Once a Wife by Patricia Keelyn

CHAPTER ELEVEN

Drew stopped in front of the small wooden house, glanced at the crumpled paper where he’d written Sarah’s address, and then looked back at the house. This was it. It wasn’t what he’d expected, though there really wasn’t anything wrong with it. It looked neat and well kept. It just seemed so small.

Hiking his backpack a little higher on his shoulders, he opened the gate and headed up the walk. On the porch, he hesitated. It had been a week since Miss Hanson had left the Crooked C, and he had no idea how she’d react to his showing up on her doorstep. He should have called first, he thought. But then, he’d been afraid she wouldn’t let him come. Now that he was here, he knew she’d help him.

Taking a deep breath, he opened the screen and knocked on the door. Seconds later, he heard footsteps approaching, and he backed away, letting the screen snap shut.

A girl a couple of years younger than him opened the door. “Can I help you?”

“Hi,” he said, suddenly nervous.

The girl scrunched up her features as if trying to figure out who he was. “Do I know you?”

“Uh, no. Does Sarah Hanson live here?” he asked.

“She’s my mom.”

“Oh, then you must be Lyssa.” At least he’d gotten the right house.

“Yeah.” The girl crossed her arms and frowned. “How’d you know my name?”

“Your mom told me.” When she didn’t respond, he hurried on. “I’m Drew Colby. She was my tutor this summer.”

The girl stepped closer and studied him through the screen. “You’re the boy from that big ranch up near Devils Tower?”

Drew nodded and slipped a hand under his backpack strap. “Yeah, that’s me. Is your mom here?”

“She won’t be back until later.”

“Oh.” Now what? It had taken him all night and half the day to get here. He’d never figured on Miss Hanson’s not being home when he arrived. He was tired and hungry, and he’d spent most of his money and eaten the last of the crackers he’d bought in Buffalo this morning. He should have called first.

“Why are you here?” Lyssa asked.

“I, uh, just came to see your mom.”

She seemed to consider that for a moment. “Well, as I said, she’s not here. Are you going to wait?”

What choice did he have? “Yeah, I guess.” He backed away and nodded toward the steps. “If it’s okay with you, I’ll just sit out here on the porch.”

Lyssa hesitated a moment and then stepped forward and opened the screen door. “You can wait inside. If you want.”

Drew thought about that for a moment. She really shouldn’t let him in, but it was pretty hot out and he needed to eat something. Maybe she had some crackers or something. “Okay,” he said, stepping into the house. “Thanks.”

Lyssa started toward the back of the house, but Drew waited, not sure whether she expected him to follow.

“Come on,” she said over her shoulder. “I was just fixing lunch. Are you hungry?”

Drew grinned. “Sure.”

“It’s just grilled cheese and leftover tomato soup from last night.”

“Sounds good.” They entered the kitchen, the warm cooking smells making his stomach growl.

“It’s almost ready.” She moved around the kitchen like she knew what she was doing, pulling out bread, butter, and cheese from the refrigerator and setting a frying pan on the stove. “I’ll just throw on another sandwich for you.”

“Great.” She seemed to have everything under control, and he had to give himself a shot before he ate. “Can I use your bathroom?”

She motioned in the direction they’d just come. “It’s down the hall.”

Drew started toward the bathroom.

“You can leave your pack out here,” she said. “I won’t look in it or anything.”

Drew flushed. He needed his backpack, but he didn’t want to explain his reasons to this kid. “Uh, that’s okay. I’ll take it with me.”

Lyssa shrugged.

The small bathroom barely gave Drew room to maneuver. It was hardly the optimum environment to give himself a shot. But he’d manage. He washed up a bit, and then retrieved his insulin kit from the backpack. Setting it on the toilet seat, he pulled out his vials and a needle. Except for the cramped space, he might as well have been on automatic. He’d been doing this without help since he was nine. First, he rid the needle of air, then loaded it with a small amount of insulin from both vials, the regular and the long-lasting stuff. He pulled his shirt up, lowered the waistband of his jeans, and it was over in a matter of seconds.

