Dark Need by Clarissa Wild
Chapter 25
Soren
When she slipped, I was pulled down with her. But I fought, and I managed to stay above the waterline, constantly sucking in the breaths I needed to swim to her. But every time, she kept pulling farther away from me, hitting rocks along the way. I had to get to her before it was too late, so I lifted her in my arms and held her against my chest.
But she wasn’t responsive.
Wasn’t breathing.
Still isn’t.
Not even as I swim both of us to the shore on the other side using the rocks in my way to guide me.
I lay her down on the rocks. She’s motionless and completely out of it.
She must’ve swallowed the water.
I pat her face, but she won’t wake up.
Fuck.
I won’t fucking let her die.
I refuse.
We’ve come too far for her to leave now. I still have my mission to complete. She still has life in her. And the mere thought of losing her has filled my heart with a kind of despair I’ve never felt before.
With one slice, I cut the rope between us in half. I place both hands on her chest and apply some pumps. “C’mon!”
I pump and pump, but nothing happens.
There’s only one thing left to try. It has to fucking work. Because if it doesn’t … I won’t be able to forgive myself.
I tilt her head and pinch her nose, smashing my mouth on hers as I blow in the air.
One. Two. Three times.
And then the water starts to flow.
And the dread settling in my body ceases to exist.
* * *
April
I coughup water and suck in the air like no tomorrow. My eyes burst open in a rush of panic swirling through my body as my brain is still trying to swim. But two beautiful eyes as blue as the ocean stop me and calm the storm raging in my heart.
He’s so close to me that I can feel his breath on my skin.
In fact … I can taste it … in my mouth.
My hand instinctively reaches for my face as my index finger touches my lips.
The same lips … he touched … with his.
Did he just kiss me?
“Soren?” My voice sounds like a mouse’s squeak.
The look on his face is a mixture of concern and relief as he snakes his burly arm underneath my neck and lifts me from the rock. I heave and let out more water, coughing it up until it’s all gone. Ragged breaths are interrupted by the simple gesture of his hand swiping away a strand of hair stuck to my face.
But it isn’t simple at all.
It’s sweet and gentle, and it quite literally takes my breath away.
“You’re alive …” he murmurs, his voice unsteady, unlike how I’ve heard him speak before.
And he pulls me in, nestling my head near his chest like he wants to keep me safe. Like he wants me to be close. And even though I’m still shivering to the bone, I don’t feel so cold anymore.
He tears his bag off his shoulder and takes out the blanket, wrapping it around my body before he lifts me up into his strong arms, carrying me farther away from the river.
And I can’t stop looking at that harsh face that suddenly doesn’t seem so harsh anymore. The soft hairs of his beard prickle my skin, which leaves me flustered as he takes us into a grassy area and places me down on the ground again. He sits down beside me and pulls me into his embrace, my head firmly planted against his chest as though he wants to keep me safe. And we stay there for a while, the silence around us broken only by the gusts of wind and chirping of the birds.
Every breath I take feels ragged and uneven. But not because I almost drowned.
It’s because I can hear his heart beat fast and faster as I lie here against him, just as mine does when his strong arms envelop me.
And it unchains something deep inside me that I don’t understand.
A longing.
I look up at his face marred with scars I’ve yet to understand, and for some reason, my hand instinctively reaches up to his scruffy beard, the prickles reminding me that I’m still alive.
He saved me.
He pulled me out of the water and brought me to the shore with sheer will alone.
And then he … kissed me.
I look up into his solemn eyes that peer ahead like he’s on the lookout for danger. And it’s almost as if he can sense that I’m looking because he tilts his head down, gazing at me from underneath those thick blond eyelashes, his jawline tensing when my fingers graze his beard.
Was it a dream?
Did he really plant his lips on mine, or did it all happen in my head?
“April … I thought I’d lost you there.”
It’s the first time he’s called out my name in such a concerned manner. And it breaks my heart into pieces.
I smile at his genuine concern. “I’m alive.” My voice sounds like it’s been through a grinder, though, and it makes me chuckle a little. However, the adrenaline is subsiding, and the cold comes rushing back in. I’m completely soaked and shivering like crazy.
“You’re cold,” he says with a gruff voice.
He unfurls the blanket around my body, only to wrap it around his, too, pulling me in closer.
