Still Jaded by Tijan

CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

My eyes never closed for the rest of the night. Around four in the morning, I got up. I intended to get a drink from the kitchen, but when I got there a movement made me freeze in the doorway. I saw a figure of someone in the window. The person jiggled the window back and forth. When a small alarm sounded in the air, they stopped. The high-pitched whistle also stopped. Then they looked up and I gasped.

It was Marcus Donadeli with his hair waving in the wind. His eyes were cold and his jaw was clenched tight. He stared back at me. Then I screamed. He vanished, as if into the thin air, but I kept screaming until Corrigan turned the lights on. When that switch happened, something flipped in me. I ran to the front door and threw it open. Then I ran around the patio. No one. I ran the other way and I still didn't see anyone.

"Sheldon?" Corrigan came up behind me. He laid a hand on my bare shoulder.

I flinched, but didn't push him away when he slid down to my hand. That's when he took something from me, and I looked at it, dazed.

Corrigan brandished a butcher knife in his hands. His eyes narrowed, and he frowned. "Who'd you think was out here?"

My eyes widened. I had no memory of grabbing the knife. I didn't… I hadn't even thought that I stepped foot in the kitchen.

Corrigan chuckled. "You mean business when you mean business."

I choked out, "I saw Marcus at the window." When I heard myself, I looked up, almost desperate. I knew I sounded insane, but I wasn't.

Corrigan didn't look away. He'd sobered as soon as I said Marcus' name. "I'm sure you think you did."

"Do you think I'm crazy?" My heart was beating so fast.

"Well…"

"Corrigan!" I punched him.

He laughed and caught my hand. "Do I think you're crazy? No. Do I think you saw Marcus Donadeli? No. I think you saw someone trying to get in, and your mind jumped to the last real threat we've had. You didn't see Marcus. He's dead."

"When you say it like that, I feel stupid."

"Don't feel stupid. It's normal. I probably would've seen Marcus too." Corrigan squeezed my shoulder as he went inside. "I'm going to call the cops."

"Press one of the buttons."

It wasn’t long before welearned the buttons worked. My entire front yard was covered with flashing squad lights. Police were canvassing the lawn, looking for any signs of an actual intruder. Officer Sheila stood on the patio with her notepad in hand. She swept her calm gaze over us. "Okay. What happened?"

Corrigan lifted a hand. "Exactly how I just told you. Sheldon thought she saw Marcus. We didn't find anything. I pressed a button."

She frowned. "About those buttons—who did your security?"

Corrigan and I looked at each other. He answered, "Some company."

Her eyes narrowed further and they skirted between the two of us. "There's no identifying information. I've never seen this handiwork."

"I don't remember who I called. I have a business card somewhere…" Corrigan stood up.

Officer Sheila waved him back down. "Sit. We're fine. They know what they're doing. From the looks of it, that security saved the intruder from getting in. They got past the gate, but the windows and doors stopped them. Good job, Sheldon. You finally got a security system that works, but there's no footage on the cameras. The tech guy said you never hit the record button."

Corrigan snorted.

Oh god. I wanted to plant my forehead into the wall.

She frowned again and then gestured around the house. "The panic buttons are smart. Don't accidentally hit them if you're having a party or something, although any social gatherings are not a good idea for you. Where's the other musketeer?"

I froze in place. Corrigan stiffened.

"Bryce? Where's he at? He's usually a lot more informative than you two." She looked between us.

Then Corrigan said curtly, "He's busy."

Her eyes narrowed again and she studied us for a minute. Some decision flashed over her face, and then she turned away. "Okay. Well, we got nothing on who shoved you, Sheldon. I'm sure whoever it was, is the same person who tried to get in tonight. I can't be sure, of course, but you know how it is."

"Is that it? Someone's trying to hurt Sheldonagainand all you're going to say is that's 'how it is.'!" Corrigan shot to his feet.

She eyed him frostily. "Isn't that why you're here? What do you expect from us? The last time this happened, the three of you took matters into your own hands. Sheldon ended up in the hospital and then she took off for a month. Speaking of, where'd you go? You shouldn't leave in the middle of an investigation."

"Was I a suspect?"

