A Vow of Forever by Lylah James

CHAPTER SEVEN

Killian

A knock at the door pulled me away from my stack of papers. “Come in.”

I thought it was Julianna but to my surprise, Gideon strode in. “Oh, hey. This is an unexpected visit,” I drawled at my father-in-law. “Julianna will be glad to see you. She’s coming in a bit.”

He was silent for a moment and my brow furrowed. I eyed him closely and saw that he was tensed, as if he was getting ready for a battle. “Is everything okay? What’s wrong?”

“Nothing is okay,” he finally spoke. “How can you think it is?”

I scowled. “I can’t read your mind, Gideon. What are you talking about?”

He made a harsh sound in the back of his throat before withdrawing something from the inside pocket of his jacket. A small stack of… pictures?

I cocked my head to the side, confused as I waited for him to continue. He flipped the first photo and my heart seized. “This,” he hissed. “I’m talking about this.”

Gideon carelessly threw the stack on my desk. The pictures flopped onto my lap and my jaw tightened. I fought against the urge to flinch, because fuck, it hurt. Seeing my wife’s photos scattered across my desk and on my lap; her scars were the main focus. Photoshopped in such a way that they appeared worse than they actually were. It was a painful reminder of how cruel people could be.

Julianna was so goddamn beautiful. She was my wife and the mother of my kids. But that wasn't how she was portrayed in the media.

Her scars were made fun of.

Her character was vilified.

Every word she said was twisted against her.

Every action was scrutinized in such a way that painted her into a villain, instead of a victim.

The media loathed my wife.

And no matter how many times I tried to fix it; the hate has only gotten worst.

“Julianna says she’s okay with it. That she doesn’t care,” Gideon gritted out, slamming his fists onto the desk. “That it doesn’t matter what the people say as long as she has you by her side. But is it really fucking okay?”

I squeezed my eyes shut because I knew he was right. He was absolutely correct.

It wasn’t okay.

“Is it really fair for her to go through this because you are a public figure?” he accused sharply. “Because trust me, if Jules was a normal citizen as everyone else, no one would have given a shit about her past and she sure as hell wouldn’t have been made into a mockery.”

Gideon took a deep breath, shaking his head solemnly. “This is your life but it’s not hers. She doesn’t belong here, Killian.”

“She is my wife.” My fists clenched. His words were true, but I still felt defensive. “She belongs where I am.”

He smoothed a hand over his face tiredly. “I’m not trying to separate you two. And I’m not asking you to make a choice either. I know how important this campaign is to you. Your late father would be proud of how far you’ve come along… and the man you’ve become. But you need to think this through with a clear mind.” He paused and then sighed. “I’m just a worried father.”

“Gideon–”

My door slammed open without a knock. Gideon swiveled around in surprise and I sat up straight, frowning at my assistant. She was clearly panicked and shaking. “What’s wrong?”

She gasped dramatically and I worried if she was hyperventilating. Meera was otherwise mellow, so what could have her so shaken up?

“Um… J-Julianna,” she wheezed. I blinked before my stomach dropped. “She’s downstairs. There is an… e-emergency.”

I was already sprinting out of the room before she could finish her sentence, Gideon closed at my heels. I slammed the buttons to the elevator and it was the longest fucking ride of my life as my whole body shook. Gideon was silent and even if I wanted, I couldn’t speak.

My heart raced as I thought of all crazy, possible scenarios.

How badly she was hurt? What happened? Did she faint…? Maybe it wasn’t anything serious.

Goddamn it, I fucking prayed it wasn’t anything serious.

The elevator pinged and the doors opened. I ran out into the crowded lobby where everyone looked panicky and that was my first indication that something was wrong. People spared me sympathetic glances and fear slide through my veins, beating strongly in my chest.

Julianna had to be okay. She had to be because I couldn’t accept any other possible outcome.

The moment I stepped outside, onto the busy sidewalk – my whole world came to sudden halt. Time slowed; the ground swayed underneath my feet and there was an insistent ringing in my ears.

I forgot how to breathe.

A painful burning sensation slithered into my chest and it felt like my lungs were about to collapse.

My wife was on the ground, curled on her left side with her four bodyguards surrounding her. There were a few more strangers around her and I realized they were all trying to create a protective circle around Julianna. Hiding her from the press and the other curious people taking photos on their phones.

I broke through the protective barrier and sank to my knees next to her unconscious and limp body. Her head was on Jackson’s lap and he was rubbing her hand between his.

“What happened?” I asked, my voice coming out choked.

“They crowded around us. And Julianna slipped into the incoming traffic,” he explained shakily. “It happened so fast. I was able to pull her back into safety but I think she might have injured herself when she fell.”

My stomach churned with nausea as I stared at her pale face.

“Has someone called 9-1-1?” Gideon demanded.

There was a chorus of yes as I carefully gathered my wife in my arms. “Julianna,” I croaked. “Open your eyes for me, Princess. I need to see those pretty greys.”

I waited for any signs that she heard me; maybe even a little twitch but she was too still. HA pasty face and cold hands; she felt fragile in my arms.

I held her tighter to my chest, whispering in her ears. “I got you. You’re safe now.”

Please, wake up.

I didn’t care that I was in the middle of the sidewalk, holding my unconscious wife on my lap or that people were taking photos left and right. I just needed Julianna to be okay, for her to wake up because the uncertainty was killing me.

I heard the sirens and familiar voice around me, but nothing made sense to me. My wife was my sole focus but then paramedics surrounded us and one of them took Julianna away from me. I watched in a daze as they put her on a stretcher and then my gaze dropped to my empty arms.

Dread filled my chest as they loaded her up into the ambulance but before they could close the doors, I lunged forward. “I’m her husband,” I spoke hurriedly; frantic. “Please, I need to be with her.”

