Dungeon Master by Golden Angel

Chapter Twenty-Three

Gavin

Mondays at the Outlands on the restaurant level were pretty slow, which was welcome after the weekend, but today, Gavin wished it was a little busier to help keep his mind off things.

He kept replaying his and Leah’s argument in his head and wanting to kick himself. While he was the boss in the bedroom, and even occasionally sometimes out of it, he honestly hadn’t meant to order her around. He’d been reacting rather than acting. That didn’t mean it was okay, but he was hoping she understood enough to be forgiving.

Forgiving her for going to Esther was a little easier after they’d talked. She wanted to protect her friend and had probably been reacting to Gavin’s dictates. It hadn’t even occurred to him until later, she had actually followed his order not to confront Jax. She’d gone straight to Esther, who he’d said nothing about. He still wasn’t sure if she’d realized that.

If she hadn’t, he wasn’t going to bring it up.

The hours slowly ticked by until he was finally able to hurry off to Dr. Silverwood’s office. If his employees were surprised by how fast he dashed out the door, no one said anything to him.

By some chance of fate, Leah pulled into the parking lot right after him. He could see her in his rearview mirror and caught the moment she realized she was directly behind him. It was hard to tell how she felt about it.

Getting out of the car, he walked to the sidewalk, waiting for her to join him. He supposed he could have gone in on his own while she sat in the car fiddling with her purse as if to give him time to do so, but that didn’t sit right with him. So, he waited. After a few minutes, she got out of the car, her lips pursed as if she was annoyed with him for waiting.

For some reason, that made him grin. The corner of her mouth tipped up before she pushed it down again.

He knew she hadn’t really expected him to go inside without her, and she knew that, too. The fiddling with her purse had been to give her time, but she wasn’t actually annoyed with him for waiting.

Dressed in a blue pantsuit, her thick blonde hair pulled into a braid that trailed over her shoulder, she looked like business-Elsa from that kids’ movie. Gavin kinda liked it. Then again, he’d always liked her dressed up in her suits. She looked so prim and proper, it made him want to peel them off to find the wild woman underneath.

By contrast, he was wearing his usual jeans and an Outlands bar shirt. Today, more than ever, it emphasized both the differences between them and how things hadn’t really changed over the years on the surface. Ten years ago, if they’d gone to counseling, they would have shown up wearing very similar outfits to what they wore now.

The difference was, Gavin was older, less prideful, and far more determined to make things work out this time—because he knew exactly what he had to lose.

“Hello, love.” He held out his hand, offering it to her, wondering if she would take it.

She only hesitated a moment before her fingers settled into his, though she didn’t come in for a kiss. At least, she was holding his hand. That was a small step forward.

“Hi,” Leah said almost shyly, averting her eyes and not meeting his gaze. He gave her fingers a squeeze and saw her relax as he led her inside.

* * *

Leah

Sitting next to Gavin on the couch, Leah was very aware of his proximity, part of the reason she’d kept a little space between them before. It was so easy to feel overshadowed by his presence. On the other hand, she also found the strength emanating from him to be comforting, and she needed that today.

Besides, she didn’t think he was going to relinquish her hand once she’d give him hold of it. Deep down, she didn’t want him to.

With as many years as she’d spent hung up on this man, she wanted them to work, but she was also afraid of wasting more time if they ultimately didn’t. It felt as if nothing had changed, that they were going around the same issues over and over again, which was what she’d been afraid of.

“It sounds as if you two inadvertently hit on a hot topic. Because of your past relationship, there are going to be things that seem small but that can blow up into something much bigger. It’s actually triggering past emotions, and those can get all tangled up in your present emotions.” Dr. Silverwood sounded almost as if she was giving a school lecture on the topic, but it still struck home with Leah. Glancing at Gavin, who was doing the same back to her, she realized it did for him as well.

They’d both poked at old wounds and reverted to old behaviors. Not exactly encouraging.

Apparently, Dr. Silverwood disagreed.

“What’s good is you both recognized what had happened, even though it was after the fact, and you were able to talk through it together.” Dr. Silverwood beamed at them approvingly.

Oh… Leah hadn’t thought about it like that.

In the past, she and Gavin had never had a phone conversation like they had yesterday morning. They’d argued, yelled, then gone back through it again until she’d shut down because she couldn’t take it anymore. Then had come the silent treatment.

Yesterday’s conversation on the phone had felt incredibly circular because while they were talking about how they’d reverted back to old habits, the conversation itself was something entirely new. They’d talked through it, both of them acknowledging the other’s points and being able to see the other’s perspective. She’d understood where Gavin was coming from and felt like he’d understood her.

