Jax by E. M. Moore
9
The needle pinches my skin as it slides underneath the surface. Apparently, the ER doctor says I’m malnourished and dehydrated after getting the results back from my bloodwork, so they’re hooking me up to an IV. The bubbly nurse keeps rambling on about a puppy she just got, and I can’t help but be jealous that the only thing she has to worry about is potty training her dog when I have far greater concerns on my hands.
“Aw, that’s cute,” I say, smiling at the nurse as she hooks me up to the machine.
When she’s finished, she frowns at me. “I hope you feel better.”
I’m sure I already look a lot better. They cleaned off the blood, put a bandage on my lip and gave me an ice pack for my cheek. I’m not even sure why they wanted the bloodwork but apparently it was a good idea since I’m practically wasting away.
She flits from the room, and I lie back, groaning. Everything is white and pristine in here. They told me I could turn the TV on in the corner but someone else in one of the sectioned off little areas already has theirs on full blast, playing some kid cartoon so it’s not like I’d be able to hear anything anyway. Plus, it’s been so long since I’ve watched TV, I would have no idea what’s even good anymore. Is Pretty Little Liars still on? Did they find out who “A” was?
I don’t have much time to think about it because the curtain parts, and a middle-aged woman walks in. She introduces herself as another ER doctor. She examines me again then crosses her arms in front of her as she stares down at me. “Did you know your attacker?”
I shake my head, trying for the perfect picture of a victim. “No, he just accosted me while I was out.”
“I’ll call the police for you then.”
“Don’t bother. I didn’t get a good look at him.”
“Maybe one of the houses and businesses nearby has a camera?”
“In the Heights?” I lift my brows. “Doubt it.”
I know I’m being difficult but pointing the finger at Psycho isn’t a good idea. I’ve been replaying the scene where he left me with Jax in my head, and I’m pretty sure he did it on purpose. He saw an opportunity for me to work my way into their lives again, and he used it. Otherwise, there’s no freaking way he would’ve let me leave with them. In his mind, he owns me.
“You know,” the doctor starts. She has small wrinkles around her lips that puckers when she talks. “If someone is doing this to you, there are programs that can get you help. It’s scary and you could be worried but—”
“Everything’s fine,” I cut her off. “Really. It was some jackass on the street. Probably trying to rob me but obviously he picked the wrong person because I don’t have anything.”
Her tongue darts between her lips. She’s not an idiot. It’s obvious she knows what’s going on, whether she figured it out or whether Jax, Finn, and Leenie helped fill her in, I have no idea. They’re long gone by now, I’m sure. “If that’s the case, I’m glad to hear it. I do need to talk to you about your diet though. You’re underweight and lacking in many vitamins and nutrients that the body needs to be healthy. If it’s at all possible, I’d like to see you eating some nutrient-dense foods. Meat, vegetables, fruit. You know, the good stuff.”
“I’ll try,” I tell her but my heart’s not in it.
She looks weary, as if she has to have this spiel with a lot of people in the Heights. At least I don’t have track marks so she knows I’m not a druggie who’d rather spend money on getting high than food.
“So, when can I get out of here?”
“About another hour or so,” she says. “There’s someone in the waiting room who wants to visit. She says she’s your cousin? She was there when you were attacked?”
My stomach clenches. It must be Leenie. Does that mean Jax is still here somewhere? The only thing I remember about getting here is being wheeled into the emergency room. All the blood must have scared the people at the front desk because they brought me right back. It must be one of those slow nights in the ER where nothing else major is going on. No gunshot wounds or stabbings. Honestly, with the Dragons taking over control, I haven’t heard much going down in the Heights. Not like when the Crew ran it.
“She wants to come back?” I ask as the doctor checks my IV and only makes a small sound of acknowledgment. “Sure,” I tell her, panic fluttering my chest. I figured the three of them would be long gone by now. “She can.”
“I’ll tell the nurse.” The doctor gives me a broad smile and leaves the room.
A few minutes later, heeled boots approach the curtain and hesitate a few moments. It is sort of an awkward situation because there’s nothing to knock on or announce her presence, so instead she calls out, “Um, Sadie, can I come in?”
“Yeah,” I croak out before attempting to clear my throat. The IV is giving me a weird taste in my mouth.
Leenie sidesteps the long drape and locks gazes with me. She gives me a cursory once over before exploring the small area I’m in. She takes in everything, eyes roaming all over the room before sitting in the small plastic chair next to the bed.
When she doesn’t say anything for several moments, I sigh. “Not to be rude but why are you still here?”
She chuckles to herself. “I think we’re all asking ourselves that same question, to be honest. What’s the IV for?”
“Malnourished. Guess I’m not eating well enough.”
I say it in jest but she doesn’t take it that way. She frowns. “Jax said you felt like skin and bones when he picked you up.”
I blink at her. I’m not sure which surprises me more, the fact that he felt that or the fact that he said anything about it. Why would he care?
“Do you want to talk about the situation you’re in?”
I laugh. I can’t help it. Finny’s little girlfriend is asking me about my shit. “Are you serious?”
“Dead serious, actually,” she says, pinning me with a concentrated gaze. “Listen, you and Jax have history. Fucked up history I might add.” She leans back and crosses her arms. “But I guess we’re good people who aren’t going to let someone run back to a dick who beats them.”
“He doesn’t beat me,” I protest, and I don’t even know why. What he does is far worse than punishing me physically.