When he returned to the kitchen, Lyssa was already sitting at the table, soup and sandwich in front of her. She’d set another place for him.

“I didn’t know what you wanted to drink,” she said. “There’s tea, soda, and milk in the fridge. Help yourself.”

“Water’s fine.” He took the glass she’d set out for him to the sink and filled it.

For a few minutes, neither of them spoke as they dug into their lunch. He didn’t know kids her age could cook this well. The soup tasted homemade, richer and chunkier than any he’d had out of a can, and the sandwich was thick and gooey with cheese.

“This is good,” he said.

“When I stay with my great-grandmother, I do all the cooking.”

“My grandmother doesn’t cook, either.”

“Never?” She looked at him as if she’d never heard of such a thing.

Drew winced, a little embarrassed. He wished he hadn’t brought up the subject. “We’ve got a live-in cook.”

“Well, Grandmother cooks, when Mom or I aren’t around to do it for her. Of course, when Mom’s there, Grandmother wants restaurant food.”

“Restaurant food?”

She leaned toward him, as if revealing some big secret. “Kentucky Fried Chicken’s her favorite.” Shaking her head, Lyssa leaned back in her chair. “Mom says that Grandmother was born in the wrong generation. She’s the only eighty-year-old Shoshone junk-food addict around.”

Drew laughed. He had a hard time picturing Lyssa’s great-grandmother. Especially since he couldn’t have gotten his own grandmother within half a mile of a fast-food restaurant.

He went back to his lunch, but Lyssa wasn’t done chattering. “So what was my mom teaching you?”

He wondered if she always talked this much. “Math and English.”

“Are you going to get held back?”

“Nope. I passed my test.”

“Well, that’s good. I guess.” She didn’t seem impressed.

“What do you mean?”

She shrugged. “Well, you must be pretty dumb to need a tutor to begin with.”

“I’m not dumb. Besides, what do you know about it?” She had the most irritatingly superior look on her face. “What are you? In third grade?”

“Going into sixth. And I’m in the gifted program, so I’ve started sixth-grade math already.” She snapped her fingers in front of his face. “It’s a cinch.”

“Well, I thought it was boring.”

She rolled her eyes, and Drew wondered how someone as nice as Miss Hanson managed to get such an obnoxious daughter. Even if she did make a mean grilled-cheese sandwich.

“Want another sandwich?” It was as if she’d read his mind.

“Sure.”

“Figures.” Lyssa grabbed his plate and headed for the stove. “Boys always eat a lot.”

She was such a know-it-all.

“I guess you’ve had a lot of experience with boys.”

“As a matter of fact, I have.” She buttered a piece of bread and, topping it with several slices of cheese, dropped it into the frying pan.

“Funny, I don’t see any around here.”

She turned away from the stove and set her hands on her hips. “For your information, I spent most of the summer at Joseph Bright Eagle’s ranch. And he’s got six grandsons.”

Again, Drew rolled his eyes without saying anything. She was too much. A ten-year-old brat who thought she knew everything. Then she returned to the table with his sandwich, and he felt a little guilty. After all, she’d let him wait in the house and she’d made him lunch. She wasn’t all that bad.

“So,” he said, determined to be nice, “is that where you stayed while your mom was at the Crooked C? At this Bright Eagle’s place?”

“No. I was at Grandmother’s. She lives real close to Joseph. I went over there every day, and then Mom came home and made me move back into town with her.”

“You don’t sound too happy about it.”

Lyssa picked up her dishes and took them over to the sink. “I’m training for middle-school rodeo, and Joseph was helping me get ready.”

“Really.” Maybe she wasn’t so bad, after all, if she liked rodeo. “My dad was a bronc rider.”

“Yeah, well, my mom was one of the best barrel racers on the weekend rodeo circuit. She nearly made it to the finals one year.”

