Push by Sadie Rose
It had been a week since Roman and I had officially started dating and it had been the most blissful seven days of my life. I would work all day and then ride the elevator up to the penthouse. Apparently few people knew it existed and when I told Raymond he was positively glowing with envy. While I trusted Raymond and he was now one of my best friends, I didn’t tell him everything about what was going on with Roman and me. I knew how private he was and I didn’t want to betray his trust.
Raymond was persistent and his constant badgering for information all week culminated in me being pissed off by Thursday afternoon. Additionally, I had only twenty-four hours left to get a payment into the accounting office for my mother’s treatment, and after a week I was no closer to coming up with the money than when I had started. I called all my credit cards asking for a credit limit increase to only be denied. I had reached out to several banks but they showed little interest in loaning to me. My first paycheck hit my account but with rent coming out and now my student loans, I didn’t have enough to cover much else.
I was down to one option and that was to talk to Madison after work. I had barely seen her since my first date with Roman last Friday. Our schedules weren’t syncing up and with all my time spent away, we had only communicated via text. I didn’t want to ask her for the loan but I knew she had the money and I knew for a fact that I would pay her back. She was my last option so I was praying tonight went well. Thankfully Roman had a work dinner and couldn’t get out of it so I wouldn’t need to come up with any kind of excuses to go home. He had apologized, saying he hated to miss out on an evening together but we already had plans for me to see his real house outside the city tomorrow.
All of this was running through my mind right before lunch when I got a call from Madison on my desk phone. Since she never called my desk and always used my cell I answered it immediately.
“Hey Madison! What’s up? Why not call my cell?”
“Ollie! Thank fuck! I tried calling your cell!” She shrieked into the receiver.
I had known Madison long enough to know from her voice something was seriously wrong, “Mads what’s going on? Are you ok?”
I could hear tons of noises behind her and she sounded out of breath, “No! My dad had a heart attack, Ollie. My mom called me about thirty minutes ago and told me. He was in court doing closing arguments and midway through they say he clutched his arm and fell to the ground.”
“Oh my God! What do you need me to do? How can I help?” Raymond slid his chair over to my desk and pulled the receiver out to where we could both hear her.
“Nothing right now. I’m running through the airport now because I’m on the next flight to Los Angeles. I’ll update you more when I know something but I didn’t want you to freak out if you hadn’t heard from me when you got home tonight. I don’t know how crazy it will be when I land.”
“Don’t worry about me at all Mads, focus on your dad and I’ll check in with you later.”
“Ok. Love you best friend.”
“Love you too Mads.”
When I hung up the receiver, Raymond and I just looked at each other.
“So I only heard the tail end of that conversation. Why is she on the run around the airport?”
When I played back our conversation for him, Raymond’s only response was a deep sigh. We sat there a few minutes stunned at the turn of events. Once the shock wore off, my brain started working again and I realized I wouldn’t be able to ask Madison for the loan. Before I even realized it, Raymond was holding my hand and blotting my cheeks with a tissue. I was crying.
“Are you close to her dad too?”
Of course Raymond would assume that’s why I was crying. He didn’t know I was a horrible friend and was crying because I realized with her dad’s heart attack my options of helping my mother were now slim to none. I wouldn’t and couldn’t talk to Madison right now about money. I wasn’t that low of a friend to say in one sentence, hey how’s your dad can I borrow five grand? In the end I decided to confess my problems with Raymond. “No, I’m not really close to her parents. I’ve met them several times but we don’t interact unless we are all with Mads.”
“What’s going on then, honey boo? Why are you crying?”
I hesitated for a second, some friends got real uptight with money talk, “I was going to ask Madison for a loan tonight when I saw her. My mom isn’t doing well and she has to get treatments and can’t afford to pay for them on her own.”
“Oh hunny, that’s rough. If I had any money I’d loan it to you but I just bought my condo and I’m spent. Like I can’t even furnish the place yet besides my bedroom.”
He wrapped me up in a big hug and I could feel the hot tears rolling down my face. Raymond really was a good friend.
We sat at our usual table in the cafeteria and ate in silence. I was pondering all the ways I could try to get money overnight and coming up with crazy ideas that ranged from stripping to hitting the casinos. I thought of the small amount of jewelry I owned and could pawn. Raymond’s hand smacked the table bringing me out of my thoughts.
“I’ve got it, honey!”
I raised my eyebrow at him for him to continue, “What?”
“What about the trip that Roman bought you?”
“What about it?”
“I think you could sell it. Even if it’s not for how much he paid for it, it could be enough to pay the bills.”
