Luna Rising by Sloane Murphy
Chapter Nine
“Ithink you should take this next week to visit with some other packs before your birthday,” Dad says in between bites of his breakfast. He gives me a look filled with significance before continuing, “It’ll be a great opportunity for you to see how other packs function.”
I chew, frantic to protest despite the mega-mouthful of food I’m trying to swallow around. No one’s ever accused my dad of being anything less than shrewd when necessary. Of course he waited until my mouth was too full to talk to start this particular conversation. Apparently spending the day with him and then broaching the subject of possibly moving into a place of my own has cemented in his mind that “Luna’s finally accepting fate.”
He’s gone completely and totally full steam ahead. I’m still struggling to swallow my mouthful, desperate to point out that he totally brushed over the whole moving out thing. I narrow my eyes as I reach for my coffee mug—maybe washing down my toast will help me get to the words I’m struggling to spit out. I’ve never seen him so happy, and honestly, it’s a little frustrating. I understand that he’s ecstatic that I’ve started coming around to the idea of being Alpha, but I’m still not quite there yet.
“Hey, maybe you could try being happy that she’s coming around and start with some baby steps,” Mom interjects as I’m swallowing a mouthful of coffee and soggy toast. Thank fuck for her being on my side for once. “Try to remember how you felt at her age.”
“That was a long-ass time ago,” he says, frowning.
“Yeah, and look at how long it took you to come around to the idea of being an Alpha,” I point out, and he retreats back into his metaphorical box with a gruff ‘fine.’ I smile at Mom and she returns it. No words are needed for my thanks for her backing me up.
We finish breakfast in a mostly companionable silence, and I opt for a quick shower right after since I ran before we ate. I run through my mental to do list for the week while I shower, trying to sort my week in my head as I run conditioner through my long white-blonde hair. I’m sure most people look forward to their twenty-first birthday—there’s something thrilling about all the new possibilities that come with the birthday. But the constant reminder that my birthday is only a week away is enough to give me hives. There’s a full moon on Thursday, Remy and company arrive on Friday for my actual birthday, and then there’s the party on Saturday.
I’m going to be up to my neck in pack responsibilities and expectations this week, and I already know it’s going to be seven long days of full-on peopling. If I left now, I could probably get away with hiding out for the week. The thought of going wolf and hiding in the vast grounds of the forest surrounding the compound sounds so goddamn appealing right now.
“Hey, sweetheart.” I jump around, clutching at my towel around my body as my mom enters my room. I really need to get my own place, dammit. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you. I was just coming to let you know that we’re taking some food over to the community center for the family there, and then your dad is heading out with Thatch to see where we can find space for three more houses before the expansion. We thought you might like to come with us.”
I smile at her because as much as I’d like to hide from everyone, I feel weirdly responsible for Arrow and his family. “Sure thing, Mom. Just let me get dressed, and I’ll be down.”
“Okay, don’t take too long.” The door clicks as she pulls it shut, and I drop onto the stool at my dresser. It doesn’t take too long to dry my hair thanks to my amazing hair dryer. Nova got it for me for Christmas last year, and it’s been an absolute godsend—the thing might as well be a Dyson for how quickly it dries my hair. I dress quickly in jeans and a cute graphic tee before pulling my hair up into a ponytail and heading downstairs.
I find Mom and Dad in the kitchen waiting for me. “Good, you’re ready. Let’s go.”
Mom loads my arms up with more boxes and trays than I dare to count before I even get the chance to speak. I bite back my complaint when she does the same to Dad before wordlessly, albeit cheerfully as hell, leading the way to the community center. It’s early enough in the day that the square is still full of families as the kids make their way to school. Mom stops to talk to so many people that by the time we reach the community center, my arms shake with the effort of lugging all this food around.
When we arrive with the packages, it’s Arrow’s wife, Amanda, who greets us. Mom quickly explains everything that’s in the boxes, and the new Lycan woman looks on the verge of tears. “This is so amazing; you didn’t have to do this,” she exclaims quietly, and I can’t help the smile that stretches my lips as Mom waves her off.
She hugs her tightly instead, rubbing her back. “Don’t be silly. You’re pack.” She says it like that explains everything, and the other women who have begun to gather around look like they might cry too. I know that not every pack is like ours, but I can’t imagine a home life so broken that you’d cry because people brought you food. How bad was their last pack?
Maybe Dad’s right. Maybe we should go visit some of the other packs. I know Roman has been trying to stomp some archaic shit out, but he can’t be everywhere at once. I’m fully fucking bewildered by the fact that a small act of human decency has made them so emotional.
I say hello to everyone, offering to help to get the kids off to school, before Dad reins me in. “You want to come scout out some space for these houses with me?”
“Sure, that’d be fun.” I’ve never really considered architecture being something I might enjoy, and I honestly probably don’t really care about it, but these houses… these ones I’m going to have fun helping with.