They might not have entirely agreed with what the other person wanted to do, but that wasn’t insurmountable. If they hadn’t blown up at each other the evening before—if she had waited to talk to him rather than reacting—they might have even worked through it together. The tightness in her chest loosened, and she even felt a little warmer inside.

Gavin squeezed her fingers again, and she squeezed his back without thinking. This felt… better. Like they were working together as a team. Which was something she hadn’t felt in far longer than they’d been divorced. Her heart felt lighter after hearing Dr. Silverwood point out what they’d done right and knowing she didn’t think they were a lost cause.

“Where do we go from here?” Gavin asked, echoing the question Leah had asked him last night. He hadn’t loosened his grip on her hand, as if he was afraid she was going to sneak away if he let go.

She leaned a little closer, and their upper arms touched. Saw him glance at her out of the corner of her eye but didn’t look back at him, still watching Dr. Silverwood, waiting for her response.

“Forward. If you want to. I think you two have a good start, but there will be times when old habits happen. What’s important is you recognize and work past them. I’m sure it felt like a regression, but from everything you’ve told me, I see this as progress. We’ll keep working on the communication. I think it’s great how fully committed you two are to making this work.”

Fully committed… right.

Except Leah hadn’t been, had she?

* * *

Gavin

They left Dr. Silverwood’s office the way they’d come in, hand-in-hand. Gavin felt much lighter and more hopeful than he had the past twenty-four hours. He really hadn’t known what to expect from talking to Dr. Silverwood today, but her assessment had far exceeded his wildest hopes.

In some ways, suggesting they come to talk to her had been his last-ditch effort to make things work, the same way it had been for Leah all those years ago. Yes, he wished he’d done it then, but he was glad they were doing it now and doubly glad Leah hadn’t turned him down when he’d made the suggestion.

Something was bugging Leah. He could tell. The closer they got to their cars, the more jittery she seemed. Maybe worried about how to say goodbye? They’d agreed they wanted to keep working on things with Dr. Silverwood, which meant they were going to keep seeing each other, but things still felt awkward.

Well, he’d be able to soothe her on that front. Gavin planned to get a kiss before she left to make up for the way their time together on Saturday ended.

Walking her to her car door, Gavin pulled her around to face him, wrapping his arms around her waist. Leah immediately tipped her head back, eyes already closing as he leaned in for the kiss. She sighed against his lips, melting into him with little resistance, and some of Gavin’s nerves relaxed. He kept the kiss gentle, seductive rather than demanding, and Leah responded in kind. When they finally broke apart, he smiled down at her, but she still looked nervous.

“Um, would you like to get together tonight?” she blurted before he could say anything, and Gavin’s smile widened. If that was what she was nervous about, he was happy to assuage her worry. Especially since it was a Monday night, and the Outlands didn’t need him on the floor. He’d hand everything over to Trey, the night manager.

“Sure.” His fingers stroked over her back. “I’ll take you out?”

If anything, her nerves seemed to increase, and she took a deep breath. Gavin tilted his head as he looked down at her, studying her and trying to figure out what was causing her consternation.

“I meant… would you like to come over to my place… tonight? For dinner and um, a sleepover.”

“I would love to.” He frowned. She seemed more amped up than a simple invitation would explain. He was amused by her calling it a sleepover. “Are you sure? I don’t want to come over if you’re not comfortable having me there.” She’d once told him the reason she’d moved out of their house had been because she hadn’t been able to get away from the memories.

“I am. Sorta. It’s kind of a big step.” She smiled up at him a little shakily, but there was determination in her blue eyes. “I was going to invite you to come shower with me on Saturday before we got off track. What Dr. Silverwood said about commitment and what you said about me waiting for something to go wrong, both of those things are true. I haven’t been fully committed because I’ve been waiting for something to go wrong, but we can’t go forward if I’m holding back. And I want to go forward.”

“Lass, ye have no idea how relieved I am to hear ye say that.” Gavin chuckled, curving his fingers around her jaw and brushing another kiss over her lips. Leah relaxed further and giggled. “I would love to come over this evening… and have a sleepover. Shall I bring the nail polish? Can we have a pillow fight? Oof.” He grunted when she elbowed him in the gut.

“Your sense of humor gets weird at the oddest times,” she said, shaking her head, but her eyes sparkled with mirth. This felt like the good times, with flirtatious banter back and forth.

“You bring it out in me.” He dropped another kiss to her lips before letting her go. “I’ll see you tonight, love.”

“See you tonight.” She looked reluctant to let him go, which Gavin took as a good sign.

Opening the car door for her, he waited until she got inside, and a thought occurred to him, and he paused.

“Leah? Should I bring my toy bag?”

Pink filled her cheeks in a hot blush, which he loved to see, and she nodded.

“Yes, please.”