Someone Exactly Like Me by Debbie Cromack

22

Nicco

Another restless night as Destiny dominates my every thought. More powerful than my physical desire are the emotions pulsing through me. She’s wrong. I don’t want her just because she won’t let me have her. I want her because she makes me see the world differently. She makes me see myself differently. She has a way of bringing out the beauty in everything and everyone around her. She’s fucking addicting.

And she’s leaving. Worse than that, I can’t make her stay. I have no right to think I could.

The air between us is polite, tense, as we eat breakfast. After we clean up the kitchen, we meet in the living room, bags packed. I drive us to where we’re meeting Marco with his boat to bring us over to Ponza. She’s uncomfortably quiet. I went too far last night. Resisting her is growing increasingly difficult. But I have to. I told her I’d always respect her wishes.

When we board, Marco and I take our bags below deck and Destiny sits on one side of the cockpit. As we get underway, I sit next to Marco, giving her some space. He and I chat as he drives while she looks over the water, her beautiful face etched with sadness. About an hour in, I can’t take the ache in my heart.

Sitting next to her, I take her hand in mine, expecting her to withdraw it. She doesn’t.

“I’m sorry.” I turn my body toward her, putting my other hand on top of hers. “I sometimes find it hard to control myself around you.” I look briefly down at our hands and chuckle softly, returning my eyes to hers. “You don’t make it easy on me.”

She shakes her head. “You don’t need to apologize.” The sweetest smile lifts her mouth. “Let’s enjoy the next few days.”

I smile and nod. “We’ll be there soon.” I lean in and kiss her forehead.

When we arrive at their house, Angelina has lunch prepared for us and invites Destiny for an afternoon of shopping after they drop Franco at her sister’s house for a sleepover. Once they’re gone, Marco and I pour ourselves some wine and play a game of pool.

“So, what’s going on with you two?” he asks, cracking the cue ball into the two-ball, knocking it into the corner pocket.

I groan. “It’s so fucked up.”

“Fucked up how?” He takes a drag of his cigarette. “Seems like things are good with the hand-holding I’ve seen. What’s the last few days been like?”

“She’s unbelievable, this woman. I told you, I’ve never met anyone like her.”

“You do have a track record for dating gorgeous but nasty women who treat you like shit.”

“Don’t I know it.” I get out a cigarette and light it. “You know what she told me?”

“What?”

“She told me I’m good with kids.”

He snaps up his head from his bent over position to line up his shot. “I could’ve told you that because you’re great with Franco, but I know after Ana, you didn’t believe it.” He takes a drag.

“Bro, I fucking know. I ended up telling her about Ana and showing her the letter.”

“Holy fuck.” He straightens himself then sits on the edge of the pool table, scratching his forehead with the thumb of his hand holding his cigarette, staring at me. “What happened?”

“It just came out of me and then yesterday, I took her to the beach and she had me do some kind of burning ceremony thing and I burned the fucking letter.” I hold an imaginary piece of paper in my hand and flick my lighter beneath it. “She had me say some phrases and I almost lost my fucking shit. It’s gone.” I shake my head. “I’ve never felt anything so powerful.” I suck in my gray death. “Her dad is going to try to find Ana and my child. He has connections from his job.”

“No way. That’s amazing.”

“I know. I can’t believe it. And last night, we painted together. I never painted with anyone before. I liked it.”

“What’s happening to you?” He chuckles, getting up from the edge of the table. “Seriously, it’s great to hear you like this, man. I’m happy for you.” He goes back to lining up his shot.

“Don’t be too happy. It all ends when she leaves.” My heart pinches as I say the words.

With one smooth stroke, the cue ball tips the three-ball into the side pocket. “Why?”

“Because it does. It has to. That’s what she wants. It’s what I’m supposed to want. But I don’t.”

“Then tell her.”

“There’s nothing I can say. Trust me.”

“You’re going to give up? Just like that?” He glares at me.

“She lives halfway across the world. What do you want me to do? Besides, she won’t have sex with me so she can’t be too into me.”

He jolts up from eyeing his next shot. “You still haven’t fucked?” One eyebrow raises high above the other.

