Denied Mate by Roxie Ray
Cal
The room wobbled in the dark and my alarm clock floated out of focus. I made out something like 4:13 and groaned in frustration. I’d passed out barely an hour earlier, and I had no idea why I’d woken up while I was still wildly drunk. With a pillow over my face, I rolled over and tried to slip back into oblivion. Haunted, all I could think about was Liv. My stomach tightened and my wolf whined, worried she was in trouble. Ugh, whatever, she was fine. She was home safe and guarded by her asshole brother. I growled at my wolf and he growled right back.
Unable to shake the feeling something was wrong, I ceded to my wolf. If he wanted so damn badly to be awake, then he could do the thinking for us. I didn’t have her number, and I sure as shit wasn’t going to slink over to her apartment with my tail between my legs and some line about checking in on her. Please. I wasn’t so pathetic.
Surrendering to being both drunk and awake, I lay on my back in bed, in the same bedroom I’d had since we’d moved to Westend, and stared at the glowing stars stuck to my ceiling. Working within the smaller surface area of my cramped new room, I’d replicated the pattern Liv and I had first made with the glowing stickers when we’d decorated my bedroom in Central Bridgehaven. Liv had stuck Saturn in the middle of the galaxy because it was her favorite. I’d wedged a bright blue Venus beside it, secretly hoping the Goddess of Love would keep the two of us as close together. I was clearly no witch—the attempt at magic sure hadn’t worked.
After a few hours of checkered sleep littered with dreams and bad memories, I dragged my corpse out of bed and hit the shower. Our small bathroom smelled like Ma’s beauty products and fancy soaps. I cranked the hot water and stuck my face in the spray, desperate to wash away some of the self-pity I was sinking into. It soothed my headache but did nothing for the ache in my chest, and didn’t stop my wolf whining. So I got dressed, grabbed my bus pass, and headed out to give love to someone who I knew would accept it.
Ma’s doctors were huddled outside her room and stepped apart when they saw me coming down the corridor. I almost stumbled from fear something had gone wrong. I couldn’t face losing her, not after the night I’d just had.
“Hey. What’s going on?” I sounded harsh, but I wasn’t messing around.
“Good news.” Dr. Francis, the head of surgery or whatever, managed a smile through his usually dour expression. “Ms. Meyers is doing well.”
Thank fuck. “How well? Like, can I get her out of here?”
A specialist I’d never actually been introduced to stepped in. “Ah, no. We’ll need to closely monitor her.”
“So… It’s looking good right now, but it could be temporary?” I glanced between them, trying to read the situation for what it was. They never gave it to me straight. Probably assumed I was an uneducated Westend drop-out which, okay, maybe I was, but I could understand at least some of the nuances of a health emergency and I could handle bad news. Also, I had the internet. I could fucking look things up if I had to.
“Your mom is awake and would love to talk to you.” Jessica, the nurse from earlier, slid over and motioned to the open door.
Okay, they weren’t going to be any more forthcoming. I took the hint, thanked the doctors, and followed her toward the room.
As we got closer, she leaned in and whispered, “And your bill is paid.”
My guard jumped right up and I did a double take. I didn’t mean for her to wipe the account, I’d just wanted more time to get the funds together. The last thing I needed was to be indebted to some nurse I’d just met. Fuck, what if she lost her job over it?
But she held up her hands innocently and shrugged. “Don’t look at me! Paid in full, and there’s a credit card on the account for future charges too. You got friends in high places?”
“Yeah,” I choked. “You could say that.”
I rubbed my eyes with my forefinger and thumb, trying to scrub out the idea Liv had anything to do with it—but of course she did. Who else? I didn’t want to rely on her for anything. I couldn’t. Her brother would just have to say the word and she’d cut me off again. I sighed. At least she’d done something, I guess. I hadn’t even asked. It was something.
“Hey, Christine! Guess who’s here?” Jessica pulled back the curtain around my mom’s bed and pulled me right out of my thoughts.