She rolled her eyes. "Of course not, but it's not smart. That person could've followed you."

"She went to a friend's place." Corrigan folded his arms over his chest.

"Uh huh. That's all I'm going to get, isn't it? You know, Corrigan, I'm not the enemy. I'm not the one trying to hurt her. I'm trying to protect her."

"You suck at your job."

"Corrigan." I laid a hand on his arm, but it was tense. Too tense. I sucked in my breath and my eyes snapped to his. That's when I saw his anger simmering underneath his surface. Most people saw the joking Corrigan or the womanizing Corrigan. This was the loyal Corrigan and he was pissed. I stood and regarded Officer Sheila. "People get to us no matter what we do. I've had parties in the past, but that's over. No more. I'm not going to be stupid. I mightgoto a party, but I won't have one here."

"Sheldon."

"I'm not going to stop living because someone's pissed at me. If I lived like that, I wouldn't go anywhere ever! Do you know how many people hate me?" Add an entire sorority house now…

She groaned. "You make me go crazy sometimes. This is why we can't help you. You won't let us. You won't listen to us. Do you want a police escort? We can offer that."

Corrigan shook his head. "No. I'll take her to school and back. I'll be with her except when she's in classes. And I can get one of the fraternity brothers to watch her at all times. The guys like Sheldon. They're worried about her too."

She eyed him. "And if one of those guys wants her dead? Or hurt?"

His eyes shot to hers and his anger shown there. He bit out, "They won't."—or they'd have him to deal with. The threat hung in the air, though no one commented on it.

Officer Sheila pursed her lips and sighed. "Fine. I'll have a car posted outside the house at night. You got her during the days."

She turned to leave, but I stopped her. "You said it was a female before. You said a female was stalking me. Did you change your mind?"

"Someone tried to break into your house tonight. That's not a female move, not typically. That's what a male would do. So all bets are off unless you have two people trying to get at you?" She paused and then asked, "What happened with Bryce? Would it have been him?"

"What?" I was taken aback but laughed. "No. It wasn't Bryce. He's…"

"He's busy. He's didn't go off the deep end." Corrigan touched my shoulder and drew me back to him. One of his arms curved around my waist, as if shielding me.

Officer Sheila's eyes flickered at the movement, but she didn't say anything. "Anything else happens, call me. Or you can hit one of the panic buttons, but half the force will be here. That was linked to our emergency crisis number. Sheldon…just be safe."

I nodded, relieved it was done when she left. The rest of the police left with her, and soon my lawn was dark. The flashing red, blue, and white lights had gone. It felt empty now.

Corrigan cursed and went to the liquor cabinet. He pulled out a bottle of brandy and poured a drink.

"What's wrong with you?"

He shook his head and drank the shot in one gulp. "Nothing."

"Hey!" I grabbed the bottle from his hand and glared. "What's your problem? You're on me about my stuff. You talk too."

Corrigan's eyes were livid, but he didn't try to grab the bottle. "I don't make you talk about anything. I let you be you. I always have. I stand by and watch you self-destruct all the time, and then I come in and pick up the pieces. Me, Sheldon. Bryce helped out in high school, but it's been only me since Marcus. Now you think you saw him—now Officer Patterson says it was a guy that tried to come in here. I'm pissed off because someone keeps trying to hurt you. I can be angry, can't I? Give me the damn bottle. I want to get drunk."

My shoulders slumped down and I felt my anger evaporate. I slid the bottle across the counter to him and sat on a stool. "Are you mad at me?"

"No," he bit out.

I watched as he took another drink and then closed his eyes. His hands were clenched in fists. They rested against the counter. His shoulders were clenched as if he was fighting something inside of himself.

"Corrigan," I said softly.

He lifted strained eyed to me.

"I'm sorry I'm so screwed up."

