Immoral by Nicole Dykes

Holy fuck, I’m nervous. I’ve never been this nervous in my life. We undress, kissing and taking our time, which I’m fucking grateful for, considering the nerves firing in the pit of my stomach. He’s done this before. He’s been with other men and knows what he’s doing.

Me? I’ve only been with women.

What if I fuck it all up? What if I hurt him? Or I’m just plain lame?

“Hey.” His lips brush over mine. “Breathe.”

“I’m breathing.”

He cocks an eyebrow, and it’s hard to think with his hard body pressed against mine. “Are you sure about that?”

“Shut the fuck up.” He grins and reaches next to him, opening a drawer and depositing a bottle of lube and a condom onto the bed next to us.

“Talk to me.”

“I’ve never done anal.” He quirks a brow, and I think, for the first time in my life, I’m fucking blushing.

“Never?”

I shake my head. “No. And I don’t want to fucking hurt you. Although you’re making it a little easier now.”

He grins, full of confidence and kisses my lips, spreading assurance through me. “It’s okay, rockstar. I’ve been down this road a couple of times before, and although it’s been a while, I’m fucking ready for you.” He kisses me again, his lips trailing down my neck, and I close my eyes, trying to gain control of my thundering heart and shaky hands.

“How do we do it?” He laughs, and I growl, “I know how to fucking do it, I just mean like face-to-face or do you roll over?” Christ. I sound like a fucking virgin.

I guess, in this sense, I am. He shakes his head at me, lying flat on his back. “Prep and lube. And then, however you want me.”

I settle my naked body on his, relishing the feeling of his warm skin wrapping the hard muscle underneath. When I look down into his eyes, so fucking blue and full of lust and want, I shudder.

The things he fucking does to me.

His big hand slides over my heart, and his smile is kind. “You’re trembling for me.”

I nod and lean down to kiss him. “I only remember shaking from nerves one time before. Right before my first live show. It was nerves, but it was also just plain excitement because I knew it was the start of something great, but this . . .” I kiss him again softly. “This is even better. This is everything.”

“Jesus,” he breathes, grasping the back of my hair and pulling me to his mouth as he kisses me deeply. His other hand reaches for something, and then I hear a lid popping before his hand moves between us.

I release his mouth to look down where he’s using one finger to move in and out of his hole, preparing himself for me. “Holy fuck, that’s hot.”

“Join me?” He holds out the bottle of lube, and I take it, knowing I want to take my time with him. I sit up on my knees, grabbing the condom, opening the foil packet and then sliding it down over my cock before lubing it and my fingers up generously.

I watch him fuck himself with his fingers before I grab his wrist and remove his hand, easily sliding my finger inside his tight heat.

“You’re so fucking tight, Ry. I can’t wait to be inside you.”

He throws his head back in the pillows, moving his hips along with my finger. “Another.”

I oblige, adding another finger and stretching him, my cock screaming to be where my fingers are. But I wasn’t kidding—I don’t want to hurt him. I want to ruin him for all other men. I want him to think about me and me only.

I crook my finger, seeking out that magical spot he’s found in me many times, and when I hit it, his hips jolt off the bed, and he groans loudly, “Fuck. Yes. Do that again, Grady.”

I do, but only once because I don’t want him coming yet, not until I’m buried inside him. “Are you ready for me, Bailey?”

“Jesus. Fuck.” His hips buck with my fingers as he says, “Yes. Yes. Fuck me.”

I remove my fingers and move back up over his body, the nerves once again kicking in. “I want this more than I’ve ever wanted anything in my life.”

He grabs the back of my neck with one hand and my ass with the other, urging me forward. “Then fucking take it.”

I move my cock to his entrance, prodding gently at first, making him growl again and kiss me with frustration and fury.

“You aren’t going to hurt me. But if you do, I’ll fucking love it.”

“You’re bossy in bed.”

“Damn straight.” He smiles, biting my bottom lip. “Fuck me like you mean it.”

I can’t take it anymore. Sliding the head of my cock past the first ring of muscle, I swear stars flash behind my eyes. I’m not even sure whose voice it is that makes a strangled unholy moan, but I think it might be both of us.

“Yes.”

“God, you feel fucking amazing.” I inch forward, my forehead resting against his as I push inside. “Fuck, Ry. You’re the tightest fucking thing I’ve ever been inside.”

I can’t even make out his words as he lifts his legs up, allowing me to sink all the way inside him and even deeper.

“Holy fuck.”

He grins. “Fuck me, Bell. Don’t hold back.”

And I don’t. I thrust inside his tight hole over and over again, savoring every time his ass clenches around me, strangling my cock. “Please tell me you’re close.”

“Touch me.”

I grab the lube and spread it over his cock that’s already leaking at the tip and jerk him in tandem with each thrust into his ass. “Fuck.”

“Yeah, fuck.” I shift my hips, hitting him deep and making him curse. “Holy shit. Yes. Right fucking there, Grady.”

His voice, the strangled cries are sending me over the edge and fast. “Come, Ry. I can’t hold on much longer.”

“I’m right fucking there. Don’t hold back.”

I pound into him over and over again, not wanting the moment to end but needing to come more than I need to breathe. “Oh, God. I’m gonna come.” When I feel a hot burst of cum over my hand, I finally let myself go, losing my mind when I hear him moan, “Yes, Grady. Come in my ass.” I fucking lose it, coming hard into the condom, hating that there’s a barrier between us.

“Holy fuck.” We’re a sweaty sticky mess, but I’m not moving off him. My lips meet his as we kiss, and my fingers slide through his hair. “Do you really want that?”

“Want what?” he asks breathlessly.

“Me to come inside of you?” His ass clenches around my softening cock, and damn if my body doesn’t want to fucking rally.

“Yeah, I fucking want that. When was the last time you were tested?”

I think about it. “It’s been a few months.”

“Me too. I always use condoms, but just in case, we should go get tested. I know a discreet place.”

I nod in agreement. “I’ve always used condoms too.” I lean down and kiss him. “I can’t fucking wait to be inside you bare.”

“You did alright for your first time, rockstar.”

I roll my eyes, and then he rolls our bodies over so he’s on top of me. “Please, I blew your fucking mind.”

He laughs easily at that, leaving a peck on my mouth. “You did. You really fucking did. But how is it that you haven’t ever done anal?”

I shrug, feeling slightly insecure, but this is Ry. “Every single hookup has been a blur. Only about the easiest, fastest way to get off. I haven’t put in the work for any kind of trust and barely even remember names.”

Again, my cheeks are blazing red, but he doesn’t look disgusted. “I get that. Believe me. It’s why I haven’t bottomed for a long, long time. I haven’t wanted to put in the work to get to the trust part.”

Pride and happiness shoots through me because even though we’ve both hooked up with people before, this is the first time we’ve felt a true connection.

And I wouldn’t want it to be with anyone other than my Bailey.