurt you again."

I tighten my grip on his ass.

Christian wraps his little arms around my waist.

"You make me feel so small."

My cock turns into a fucking baseball bat.

We make out and dance. The music takes us to another dimension.

After we've drunk more than our fair share of vodka watermelon punch, Christian turns his beautiful blue eyes up to me.

"You have to tell me about your ex."

It’s the moment of truth.

Now or never.

"His name was Jonah."

Christian presses his body close to mine.

“We met in class. Jonah was a sophomore and I was a senior. We took Spanish together.”

"Romantic."

"We'd make seriously intense eye contact whenever we passed each other in the halls."

"I've been there," Christian jokes.

"Haven't we all?" I let out a sigh. "Jonah and I shot furtive glances at each other across campus but I didn't get the nerve to ask him out until midterms. My study skills weren't great. I spent too much time learning how to kill enemies for my father's drug empire instead of learning. I desperately needed a tutor. Jonah always spoke up in class so I asked him to help."

"And that's how you fell in love?"

"No. I fell in love one night when Jonah asked me to come over after studying. He introduced me to his cat. I was smitten. Next thing I knew I was buying his cat luxury kitty treats as an excuse to see Jonah whenever I could. Then Jonah showed me something very personal about himself that changed everything. I couldn't help but fall in love."

A silence falls.

Christian stops moving. "What did Jonah tell you?"

"He was into certain kinks." I'm being excessively vague.

Christian and I are getting along so well. I don't want to spoil the mood.

I'll tell Christian my secrets later.

"Was that a problem?" Christian queries. A worried expression falls over his face.

"Hell no. I did a double take the first time he told me but I accepted him. I came to love those intimate parts that he hadn't shown anyone. They were special."

"Tell me about yourself." I brush my thumb against Christian's soft cheek. "What kind of partners have you had?"

I can't believe I've never discussed this with Christian.

It almost feels sacrilegious that I don't know whether he's ever had a boyfriend.

I didn't know how to broach the subject.

That's the only explanation as to why I didn't ask.

But that excuse is gone now.

Vanished. Dead.

It's time to learn everything about Christian.

His passions. His past.

His kinks.

"I haven't had any partners," Christian confesses. "I used to have a major crush on Tristan and I always tried to get him to play truth or dare but he was straight."

"You've never been with anyone?"

Christian shakes his head. "I tried to find partners online. I made posts on Reddit and joined dating apps but nothing ever came of it. I couldn't find the men I was looking for. I couldn't find a..."

A vortex of curiosity encircles me as Christian stops.

“You can trust me,” I grunt.

My heart thuds at the sight of this trembling angel.

Christian opens his mouth to speak.

But just then Timofey and Igor head our way and interrupt his thinking.

"I thought you weren't really dating." Timofey grunts.

"Shut up," I grunt.

"I thought you were breaking up after the wedding," Igor says. "When are you calling it quits?"

I pull out my gun. "We’re not." I aim my gun at Igor. "Now get the fuck away from me. I'm having a serious discussion with my man."

Christian looks guilty as my brothers walk away.

"There’s something I have to tell you,” Christian confesses.