Twist Me by Mia Monroe

Grey

On Monday I enter Dulce Santo with Casper and Luca, ready for one of the iced coffees they started offering a few months ago. I need some more caffeine to get through the day. I didn’t sleep well this whole weekend, and I know why.

Tate offers a smile and it clicks in my mind that he’s the reason I met Mitsu. His boyfriend, Nix, and Mitsu are friends. Maybe Tate knows more about this Shibari stuff.

“Hey, Tate.”

“Hi. How’s it going?”

“Um, good.” I glance at my coworkers, who are chatting up the other guys. “Can I ask a weird question?”

“Ask away.”

“Is Nix into the Shibari stuff like Mitsu is?”

Tate’s face flashes surprise for just a second. “Uh, yeah. Definitely.”

“Oh. Do you...I mean, are you...um…”

“Yeah, I play with Nix and the ropes. Is that what you’re asking?”

“Yeah. Sorry, is that personal?”

“No. I don’t tell a lot of people, mostly because I don’t think they’d get it without seeing it. That’s how I was.”

I nod, not sure what to ask next.

“Are you into it?” Tate asks.

“I went to a workshop. My friend Mac said it was incredible, but um, I have a lot of control issues. Scares me.”

Tate’s face lights up. “Me too.” He leans in close. “I had a lot of trust issues too. Specifically with Nix. Back-in-the-day drama.” He laughs softly. “Anyway, I get it.” He puts his hand on me, and I tense, trying not to flinch. He notices and pulls his hand away. “Sorry, man.”

“It’s not you. It’s a thing with me. Sorry.”

“Don’t be.” He smiles. “I shouldn’t just touch people anyway.”

“What w-w-was it like?”

“Nix described it as freedom, which seems weird, right? How can it be freeing to be restrained, but for me, it was like I could finally let go. I had to trust him to take care of me and not let me fall. It was amazing. It felt like flying.”

As he speaks, a feeling of longing tugs at my chest. “I want to feel like that.”

“I bet Mitsu could get you there. He taught Nix everything he knows. He’s the master. If you’re scared, just tell him. But it’s okay to be scared. Lots of things can be scary at first but really worth it in the long run. You just have to trust Mitsu, and I personally think if you can trust anyone with Shibari, it’s him.”

“I trust him. Sort of. I think I’m just afraid I’m not gonna like it and then…” He won’t like me.

Tate nods as if he can hear my thoughts. “Nix taught me the most important thing is communication. Tell Mitsu what you need and he’ll get you there. You might be surprised at how good it feels.”

“Yeah, Mac couldn’t stop talking about it. He loved it, but he’s so free. He’s gone skydiving.”

“Yeah, that’s a hard no for me.”

I laugh. “Me too.”

“You and I are similar in some ways, I think,” Tate continues. “I’ll tell you something, Grey, I’m addicted to it now. When I have a rough day, the first thing I want when I get home are those ropes. I feel safe in them. Protected. Nix becomes my guardian, my provider, and I need that. It’s metaphorical, but there’s power in that.”

“Wow.”

“Talk to Mitsu.”

“I will.”

“I fully support that decision.” He grins. “You can talk to me too. Anytime you want.”

“I appreciate that. Thank you for being so open.”

Tate nods. “It took me a long time to get to that point. I had my reasons, but I kept people at arm’s length. It’s way better once you let people back in. The right people.”

Maybe I do have things in common with Tate.

“How do you know who the right people are?”

“Trust your instincts. And if you can’t yet, maybe the ropes will help.”

I exhale, imagining it. “It’s really very beautiful.”

“Very. I’ve seen myself, and it’s like I become someone else. It’s cool.”

“Yo, Grey,” Luca calls out. “You coming?”

“Coming.” I smile. “Thanks again, Tate. You’ve given me a lot to think about.”

“My pleasure.”

Later that day I stare at my phone, trying to summon the courage to call Mitsu again, when I’m startled by it vibrating in my hand. His name lights up the screen, making me smile.

“Hi, Mitsu.”

“Hello, Grey. How are you today?”

“Good. Just finished up a customer. You?”

“Good. Would you like to have dinner with me?”

My body immediately heats from the suggestion. “Yes.”

“Wonderful. When do you get off?”

“Two more hours.”

“Great. There’s a taco shop close to where you are. I can meet you?”

“Yes, sounds good.”

“See you soon.”

“Yeah.”

I hang up, firing off a text to Mac to update him. I’m a mix of nerves and excitement that I’m only able to keep under control because of the quick tattoo I have to do. My client is chatty as she explains that the honeybee taking flight from a rose is for her mom, a gardener, who just successfully completed chemotherapy. I smile, nodding as I work, happy to have her voice drowning out my own thoughts.

