Whipping Girl by L. Jacobs
Chapter 28 – Ally
“What are you even talking about?” My hands go into his hair, gripping the short strands to keep him in place so that he’ll listen. “Don’t deserve me? Alexander, Ivan’s disgusting act doesn’t make me feel any differently about you. And as for the rest of it, I’ll admit that it terrified me when I found out about The Organization but I’ve never questioned whether or not I still wanted to be with you. I didn’t agree with any of it, not even close, but it never made me doubt that I wanted to be with you. You’re everything to me.”
“What did he tell you?” He asks quietly, frustratingly ignoring everything I just said. I pull his hair when he tries to lay his head down and his eyebrows raise in surprise at my audacity but I maintain my hold on the dark strands then give his hair a little yank when his surprise melts into amusement.
“He told me everything, and guess what? I still love you. But once again you kept something from me because you thought it was too dark for me to hear, didn’t we already have this discussion and didn’t you agree to stop keeping these kind of things from me?”
“Yes we did, but I think the fact that you carrying my baby inside of you might be a little bit bigger deal than something that happened almost 25 years ago, don’t you think?” He rips his hair from my fingers then grabs my hands, holding them over my head and giving me a little smirk as if he thought I was adorable for trying to contain him.
“Might be carrying your- look all I know is that my period is late.” I say a little breathlessly when his face goes to my neck, placing soft kisses up the column of my throat until he reaches my ear and pulls it between his teeth. I can feel him hard and throbbing on my thigh but he makes no move to do anything about it, I lift my hips in offering, he only continues with his gentle assault on my senses.
“Oh, you definitely are. Now that you’ve mentioned it, I can almost feel a part of me growing inside of you.” He licks my earlobe and I can practically feel the movement between my thighs.
“Alexander.” I pant. I want him. How does he do this to me every single time? We can be having the most serious conversation and with one touch of his hand or mouth everything else falls away, leaving this delectable craving in its wake. “I want you.” I pant, opening my legs further for him. I’m about to start begging when suddenly he’s up and off the bed, grabbing his pants to quickly pull on sans underwear. “What are you doing? Get back here.” I slap the mattress, sexual frustration making me brave.
“Shh.” He picks up the hotel phone, pressing a button before holding it to his ear. “We need some pregnancy tests sent up... yes... I don’t know what kind.” He looks to my wide eyed stare before answering again. “All of them... yes, one of each. Thank you.” He hangs up then walks to the refrigerator and grabs a bottle of water before walking back toward the bed where I’m still lying in dumbfounded shock. “Drink up.” He opens it then holds it out for me. I sit up, naked as the day I was born and stare at him with narrow eyed defiance.
“I don’t want to take the test today.” I sound pissy, probably because I am. I’ve had a few days to think about this and I have not yet decided if I would be happy being pregnant or not. I need more time.
“That’s too bad because you’re taking it. Today.” He says in that authoritative tone of his that I mostly love but hate right now.
“You can’t make me.” Even though I said it confidently it sounded extremely immature even to my own ears but he just chuckles as he walks the remaining step toward the bed and bends so that he’s over me, his hands on either side of my head.
“Baby, you have no idea what kind of things that I can make people do. I’ve made men four times your size wet themselves, you really think I can’t get you to pee on a little stick?” His challenging brows go up at the same time my confidence goes down. God, how would he even do that? I don’t think I want to know, I have no doubt in my mind that he would do whatever he had to to get his answer. But still.
“Alexander, we're supposed to be signing the papers for the house tomorrow, today I want to lie here with you without any stress, just you and me in our big bed. Take off your pants and get in here. Please?” I stretch out beneath him, trying to entice him with the body that he loves.
“Angel,” his mouth comes down to mine in a ruthless kiss that has me aching for him all over again. His hand goes to the back of my head and he pulls my face impossible closer, slanting his head so he can penetrate me deeper. A moan leaves my lips and he pulls away, his dark eyes filled with a desperate hunger that mirrors my own. “I need to know. Can you do this for me, please?”