Drew smiled. He had her on this one. “I know,” he said, picking up his dishes and joining her at the sink. “Your mom told me all about it.”

That seemed to shut her up, and for the next few minutes, he had some peace while he helped her rinse the dishes and stick them in the dishwasher. She really wasn’t a bad kid, he thought. For a girl.

“So, how come you’re here to see my mom?” Lyssa asked when they were finished with the dishes.

“You sure ask a lot of questions.”

She shrugged. “Mom says that’s because I’m smart.”

Drew shook his head. Too bad she didn’t act like her mom.

“Well,” she prompted, “are you going to tell me?”

“Tell you what?”

“Why you’re here.”

“Oh, well, I guess you’ll know soon enough. I ran away.”

Her eyes flew wide. “From home?”

“Of course from home. I thought you were supposed to be smart.”

“Neat. So does your dad beat you or something?” she asked as if hoping to hear the gory details.

“No, he doesn’t beat me.”

“Oh.” She seemed thoroughly disappointed. “So why did you run away then?”

“He’s going to get married.”

She stared at him blankly. “That’s it?”

“What do you know about it?”

“Nothing. Only, I’d like it if my mom got married. It would be kind of neat to have a dad.” Then she obviously thought better of the broad statement. “That is, if he was nice and all.” Then her eyes lit up again. “That’s it. Your future stepmom hates you. Is she real ugly and mean?”

“Man, you watch too much TV.” He shook his head and started out of the kitchen.

Lyssa followed. “Well, if she’s not mean, I don’t get it.”

“I guess you’re just not as smart as you think you are.” He stopped in the living room and looked around. “Hey, have you got a Nintendo or Sega or something?”

“No. Nothing like that.”

He turned toward her, frowning. “You’ve got to be kidding. Everyone’s got one or the other.”

“Not us.” She looked embarrassed. “We can’t afford one.”

Drew instantly felt like a jerk. He didn’t mean to hurt her feelings. Even if she was annoying.

“Hey,” he said, “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean … Let’s just watch TV while we’re waiting for your mom.”

Every year it was the same thing.

Sarah had gone into school to start preparing for her September classes. And as usual, instead of the standard twenty-seven students per class, administration had given her thirty-five. Which wouldn’t have been too bad in itself, but she only had twenty-eight textbooks and twenty-five desks. Now she’d have to spend the next couple of weeks scrambling, trying to lay her hands on more books and desks.

Of course, at this point, she’d welcome anything that kept her mind off Reece Colby.

She’d been home a week, and her days and nights had been filled with thoughts of him. The oddest things brought back memories, fragments of their time together. Whenever it rained, she thought of their time in the loft, of the feel of his hands and the taste of his lips. When the sun shone, she remembered the day they’d roughhoused in the creek with Drew. She’d hear Reece’s laughter, rich and full, mixed with Drew’s boyish giggles. And when she sat with Lyssa eating a meal, she’d recall Reece at the dinner table at the Crooked C and wonder what he’d think of their daughter.

Then this morning, her period had started, and she’d burst into tears. It had to have been the craziest reaction possible. With all the other things facing her, the last thing she needed was another baby. She and Reece had too much to work out between them as it was, without complicating it further. Still, she realized, she’d been secretly hoping she was again carrying his child.

Madness. Sheer madness.

And she still hadn’t told him about Lyssa. She simply didn’t know how. She’d considered writing him a letter but knew that was the coward’s way out. A phone call was out of the question, as well. How could she tell him across three hundred miles of telephone cable that he had a daughter? Of course, in her moments of honesty, she admitted those were all just excuses. No matter how she told him, she knew he had the power to take Lyssa away. That was the real problem. Sarah needed her daughter and was afraid of losing her.

She hoped school starting would do the trick and let her have some peace. Maybe facing thirty-five rambunctious teenagers every day would exhaust her to the point where she could no longer think. No longer feel.

On the way home, Sarah stopped at the grocery store and picked up enough food to last for a few days. Juggling a full bag, her purse, and keys, she let herself in the front door of the house. Then came to a sudden stop.