When she’s gone, I twist in my chair, waiting for Mitsu.

“What’s good?” Luca asks, doing the same thing I’m doing.

“Waiting for Mitsu for dinner.”

“Cool. I have another client, then I’ll be able to go home for dinner.”

“How’s that going?”

“Great.” He smiles and his whole face lights up. “They’re awesome.”

“Have you always known you were polyamorous?”

He nods like he’s thinking back. “Mostly. I suspected it more than knew, you know what I mean? When I met Cairo and Genesis, though, that’s when it kicked in.”

“I’m super happy for you.”

“Thanks, man. What’s happening with you and Mitsu?”

I shrug. “Not sure yet. I think we’re just hanging out and getting to know each other.”

“But you’re into him?”

“Have you seen him? He’s amazing.”

Luca chuckles. “I hope it works out. Everybody deserves love.”

“I agree.”

“He’s in back,” I hear Elizabeth say, so I turn around.

Mitsu steps into the space, his eyes zeroing in on me before he acknowledges Luca’s presence with a head nod. My stomach flutters at the mere sight of him in his jeans and T-shirt with simple sneakers on. His hair is tucked into a low bun just like mine. I wonder if he would ever let me put ink on him. All that unmarked flesh would be amazing to get my hands on.

Not my hands. Okay. My hands.

“Hi, Grey.”

Gah, his voice. If velvet had a sound; if honey could be heard; if honeysuckle made noise…any of them could be Mitsu’s voice.

“Hi.”

“Ready to go?”

“Yes.” I say goodbye to Luca and the others, grab my phone, and walk out with him to his car parked out front. It’s simple and classic, like Mitsu. He opens the passenger side for me, smiling as I slide in. “Thank you.”

“No problem. It sticks sometimes.” Joining me on the other side, he buckles his seat belt and starts the car. “Good day at work?”

“Yeah, it was. What did you do today?”

“Cleaned. I had no classes today, so I cleaned and gardened and relaxed a bit.”

“That sounds nice.”

“Do you make time for relaxing?” he asks, pulling into traffic.

I shrug, even though he isn’t looking at me. “I guess. I watch TV to just chill a lot. I don’t have much going on to make me stressed though. Few bills I gotta pay. I like working. Every piece I do builds my skills as an artist. When people come back or send someone to me as a referral, man, that’s probably what drugs feel like.”

“I understand that. It’s what I feel like when I work with the ropes.”

“We’re both artists in different ways. Both working with the human body to beautify it. That’s pretty sweet.”

Mitsu glances at me and smiles. “It is pretty sweet.”

A few minutes later, we pull into the parking lot of this cute little shop that I come to pretty often for lunch with the guys. “I love this place.”

“Oh, good. So do I.”

We go inside, waiting for a minute while the hostess finds us a table. The restaurant is crowded, as always, so we’re tucked into this little corner two-seater table. It’s actually kind of nice. Since there are walls behind us, I feel like our conversation will be easier to have over the noise of the other guests. Instead of sitting across from me, though, Mitsu pulls the chair so it’s next to me.

He smiles as he sits. “Much better.”

I smile, feeling my cheeks warm from his closeness. He smells amazing, clean and fresh, like the ocean. I want to bury my face in the crook of his neck, rub my face in his hair, lick his skin just to see what it tastes like.

And now I sound like a fucking stalker.

“What should we have?” Mitsu asks, oblivious to the crazy thoughts running through my head.

“I always get the al pastor tacos. I’m pretty addicted.”

“Mm, interesting. I get those or the carne asada. Can we share?”

“Please.”

“Margaritas?”

“Sounds yummy. Do you like strawberry?”

“Yes, but have you had their pineapple?”

“No. That sounds amazing.”

“It is. Willing to try?”

“Absolutely.”

The server comes over, and Mitsu takes the lead with ordering our meals, including the tableside guacamole. It’s a casual place, but when the server reaches out and puts his hand on my shoulder while Mitsu speaks, my entire body seizes up from the unexpected contact. He seems to notice my reaction and removes his hand quickly, smiling as he walks off to fill our orders.

“Are you okay?” Mitsu asks after he leaves.

I nod, clearing my throat. “Yeah. I just wasn’t expecting that. I don’t like people touching me, especially strangers.”

“He shouldn’t have. Do you want me to say something?”

I shake my head. “No. I’m sure from the way I nearly jumped from my seat that he won’t do it again.”

“I agree.”

Our drinks are delivered, our server smiling apologetically, and we clink glasses before each taking a sip.

“Oh my god. This is nuts.”