I search his eyes, my heart aching when I see the absolute longing that he does nothing to hide from me. He really wants this, he wants me to be pregnant. I’ve seen it in his face when we’ve talked about children before, this almost jovial expression comes over his face whenever our future babies are mentioned, and I want nothing more than to give this to him... I just wanted it a couple of years from now. This would mean something to him that I cannot even fathom, he and Ivan may share blood but their relationship is rocky and unstable at best. Alexander has never had a family, he never really had anyone until The Guard gifted me to him and he craves the closeness that we share. Who am I to deny him this test? If I am pregnant then he has the right to know, even if it scares the hell out of me.
“Fine, but if it’s a positive pregnancy test then you can’t get mad at me for swearing.” He narrows his eyes, his beautiful lips pinching in disapproval before he gives me a curt nod.
“Deal.”
About 20 minutes later I am dressed and pacing the floor while Alexander grabs the ridiculously large bag from the concierge. He hands the stone-faced man a large tip, shutting the door in his face as he turns to me with a beaming smile that makes him look years younger. He’s always gorgeous but this new lightness in his eyes makes him irresistible, I’m about to suggest getting back in bed when I remember what put that look on his face.
“Let’s do this.” He grabs my arm and practically drags my reluctant body to the bathroom, setting the bag down on the counter then digging through it to pull out a few different boxes.
“It may still be too early, Alexander. I’m only a little late, it could just be stress too.” I say quietly.
“Has your period ever been late before? This one says that it can tell you about how far along you are, I like that.” He’s reading the packages, barely paying attention to our conversation.
“No, I’ve never been late but I don’t want you to get your hopes up, this happens to women all the time.” Now that I know how happy this would make him I don’t want to see the disappointment on his face if the test is negative. I should have considered this before I said anything, I feel even more conflicted than before about what I want the results to be.
“Get over here.” I lift my eyes to his and he drops the newly opened test to the vanity when I reach him. His hands cup my face and his face dips to mine, placing the softest of kisses to my lips before he pulls back and offers me a half smile. “My hopes are up, you’re right about that. But whether our positive result comes today or next month, fuck, even two years from now- I love you and this is something that you and I are creating together, a physical representation of the love that we have for each other. That’s just... it’s fucking incredible. Don’t you feel that?” This is a man who was trained to block out highly emotional situations, so to me this means everything. I don’t say it out loud but I find his statement fucking incredible.
I don’t know how I feel about the possibility of being a mom at 20 years old but if Alexander can overcome all that he has been through to feel this kind of excitement about the possibility of a life created by us then I can too. Hopefully.
“I feel it.” He gives my face a narrow-eyed once over then grabs for the test he opened, he hands it over, his face showing heavy anticipation when I take it and turn toward the toilet.
“Do you mind?” I do a swirling motion with my finger but he just rolls his eyes, leans back against the granite counter and crosses his arms over his chest.
“You really think I’m going to miss even a moment of this?”
“I guess not.” I say, pulling down my pants and taking a seat on the toilet. I don’t know why I even tried, it’s not like I’m overly shy around him anymore. I was just hoping for a moment alone so I could freak out without his watchful eyes taking me in. The test goes between my legs as I do my business. Another test appears when I pull the first one away and I cut myself off in midstream to look up into anticipating eyes. “I can’t pee on all of them!” I look over to the bag, horrified that he might expect me to continue this all day.
“I just want to make sure. This is a different brand.” He nods his head in encouragement, holding it closer. I hand him the finished test as I take the new one with a huff, sighing with relief when I can release my bladder. He takes the new test while I wipe and pull up my pants.
“How long does this take?”
“A couple of minutes.” He places them side by side. “I’ll be right back.” He exits through the broken door but my eyes remain on the white sticks even though I’m far enough away that I couldn’t read the results even if I wanted to.
I may not even be pregnant, women experience late periods all the time when they are under stress. That’s probably it. I mean, I’m only in my second year of school, my family hasn’t had a chance to get used to this. My sister and brother haven’t even met Alexander yet for God’s sake. We’re not ready. I’m just stressed. My period could come any minute now, it’ll be fine.
