Heart and Soul by Carrie Elks

27

Who knew it was possible to suffer from heartache while sitting around a sparkling blue pool in Hollywood Hills, watching your daughter play with her father as she giggled with glee?

Meghan shifted on her pool recliner, pulling her shades down over her eyes to hide the sadness. Isla called at her and she waved, painting a smile on her face.

“Dylan’s absolutely in love with her,” Natalie, Dylan’s fiancée said as he lifted Isla up and threw her over his shoulder. Isla squealed and started to splash him, making Dylan shake his wet hair at her, beads of chlorinated water flying all around them. “Thank you so much for agreeing to come here. It’s made him a happy man.”

It wasn’t exactly a hardship staying in a multi-million dollar house nestled into the tree lined slopes. Dylan’s housekeeper had made the guest suite up for Meghan and Isla. She’d cooed over the four poster bed with billowing white sheets and breathtaking view of the city, yet she still felt like she’d lost something so important to her.

“It’s made Isla happy, too,” Meghan said, watching her daughter swim underwater. She’d spent so much time in the pool since they’d arrived that Meghan joked she was turning into a mermaid. Isla had loved that idea.

“Can I ask you something?” Natalie asked, her English accent cutting through the warm air. She’d been nothing but welcoming to Isla and Meghan since they’d arrived, and Meghan appreciated her kindness. She was one of those beautiful English roses you read about in books, with her blonde hair and cool blue eyes, and pink lips that always seemed to be curled into a smile. She was successful in her own right, too. A screenwriter who was in demand in Hollywood.

“Shoot.” Meghan turned on her side and propped her chin on her hand.

“Why didn’t you sue Dylan for child support? He’s loaded. His money could have made your lives much easier.”

Meghan ran her tongue over her lips. “I didn’t need it. We’ve always been comfortable. I don’t have this kind of money…” she gestured at the pool and the two-story flat roofed modern house behind it. The windows were like mirrors in the afternoon sun, reflecting the beautiful vista of the city around them. “But I had more than enough. My grandmother left me a trust, and I’ve always made my own money.” Her thoughts drifted to the ice cream parlor. She’d ended up closing it for a week, rather than panic over staffing issues. She’d be back by the weekend, when the rush would be in full force. Until then, she’d survive.

“You’re my kind of woman,” Natalie said, her lips curling. “Who needs guys when you have girl power?” She lay her head back on her sun bed, smiling as Dylan climbed out of the pool, water dripping from his muscled torso. “Actually, scrap that. I do.”

Meghan smiled. It almost reached her eyes, though nobody could have seen it behind her dark lenses. Dylan walked over and kissed his fiancée’s cheek. “What are you guys talking about?”

“Girl power.” Natalie grinned at him.

Dylan wrinkled his nose. “Natalie grew up in London in the nineties. She was one of those kids obsessed by the Spice Girls. I keep trying to wash it out of her with some good American rock music, but she’s stubborn.”

“I loved the Spice Girls,” Meghan said. It was weird being here with the two of them, knowing that once upon a time she’d slept with Dylan. It didn’t seem to bother Natalie though. Or Dylan, for that matter.

There was zero chemistry between her and Dylan anyway. He was a nice, slightly scatterbrained guy, who seemed genuinely regretful that he’d neglected his daughter for so long. Meghan was almost certain it wasn’t just an act to impress his fiancée either.

“I’m gonna grab a drink. Can you keep an eye on Isla?” He nodded at the pool.

Meghan smiled, because that was her line. She’d have to get used to sharing her daughter. “I got it.”

He went inside, and Isla started swimming again, grabbing a float and climbing onto it.

“Do you have a guy back home?” Natalie asked her, sitting up to sip her soda.

Meghan pulled her lip between her teeth. Rich had barely been out of her mind since their argument on Sunday. For the last few days she’d checked her phone constantly, expecting an apology, an explanation… something.

Instead, she’d gotten a phone call from a lawyer explaining that Rich was filing a civil harassment restraining order against Carlyn, and asking if she was willing to file one, too. He’d sent her some details which she’d completed, but there was no contact from Rich.

And it hurt. That was the truth. She’d somehow let herself fall for him. She’d believed him when he’d told her he wanted to be with her, no matter what. Let herself be taken in by the fairytale when it was never going to have a happily ever after.

“No. No guy.” She faked a smile at Natalie.

“Isla kept mentioning somebody last night. Rich?” Natalie’s glasses had slipped down her nose, and she was looking at Meghan over the rim. “Said she wanted to call him but you wouldn’t let her.”

“He’s our neighbor. She’s got a little crush on him.”

“Oh.” Natalie gave a half smile. “Best not tell Dylan about that.”

“Best not tell Dylan about what?” He walked out of the kitchen doors carrying a red can, and lifted it up to his mouth to take a huge gulp.

“That we both agree you’re not the best drummer in the world.” Natalie winked at Meghan. There was a look in her eye that told Meghan it wasn’t the end of their conversation.

Dylan blinked. “That’s bull…” His eyes widened. “I mean, baloney. Sorry.” He glanced over at Isla, who was oblivious to his cursing. “I gotta get used to little ears.” He frowned, and tipped his head to the side. “Who’s a better drummer than me?”

Natalie took her sunglasses off. There was a twinkle in her eye. Dylan sat on the end of her lounger, holding his soda but not drinking it. “Dave Grohl.”

“Nope. Doesn’t count. He’s a singer more than a drummer. Try again.” Dylan leaned closer to Natalie, his eyes narrowed.

They were staring at each other like they were the only two people in the world. Over their shoulders, Meghan could see Isla splashing happily as she used her arms to scull along the water, her body laid out on the float.