Mitsu nods, grinning. “Told you.”

“I’ll never drink anything else.”

“Glad I could open your eyes to something new.”

I chuckle. “Which is basically all you’ve done since I met you.”

He sets his glass down, focusing his eyes on mine. “Is that good or bad?”

“Good. New experiences are important. Otherwise we could be missing out on something incredible.”

“Is that what made you come to my workshop?”

“Kind of.” I take another sip of margarita to decide what I’m willing to say. “I’m, um, intrigued by you, I guess. You’re...interesting.”

He leans slightly closer, turning in his chair to face me. “Funny, I could use those adjectives to describe you as well.”

“Really?”

“Yes.” He reaches out and moves a few strands of hair off my shoulder, his fingers brushing against me in the process. He pulls his hand away. “Apologies.”

“It’s okay.” Normally such an intimate gesture would make me recoil, but for reasons I can’t explain, whenever Mitsu touches me, I seem okay.

“I’m really happy you’re here with me tonight, Grey. I’ve wanted to spend time with you one-on-one since we met.”

“Why?”

He tilts his head, his eyebrows rising. “Why? Because as I said moments ago, I find you interesting. Intriguing.” His eyes roam across my face. “Attractive.”

I swallow hard. “Um, because I’m kind of clueless sometimes, can you just tell me if this is a date or are we, like, just hanging as friends?”

“I suppose it’s up to you, but my intention is a little of both? I want to be friends with you, but I’m curious if there could be a romantic connection too.”

My heart feels like it just smashed against my rib cage. “Really? With me?”

“Why not with you?”

I start to speak, but our server arrives to make the guacamole. We watch his technique, sipping margaritas while my mind races with what Mitsu said. He doesn’t seem the kind to go straight to sex, but could we have more in common than physical attraction? The server finishes and a few minutes later the taco platters are delivered. We dig into our food, eating in pleasant silence for a few minutes until Mitsu brings us back to where we were.

“Why not you, Grey?”

I wish I had come up with a solid answer, but all I can do is offer the truth. “I’m not really into hookups. Definitely not. So, um...if that’s...I mean, if you wanted…” I exhale, pulling my eyes away.

“If you’re asking if I’m simply looking to take you to my bed, I can assure you I’m not. I am also uninterested in casual sex. It’s never been my way.”

“Oh. Right. I shouldn’t assume you would think of me that way anyway.”

“Well, then you’d be wrong. I very much find you attractive, but I’m also willing and interested in taking things slow. If we ever get to that point, it will be after we’ve built a solid foundation.”

My eyes meet his as my belly fills with warmth. He’s the first guy I’ve been on a date with who didn’t start pressing for sex right away.

“That sounds good.”

Mitsu smiles, brushing his pinky finger against my hand resting on the table. “But make no mistake, Grey, while I want to be your friend, I’m hopeful we can be more than that. I hope we find common ground and shared interests, despite our obvious age difference.”

“I’m not like most guys my age.” Understatement.

“I’m not interested in age anyway. I’m interested in energy. Who you are at your core.”

I take a bite of taco, then smile. “You’re a cool guy, Mitsu. You make me feel good just being around you.”

“I don’t need much more than that.”

We finish eating, and I have another margarita before ending the evening. As Mitsu drives me back to Black Heart where my car is, I wonder if he’ll hug me. Or even kiss me. Do I want him to do that?

Is the sky blue?

I almost laugh aloud at the thought. Fuck yeah, I want him to kiss me. All the kissing.

“Here we are,” he says, pulling into the back parking lot.

“Thanks. Dinner was great.”

“I enjoyed it as well.”

I unbuckle my seatbelt before smiling once more. “We can do it again if you want.”

“I want.”

“Cool. Okay.” I glance out the window, stalling and hoping that somehow he picks up on what I’m too shy to ask for. “Um, bye.”

I start to open the door, but Mitsu grips my wrist.

Mitsu smiles. “Would it be too soon for a kiss?”

I hold back a squeal. “No. I’d like that.”

Mitsu leans across the seat, his hand sliding under my hair to the back of my neck. His touch feels like heat shooting straight down my spine. He presses his lips to mine, soft but firm. He lingers, peppering sweet kisses in rapid succession but never opening his mouth to me, rubbing his nose on mine before letting me go. It’s over far too soon, but it was also one of the nicest kisses I’ve ever had.

“Thank you,” he says. “That was lovely.”

I nod, forcing my breath from my lungs. “For me too. Night.”

“Goodnight, Grey.”

I step from his car, turning to wave as I get inside mine. Tonight was the best date I’ve ever had, and now I know one thing for sure.

I need more.