“Get in,” the older male paramedics demanded. The relief that encompassed me was instant but not enough, because Julianna was still unconscious and probably hurt. There was no physical injuries but what about the triplets?

“Is she okay?” I asked shakily.

The woman who was assessing Julianna’s condition spared me a quick glance. Her lips were thinned in a grim line. “We’re going to get her to the hospital and they’re going to do everything they can for your wife and unborn baby.”

“Babies,” I corrected, as if that would make any difference. “We’re having triplets.”

The paramedics shared a look but was stayed quiet.

I felt numb by the time we got to the hospital. We got surrounded by nurses and doctors as they wheeled Julianna away from me. I didn’t fight it because they were my only hope at fixing whatever was wrong with my wife.

Words hit my ears as panic coursed through my veins and fear slithered down my spine.

“Maybe a concussion.”

“Could also be internal injuries.”

“Paramedics said she’s pregnant with triplets.”

There was a curse and then more words that didn’t make sense to me.

She was taken into the ER and wheeled into a room that I wasn’t allowed in. I paced outside the door as Gideon and Samuel joined me. Nurses went in and out of the room and every time I tried to get inside, they blocked my path.

“Is she okay? Is my wife okay? She has to be okay, right?” I kept repeating to no one in particular. “She has to be okay. She has to be okay. She’ll be okay.”

Finally, after it felt like hours – a doctor walked out. I lunged forward, almost frantically. “What’s going on? Why is no one telling me anything? Is she going to be okay?”

“Mrs. Spencer has had two seizures back-to-back and there’s a placenta abruption. We have to prep for a C-Section immediately,” he announced tightly. “Your wife is in extreme distress and so are the babies.”

His word filled me with terror and I don’t know if it showed on my face because he gave me a sympathetic look. “Does that mean – is Julianna, is my wife – what are the risks? She’s only twenty-nine weeks along. Isn’t that too soon?”

The doctor nodded. “The triplets will be premature and will have to be put in newborn intensive care unit. Our goal is to safely deliver all three babies without any lasting damages.”

“And my wife? What about her?” I couldn’t even hide the fear and pain in my voice.

“I can assure you, both mother and babies are our priorities.”

Then he was gone and I was left with only his words to hang on to; to hope.

I paced the waiting room. Gideon and Samuel were both quiet but I appreciated the fact that I wasn’t alone here. I didn’t know how much time passed. Long seconds turned into agonizing minutes. Maybe it was an hour? Maybe more?

It felt like forever.

I didn’t know how much longer I could last because I was going absolutely insane. I ran a shaky hand over my face and then my gaze flickered to Gideon’s. “Can you call Selene for me? She’s watching Cameron.”

My father-in-law nodded. “I already did before I got to the hospital,” he responded gravely. “She’ll take care of Cameron. You focus on Jules and the triplets.”

I walked to the windows, numbly staring outside. Samuel offered me coffee but I shook my head. I tried to sit down but I was antsy for that, so I went back to pacing. Back and forth; fists clenching, silently praying and with my heart in my throat.

The sound of the door creaking open had me swivelling around and the doctor stepped out, his face neutral.

“My wife,” I choked. “Is she okay? What’s happening? The babies?”

“Your wife is still unconscious, but she should be awake soon. Mrs. Spencer had lost some blood, so she’ll be weak for a few days. While the delivery was harsh on her body, she’s out of any immediate danger and is recovering.”

Relief was instant and my legs grew weak. “Oh, thank God. Thank God,” I breathed. “Thank you. And what about the triplets?”

The doctor sighed. “Mr. Spencer, I want you to know we’ve tried out utmost best–”

My heart squeezed. “What are you trying to say?”

“I’m so sorry,” he whispered, his eyes turning glassy. “One of the girls didn’t survive the birth. She was the smallest of the triplets, weighting barely three pounds and we tried everything to bring her back but… I’m so sorry.”

I stumbled back, shaking with the force of my barely contained emotions. The pain was sharp and brutal. “You’re saying that one of my daughters… my daughter, she didn’t….”

The doctor shook his head dejectedly. My knees weakened and I stumbled down into the chair behind me. I blinked and then the shaking started; my heart racing and the blood coursing through my veins growing cold.

My chest shuddered as raw sounds of anguish tore through me and my heart bled.

I could hear Gideon speaking to the doctor but I wasn’t listening. Shock coursed through me and I was trying to make sense of it all.

One of the girls didn’t survive the birth.

This couldn’t be… real.

But it was. As much as it made me sick in my stomach, it was real. I swallowed down the acidic bile in my mouth before I could gag on it.

Eventually, I stopped shaking. Samuel clasped my shoulders. “They have shifted Julianna to a private room. You should be with her.”

I followed Gideon upstairs, slightly unsteady on my feet. The minute I walked into Julianna’s room, my heart seized at the sight of her. Looking so small and fragile in the hospital bed. Tears clouded my vision as I walked closer. The expression on her beautiful face was peaceful and that broke my heart because for how long?

How do I tell my wife that we lost one of our babies?

I ran a knuckle down her warm cheek. “I got you, Princess.”

I took a seat on the chair beside her bed, taking one of her hands in mine as I waited for her to wake up. It felt like forever and I leaned my forehead against our laced fingers. I waited and waited some more.

The door behind me opened and Julianna’s father stepped into the room. He walked around the bed and stood on the opposite side of her head, hovering over his daughter, watching her intently with heartbreak written all over his face.

My eyes locked with Gideon. He stared at me; there was no judgement. He was just waiting.

And I knew exactly what I had to do.

My dead father would probably be disappointed in me.

But I had to make a choice.