On the couch, with Lyssa sprawled out next to him, sat Drew. It took Sarah’s breath away, seeing them like that. Both her children. Together. She wondered how anyone who ever saw them like this could not know they were sister and brother.

“Drew, what are you doing here?” she asked.

He jumped up from the couch. “Hi, Miss Hanson.”

She set down the groceries on the hall table and zeroed in on her son. “Does your father know you’re here?”

He shifted from one foot to the other, glanced at Lyssa, who was listening avidly, and shook his head. “No, ma’am.”

“Lyssa,” Sarah said to her daughter, “take these groceries into the kitchen.”

“But, Mom—”

“Then go get the rest from the car.”

“Mom—”

“Lyssa.” Sarah kept her voice firm and her eyes on the boy in front of her. He looked ready to fall apart. She knew how he felt.

Lyssa grabbed the bag and, giving her mother a “not fair” look, trudged off toward the kitchen.

“Okay, Drew.” Laying a hand on his shoulder, Sarah led him back into the living room. “Tell me what’s going on.” She sat on the couch and drew him down next to her.

“Promise you won’t tell my dad I’m here?”

Sarah sighed and took his hand. “I’m not making any promises. Now, tell me what’s going on.”

Drew examined their joined hands for several moments and then said, “I ran away.”

“Oh, my God, Drew.” Sarah bit her bottom lip. “How did you get here?”

“It wasn’t so hard.”

“It’s three hundred miles!”

“It was nothing. Being Saturday and all, I knew Tod would be going into town. So I hid in the back of his pickup. From there I hitched a ride with a trucker who was heading this way.”

“A trucker picked you up?” She couldn’t believe it.

“I gave him fifty bucks.”

Sarah groaned and shook her head. “Okay. So you got here.” She refused to think of all the things that could have happened to him on the way. “Why, Drew?”

“He’s going to marry her.”

His simple statement made her heart tighten. She had no doubt whom Drew referred to. And it hurt. Even though it shouldn’t have, even though she’d known it would come to this. “You mean Miss Hawthorne?”

“Yeah. Her.”

She couldn’t let Drew see how this news affected her. “Well, Drew, your father and Miss Hawthorne have been engaged for months. Don’t you think it’s about time they got married?”

“No!” He pulled away from her and sprang from the couch. “I don’t want him to marry her.” He shoved his hands in the pockets of his jeans. “I mean, I was hoping … I don’t know. I just don’t like her.”

“Does she treat you badly?” Sarah knew the answer. She’d seen Michelle with Drew. If anything, she went out of her way to be nice to him.

Drew gave Sarah his standard shrug. “I guess not.”

“Then what is it?”

“When she’s around, Dad’s always busy.” He met Sarah’s gaze, his eyes troubled and uncertain. “We never do anything together. Not like when you were there.” His eyes glistened with unshed tears, but he held them back. “Now it’s going to be just like it was before.”

“Drew, you don’t know that.” She reached out and took his hand, pulling him back down onto the couch, all the while fighting the urge to put her arms around him. “You and your father have become such good friends.”

“I heard them talking the other night. She wants him to run for another office.”

Sarah sighed. “If that’s what he wants, you have to respect that.”

“Tod will take over again, and I’ll never see Dad.”

“Oh, Drew.” She didn’t know what to say to him. He was wrong. She knew that. Reece had discovered his son, and nothing would ever get in the way of that again.

“Please, let me stay here.”

His request took her aback. Of course nothing would please her more. Still … “I don’t know, Drew.”

“Please.” There was so much hope in his eyes. “Dad will never think to look for me here.”

“Don’t be so sure.” Actually, she was surprised Reece wasn’t here already. Or at the very least, on the phone to her.

“I could help you around the house,” Drew insisted. “I can’t cook like Lyssa. But I’m good at fixing things.”

