Beautiful Outlaw by Emily Minton
My Fault
Shay
I climb from the back of Bowie’s bike and look around. The entire parking lot is filled with cars and trucks; some are even parked on the grass at the side of the clubhouse. When I was here before, there was never more than a car or two. The lot was always filled with bikes. The bikes are still here, but the vehicles outnumber them two to one.
Turning my attention back to Bowie, I say, “There are a lot of people here.”
He simply nods and motions for me to follow him. We head to the side of the clubhouse, where Tag is now parking Bowie’s old truck. Once he and Rachel climb out, Bowie nods toward the door. I walk closely beside him, holding Rachel’s hand in mine as she carries the kitten in her other hand. Looking over my shoulder, I see Tag is only a few feet behind us, carrying Butters’ food and litter box. His eyes are clouded with anger, but the slight tremble of his body proves fear is lurking somewhere below the surface. I try to smile at him, but it comes out more of a grimace.
Bowie’s hand lands on my shoulder, drawing my attention away from Tag. “Come on, baby.”
As we step inside the clubhouse, I notice a drastic change from my last visit. It’s eerily quiet, no music or laughter filling the room. We barely make it through the door before Nina rushes over to us. She comes straight to me and wraps her arms tightly around my waist. “My boys will protect you, cariño.”
She lets go so quickly I nearly fall on my butt. Turning to Bowie, she starts to speak in Spanish. Her words are coming out so fast that I can’t make out a one of them. Her voice rises with each word she says, letting me know that she is furious at the situation. Bowie tries to respond, but she cuts him off each time.
In the middle of her tirade, Tin-Man man walks up and slings an arm over her shoulder. “I already told you, Mama. We’ll keep Shay safe.”
Bowie looks to him. “Did you call everyone in? I want a complete lock down.”
His words surprise me. I didn’t realize the entire club would be part of this. I look around and notice, for the first time, that even though the club is quiet, it is packed. Women and children fill every seat in the place. I never realized I was putting so many lives in danger. I have to bite my lip to keep from begging him to let me go again. If he would just let me leave, all these people would be safe.
“I did,” Tin-Man says with a nod. “The boys that rode up north got in about an hour ago, so everyone, all the brothers, are home.”
“Does everyone know that Cash is behind this shit?” Bowie asks, his voice sounding cold.
“I spread the word. Most of the brothers are out for blood. They’re thinking that, if he’ll go after your woman, theirs could be next.”
“Are all the families here?” Bowie asks.
Tin-Man nods again. “Yeah. Everyone but Red is back. He called in and said that Lila was at a doctor’s appointment, so he was gonna have to ride to Owensboro to get her.”
“What about the girls?” I ask, finally feeling brave enough to join the conversation.
Bowie’s eyes cut to me. “What girls?”
“Lila’s daughters, where are they?” She has only brought the kids to my house once, but I fell in love with them the minute I laid eyes on their two little faces. The twins, Hanna and Olivia are not quite two years old. They both have their mom’s big green eyes and love to laugh.
He looks to Tin-Man. “Did Red drop his girls off?”
He shakes his head. “Shit, man. I didn’t even think to ask. They’re probably with Lila’s mom, so they’ll be fine.”
“No,” Bowie says with anger in his voice. “I want everyone connected to us here. The brothers are right about Cash. He’s a vindictive son of a bitch. He’d use anything as leverage, even kids.”
A chill works its way through my body as I think of either of those children being hurt. Marcus has never physically hurt me, so I can only pray he wouldn’t hurt the girls either. But knowing Bowie’s father is involved, I’m not sure if anyone is safe.
Tin-Man nods while pulling his phone from his pocket. Bowie doesn’t wait for an update on the girls, just grabs my hand. He pulls me across the room, while the others follow behind us. He leads me down the hall and into his room. Looking from me to the rest of his family, he says, “I want y’all to stay in here.”
“Why can’t we sit out there with everyone else?” Rachel asks, placing a hand on her hip.
I can tell she’s ready to throw one of her teenage tantrums, but Bowie stops it. “You’ll stay in here because I fuckin’ told you to. I’m warning you right now, I’m not taking any shit from you today.”
Without giving her time to respond, he looks to Tag. “I’ll have another man on the door, but I want you to stay in here with the girls.”
“I won’t leave them,” Tag says as he straightens his shoulders.
With that, Bowie walks from the room without even saying goodbye. I look around to the people I’ve grown to love over the last few months and blurt out, “This is all my fault. I’m so sorry.”