Ma beamed at me as best she could, her eyes still a little swollen and the bruising on her face fading but clearly still painful. Joy jumped in my chest, my wolf barked in delight, and I hurried over, smiling back at her with all the love in my body. Her face was sallow and she’d lost some plumpness from her cheeks, but her hair looked good. I was impressed, Jessica knew how to take care of C3 curls. (I’d once made the mistake of asking her why she needed some many hair products. My mom gave my very smartass question a very detailed reply, and after thirty minutes, I knew more about hair care than your average Suave commercial and I never bothered her about her product ever again.)
“Momma…” I dropped into the chair beside her bed and took her hand. “How are you feeling?”
“Oh, you know…” She laughed then cut herself off with a grimace. “Like someone hit me with a truck. On purpose. Twice.”
Jessica winked and slipped out of the room, closing the door behind her.
I scooted my chair closer to Ma and held her hand to my chest so she could feel my heart beating for her. “I’m so glad you’re doing okay. We’re going to make it through this. You’re stronger than this.”
“I know, baby.” She tutted and looked at me like I was the one in the bed. “You been finding trouble?”
I chuckled and shook my head. “It found me. Don’t worry, Ma. Just trying to figure all this out. You have any idea who came for you?”
She hummed and slumped back into her pillows. With her eyes closed, she shook her head from side to side, but I’d known the woman my whole life. I could see right through her evasive tactics.
“Ma…” I put on the same tone she gave me when I was playing the fool.
“I don’t know who did it, baby.” She peeled her eyes open and gently squeezed my hand. “But I have an idea why they might have.”
I stiffened and searched her face for answers. Her heart rate monitor beeper a little faster as she tried to sit up, but I urged her to stay down. I wanted her to spill the intel, but not if it stressed her out.
“I’ve been poking my nose into business I was supposed to bury a long time ago.” Ma rolled her head to the side and looked at me with a sad expression I hadn’t seen for years. “I hired a private investigator to look for your dad.” She paused, chewing on her lower lip. “Well, several. This is the only investigator who’s turned anything up at all.”
Ocean noise rushed through my ears. My grip tightened on her hand, and my heart stopped.
I must have misheard, still tipsy from the night before. “What?”
“I don’t think he’s dead, Cal.” Mom’s voice was barely a whisper.
I reeled. I’d spent years thinking I was crazy for suspecting the same. Maybe she was nuts too. Maybe we were the same kind of nuts. That would make sense, right? “Ma…”
Her heart rate raised a little and the monitor beeped a warning. She inhaled deeply and held my hand tight. “I never told you, because I don’t want you running around poking into it. The power in the Bridgehaven pack… They don’t want me looking, and I needed to keep you safe. It would have been dangerous to tell you. And I didn’t want you thinking I was crazy.”
I laughed and ran a hand over my face. “Momma. Hell, we’re both crazy. Every time I go out on my camping trips, I’m looking for him.”
She managed a short laugh and then tsked, looking at me with love. “You ever find anything?”
I shook my head. “A scent sometimes, but it always runs cold. Don’t know if it’s even him I catch a scent of. I can barely remember how he really smelled…”
She brought my hand to her lips and kissed my knuckles.
“Did you and your detective find something?” The question landed heavy on my tongue and everything in the room fell quiet.
“Not the detective… But six months after your father disappeared, I got some information. And a warning, which was enough to tell me something was up.” She put our clasped hands on her chest. “A senior member of the Bridgehaven pack came to visit me and assured me I was right to question what we were being told. And he said I should stay as far away from it as I could. If I was going to look into what happened to David, I’d be putting myself in danger. And you.”
I closed my eyes and let out a shuddering sigh. Dad was alive… Or at least, he might have been back then. My wolf huffed in frustration, our intuition vindicated but maybe too late. “Who told you?”
“You remember Old Albert?” I nodded and frowned. He’d seemed ancient when I was a boy, and if he looked old, imagine how old he actually was; I’d also seen an obituary for Albert J. Hobbes three years ago. Ma had left the paper on the kitchen table. At the time, I assumed she’d just been sore over another pack snub. Now, I realized what that really meant. Another closed door.