“No, man. She won’t let me. My balls have been fucking blue since I met her. I’m fucking craving her.” I shake my head, for the first time realizing I don’t want another woman. I only want Destiny. And I can’t have her.

“Damn, bro.”

“Tell me about it.”

“Look.” He spreads his legs, holding his stick in both hands in front of him. “You’re my little brother and I’ve seen you go through a lot of shit. I haven’t seen you this happy since we were kids, flying down the middle of Vicolo del Malpasso in our wobbly go-karts with Lorenzo and Marcello, lucky we didn’t split our heads open on the cobblestones.” He chuckles. “Tell her how you feel. Figure out a way to make it work.” He leans down, eyeballing his shot, and clacks the five-ball into the corner pocket. “And for fuck’s sake, fuck each other.” He blows smoke out as he laughs.

When Angelina and Destiny return, we have dinner together and they tell us about their afternoon while I have to confess that Marco whooped me at pool. As we clean up from dinner, Angelina suggests we meet back at the pool for a night swim and drinks.

Marco and I are at their bar, pouring wine for ourselves and lining up shots of amaro when Angelina comes out and lights candles around the patio. She opens a chest and takes out four towels, putting one on each lounge chair. When she’s done, she joins us at the bar. Destiny walks out, covered in her oversized sweatshirt, her hair twisted on top of her head, and joins us.

“Would you like your s’mores martini?” I ask Destiny.

“I don’t know what that is, but I like the sound of it,” Angelina says. “Will you make me one?”

“Yeah.”

“Okay, I’ll have one,” Destiny says.

Stepping behind the bar, I make their martinis and put them in front of them next to their shots.

Angelina wiggles in her seat. “I want to say the toast,” she says, holding up her shot glass.

Marco nods and gestures his open hand toward her.

“I want to toast Destiny.” She smiles warmly. “Thank you for coming here to be part with our family. Salute.”

With the ladies in their chairs and Marco and I standing in front of them, we raise our glasses in the center, saying, “Salute” in unison then down our shots.

Marco and I get in the pool while Angelina and Destiny sit at the bar sipping their martinis. After a few minutes, Angelina brings her drink over to the pool, sets it on the edge, and gets in. Destiny follows, also setting her glass on the edge of the pool. When she lifts her sweatshirt over her head, I’m grateful my body is under water because I’m immediately hard.

“Your suit is so cute,” Angelina says.

“Oh, thank you. My friend Candi snuck it into my luggage,” she says, quickly getting into the pool, but not before I get a look at her sexy body and the thong up her tight ass.

Fuck me.

“You guys, this is amazing,” she says, sinking into the water, looking out at the view.

Marco and Angelina’s villa overlooks the ocean with mountains to the right. Stonework and lush greenery surround the pool and patio. And the most unique part is the front glass wall of the pool. From under the water, you can look out into the ocean. As the sun is almost fully down, the candles Angelina lit earlier cast a warm glow across the patio.

“Thank you,” Angelina says. “This view and the pool are one of the main reasons we bought the villa.”

“I can see why.”

“Come.” Angelina takes her martini and glides through the water to the glass wall.

Destiny does the same, meeting her at the wall. They sip their drinks and Angelina points out some things in the village below.After the ladies finish their drinks, Angelina announces she’s going in and Marco goes with her.

Before he gets out, he looks at me, looks toward Destiny, and cocks his head to the side. I know exactly the message he’s sending, but I’m not going there, no matter how hard I am or how much I desire her. Destiny’s made herself very clear.

Moving through the water, I stand next to her. “Do you want another martini?”

She looks up at me. “That’s probably not a good idea.” A devious smile lifts her cheeks. “We both know I don’t make the best decisions around you when I’m tipsy and I’ve already had wine with dinner, a shot, and a martini.”

I chuckle, take my wine in my hand, and slide closer to her. We rest our arms on top of the glass wall, I let my body relax deeper into the water.

“How are things going with Vance? Do you have any projects lined up yet?”

“He has some leads on a few parts and I’m waiting to hear about audition possibilities.”

“He’s really good. I have a feeling he’ll have you lined up with something soon.”