* * *
“Are you sure we can fit three houses in that space before the expansion?” I ask Dad for the umpteenth time as he passes me the bowl of mashed potatoes. Mom rolls her eyes as she brings the steaks over to the table. We’ve been talking about the houses and space incessantly since we got home, and if she wasn’t smiling down at us with so much pride and love in her eyes, I might think she was annoyed at how much of the conversation the topic has dominated.
“It’ll be a squeeze, and there won’t be much in the way of yards until we expand. But if they’re happy to share the space around the houses, they should be fine,” he says as he forks a steak onto my plate before spearing his own. His smile is nothing but pride as he glances toward where I’m cutting voraciously into my steak. “It’s nice to see you so invested in all of this.”
I take a bite of my steak and groan. I don’t know what Mom does to them, but I can never make them taste as good as she does. To be fair, my cooking skills are pretty abysmal. “Arrow and his family kind of feel like my responsibility since you handed me the decision to let them seek refuge here or not.”
“Wait, you did what?” Mom narrows her eyes at Dad, and he shrugs, smiling widely at her. Oops, I figured she already knew that, considering how involved she’s been in getting them settled in.
“She handled it beautifully. You would have been proud.” He beams at me, and she shakes her head before sitting down opposite me. She looks super concerned, which is purely because she’s an awesome mom, but sometimes I wish she’d see that I’m not a kid. I mean, I know in like immortal terms I’m a baby, but I’m not a brat.
“It was fine, Mom,” I reassure her. “Arrow pleaded his case, I weighed it against the issues it could bring to the pack and made a decision. It made me realize I can help people by staying here rather than gallivanting around the world as you’re so fond of calling it.”
“I’m glad to hear you say that, Luna. I just don’t want your father pushing you when you’re not ready for it.”
“I’ll never know if I’m ready for anything if I don’t try it,” I counter, feeling strongly about this subject, despite being adamant before that the Alpha life wasn’t for me. Dad has always left his Beta spot open. Thatcher fills the role in a way, but it’s not official. He was keeping it open for me. The same way Roman didn’t replace him and has been waiting for Maddox to officially take up the mantle. Remy was right. Our fathers’ expectations aren’t small.
“The girl has a point.” My dad grins, seeming way too pleased with himself.
“Speaking of which, this girl would like to revisit getting her own place. If we’re building anyway, would it be hard to add another building in? I mean I don’t need anything big, but it would be nice to have my own space.” Mom puts her cutlery down and crosses her hands under her chin while Dad just stares at me. We briefly touched on this conversation once already, but it got swept aside in the whole ‘Luna isn’t running away from us anymore’ thing. I’m not going to let up, even if they’re determined to try to ignore it.
If I’m staying with the pack, I can’t keep living with my parents. I’m almost twenty-one. A girl needs some independence.
“Luna, maybe you should wait until we expand the compound,” Dad says thoughtfully. As an afterthought, he adds, “Or until you find your mate.”
“Dad, we are not swapping one issue for another. I do not want to find my mate yet. I’m just coming around to the idea of staying here and that I can help our people. Please stop pushing everything.” I push my chair back, my frustration growing exponentially by the second. “Mom, dinner was great, but I’m done. Thanks.”
I leave through the back door and head into the forest behind the house. I walk until I hit the river then drop onto the mossy stones, screaming out my anger somewhat dramatically. Why can’t he ever just be happy with a win? He always has to keep fucking pushing. What if I don’t find my mate, then what? Does that make me some sort of loser? Nothing but a failure of a Lycan in his eyes? I totally get that he didn’t find his mate until later in life and that it changed his whole fucking world, but I am not him. I just wish he’d stop trying to repeat history with my life.
Except if I tell him he’s acting like Grandpa, then he’d shut up, but that would start a whole other argument. I’ve got enough shit bubbling around in my head right now, including this stupid party that I agreed to because he wouldn’t stop hounding me, without bringing that shit up too.
Fuck my life. I hate being a whiny bitch, even if it’s just inside my own head.
Screw it.
I strip out of my clothes, tucking them to one side of a tree near the water line where I was pouting, and shift. The pain is momentary, gone in a flash before I let my wolf take over. Responsibilities don’t mean shit to her. I push my snout into the air, howling with a deep, keening anger before pulling back from consciousness so I’m merely watching life through the eyes of my wolf.
She’s so happy to be free that she bounces around the open space, and I feel bad for not running as much lately. I swear these last few weeks have been one thing after the other. We pick up the scent of a rabbit and lollop through the trees happily, chasing it until we catch it, and I turn my mind off as my wolf feeds.
After we’ve hunted, we run and run and run until we reach the edge of pack land. That's when I hear the baying howls of other Lycans.
Since I’m no longer alone in the trees, I head back to where I tucked my clothes away, shifting back and dressing quickly. My anger is still there, rippling just under the surface of my skin, but it doesn’t feel like it’s going to swallow me whole anymore.
I slink back into the house, avoiding my parents and the shouting match they’re having in the basement before heading up to my room and flopping face down onto my bed.
There’s going to be a day where everything in my life won’t be a fight… right?
