My Unexpected Family by Harlow James

Chapter 12

Silas

Fighting off the laughter I feel building in my throat, I cover my mouth with my hand as I watch Chloe work the meat in the bowl beside my grandmother.

“Now, not too much. You don’t want to overmix the meat or the meatball will turn out tough.”

“I can be gentle when I’m touching meat. Right, Silas?” Chloe glances up at me and gives me a wink.

My grandmother walks to the other side of the kitchen for a moment, giving me a chance to lean over the counter and whisper to her. “You’re seriously going to make a comment like that right now in front of my grandmother?”

She giggles and then shrugs. “It was just too easy of an opportunity.”

“What are you two talking about?” Nonna comes back over and slides freshly diced parsley into the bowl that Chloe has her hands elbow deep in.

“Nothing,” I mutter.

“I sincerely hope you’re not making penis comments around my meat,” Nonna says and then catches herself, causing us all to burst out in laughter.

“Is it safe in here for little ears yet?” Valentina asks as she rounds the corner into the kitchen with Lorenzo holding her hand.

It’s Thanksgiving Day and my sisters are finally starting to arrive. Valentina is always on time, but Mia and Bianca will show up late as always.

“It can be,” I say, reaching out to fist bump my nephew. “Enzo, my man. How’s it going?” I look around my sister to see her husband hanging up their coats by the door.

“Zio!” He releases his grip on Valentina’s hand and then jumps up into my arms. “Wanna play soccer with me? I need to practice.”

“It’s a little cold outside, Enzo,” Valentina replies.

“Did you bring a jacket?” I stare down at my nephew, his face about to crumble with disappointment.

“Yes…”

“Then we won’t stay out too long,” I say to my sister, lifting Enzo off of me before standing, telling him to go grab his coat.

“You’re going to play soccer?” Chloe asks as she forms meatballs with her hands. I’ve got to hand it to her—she’s a natural in the kitchen and looks damn sexy while she’s standing there.

“Damn straight.”

“Don’t hurt yourself, old man,” she teases.

I round the counter and stand behind her, caging her in with my arms planted firmly on the granite, ignoring the pairs of eyes watching us as I do. “You know damn well that this old man can hold his own,” I whisper in her ear, watching the goosebumps develop on her exposed skin. She’s wearing an off-the-shoulder chocolate colored dress that hugs her changing body and I can’t wait to strip her out of it later.

“You’re right. Please don’t punish me.” She smirks as she pushes her ass into me.

“I make no such promises.” I press a kiss to her cheek and then rear back to find Valentina watching us.

“Well…looks like you two are getting along.”

Rolling my eyes, I grab a floret of raw cauliflower from the veggie tray on the counter, dip it ranch, and pop it into my mouth. It’s no sour gummy worm, but it will do. I was out-voted the year I suggested a buffet of candy be mandatory at all holiday functions, so I make due with what’s offered. “Mind your own business, Val.”

At that moment, Enzo comes running into the kitchen with a full down-feathered jacket, beanie, and gloves, hoisting his soccer ball on his hip.

“I’m ready, Zio.”

“He looks like he’s about to go into a snow storm, Valentina. It’s like…sixty degrees out there, not negative twenty.”

She points a finger at me. “Come back and talk to me after your son is born and gets his first cold with a fever so high you’re afraid it might not break. Then we’ll see if you think I’m being crazy.”

She’s right. I have no idea what it’s like to care for a sick kid, so I guess my opinion doesn’t count. “Okay, you win.”

“Thank you.”

“Let’s go, Zio.” He yanks on my hand as I reach for my jacket off the back of my chair and then head for the backyard to kick around the soccer ball with my favorite little guy—at least he will be until my own son is born and we can all do this together.

Enzo shows me how fast he can run, how well he can dribble, and how high he can kick the ball into the back of the net set up on the grass that Nonna leaves back here for him. Seeing as how he’s the only great-grandchild in our family right now, the little man has a lot of amenities in place just for him.