“Slow down.” Sarah again rested a hand on his shoulder. “First off, your dad needs to be told you’re here. He’s probably worried sick.”

“He doesn’t care.”

Sarah squeezed his shoulder. “You know that’s not true.”

“Then why’s he marrying her?”

Sarah sighed. How to explain adult relationships to a twelve-year-old? Especially when she didn’t quite understand them herself. “Drew, you need to understand that your dad is human. He loves Michelle and wants to marry her. He’s entitled to that. But it doesn’t change his feelings for you.”

Drew didn’t look convinced, and she realized it was going to take more than a talk from her to bring him around. She changed her tactics. “What about your grandmother? Is she back yet? Maybe if you could—”

Drew shook his head, cutting her off. “She’s not coming back. She called Dad a couple of nights ago. She’s staying in Boston.”

“For good?” It was the last thing Sarah expected.

“I don’t know. For the winter at least.”

Sarah hesitated a moment longer and then said, “Okay, I’ll make you a deal.” Even as she said it, she wondered if she was making a mistake. With Drew in her house, the truth would eventually come out about Lyssa. All Sarah’s options would be taken away—that was, if she’d truly had any to begin with. But she couldn’t turn her back on him. She’d done that once, eleven years ago. She couldn’t do it again. No matter what it cost her. “If you agree to let me call and tell your father you’re okay—”

“No.”

“Hear me out, Drew.” She used her stern-mother voice. “I’ll try to convince him to let you stay here with Lyssa and me until school starts.”

Drew looked at her, doubt in his eyes. “Do you think he’ll let me?”

“He might. We’ll continue with your schoolwork.” She felt as if she was signing her own death warrant. “Don’t frown. You may have passed the test to get promoted to seventh grade, but it’s going to take more work to catch up with your classmates. So, what do you say?”

“Do I have a choice?”

“No.” She smiled sympathetically at him. She understood his frustration. “Sometimes, we don’t have a choice. One way or the other, I’m going to call your father and tell him you’re here.”

He looked defeated, and she felt like a traitor. “Okay,” he mumbled.

“Promise me you’re not going to run away again.”

She saw his hesitation, but finally he nodded. “I promise.”

“Did you bring your insulin?”

“Yeah. I took it before lunch.”

“Good.” Smiling, she rose from the couch. “Now, how about if you and Lyssa take a walk into town while I call and talk to your father?”

Sarah didn’t want to talk to Reece.

If every little day things brought back memories of him, she didn’t want to think what the sound of his voice would do. But, as she’d told Drew, sometimes you had no choice. She had to tell Reece that Drew was safe.

She dialed and Millie picked up on the third ring. “Crooked C.”

“Millie, it’s Sarah.” She sat a little straighter, determined to go through with this. “I need to speak to Reece.”

There was a heartbeat of silence. Then Millie said, “Lord knows I’ve been waiting to hear from you all week. But this isn’t a good time, Sarah. Things aren’t so good around here right now.”

“I know. Drew’s here.”

“Sweet Mother Mary.” Millie’s relief was palpable even thru the phone. “Is he okay?”

“He’s fine. Please, let me talk to Reece.”

“Sure. Sure. Of course.” Millie set down the phone and a few minutes later, Reece picked it up.

“Sarah, Drew’s there?”

“He’s all right, Reece.”

“Thank God.” She could almost picture him running a hand through his thick blond hair. “We’ve been out all night searching.”

Sarah closed her eyes. It was good to hear his voice. And so difficult. “I knew you’d be worried.”

“Let me talk to him?”

“He’s not here right now.”

“Not there?”

“It’s okay. I sent him into town with … my daughter.” Please, Lord. Get me through this.

There was a pause on the other end of the line. “You didn’t have anything to do with this, did you, Sarah?”

The question should have made her angry. Instead, it saddened her, because she thought they’d gotten past this. “I think you know better.”

“You’re right.” She heard his sigh. “I’m sorry. It’s just that I’ve been worried sick. He ran off last night, and by the time I realized it, he was long gone.”