* * *
There’s something about lying on the roof, staring up at the night sky and listening to the baying of wolves as they play in the forest, that I find soothing. The official pack run isn’t until tomorrow, but since the attack last month, Dad has ramped up security. So those who are staying behind tomorrow to make sure the compound is protected are running tonight. There’s an air of unease within the pack as the full moon draws closer since there has been little to no information about the attack.
I know Uncle Roman has been trying to suss out information, but it seems that whatever rogue population exists is small, and it’s easy to hide in this big world if you really don’t want to be found. Since the group that attacked us mostly perished—and those who did survive have since succumbed to death—there aren’t many options left for us.
Which means everyone has been chasing their tails trying to dredge up even a whisper of information about the rogues. We’re desperate to figure out whether it was a one-off or if there are even more rogues out there, biding their time as we scramble to find them. There’s always the chance that those who attacked us were the full contingent and that’s why we can’t find anything, but Dad isn’t running that risk. I can’t say I blame him considering the number of injuries and deaths on our side. I’d probably do the same thing.
A howl sounds in the night, and the keening noise is so sad it breaks my heart. I don’t know which Lycan it is by sound alone, but the thought that any of the wolves in our pack being that despaired, hurts. I just hope whoever it is has someone with them who can help them.
My phone chimes in my pocket, so I slide it out just to see Maddox’s smiling face on my screen. As if he’s FaceTiming me right now. I swipe on the screen, and he grins down at me. “Why are you calling so late?”
“Why are you answering so late?” I roll my eyes at his glibness, just as a shooting star catches my eye, making me smile. Of course he thinks the smile is for him. “I just wanted to let you know that Mom announced we’re headed to your place early. We’ll be there tomorrow instead of Friday. I know we’re doing the whole gift giving thing on Friday, but Dad wanted to be there for the run, and they just decided to bring the whole gang early. I think Dad just called Theron to let him know, so I imagine your mom is going to fully freak out in the morning, going full prep mode. I’m sure she’s already pretty crazy with party planning, so I wanted to give you the heads up.”
He takes a breath, and I blink at the amount of information he just gave me. They’re coming two days early. My mom is going to have a conniption. The guest house next to ours isn’t ready yet, she hadn’t planned on getting it sorted out until tomorrow since we’ve had so much going on. I groan at the thought of just how busy my day tomorrow is bound to be.
“Thanks, I guess.” I can already hear Mom in my head, screeching at me to get out of bed at the ass crack of dawn to get shit done. “I’m telling you, I really need to get my own place soon. Then I can hide from all of this stuff.”
“You’re finally going to move out?” There’s an accusatory tone to his voice that I don’t like.
“You can shut it, all of you guys still live at home too.” I push myself to a sitting position so my arm doesn’t go dead holding my phone up in the air.
“Yeah, but you’re older than all of us.” I flip him the bird and let out a deep sigh.
“I’m only just a little older than Raze,” I counter, and he grins.
“Yeah, and I’m pretty sure there’s no way he’s flying the coop anytime soon, but we’re lucky. We have a Nonnie. And life at the Manor is way different from life on the compound. Nobody is up in my business all of the time.”
“Lucky you,” I grumble, but he shakes his head.
“Nah, there’s something about being around pack that’s comforting. The difference is my family is big enough and crazy enough that I get that atmosphere without needing a compound.” It’s easier for him and always has been. He might be a Lycan hybrid, but he’s always been way more of a stereotypical Lycan than I ever will be. He actually likes people. I’d rather run on an empty beach or hide in a library where no one can find me than be in the thick of it like Maddox likes to be.
“I better head to bed if you guys are all coming tomorrow. How early are you getting here?” I scrub my hand down my face, exhaustion seeping into my bones. I hope like hell that I find sleep quickly tonight.
“I think ‘cause it’s all of us, we’re portaling over, so probably at like lunchtime.” He lies back on his bed just as I climb through my window into my room. “You really shouldn’t go up there alone, you know.”
“Yes, Dad.” This isn’t the first time we’ve had this talk, so I tell him what I always do. “I’m a big girl, who can’t be broken all that easily. I’ll be fine.”
“Just because you can’t be broken easily doesn’t mean you can’t be broken.”
“Yes, grumpus,” I tease, and he rolls his eyes in response. “I hear you, now go to sleep.”
“Night, Luna,” His voice is almost wistful as the screen goes dark. I’m not sure what’s going on with him at the moment, but I’m sure he’ll talk to me about it when he’s ready. I jump in the shower, deciding to wash my hair before the craziness officially begins. I emerge from the shower, clean but pre-exhausted for future Luna, and drag on my fuzzy pajamas. I climb into bed, thinking about the next few days, half wishing I could make myself disappear. They say if you can dream it, you can manifest it, right?
Maybe if I hope for something hard enough, it’ll have to be cancelled. Even if Maddox is coming here to take some of the attention, the fact that I could potentially find my mate—since most of the packs are coming on Saturday—means that most eyes are going to be on me. Just thinking about that much attention makes me want to be sick.
I kick the sheets off and down around my feet before tossing around in the bed.
If I manage to sleep tonight, it’ll be a goddamn miracle.