Ma kept talking. “I’ve been saving cash for years to afford a decent detective. Putting on the big smiles for the townsfolk over at Clarke.” She’d been working double shifts at a diner a few towns over where no one knew to shun us. “I’ve been stacking all my tips, and I finally had enough to get a really good guy to look for your dad.”
Yeah, right. How good was the detective? Seemed obvious to me he’d tipped off the pack to Ma snooping around and landed her in the hospital.
“Ma… What’s this guy’s name? Wait, hang on… Why do you think Dad’s still alive, though?” I winced at the possibility… He could have been alive for years after we’d lost him, but died since. We might have missed our opportunity.
She shrugged. “Don’t you feel it?”
I groaned and hung my head. Yeah, I did. Like a hollow in my heart.
Mom hummed and looked me over like she had something more to say. I squeezed her hand, imploring her to tell me everything. I needed every secret out. Everything on the table.
Her voice dropped to a near-whisper, strained. “Your Aunt Polly called me last year after your grandmother died.”
We’d seen Polly at the funeral after my granny on my dad’s side had passed away, but not since. She lived five hours away and had sworn off Bridgehaven since the disappearance. A phone call from her wasn’t unusual, but Mom’s tight lips told me there was something special about what had been said on this one.
“Polly was upset. Told me your grandmother’s necklace was missing, the heart locket, you remember it?” Mom’s breath was strained but she pressed on. “She called… The funeral home told her a family member had picked it up after the service.”
“Ma, it’s okay. Rest. We can talk later.” I smoothed her shoulder down, urging her to relax.
She shook her head, her eyes suddenly frantic with urgency. “You need to— Need to know. The necklace.”
Her heart rate monitor beeped a warning, and another machine joined the chorus.
“Ma, shh.”
“Found it on our doorstep a week after Polly… called.” She took a labored breath and finally relaxed onto her pillow.
The beeping settled, and her words trickled through my mind. The implication… Dad had snatched his mom’s necklace and left it for Ma as a gift. A message he was still alive? Why a locket, of all things, and not a fucking note?
I groaned and slipped my hand from hers to rub my eyes. Hungover, maybe even still a little drunk, and I couldn’t get a solid grip on what I was being told. Dad was, maybe, alive. The pack didn’t want us to know it. But he did, but only a little bit, not enough to make himself known.
Nausea rolled through me. I remembered every camping trip I’d taken—tactically designed missions in a spiderweb formation, radiating out from the center of Bridgehaven. I planned to cover every inch of the state if I had to, until I’d found him or convinced myself he was really gone.
Fuck, he could have jumped out of the bushes at any time while I was out there, howling for him. But he hadn’t. I felt like an idiot every time I drove home, a total moron for holding onto childish hope he was still alive...and he’d kept himself hidden. I’m not sure if I ought to feel like more of a moron, or less.
“Calum.” Ma tapped my arm gently until I opened my eyes. “Liv’s a good girl, you keep her safe.”
I frowned, completely thrown by the change in topic. “What has this got to do with Liv?”
Jesus, Ma had sustained memory problems from the attack too.
“There’s more to her than you think.” Her voice was so soft I could barely hear it, and the beeping started up again. “Cal…”
I leaned in close to hear her over the rush of white noise in my head.
“Believe what the elder said. Keep your eyes open with her.”
“Ma, trust me, Liv is tied up in the pack and I’m not interested—”
The machines burst into a cacophony of high-pitched beeps and urgent buzzing. Mom slumped back, her eyes slid shut, and every muscle seemed to slacken. I gasped and touched her face as I started to panic.
“Ma. Stay with me, Ma.” My own pulse skyrocketed and my hands shook. “Just hang in there— Ma? Ma! You have to stay with me!”
Jessica rushed in and pulled me back, saying something about blood pressure and stabilization, and suddenly Ma was surrounded by what felt like an entire pack of nurses and the doctors from the hall. Confusion smashed up against fear, and I stumbled back on my feet, covered my mouth and muffled a sob. Water in my eyes—fuck, tears… I swiped at them and let out a frustrated growl. Jessica shot me a look, and I got the message. I didn’t dare step in and try to help. Relegated to the sidelines, all I could do was stand back, watch as they tried to save my Ma and try to make sense of what she’d told me.