It isn’t until Alexander is standing in front of me that I’m taken out of my thoughts and I follow his face as he lowers into a kneeling position in front of me.
“What are you doing?” I ask in amusement before I realize what’s happening. He presents me with a black velvet box, opening it to reveal the most beautiful ring that I’ve ever seen. It’s not overly flashy, a large round diamond with one sapphire on either side of it, the band is encrusted with small diamonds that glitter in the lighting. It’s so beautiful.
“I want to make it clear that I’m still not asking but I do think that you deserved a better demand for marriage than I presented.” He smirks but all I can do is stare at him with teary- eyed wonder. “Allyanna May Kline, I’m yours. I’ve been yours since you were six years old and I will continue to be yours until the end of all time. I know I’m not always easy, I know you deserve far better than me but I’m here, on my knees, telling you that no one will ever love you the way that I do. Marry me, Angel.” Even though it’s still not a proposal, I’ve never heard sweeter words leave his lips. This is us, this is the way that we do things and I don’t want it any other way.
“Of course I will” I laugh through my tears as he places the ring on my finger. He picks me up when he stands, holding me so our faces are nearly touching.
“I’m going to make you so happy.” He kisses the tip of my nose with his promise.
“You already do.” I peck his lips, laughing when his face breaks out in a full beam once again.
“Are you ready to look at the results?” The smile drops from my face and I swallow nervously as I nod my head, even though I don’t think I’ll ever be ready to read those results. “It’s going to be okay, Angel, we’ve got this.” I paste a smile on my face that I don’t feel as he walks to the counter, placing my butt on the edge all the while staring at my face. We both take a deep breath then look down toward the white sticks.
Pregnant. I quickly move my eyes to the other test. “Pregnant” then below that 3-4 weeks. Is that how far along I am? If it’s accurate than this means that it didn’t happen when Alexander seduced me out of using protection, I wouldn’t have blamed him for this no matter what –I could have said no- but somehow it makes me feel better knowing that this was Mother Nature giving this to us and not my soon-to-be husband’s manipulation. Holy crap, I’m going to be a Mommy. I wasn’t sure what my reaction to finding this out would be but I had expected it would feel a lot like cold dread, not the elation that is currently flowing through me. A smile spreads across my face as I look up at... a pale, shocked Alexander? He hasn’t noticed me yet, eyes still staring down at our future, I clear my throat to gain his attention he and looks at me in what I can only describe as fearful apprehension.
“A little scarier than you thought, Daddy?” I don’t know why I find this humorous but I do. Man wants woman pregnant, woman gets pregnant then man is shocked into terror. I laugh out loud when he picks up the test to bring it closer to his face, squinting as if that might change the results.
“Fuck.” He places the stick on the granite then scrubs his hands over his face. “There are going to be two of you. It’s going to be a girl, I just know it.” Sweat starts to bead on his forehead as he continues. “She’ll be pretty like her Mommy and boys are going to take notice of that, I’m going to have to kill teenage boys, Ally.”
“What are you talking about?” I laugh at his rambling, thoroughly enjoying his discomfort.
“I’m telling you, I just had a flash of our future and that little girl is going to be my demise.” He points at my stomach, panic giving way to a softer expression when he follows his finger. “We’re going to have a baby.” He finishes quietly, tenderness softening his eyes.
“We’re going to have a baby.” I repeat, still unable to fully comprehend it. I have almost no experience with kids but I have no doubt that we can figure this out together. Alexander has far more love inside of him than anyone else that I know, it’s difficult to see it from an outside prospective but he shows me with every touch, every kiss and every smile that crosses his face. I’ve always known that he was it for me, not because I was conditioned to feel that way but because he taught me things that he didn’t need to, because he read pamphlets with me when I got my first period, because he was angry at the world when I was sad and because he waged a war against our fate when I was hurt.
“I’ll just have to make sure the other seven are boys.” He winks at my scoff, lifting me into his arms bridal style as he moves toward the bedroom. Finally.