She pulls her chair closer, the legs scraping over the floor. “I get gang shit,” she whispers harshly. “Finn filled me in on what happened, and call me crazy, but I’m betting you’re a fighter. Not in the literal sense, obviously. The Heights can chew you up and spit you out. Jax got caught in the crossfire, didn’t he? You needed to save your ass so you did what you had to do.”
The fact that she clearly hit the nail on the head surprises me. Instead of showing her, I revert to my defense mechanism. “You don’t know anything about me.”
“Maybe not, but you and I both know Jax would never rape someone, so there was a reason you lied. Finn says you and Jax were the real deal.”
“Maybe I’m just a cunt like that.”
She sits back in her chair, appraising me. “The Heights breeds cunts like wildflowers. There’s no doubt. But why did you come back?”
I roll my eyes, stifling a smile. I knew I liked this girl. In another life, our bestie status would’ve been solid. “I told you guys already. My—”
“Colleagues?” She scoffs. “Were those the assholes that called them out tonight? The same one that gave you all those bruises?”
Her questions are like a yipping dog at my heels. I flex my fingers in frustration. “Is Jax still out there?”
“Why do you want to know?” she fires back.
Frustration lances through me. “Forget it. Are we done here? You stayed all this time just to ask me those questions?”
“No, I stayed because there’s no way in hell you’re going back to that psycho tonight. And no, Jax isn’t here.” She nibbles her lip when she says that, and I try to gauge her reaction but I don’t know her well enough to understand what she’s thinking. My heart sinks with the knowledge that Jax is gone though. He didn’t stay. I mean, of course he wouldn’t but I don’t know. For a second there, I thought I could see a slice of the way we used to be. Him slinging me over his shoulder when I didn’t do what he said. The way he looked me over when we were back in the Ring as if he was checking to see if I was okay. He was protective almost.
I guess Leenie is right about asking me that question. What the fuck am I doing here? Am I being Psycho’s bitch? Or am I playing out my fantasies where one day Jax forgives me?
I growl in frustration and then hit the button for the nurse.
“What are you doing?” Leenie asks.
“Leaving.”
“They’re still treating you.”
I laugh. “I’ve lived for years the way I am. If malnutrition was going to kill me, it would’ve had the decency to do it already.” When no one comes immediately, I yell, “Nurse!” loud enough to be heard over the cartoon blaring in the other room.
A hand throws the curtain back, and one of the guys who first brought me in sticks his head in. His brows are pinched like he’s had a long night, and he’d really like to tell me to go fuck myself but he smiles blandly instead. “What can I do for you?”
“I want to leave. Take this IV out.” My mind is a jumbled mess. I have no idea where I would even go. What am I doing? Going back to the storage facility tonight? Not fucking likely. Psycho thinks I’m going to be with Jax and if I show up without the information he wants, he’ll kick my ass.
But I can’t go with Leenie. Where? To Jax’s house? Please.
Even as I think it, that’s what my heart longs for. So many good memories in that house. So many peaceful, quiet nights. Some other type of nights too—sensual ones—but I was never afraid there. Not until I got caught.
“Let me get with the doctor.”
“No. Now,” I demand.
“You’ll at least have to wait until I get the discharge papers.”
Before I can even respond, he turns his back and walks away. I scream in frustration and start peeling up the tape that they used to keep the IV down.
“Jesus, Sadie. You’re not going to tear the freaking IV out. Just wait.”
“Easy for you to say. You ever not had anywhere to go?” I sneer in her direction, looking her up and down. I can tell from looking at her that she doesn’t have the same background as me. She’s never had to lie, cheat, or steal to get by. She’s never had to lose herself.
“If you don’t have anywhere to go, why are you in such a hurry to get out of here?”
I open my mouth to retort but I just stand there like a gaping fish. I honestly have no idea. I only know I don’t want to be here.
She smiles. “Thought so.”
I lift my hand and flip her off. She shrugs like she could give a shit. I sigh. “I bet you and Finn get along well.” From what I can see, she’s just what he needs. He’s so laid back and she’s feistier.
A dreamy look takes over her eyes, and I remember that feeling well. “Finn... Finn’s... Everything,” she finishes.
I almost snort. “You missed him in his teens. He was a bit of a dork.”
She leans forward, a grin pulling at her lips. “Not possible.”
“Totally possible. Picture him minus all those new muscles he has. Shorter. He had this floppy hair like Nick from the Backstreet Boys. It wasn’t a good look for him.”
She laughs, the sound echoing around the small space. “What about Jax?”
“Jax always looked gorgeous,” I say, my voice turning wistful. I bring up an image of him in my head. I’m staring at the pocked ceiling in the emergency room but instead, all I see is Jax back when we were the only thing the other needed. “Less tattoos. A little less muscle.”
“Still with an attitude?”
I laugh. “His attitude knows no bounds. I swear he hates everyone.”
“Sounds like it got worse after you.”
My hands turn to fists.
“No offense,” she adds.
“None taken,” I whisper. “Are you here just to suss me out or what?”
Leenie shakes her head. “No, I’m here because I saw a girl in trouble. A creep beat up my best friend, and call me crazy, but I don’t like to see that happen to anyone else, even if the girl is a gigantic liar who ruined someone’s life.”
I go to run my hand through my hair but I end up stopping when the tubes pull against the side of the hospital bed. “Sounds like you’re a lot more forgiving than Jax.”
“Well, you didn’t send me to jail, did you?”
I smirk. “Well, we don’t know each other well enough for that.”
The joke falls flat and silence enters the room, covering us like a shroud.
“You loved him,” Leenie states.
“More than anything.”
And those are the truest words I’ve spoken in years.
