Bodie by Nyssa Kathryn

Chapter 11

Bodie knocked on Maya’s door.

The memory of last night’s kiss was still fresh in his mind. The feel of her body wrapped around his…it damn near lit a fire in his veins that was impossible to extinguish.

Light shuffling sounded from inside the house, then he heard a small gasp from the other side of the door. He swallowed a chuckle, assuming she’d just seen him through the peephole.

The door slowly crept open, stopping partway. He saw only half of Maya. The other half remained behind the wood. It was still enough to have his jaw dropping.

Maya wore a towel. Water droplets slid down her chest while her wet hair flowed over her shoulders.

“What are you doing here?”

Right now, he was just trying to control his burning libido.

He ran a hand through his hair, using every ounce of self-control he possessed to keep his mind off the fact that she was likely naked under that towel.

“Can I tell you after you get dressed?” So I don’t do something that will have you running hard and fast from me. “I can wait out here if you like?”

Maya looked down, almost like she’d forgotten she was only wearing a towel. There was no way Bodie would have missed it.

“Oh. Sorry. Yes, I need to get dressed. Come in and wait in the living room. I don’t want you freezing.”

Bodie barely felt the cold at the best of times. Right now, he was as far from cold as it got. Stepping inside, he closed the door after him. He didn’t bother stepping over the thread. He didn’t want Maya to know that he’d noticed. It might disturb her perception of its ability to create safety.

Maya moved to the bedroom while Bodie stood in the living room. He waited until he heard the click of the door closing before breathing out a pained breath.

Christ, the woman just about undid him. She tested every shred of self-restraint he had.

Walking over to the couch, he put down the jacket he’d brought before casting his gaze around the room. This was his second time inside, and he still hated that she lived here. The place smelled of dampness and mold, and paint was peeling off the walls. If it hadn’t been for Bodie, the house wouldn’t even have adequate heating.

The landlord had to be a real asshole to rent it out in its current condition. Probably why he’d let a single woman with no identification live there. Because no one else would want it.

The only thing that made Bodie feel better was the knowledge that Maya wouldn’t be here for long. Not if he got what he wanted.

His attention shifted as Maya walked out of the bedroom. She wore a white turtleneck sweater and tight blue jeans that showed off her toned, athletic legs.

“You look amazing.” There was no way he could keep that thought to himself.

A rosy-pink color tinged her cheeks. “It’s just a sweater and jeans.”

Bodie had a feeling the woman looked stunning in anything. “It just so happens that both of us have late shifts today. I was hoping you were free to spend the day with me.”

He heard the slight increase in her heart rate. He only just suppressed the smile that threatened to pull at his lips.

“I am…free, that is.”

Good.

Lifting the jacket, he handed it to Maya.

Her brow furrowed. “What’s this?”

“An old snow jacket of mine. Doesn’t fit me anymore, so I’d like you to have it.”

That wasn’t entirely true. He’d actually purchased it a few days ago just for her. He’d intentionally bought a large one to validate his story.

Maya was already shaking her head. “I can’t take your jacket.”

Bodie stepped forward and pressed it into her hands. “If you don’t take the jacket, we’ll both miss out on today’s fun.” There was no way he was taking her out in the snow without a warm jacket. Where he only required a sweater, Maya needed a hell of a lot more.

Her gaze dropped to his lips for a moment. He itched to lower his head. Touch his lips to hers.

“What’s today?” she asked, eyes returning to his.

Raising a finger, he trailed it along her cheekbone, loving the way she subtly pressed her face closer to his touch. “It’s the first day of snow. I was hoping you’d take a gondola lift to the top of Keystone Mountain with me. We can watch the snowfall together.”

There was a flash of excitement on her face before she tried to mask it. She didn’t do a very good job. Bodie liked that. It meant he could trust what he saw.

“You want to go on a gondola ride with me? To watch the snow?”

“I do. Absolutely.” He didn’t know why the woman was surprised. He thought he’d made his feelings abundantly clear last night.

Maya’s tongue slipped out to wet her bottom lip. This time it was Bodie staring at her mouth. “I’d love to.”

She’d barely gotten her words out when his self-restraint snapped. He dipped his head, pressing his lips to hers. Maya moaned deep in her throat and leaned into his body.

This kiss wasn’t the same as last night. It wasn’t slow and exploratory. It was deep and intense. Christ, she tasted good. Tasted. Felt. Everything about the woman was amazing.

Bodie moved his hand from her cheek to her neck. Maya’s hands pressed to his chest before gliding down, causing him to harden to an unbearable degree.

Bodie kissed her like a desperate man. Like he would never get enough of her…which he probably wouldn’t.

Seconds passed…then minutes. Eventually, he knew that he needed to end it. If he didn’t, he’d be doing a lot more than kissing her.

Lifting his head, he felt the resistance from Maya. “You test my self-control like no one ever has before.”

Maya opened her eyes to stare up at him. They were glazed over with lust. “Why does kissing you feel so right?”

Who the hell knew, but Bodie felt it as well. “It feels right to me, too.”

For a moment, Maya didn’t speak. Then, slowly, she untangled herself from him.

Bending down, Bodie lifted the jacket, which had fallen to the ground. “Do you need anything else before we go?”

Maya looked like she wanted to say something. If the woman said “him,” then all bets were off. He’d be taking her right there and then.

“No. I’m ready to go.”