“I hope so. I’m excited to keep moving my career forward.” I sip my wine.

“What speaks more to your heart, acting or your music?”

“I love acting. I love putting myself into a character. But, when I’m acting, I’m playing a role someone else created. When I sing, it’s my words, my music, my soul. Nothing can really compare to that. Music was my first my passion, it grounds me.”

“Mmm. Your passion definitely comes through when you sing. When do I get to hear your new song?” Sinking her arms beneath the water, she pushes herself off the wall toward the center of the pool.

Setting my wine aside, I move toward her. “Soon. It’s not ready yet.”

“Okay.” She tilts her head back into the water, extends her arms, and brings her knees up, pushing the water back and forth with her hands and arms.

“What are you doing?” She looks like a squirmy fish.

“This is how I float.” She continues pumping her arms against the water. “I can’t float, I just sink, so this is the best I can do.”

“This is not floating.” I can’t help but laugh a little, she’s so cute. “When you float, you’re relaxed. This is not relaxed.” I point at her, shaking my head and crossing one arm over my chest, resting my other arm on it and stroking my chin.

She stops pumping the water, lets her legs sink, and stands on the bottom of the pool, the water hitting just below her shoulders. “Well, it’s the only way I know how to do it.”

“Here.” I step toward her. “I’ll help you.”

She tilts her head, pressing her lips together into a thin line.

“I promise to behave.” Even though I want to touch every inch of your body. “Lean back.”

Without another word, she leans back. I place one hand on her back and the other on the back of her legs. She’s stiff at first, moving her arms in the water.

“You don’t need to push the water. I’m holding you. I won’t let you sink.”

It takes her about a minute to fully relax into the water, into my hands. She closes her eyes, surrendering. Making my movements slow, I glide her body through the water, watching the ripples extend away.

Burning the time that passes into my memory, I focus on the music filling my ears, the feel of her skin on my hands, the sight of her nipples atop her breasts cresting out of the water.

When she finally moves, I slide one arm up on her back and the other under her knees, cradling her. She loops her arms around my neck, the movement brings her face close to mine.

Fuck, I want to kiss her.

With her body curled into my arms, I swish her gently through the water, desperate to feel her lips on mine again. I promised to behave. I can’t break that promise. I don’t want to lose her trust.

“I was thinking for tomorrow, I could take you into town during the day and then we can go to supper.”

“Okay. I’d like to write in the morning. Will I have time for that?”

“Yes, of course. We have no schedule.”

“Okay.” Her eyes flick to my lips. “I should, probably get some sleep,” she says, but doesn’t move from my arms. “Thank you.” She pauses. “I enjoyed this.”

“So did I.” All I’d have to do is bend my neck down to capture her lips. My pulse races.

“Buona notte,” she hushes, pulling herself up to kiss my cheek. My fingers tense into her flesh as she does.

It takes all my willpower not to kiss her. She unwraps her arms from my neck and I release her body.

“Buona notte.”

“Are you coming in?”

“Uh.” Not with my hard-on ready to rip through my swim trunks. “I need a cigarette first.”

“Okay.” She climbs the steps out of the pool.

Every movement of her body has my attention. When she reaches the top step, she turns, catching me staring.

She towels off and goes inside. I grab my cigarettes and focus on deflating my dick.

Destiny

I swear my heartbeat sounded like a sonar ping under the water when he held me floating. Thank goodness for the alcohol or I probably would’ve been trembling in his arms from my nerves. He had several opportunities to cross my boundaries and he didn’t. I’m impressed. With my arms around his neck, our lips so close, and his gaze steaming with desire, I wanted to cross my own damn boundaries.

I dry my hair, put on my pajamas, and turn out the light. Waves of candlelight reflecting off the pool dance on my ceiling. Going over to the window, I carefully move the curtain aside, peeking out. It’s strange to think about who he is and the fact that, ten minutes ago, his arms were wrapped around my body. Millions of women would kill to be me. During our moments of tender intimacy, it’s like he’s all mine. The world fades and the women lusting after him aren’t even a thought in my mind. It’s just me and him.

But the painful truth is, he’s not mine.