A wave of melancholy washed over her. As welcoming as they’d been, and as beautiful as their house was, she felt like an intruder. Next time Dylan was in town, he’d probably ask for Isla to come stay with him alone. And of course she’d let him, but the thought made her chest ache.

“Okay, Keith Moon,” Natalie said, her voice husky.

“He’s dead. Try again,” Dylan replied, leaning closer to Natalie. There was an intensity to their conversation that built a force field around them. This was what true love looked like.

And she ached for it.

Natalie’s grin was mischievous, her chin lifted. “Ringo Star.” She said it with a laugh. Dylan lunged forward and grabbed her by the waist, standing to sling her over his shoulder like a fireman, then he stomped over to the pool and threw her in. Natalie squealed, and disappeared beneath the surface, ripples circling out to the edge of the pool.

“Are you kidding me?” Dylan said when she resurfaced. “Ringo fu— I mean, freaking Starr? Don’t utter those words in this house again or you’ll pay.” He jumped into the pool after her, pulling his legs up to make a cannon ball. As he entered the pool, a tidal wave of water exploded around him, soaking Natalie even more than she already was.

Isla was laughing. She jumped off the float she’d been laying on and swam toward them. Dylan scooped her up and she laughed again, her red hair flying around her as he launched her into the air.

Meghan’s eyes stung. A single tear escaped from one corner, pooling at the rim of her glasses where it met her cheek. She wiped it away. She wasn’t ready to cry. Once she started, she wasn’t sure she’d be able to stop.

It’s been fun.That’s what Rich said when he’d broke it off with her. Was that all it had ever been for him? Because for her it had been so much more. It had been perfect. It had been everything.

It had been love.

And now that she’d lost it she had to figure out how to smile again.

* * *

“Hey. How are you doing?” Harper’s warm voice echoed through Meghan’s phone. Dylan, Natalie, and Isla had gone out for the day. They’d begged her to join them, but she’d refused. It was important for them to build bonds without her. After a few days here she trusted them. And they had the ever watchful Ger with them to make sure nothing happened.

She’d spent the morning by the pool, trying – and failing – to concentrate on a novel she’d found on Dylan’s bookshelves. He’d told her to help herself when they’d arrived. It was amazing how many of them were personally signed to him. She guessed he either had a lot of author friends or was a publicity manager’s dream.

“Hi. We’re doing okay. Still in LA. We come home tomorrow.” The thought of it made her throat feel tight. What would happen the next time she saw Rich in the hallway? Would he smile and be his usual friendly self, or would he ignore them?

What if he brought another woman home? Her stomach lurched as she tried to push that thought down. What a tangled web they’d woven. He’d warned her that he messed things up and she hadn’t listened.

She should have. Because now it was her mess too and it had edges so sharp they cut.

“So how are you really doing?” Harper probed. Meghan’s brave act wasn’t fooling her.

“Honestly?”

“Yep.”

Meghan pulled her bottom lip between her teeth. “I’m okay, for somebody whose baby daddy arrived out of no where and whisked us off to his L.A. mansion.”

Harper laughed. “I think I’d be okay with that too. Tell me everything about the place.”

Harper oohed and aahed as Meghan described Dylan’s house and grounds, letting out a soft sigh as she told her about the infinity pool over looking the valley. “Is Isla happy?”

“She’s ecstatic.” Even if she did keep asking if Rich could visit them. Each time she did was like a jab to the heart.

“I like having a daddy,” Isla had confessed the previous night, as Meghan had put her to bed. “Dylan’s nice. He’s like Rich, he makes me smile. Maybe I can have two daddies, and then I’ll have double the fun.”

Meghan blinked the memory away. She hoped for Isla’s sake that Rich would at least be kind to her when they encountered him in the hallway. Otherwise she really would show him what getting messed up meant.

“I bet. So what happens next with her and Dylan?”

“He’s leaving on tour for six months. I guess when he comes back we’ll arrange some kind of custody schedule. He’s really amenable to whatever we want. He says he’s just grateful I’m letting him be part of Isla’s life.”

“Well that sounds hopeful.” Harper paused for a moment. “And how about you and Rich? Do you think you’ll talk when you get back?”

“I’ve no idea,” Meghan confessed. “But I’m not looking forward to seeing him.” The impact of their split hadn’t fully hit her yet. But she knew it would, as soon as she was back at her own apartment.

Part of her ached to be there. To know he was next door even if he wasn’t hers. But the other part was so afraid because somehow she had to learn to treat him like a neighbor again.

It was confusing as hell.

“Well I hope he gets his head out of his ass,” Harper said. “I’ve told James what I think, and it isn’t pretty. I know he’s been through a lot, but he had everything in his hands. He just had to push through his fear. And he didn’t, and now everybody’s gotten hurt.” Harper sighed. “Seriously, I want to slap him.”

Meghan’s lips twitched. She really did like Harper. She was already proving to be a good friend. “It’s like he closed down on me, and I have no idea why.”

“Yeah. James was exactly the same way when I was pregnant and we hit a few road bumps. They should have classes for guys at school. How To Show Your Emotions 101. I’m so sick of this macho bullshit. They have this thing where they think they’re not allowed to show emotion. That it’s weak or something.”

“But how do you really feel?” Meghan asked, amused at Harper’s outburst.

Harper laughed. “Listen, I have to go. Alyssa just found the finger paint and is poised to do a Picasso on the flatscreen. Call me when you’re back, okay?”

“I will. Good luck.” Meghan ended the call and put her phone on the table, sighing as a warm breeze lifted her hair. This time tomorrow she’d be home, and it’d be time to face the music. And she had no idea how she felt about that at all.