“I know. He told me.” She hesitated. “He also told me about your plans.” Then, though it nearly tore her heart out, she added, “Congratulations. I wish you both the very best.”

“Plans? What plans?”

She took a deep breath. He was going to make her say it. “Your wedding. That’s why Drew ran away. He’s afraid you won’t have time for him once you and Michelle are married.”

“Married? Where in the world … ?” He sounded genuinely perplexed. “Oh, I know. Look, Sarah, he misunderstood me.”

She opened her eyes. “You’re not—”

“No. Not now. Look, why don’t I fly down there? We can talk, and I’ll explain everything. Then I can bring him home.”

She reminded herself of the other reason for this call. Her promise to Drew. “Reece, give me a little time with him.”

“Sarah—”

“No, it’s not what you think.” She leaned forward and took a deep breath. She was fighting for her son. “He’s pretty upset right now. He needs some time.”

“I told you. It’s a misunderstanding.”

“Fine. Then tell him that on the phone. I’ll have him call when he and Lyssa get back.”

“Sarah, we just spent the entire night searching—”

“I know, Reece. But he’s just a boy. And he’s very confused.” She stood, taking the phone with her. “Let him stay here for a few days. Just until school starts. It’s only two weeks away.”

“I don’t know.” She could hear his resolve weakening.

“It’ll be good for him. Lyssa is …” Sarah shook her head and laughed lightly. “Well, she’ll be good for him. She’s one of the most obnoxiously normal children you’ll ever meet.”

“I’d like to.”

The statement threw her, and for a moment Sarah couldn’t breathe. Then she assured herself he was just being polite. “Let him stay, Reece.”

After a long pause, he said, “Okay, Sarah. But just for one week. Then I’ll be down to get him.”

Reece hung up and then sank into his desk chair.

“Is he okay?” Michelle asked.

He looked up at her and nodded. “Fine.”

“How did he get there?”

“I didn’t ask.”

“You didn’t—”

Reece held up a hand to cut her off. “He’s there. He’s fine. I’ll talk to him later.”

Michelle looked a little put out that he’d cut her off, and he didn’t blame her. Things had not been going well between them for the past week. He’d thought their relationship would get back to normal after Sarah left, but he’d been wrong. In fact, things had gotten worse.

Sitting here now, he realized why. Sarah. She may have left the Crooked C Ranch, but she hadn’t left alone. She’d taken his heart with her. All the questions he still couldn’t answer about their past hardly mattered. He loved her as surely as he had thirteen years ago.

He couldn’t let this farce with Michelle continue. “Drew ran away because he thought you and I had set a wedding date,” he said.

“Where did he get that idea?”

“From me.” She started to say something, but again, he held up a hand to stop her. “He misunderstood. I asked him the other night if he missed having a mother. And how he’d feel about having one now.” He paused. “Obviously, he didn’t like the idea.”

She sat very still for a moment and then said, “Maybe he’s smarter than we are.”

“Maybe.”

“It’s not going to work, is it, Reece?”

He sighed, wishing there was some way to keep from hurting her. He could think of none. “No. It’s not.”

“Maybe we’ve been fooling ourselves all along.”

“How so?”

“Thinking we could marry each other without being in love.”

“It seemed like a good idea at the time.”

“Yes.” She stood and smiled sadly. “It did. But it seems things can fall apart even when you don’t love someone.”

He stood and, circling his desk, pulled her into his arms. “Take care, Michelle. I hope you find—”

She pressed a finger to his lips. “Don’t. I can see how all this is tearing you apart. Don’t wish it on me.”

Smiling at her logic, he released her. “At least let me wish you happiness. And tell you that it’s you who should be running for state representative.”

Michelle paused while gathering her things. “Maybe I’ll do that. And since we’re handing out advice—” she nodded toward the phone “—Drew doesn’t want a new mother because he’s already found his real one. If you let that woman get away, you’re a bigger fool than I thought.”