No. That was my instant thought at selling the vacation that Roman bought in the silent auction. That was a gift and he did it because he wanted to show me how attentive he was to me. Plus I had plans for us to use the trip together. I mean I hadn’t said it and neither had he but it was pretty much a given that he would be the one to accompany me on the trip whenever I decided to use it. It would kill me to not take that trip with him.
Raymond reached across the table, placed his hand over mine and gave me a serious look. “Ollie. I think you need to look at it as a serious option.”
I shook my head from side to side. “I just don’t think I can do that Ray. I mean it was a gift and was expensive and meant specially for me to share with Roman. I mean—what would Roman think if I did that? “
Raymond’s eyes turned soft as he looked at me, “Honey, I think if you explained it to him, he would pay for the treatment outright. That man is clearly smitten with you from the small snippets you have shared with me.”
“No, I can’t do that. I won’t take money from him. Under any circumstances.” I adamantly told him.
“Then let me make some calls at least. I know some people who would probably be interested in that vacation and taking it off your hands. Let’s at least see how much they would be willing to offer you for it.”
“Ok,” I gave him a weak smile and squeezed his hand as a silent thank you.
In my peripheral, I saw a flash of movement. When I turned, I could have sworn I saw the backside of Roman walking out of the cafeteria. I shook off the thought. He wouldn’t have come in here and not come over and said hello. Every time he had seen me he always came over and greeted me and found some way to touch me.
After lunch, I could hear Raymond at his desk making call after call to his friends and telling them about the amazing vacation they could take for a bargain price. Each phone call depressed me more but at the same time I caught myself holding my breath waiting for the one person who would bite and buy it.
On the fourth phone call, Raymond got a bite. His friend Kenneth was getting ready to propose to his girlfriend and fell in love with the idea of popping the question in such an exotic locale. The thought of someone getting engaged on the trip that was meant for me was excruciating. It shouldn’t have bothered me but it did. I bit my tongue on the tropical proposal because I was out of options. I was going to have to sell the trip that was meant to be mine.
I walked into my apartment and it felt foreign to me. I had barely been there for a week. I was starting to feel more at home in Roman’s apartment than my own. I didn’t know if Miller reported back to Roman about my comings and goings or what I did with my time outside of work but since most of my time had been with him I didn’t care. Tonight was going to be a different story. Kenneth was coming over to pay me for the vacation and get all of the information. Raymond had asked if I wanted him to come over too but since he had assured me that Kenneth wasn’t a serial killer then I figured it was fine since I had my own security detail outside my home.
An hour later, my new acquaintance Kenneth was hitting my buzzer asking to come up. I buzzed him in the door and met him at my front door. I had never sold anything online or bartered for goods so this was something completely foreign to me. I felt awkward and unsure. I was second-guessing and kicking myself for not having Raymond here.
I let Kenneth in and thankfully he got right down to business. He was willing to pay fifteen thousand dollars for the trip and he brought a cashier’s check. This would cover the first two payments of my mom’s treatment and I knew I couldn’t say no. We exchanged his check for all the information on the trip and I wished him good luck with his proposal. It was all over in ten minutes, and after I shut the door I leaned against it, sinking to the floor. I felt such a lift come off of me knowing that I was going to be able to make the payments and help get my mom.
My relief was tinged in sadness, clouded by the knowledge that the first time a man had shown me a real kindness I had sold it away at the first opportunity. I was going to have to come clean to Roman and tell him what happened to the vacation. He would understand after I explained; he would understand the magnitude of my problems and the drive to help my mother.
I slowly got myself up off the ground and started to get ready for bed. As I lay down in bed I hear the familiar ping of my phone alerting me to a new message. I open my phone to see a text from Roman.
Roman: Still at dinner. Are you home alone?
I type out my reply.
Yes. Madison had to fly to L.A.
Instantly I see the three dots meaning that he’s typing.
Roman: That’s not what I’m asking Ollie.
The hairs on my neck start to stand on end. Miller. He’s told him about Kenneth coming over. I mean did he take photos and send them to Roman? Did he let him know I had a male guest? Did he call him? What the fuck! Why would he do that? I type my reply and try to temper my anger and annoyance.
I.am.alone. You are not here and you are the only person I would want here tonight. Enjoy dinner. You say you don’t like to be questioned on loyalty. Neither do I. Goodnight.
I put my phone on vibrate and throw my phone down on the nightstand. I pull my covers to my chin and roll to my side. I can hear my phone vibrate and I ignore it. After a mentally exhausting day, I just want to go to sleep and relax. I take a few deep breaths and start to feel my muscles loosen. Thankfully it doesn’t take long and I fall into the blackness of deep sleep.