I’m right up against his bare chest now, coarse hairs prickling my arms and chest. The pure heat he radiates could start a fire all by itself. That’s how hot he is. And for some reason, it makes me blush more than anything.
For a savage, he has such a gentle way about him that moves me.
He’s crude, hard as a rock, capable of murdering with just one hand, yet he doesn’t seem to want to actually hurt someone.
Back when we were still at the house, I remember him chopping up his food like he wanted to kill it. Like he hated being there and having to eat with me. Like he wanted to go back to whatever he was doing, return to his shell … cease to exist.
But ever since we came out here in the wilderness, something about him has changed. Like he can actually feel more than just anger and hatred. As though he’s beginning to feel something for me.
And for some reason, that makes me lean up and press a soft kiss to his cheeks.
His whole body tenses up like he’s about to attack. The look he gives me almost makes me want to run off and never come back. That’s how embarrassed I am. Especially when his hand reaches for his skin right where I pressed my lips onto him.
I mutter, “Thank you. For rescuing me.”
He brushes the spot, his muscles still tight as fuck as he holds me, but not as menacing as they were a second ago. And he frowns. He actually frowns.
“What was that?”
Now I’m frowning too. “A … kiss?”
How could he not know?
“Hmm …” It’s that same rumbling from his chest that he did before when he saw me … naked.
And it makes me swallow hard.
“Why?”
“Well, because … I … I’m grateful?” I can’t even say it with a straight face.
“You don’t have to thank me,” he says. “I told you I wouldn’t let you die.”
I nod a few times, but it doesn’t make it any easier.
“Well, maybe I just think you’re nice.”
Oh God. Why did I say that? I sound so stupid.
I tuck my hair behind my ear.
Why is this so difficult? Here I go again with the blushing.
I sigh as I try to take my mind off things, but it’s almost impossible when he’s the only thing I have. The serenity of this place really doesn’t help, as it only makes me want to relax in his arms. But it’s so beautiful here in this small pasture with flowers growing everywhere and birds and bees buzzing about. A small butterfly flutters toward us, and Soren stretches out his hand for it to land on his finger. He gazes at it for a moment as though he’s appreciating the beauty in a tiny critter he could squash without effort. Instead, he treats it as a fragile work of art that he just wants to enjoy. Before it flies off and disappears into the sunset.
I yawn and blink a couple of times as I let myself sink away into his chest, appreciating this short moment of ignorant bliss.
“You’ve stopped shivering,” he murmurs.
I nod against his skin, which feels crazily good for some reason. So good that I want to close my eyes and just fall asleep against him, even if I know that sounds wrong. But I’m so damn tired after walking all day and then swimming through a surge.
“Sleep.” His commanding voice makes goose bumps scatter across my skin.
“Here?” I ask. “But is it safe?”
His hand reaches down to my face, and he tips up my chin to make me look at him. “You’re safe with me.”
I didn’t think I could warm up any more, but apparently, I could from just those words.
“I’ll watch over you,” he adds, his breath so close I can feel it on my skin.
My skin flushes with heat.
He’ll watch me while I sleep.
Oh God.
Why did that make my pussy clench?
I hide in the blanket and curl up against him, letting myself go in the drowsiness that’s taking over my body. But along with the tiredness comes something else … dreams of a man I shouldn’t want or crave.
Not even when I sleep can I get him out of my head. In my dreams, I’m still tied to that tree, but instead of him jerking off, he’s riding up against my back, railing me from behind. And I’m drooling, moaning, begging, worshiping every inch of him inside me as I explode into a delicious orgasm.
The same kind I had when he fucked me on the table. And it’s so intense that it immediately wakes me up, my pussy soaking.
We’re lying on the grass together in the middle of the night. He’s snuggling me from behind, his arm swathed over me. And I’m still hot and bothered from the dream I just had … and all the forbidden things I wish I did when he was jerking himself off.
But what surprises me the most is that my hand is right there, between my legs. Was I touching myself in my sleep? Even now, I can’t take my hand away. It just feels so damn good.
Until I notice that my other hand is on top of his cock.
And it’s hard as a rock, swelling under my grip.
My pupils dilate as I turn my head, only to come into full contact with his darkened eyes that are filled with hunger.
Fuck.