Push by Sadie Rose

 

Roman

Two weeks later.

I sit at my desk and stare at the letter laying open. I have written it twelve times and I still don’t know if it’s good enough to give it to her. Hell, I don’t even know how to give it to her since she won’t answer my calls, read or respond to any texts and when I got completely desperate and tried to email her on the work server she filed a formal complaint in my Human Resources department. I’m desperate for any communication with her and this letter needs to convey so many emotions and truly let her know that I know I fucked up. I read it over again to check for anything else I could add.

Dear Olivia,

Dear Ollie,

My baby girl,

You are all that I think about. I can’t function without you. You consume me. I wake up in the mornings from fitful nights of sleep where I dream of you, of us, and the life we could have together. The life that I so desperately want us to still have. I think about all of the times you showed me how much you cared for me. The spark in your eye when you’d call me out on my shit. Or your playfulness, the shy smiles you’d give me. I fell in love with you the moment I took your hand and walked out of that coffee shop. I never knew that day if I’d see you again. You were a freight train that barreled into my life and woke me up. I have been successful in business. I’ve sold and built more than anyone my age. I’ve made my parents proud, my friends happy, and most of all I was making you happy. You. You matter to me more than anyone and I’m going to keep trying to prove that to you.

When I said those hateful things to you that night it came from a place of self-loathing. I had never met anyone who was with me for me. Always for the money. I knew the entire time we were together that it wouldn’t have mattered if I had nothing. Ollie, I am begging you to please, open your heart to me one more time and let me in. Let me love you, let me back into your life. I’ll always respect your wishes and if you can’t forgive me I’ll respect that. I’ll be devastated but I’ll honor your choice.

Baby girl, please, I have never begged in my life and for you, I would grovel in front of every person I have ever met to get the chance to have you look at me and smile. I will give up everything I have, what I’ve built if it means you’ll give me another chance. Please, please. I’ll meet you anywhere, anytime, I will drop everything to see you. These last two weeks have been the worst in my life and I fear this is only the beginning of this pain if I never get that second chance.

I love you, Olivia. I heard you that night and it splits my soul open that I took that moment from you and us.

Please Ollie baby.

I love you.

Roman

I take a deep breath and pick up the letter. I fold it and place it in an envelope to be delivered to her. Now I have to go and ambush the only person who I might be able to stronghold into helping me. The only person who’s on my payroll that might fear me enough to do my bidding. I pull up the address, grab the letter and walk out of my house. Miller is standing by the car waiting for me and the look he gives me is the same one he’s given me every day for the last 14 days. Loathing.

Miller overheard my words to Ollie that dreadful night and once her taillights disappeared down the driveway, Miller came out of the shadows and promptly punched me in the face. If it would have been anyone else, I would have fired them instantly and brought assault charges on them. But he put me in my place, I deserved nothing less and if he would have beat me up that night, I would have let him.

He doesn’t know the length of my efforts that I’ve gone to try to get her to speak to me. He has some idea since I’ve tasked him to follow her around when she’s not at work. Keeping tabs on her, personally dropping off flowers that I’ve ordered and even an edible arrangement. I know from his daily logs that she’s talked to him and he’s been driving her a few places. Other than that I don’t know anything about their interactions or her movements. He only reports issues on her safety.

I get in the car and he shuts the door and stalks around the car to the driver’s side. Once he’s fully seated, he asks, “Where to Mr. Devereaux?”

He meets my eye in the mirror, “We’re going to pay a visit to Mr. Raymond Thomas.”