“He’s a natural, huh?”

I spin around to see Valentina has joined us out here, clutching her sweater around her growing belly as well.

“Definitely. That De Luca talent is strong.”

“So are his genes. I swear, he looks nothing like Oliver.” She laughs. “Maybe this one will look a little more like him.”

“Another boy, huh?”

“Yeah.” She smiles. “And I am perfectly happy. I love my boys, and after growing up with our sisters, I don’t think I could handle raising a little girl of my own.”

“Amen, sister.”

“So… what’s going on with you and Chloe?” She arches a brow at me as I kick the ball back across the grass to Enzo.

“Is that what you came out here for? To pry?”

“Silas, you know my heart is always in the right place.”

I sigh and scratch the side of my face where I’ve let my stubble grow out a bit at Chloe’s request. I never thought I’d be concerned about my facial hair and what a woman thinks about it, but it seems there’s a first time for everything—a notion that is becoming more real the further along I get into this thing I have going on with Chloe.

“I know. Well, if you want the truth, we’re…sleeping together.”

“Oh shit.” She chuckles and then rubs her belly. “Continue…”

“Is that not what you were expecting me to say?”

“I mean, I kind of figured, I just didn’t imagine you coming right out and saying it.”

I scoff. “Well, it’s the truth. But it’s not just sex.”

“Now that I can definitely tell. You have feelings for her, don’t you?”

“Something like that,” I admit.

“Why do you sound uncertain about it?”

I drag my hand through my hair this time. “Because I don’t know what it all means. I can’t keep my hands off of her, Val. She’s so damn sexy, and funny, and all I want to do is protect her and the baby.”

“You’ve always been super protective of all of us, Silas, but it’s different when it’s your own child, huh?”

I nod. “And it’s not just that. It’s her.”

“She’s changed you,” she replies honestly.

“You think?”

“Ha. It’s all Nonna talks about—how your aura is brighter now, how your heart is opening up…”

“It’s so fucking scary. I don’t want to make things complicated with the baby, but I can’t stop touching her, caring for her. I just…I don’t want….” I pause and clear my throat before continuing. “I don’t want to end up like mom and dad,” I confess for the first time in my life to my sister, which instantly has Valentina’s eyes tearing up. “Shit, Val. I didn’t mean to make you cry.” Pulling her into me, I let her emotions take over before she pushes me away and swipes under her eyes.

“Damn hormones,” she mutters.

“I know. Chloe has been bad lately too.” The other night while she was watching Antique Roadshow, she started sobbing when a woman brought on a Little Golden book signed by the author that she thought was an original, and it turned out to be a fake. “But why the outburst?”

“I tell Oliver the same thing all the time. I don’t want to end up like mom and dad were either—married, but not happily married, raising kids together but acting like strangers—and then dead when they tried to rekindle their relationship a little too late.”

“Yup.”

“But I think that being alone would be worse,” she says, glancing up at me. “And I know that’s always been your goal…until Chloe.”

“Until Chloe,” I agree.

“You know the biggest thing I’ve learned in therapy is that just because it happened to mom and dad, doesn’t mean it has to happen to us.”

“You go to therapy?”

She nods and smiles. “After Enzo, I was mildly depressed, so Oliver encouraged me to go. But now, I go for me. She’s helped me work through other things in my life, like mom and dad’s death and my own insecurities.”

“I went a few years back too, but I’m still scared of loss.” My anxiety makes life hard to live sometimes, so I decided to get some help on top of taking medication, but I hadn’t found someone that made me want to overcome the hurdles I’ve been working on until now.

“Well, because being afraid means you have something to lose.”

“Exactly. And if I lost her, the baby…” I shake the thoughts from my head because the last thing I need right now is to have a panic attack in front of my family.

“Have you two talked about the future at all?”

I shake my head. “No. We’re just…enjoying each other right now, getting to know each other more, and navigating the pregnancy together.”