A smile formed on his face and a chuckle escaped him. His shoulders relaxed slightly as he sighed. "You're not the problem. Don't ever apologize for that. I'm just—Bryce should be here too. I know things haven't been good with any of us for a long time, but I don't know. A part of me feels good that you and Bryce have broken up. I know it doesn't make sense, but I feel like everything's out in the clear. You guys aren't hiding what was going on and now we can all move forward. You two can fix whatever is the problem and get right with each other whenever, but he should be here. No matter if he's with that other girl—he should still be here. He's the other part of us…"

I swallowed tightly and looked down. Everything Corrigan said felt like a punch to my stomach. "I…" I didn't know what to say. I couldn't say anything. Bryce was gone… A part of me didn't feel like he was. A part of me didn't want to accept that, but I couldn't change it. It felt like cancer growing in the pit of my stomach. It was deadly and something I couldn't stop it.

Then Corrigan pushed a drink in front of me. "Drink it. Let's both get drunk. Screw classes tomorrow."

"Nothing good has happened the last few times we've drank together," I choked out. My throat felt so tight. I reached for the glass, but my hand trembled. When I let go of the glass, I looked up and met Corrigan's gaze. They were a clear green, but looked clouded now. I felt something in the air, something thick, but I didn't dare say anything. Something was weighing me down and I couldn't break its spell.

Then Corrigan asked, "When are you going to talk to him?"

I looked away. It was a question that I hadn't wanted to answer myself. It'd been nagging me, constantly in the back of my mind. I shrugged. "I don't know. I—I don't even know what I'm going to say."

"Because you don't want to hear the answers?"

I shook my head and Corrigan thumbed a tear away. My voice was raw. "I can't talk about this, Corrigan. I'm sorry. I—I can't talk about it."

"Okay." He nodded and then pulled me into his arms. A deep sigh wracked his body, and he tucked his chin into the crook of my shoulder. "We've gotten through worse."

Most times I'd push someone away, but I held onto Corrigan. I felt him kiss my forehead before he tightened his hold around me. No matter what had happened, it felt right to be on good terms with him again. All the strangeness between us before was gone right now. It didn't matter. What mattered was getting through the next few hours, next few days, and then I'd tackle the months after that.

"Fuck it. Let's get some breakfast. You hungry?" Corrigan pulled away. He took a breath to steady himself.

"Uh, yeah. Let me shower first. You're okay to drive?"

"Yeah. It'd take a bottle for me to feel something right now." He turned away as I got off the stool. My legs trembled too, but I willed myself not to fall down. Nothing was going to make me fall. Before I walked out of the kitchen, I looked back. Corrigan had turned his back to me, looking out one of the windows. His hands were braced on the counter and his shoulders were tense. I stopped and considered him for a second.

I'd known Corrigan all my life, before Bryce. There was a lot underneath the flashy image so many were dazzled by, but I didn't think anyone really knew what made Corrigan tick. Even I didn't. I wondered if Bryce did, but that was a mute point now. Bryce was gone. He was gone. He… I felt tears again and clamped them down.

"Go and shower, Sheldon." Corrigan had turned around.

I nodded and left. I pushed it all down and focused on the now. That meant showering, dressing, and grabbing some money for food. When I went downstairs, Corrigan had showered too. He was dressed in crisp jeans and a blue hoodie. His eyes looked tired, but I was surprised to see that he'd put some gel in his curls. That's when I asked, "When'd you cut your hair? What happened to those luscious locks of love?"

Corrigan grinned, holding open the door for me. "I cut 'em awhile ago. No more curls."

"Momma Corrigan must've been heartbroken."

He grinned and got into his car. "I know." Corrigan rested a hand on my seat as he turned and reversed the car. When we pulled out of the gate, he asked, "Where do you want to eat?"

"Sparky's."

"What?! No. I hate that place."

"Oh come on. We can find out if Dorothy is working. Maybe she'll try to kill me there and then we won't have to worry about who's my stalker. We'll know it's her."

"Your sense of humor sucks sometimes," he growled, but turned the car around.

I grinned. I knew I had a morbid sense of something, but the real reason I wanted to go there is because I wanted to see how she reacted to Corrigan. I'd been there with Bryce last time and the girl was nearly buckled from knocking knees. Corrigan was a different matter. Her cousin had almost stabbed him to death. Plus, he was a big deal on campus and I knew Dorothy had some history with the sorority chicks on campus. I wanted to gauge her reaction to him. Seeing him at a party was one thing, but having him at her family-owned restaurant was another matter. If I couldn't handle dealing with Bryce, then I could handle dealing with my stalker.