A Real Cowboy Always Protects by Stephanie Rowe

Chapter Twenty-Six

Several hours later,Logan was leaning against the kitchen counter, watching everyone play charades.

Charades. He was at a charades game with two of his brothers, their wives, two Harts, Falcon, Leila, two gray-haired seniors, three kids, and Skylar.

And he fucking loved it.

He. Loved. It. And he knew it was because of Skylar.

He grinned as he watched Skylar acting out something. Abby was sitting on the couch next to Frank, and the older man had a smile on his face that Logan had never seen before.

Frank was watching Abby with an interest that Logan recognized. It was the same way he used to look at Skylar, when he'd been envisioning what it would be like to be with her, and Abby had the same sparkle in her eyes every time she looked over at Frank.

"I think there's some romance afoot," Chase said as he leaned on the counter beside Logan.

Logan nodded. "Frank and Abby would make a good couple. I'd love to see them happy."

"I meant you and Skylar."

Logan looked over at his brother. "I love her." Saying the words aloud felt glorious. It made them true, made them real. "I love the hell out of her."

Chase smiled and clapped him on the shoulder. "I'm so happy for you. How does she feel?"

Logan grinned. "She loves me," he admitted.

Chase gave a little fist pump. "Mira saw that in you guys. She'll be so thrilled she was right. What are you going to do about it?"

Logan said nothing. He watched as Skylar and Leila burst into hysterics about something, and he smiled. Today had given him the clarity he needed. He had no doubts anymore. "I need to quit my job. I can't be married and do that work. It's not right."

"Okay."

Logan almost laughed at his brother's non-committal response. Chase was trying so hard not to push. "I think…" he paused. "I think I'd like to move back to Wyoming. I was thinking of volunteering for search and rescue. And working with the horses again. Not sure in what capacity, but it felt right being out there today. If that's okay with you."

Chase said nothing, so Logan looked over at him.

There were tears in his brother's eyes.

Logan's throat immediately clogged up. "Cut that shit out," he muttered.

Chase suddenly turned toward him, grabbed him and hugged him.

Logan hugged him back just as fiercely, holding on tight to the brother who had somehow kept them all alive and together through their brutal childhood. "Thanks, Chase," he said, his voice rough. "Thanks for everything. None of us would be here if it weren't for you."

Chase let go and nodded, emotion etched on his face. "I'd have given my life for any of you. I still would."

"I know, but you don't need to." Logan cleared his throat. "I need to convince Skylar now. She's scared. She's been badly burned."

Chase nodded. "Let me know how we can help. Want Mira to talk to her?"

"No. It's gotta be me." Logan let out his breath. "I'm going to talk to her when we get home."

"No. Do it now. Never wait to tell someone you love them. Never."

Logan knew Chase was right. And he didn't want to wait.

Chase saw the decision on his face and clasped his hands. "Time for a break," he called out to the room. "Who wants dessert? I made three pies."

As the crowd moved toward the kitchen, Logan paused to tell Leila that he was going outside with Skylar for a minute and to wait for them, then he wove through the crowd to where Skylar and Abby were talking. "Abby? Do you mind if I steal your daughter for a sec?"

Abby lit up. "Take her away, Logan. She's all yours. Frank's waiting for me anyway." She hopped up and headed off toward Frank, who was leaning on his cane, waiting for her.

Logan held out his hand. "Skylar?"

Skylar's heart started to pound at Logan's serious expression. She couldn't quite read it, but she knew he had an agenda. "Is everything all right?"

"It is." He folded her hand in his and took her out through the glass doors to the patio. He pulled out a chair for her at a nearby table, then took the seat next to hers.

They were still within view of the gathering, and she saw Brody, Quintin, and Falcon slip out the door and melt into the shadows at the edge of the patio, keeping vigilant.

Reminding her of the threat that was still hunting them.

Logan took her hands in his and leaned forward. "Skylar."

She dragged her gaze off their bodyguards. "Logan."

"What do you think of my family?"

She couldn't help but smile. "They're wonderful. Keegan and Brody want to hire me to design the bakery. They even made an official offer that's a little outrageous, honestly."

His brows shot up. "Really? That's fantastic. It looked like you were having fun working on that."

"I was." Excitement bubbled through her. "I became an architect so that I could design the houses my dad was building. But while I was still in school, he got sick. I got a job at a firm so I could send them money to help them out while he wasn't working. Then he died, and I never left the firm. I kept doing it to help out my mom, and I'm good at it, but—" she paused, trying to think how to phrase it.

"But there isn't magic."

She met his gaze. "Exactly. Working on the bakery was magical. Their passion is contagious. It was like working with my dad again. I loved it so much."

Logan smiled. "Did you tell them you'd do it?"

Her smile faded. "I can't do it. I have to go back to my job."

Logan let out his breath. "You don't."

"I do—"

He pressed a kiss to her knuckles. "Skylar." His voice was rough, incredibly sexy, making goosebumps pop up on her arms.

"That's my name." She tried to keep her voice light.

"You know I love you."

She nodded. "You mentioned that."

He kissed the ring on her finger, the engagement ring. "I've got a shitty past. A lot more than you know, but it's pretty ugly."

Her heart turned over. "I know a little bit of it."