“I think that’s a safe place to start. But you need to push yourself to envision more, Silas. Like, are you guys going to stay together after your son is born?”

“I…I don’t know.”

“Is that what you want?”

Yes,I say to myself. “I’m not sure what Chloe wants, but…I could see that.”

“That’s good. We really like her.”

“I’m glad, and thank you for welcoming her in. You know…her parents are dead too.”

Valentina’s mouth drops open. “Oh no. Poor thing.”

“Yeah. She grew up in foster care and group homes. The woman has never had a family…”

Valentina reaches for my hand. “She does now.” I nod, and then she throws another curve ball at me. “So are you guys going to do maternity pictures?”

“Wow. Way to change the subject. What are those?”

“Men,” she says, rolling her eyes. “Don’t you remember when I had pictures done while I was pregnant with Enzo, wearing that blue gown that floated around me? I posted them on Facebook, even though I felt like a whale.”

“Oh…yeah, those were cool.”

“You should schedule some for you and Chloe. You’re going to want to remember this time someday and it might help you start to feel like your own little family.”

“She’s been so insecure about her body lately though.”

“I was the same way, but I’m telling you, she will be glad she did this. A little make-up and good lighting will make her feel gorgeous, and you two can take a few shots together too.”

Having pictures done with Chloe has my heart racing and images filling my mind of what we would look like together, what my hands would look like all over her gorgeous body carrying my son.

“I like that idea.”

“It’s a simple way to show her that you care about her too,” she says while nudging me playfully.

“I do care about her, Val. It’s just…”

Her hand lands on my arm in reassurance. “I know. Small steps, okay? I’d hate to see you lose one of the best things to ever happen to you out of fear, big brother.”

And that’s exactly my fear too.

* * *

“And the woman can make a meatball,” I exclaim at the table, garnering laughs from my family.

“She can now stay in the De Luca family!” Nonna jokes while the rest of us hoot and holler. “Seriously, Chloe. I might have to fire Valentina and keep you on full time.”

“Hey! I learned from you too!” Valentina argues. “Although, if it means I can stay off my feet, then I might just let Chloe take over.”

I cast my eyes to the side to find Chloe smiling, but her eyes filling with tears. “Hey, you know we’re just joking, right?”

“Yeah, I know.” She nods and then sets down her fork. “I’m glad they turned out well. Thank you, Nonna, for teaching me. It meant a lot. I just…I just need to get some fresh air.” I watch her swallow, flash us a tight-lipped smile, and then slowly stand from her chair, reaching for her sweater off the back before going outside to the deck.

“Is she okay?” Mia asks, clearly concerned.

“Yeah, she’s probably just emotional.”

“I hope she knows we were teasing,” Bianca adds.

“I’m sure she does. Sometimes you just get overrun with emotions, and can’t help the tears that accompany them,” Valentina explains, rubbing her pregnant belly, but focusing her eyes on me from across the table.

I flash a wink at my sister and then follow Chloe outside, finding her clutching the railing of the deck I helped my grandfather build before he died, the wind blowing her wild hair out and away from her face. The sunlight catches the tears sliding down her cheek, but all I see is how beautiful she looks right now against the oranges and reds in the sky.

It’s the same thought I had when I kissed her out here months ago—now look at where we are.

“You okay?” I walk up to her, pressing my chest to her back and caging her in like I did before in the kitchen.

“I’m embarrassed,” she says through a laugh.

“Why?”

“Because I keep crying when I’m over here.”

I press a kiss to her temple, reassuring her in a way I know she needs. “Talk to me. What’s going on?”

“I never had this, Silas. The whole big family, holiday dinners, the joking and laughing, people caring about how I’m feeling and wanting to throw me a baby shower.”

“Nonna wants to throw you a baby shower?”

She nods. “And your sisters. They wanted Shayla’s number so they could all help, so I gave it to them.”