Squashing the disappointment, Bodie smiled and headed for the door. It was better this way. He wanted to tell Maya the truth before they got any deeper. The truth about who he was and why he was in Keystone.

* * *

Good lord,they were high up.

Maya had never been on a gondola lift before. If she was completely honest with herself, it was a bit terrifying. Especially sitting beside a man who had to weigh over two hundred pounds.

Was it possible their combined weights would snap the cable?

“Relax.” Bodie whispered the word in her ear. It sent a tingle down her spine.

“You’re sure this is safe?”

“I would go so far as to argue that it’s safer up here than on the ground.”

She gave him a skeptical look. “How is that?”

He lifted a shoulder. “No chance of disappearing under a layer of snow.”

Maya laughed. “Okay, but if this thing breaks, it’s going to send us straight into the snow anyway.” And it would be ten times harder to get out because they’d probably have broken limbs.

Why did her mind always take her to worst-case scenario?

“Focus on the snow that’s falling around us.”

It was pretty magnificent. Small, fluffy snowflakes fell from the sky in a steady stream. The grass on the ground had been covered quickly.

“Have you been on a gondola lift before?” she asked.

“I have. When I was in high school, we went on a ski trip. It was awesome.”

She couldn’t imagine teenage Bodie. In her mind, he was and always had been six and a half feet of muscle, and all man.

“Did you enjoy school?”

His smile grew wide and was nothing but genuine. “Loved it. School meant football, and football was my entire life as a teenager. I was even offered scholarships at a few colleges to play once I graduated.”

That wasn’t a surprise to her. The man looked like he would excel at any physical endeavor. “Which college did you choose?”

“None.”

None? Why would anyone turn down a scholarship?

As if hearing her thoughts, Bodie began to explain. “This is going to sound sappy, but I felt like there was something more out there for me.”

“That doesn’t sound sappy. It sounds like something didn’t feel right and you trusted your gut.”

Bodie reached for her hand and threaded his fingers through hers. Even though they were both wearing gloves, she could still feel an influx of warmth transfer from his hand.

“That’s exactly how it was.” He studied her face. “What about you? Did you always know what you wanted to do?”

It was more like Maya knew how to survive. She didn’t have parents who had saved a college fund for her, just like she didn’t have a family to live with while she figured things out.

“I didn’t have a lot of options. I was good at science. Tutoring during high school allowed me to earn some money. I was lucky that a couple of colleges offered me full scholarships.” She shrugged. “I was very lucky.”

She repeated those words because she often needed to remind herself of the fact. A lot of people who grew up in foster care weren’t lucky at all.

Bodie’s expression sobered. “It sounds more like hard work than luck. I’m sorry your childhood wasn’t great.”

It wasn’t. The feeling of being unsafe had unfortunately been her reality in more than a few homes. The constant, though, no matter which home she went to, was the lack of love and connection.

“I never knew any different. I don’t remember my parents. Foster families treated me well enough.” Most of them.

Bodie shook his head. “You deserved more than ‘well enough.’ You deserved consistency of care. Love.”

Maya swallowed hard. She’d given up on that dream a long time ago. “We don’t choose the life we’re born into. We just do the best we can with the one we’re given.”

Growing up, she’d, of course, realized that her life was different than those of her peers. There were many times she’d craved what others had. It had taken her years to come to terms with the fact she never would.

Bodie scrubbed his free hand over his face, like he was in pain. “I want to tell you something. Something important.”

A sliver of fear crept down her spine at his words. Was it something bad? Wasn’t that how all bad admissions began? Swallowing, she nodded. “Okay, but before you do, I need to admit something to you first. Something that you probably already know, but if I say it out loud, then you don’t need to wonder.”

His expression didn’t change. “You can tell me anything.”

She didn’t quite feel like she could tell him “anything.” But she wanted to tell him this.

“I’m not completely okay right now.” Understatement of the century. “Most days I feel like I’m on the edge of an iceberg, waiting for the ground to melt beneath my feet. Or for waves to push me into the icy ocean.”

She felt Bodie’s hand tighten on hers.

“I feel…fragile.”

Like the smallest thing can break me.

When he remained silent, Maya hurried to continue. “So, what I’m trying to say is, everything kind of scares me to death right now…including my feelings for you.”

Love wasn’t familiar to her. Love had never been a part of her past. She’d literally been running for her life for months, and everything about the idea of falling for someone scared the crap out of her.

Bodie remained silent for another beat before he spoke. “I understand, Maya. You can’t handle any big curveballs in your life right now. Thank you for being honest and open with me.”

As she studied his face, she realized that something had changed from a minute ago. His features had become a little more closed off. “I’m sorry, maybe I shouldn’t have told you that.”

He shook his head. “Like I said earlier, you can tell me anything.”

“What was it you wanted to tell me?”

He hesitated. Almost as if he was trying to decide on his next words. “That I’m grateful to have met you.”

Maya was almost certain that those were not the words he’d been intending to say.

He lowered his head a fraction. “I’m really glad you shared that with me. If you ever need to share anything else, I’m a great listener.”

Maya was tempted. So damn tempted. But if she told him her whole truth, she would be doing nothing but putting him in danger. It would be entirely selfish on her part.

She forced a smile. “Thank you.”

Dipping his head, Bodie kissed her. But it wasn’t the same kiss as that morning. No, that kiss had been without hesitation. All lust and desire. This one was riddled with insecurities. Unspoken secrets.