He was watching her, those dark eyes so intense. "I went to work for the CIA because I wanted to use that anger inside me to do good. It turned out that when I was focused on my job, the monster was quiet. I became dependent on that work to keep my mind off the darkness."

He was rubbing his thumbs over her knuckles again, in that way he had. It was so sweet and tender, an absentminded gesture of intimacy. She nodded. "I used my work the same way after my dad died and I left my marriage." She smiled. "I understand you."

"Then do you also understand that you've changed me? That you make me feel again. I feel pain, and it scares me, but I also feel happy. I feel love. For my family. For you." He met her gaze. "Especially for you."

She bit her lip. Her heart wanted to lean into him, to open to him, to bring her deep inside her soul…which terrified her. "Logan—"

"I want to hear what you have to say, but I'd like to finish first. Okay?"

She nodded.

"I want to be this man that you've unwrapped. I'm not sure exactly how to do it, but being out on the range with you and Leila today sealed it for me." He took a breath. "I want to move back here. Quit my job, move back here…and do it with you."

She stared at him, her heart thundering. "What are you saying?"

He kissed the ring. "I want this to be real, Skylar. I want to marry you."

She pushed back and stood up. "We barely know each other. You can't know that—"

He rose slowly to his feet, as if he didn't want to spook her. "We've known each other for two years. How many hours have we spent talking in the hallway? Thousands?"

"I knew my ex for three years before I married him. Three years, and look what happened! Everyone was lying to me! I lost everything!" Tears started running down her cheeks, but she couldn't stop it. "I already love your family. And I'd love the job working with the Harts. What if I come out here? And I give up everything to do it? And then you and I don't work out? Then I lose them, too. I'll have nothing. At least in Boston, I have my job and my mom and—"

"Skylar." He caught her wrists, his grip gentle, but enough to draw her attention. "First of all, the Stocktons are forever people. Loyalty is everything to us. Everything."

"So, they'll be on your side—"

"Baby." He put his finger over her lips. "There are no sides here. When I commit to you, like I'm doing right now, that's forever. That means that I will do whatever it takes to keep our relationship healthy, thriving, and beautiful. I won't walk out. If something's wrong, we'll fix it."

She shook her head. "You don't know that. What if something happens in ten years? Or fifteen? Or—"

"I won't leave. I won't ever leave you. I don't leave the people I love."

"You left your family." The minute she said it, she regretted it, especially when she saw the guilt flash over his face. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean—"

"It's okay. But I didn't leave them. I was always there for them. I came back when they needed me. Always. Yeah, I moved to Boston, but they were still the most important part of my life. And you can have family and move away. But you can't move away from your partner. It's different."

Skylar looked around at the beautiful house, at the gorgeous ranch. She looked through the glass doors at the people milling about. She saw her mom beaming at Frank. It was everything she wanted. "I couldn't go halfway with you," she whispered. "I couldn't hold myself back."

He smiled. "That's good."

"It's not. I couldn’t protect myself." She stepped back, out of his reach. "You don't understand how broken I was," she said. "I gave away everything to him. I trusted him, and all our friends."

"I'm willing to do whatever it takes to build that trust between us," he said. "Whatever it takes."

She pressed her hands to her forehead, trying to control the panic rising in her. "Logan, I can't do this. I can't. I'm not ready. I won't ever be ready."

"It's okay," he said gently. "You're okay. Breathe, sweetheart."

She tried to take a breath, but her chest was tight. "I can't—"

"Do you love me?"

She scowled at him. "Logan, stop."

"Skylar." He walked over to her and took her hand. "Do you love me?"

"That's not the point," she said, pulling her hand away. "It's not so much about you, and whether I trust you. It's about me. I don't trust myself anymore. I can't trust myself. I made a mistake before, a terrible, terrible mistake that went on for years. If I couldn't see what was happening then, how can I possibly trust my judgement again? The fact I love you and your family and this whole life out here makes it even more impossible to trust my ability to see clearly."

Logan ground his jaw. "It's all right, then. I'll go back to Boston with you. We'll take it slow—"

"No," she whispered. "Don't you understand? There is no slow for me when it comes to you. You've been my sunlight for so long that I can't hold back with you. I'd be all in with you. And I can't do that."

"Skylar—"

"No." She held up her hand as he tried to talk. "No more. Just…please…stop. I'm going inside. Please, just let it be, okay?" She pushed past him, hurrying by. He didn't move as she passed, letting her go.

She didn't turn as she ran inside, but she felt him behind her following closely. She waved at everyone as she stepped inside. "I'm going to run to the bathroom." She ducked down the hall before anyone could ask and practically dove inside the same bathroom she'd hidden in when she'd first arrived.

She didn't bother to look at herself in the mirror this time. She just sat on the edge of the tub and hugged herself. Why was she so broken? Why couldn't she take a chance? If it didn't work, it didn't work. Plenty of people recovered from broken hearts. Why was she so pathetic?

She didn't want to be like this. She hated being afraid and pathetic. But her hands were shaking, and she felt like she was going to throw up.

There was a light knock at the door, and she squeezed her eyes shut. There was no way she could talk to Logan right now. "Go away."

The person at the door knocked again.