My smile is instantaneous. My sisters and grandma are making an effort to make Chloe feel like a part of the family because she is now, regardless of what happens between the two of us, and I’m so fucking glad. “And that’s bad because…”

“It’s not bad,” she says, squeezing my forearm while looking out over the yard. “It’s just a lot. And then…right now…with the meatballs.”

“Aw, baby.” I kiss her temple again. “They’re welcoming you in.”

“I know. And it feels…amazing,” she whispers. “But also scary.”

“I know the feeling,” I reply, only thinking of how I’m feeling about her is very similar to what Chloe’s experiencing about becoming part of my family.

“Were you going to tell me you built this deck?” she asks, changing the subject, which catches me off-guard.

“What?”

Suddenly, she’s twisting in my arms to face me, so I move my hands from the railing of the deck to her hips. “I feel like there’s so much I don’t know about you, Silas. We’re having this baby together, I know your dick is incredible and you know how to use it, and that you love sour candy, but I still feel like there are parts of you that you’re hiding.”

I laugh but then squint at her. “Because I didn’t tell you I built this deck?”

She shrugs. “That’s part of it. I feel like there’s two versions of you I get to see. The one when we’re at home and you’re holding back, and then the one when you’re here with your family and acting care-free.”

Home. Chloe referred to my house as home, and I can’t deny that it definitely feels more like a home now that she’s there.

But I understand where she’s coming from. I do hide part of who I am around her, not because I don’t want to show her, but because it’s what I’ve always done with everyone. However, with her here around my family, I feel free—and maybe that’s a sign I need to take to heart.

I take a deep breath and then blow it out to the side. “My grandfather taught me how to woodwork. I have all of his tools in my shop at my house.”

Her eyes widen with that morsel of information. “So that’s what you do out there.”

“Yeah. Why? What did you think I do?”

“Watch porn and drink beer?” She shrugs. “I thought about sneaking in there a time or two while you were gone, but I didn’t know if there were dead bodies in a freezer or something, and I’d hate to have to testify against you in court.”

I can’t help but laugh. “Nope. I actually helped him make the table in the living room in my house that you pointed out when you first moved in.”

“Ah, now that makes more sense. Why didn’t you want to tell me?”

“I’m not one to share a lot of my life, Chloe. There are parts of me I’ve always kept to myself.” My hand cups her cheek. “But I’m trying…”

She reaches up and runs her fingers down the side of my face. “Thank you.”

“For what?”

“For sharing that with me. I would love to go out in the shop sometime and see what you do out there.”

“Yeah?”

She nods. “Plus the image of you covered in sawdust is really turning me on.”

I throw my head back in laughter. “Always turning things back to sex.”

“It’s all I think about most days,” she replies and then shrugs again.

I lean down and line my lips up to her ear. “Sex with you is all I think about most days now too.” She shivers and then her lips find mine as I feel her body relax in my arms. “You ready to go back inside and finish up your first family Thanksgiving?”

“Yeah.” Her smile builds and then I can see a thought occur to her. “Do you realize that next year our son will be here for the holiday?”

And that’s when it dawns on me too. This is the last Thanksgiving I’ll have where I won’t be a father, where I won’t have my own little man to feed and hold while Chloe helps in the kitchen. And years after that I’ll be taking him and Enzo out back to play soccer while the women all help each other in the kitchen, our family only growing from here.

And that movie plays in my mind for the rest of the night, through all the conversations, through all the laughs and joking, and the entire time I hold Chloe next to me on the couch, feeling as though the thought of being alone isn’t as appealing anymore as it sounded before.

* * *

“Keep your eyes closed.” With Chloe’s hand in mine, I lead her into my shop, glancing in the corner again to make sure my latest projects are covered so I don’t ruin the surprise for her later.

“They are. I swear, I never imagined you being this serious about your man cave.”

“A man’s garage is a sacred place, Chloe. Respect must be paid.”

She snorts. “Just hurry up. I have to pee.”

I chuckle and then stop her right in the middle of the shop so she can open her eyes and get the best view of everything. “Okay, you can open your eyes now.”

Her lashes slowly lift and then her head starts to spin around as she takes in my sanctuary. An assortment of carving tools and hammers lines the back wall of the shop, conveniently located just behind the two long tables I use to place pieces on while I’m working. A sink and small bathroom is located off to the right, and to the left is a more open space with a classic car I swear I’ll fix up one day, and a few unfinished pieces in the far left corner, out of the way until I have time to get to them.

It’s not spectacular, but it’s mine—my favorite space besides being in my bed with Chloe now.

“This is…crazy.”

“Crazy?”

“Yeah.” She steps away from me, walking over toward the bench that has a coat rack on it that I’m working on for a supplier of mine. I mentioned my hobby to him one day and he asked me to make something for his mom, so I am. “I’m impressed.”

“Thank you.”

“No wonder you’re so good with your hands,” she says over her shoulders, playfully grinning at me.

I shove my hands in my pockets so I don’t lift her up on the bench and prove that statement true. The shop is messy and dirty, and definitely not the kind of place I should maul Chloe in. “I’m going to take that as a compliment.”

“You should. So what is this?” She runs her finger along the coat rack I’m working on before I explain the piece to her. “I love that you’re making things for people.”

“Yup. They’re all getting a De Luca original. My grandfather used to take his pieces to the farmer’s market or swap meets and sell them too sometimes.”

“So cool.” She continues to admire the room and then her eyes focus on the sheet covered pieces in the corner by the car. “What are those?”

“Just a few things that aren’t ready yet.”

“Can I see?”

I shake my head. “Nope.”

“Aw, come on. Are you one of those perfectionists that has to wait until something is complete before showing it off?”

I arch a brow at her. “Uh, yes. And that shouldn’t even surprise you at this point. But that’s not why you can’t see those.”

“Why can’t I see them?”

“Because.”

She sighs and then rolls her eyes. “Fine. I can see I’m not going to get you to budge on that one.”

“Nope.”

She glares at me as she walks over to the car. “Stubborn man.” With her hand on the hood of my ’74 Nova, she asks, “Will you at least tell me about the car?”

“That I can do.” I join her on the other side of the room, admiring the vehicle in front of me. “Growing up, I always admired classic cars, and really wanted one for my first car. My dad was supposed to help me fix this up before I could drive, but he was busy and then he died, so it never happened.” Chloe’s mouth turns down, but she doesn’t say anything. “I hope to get around to it one day, but then I’ll start a new wood piece and it just continues to sit there.”

“I could totally see you driving this car years from now—gray hair, your tanned arm hanging out of the window, the wind hitting your face as you cruise along the coast…you’d be a sexy old man, Silas. All the old ladies would be throwing their granny panties at you.”

What’s funny is that the image that pops in my brain is years ahead of where Chloe’s mind is at—her in the passenger seat, our son in the back, headed to his soccer game on a Saturday morning after making love to her in bed and fixing us breakfast…

“Silas?”

“Yeah?” I think she was talking, but I was too busy picturing our future, and my heart hammers at the thought.

“Did you hear me?”

“No. Sorry.”

She shakes her head at me. “Do you think our son would like this car someday?”

And that question has me smiling. “Yeah, that’s a thought.”

“I mean, if you never get around to fixing it up, it might be something you could do with him.” She rubs her belly and smiles thoughtfully while looking down at the car.

“I like that idea.” My legs take me to her and I reach out to wrap her in my arms.

“Thank you for bringing me out here.”

“You’re welcome,” I say, but my mind finishes my thoughts for me.

Please don’t leave me. Let me bring those visions of yours to life. Let us be a family.

And they play on repeat in my mind for the next few weeks as the days until we meet our son inch closer and closer, and my feelings for Chloe grow stronger with each passing day.