Becoming His by Mariah Dietz
The next afternoon I patiently sit on Kendall’s couch as she wraps up a call to Jameson, huffing about us being on our way.
I lift an eyebrow as she throws her phone in her purse like she’s pitching a softball. “Everything okay?”
She looks over at me and we silently stare at one another for a long moment before she lets out a loud sigh and follows me down the apartment stairs where our shoes slap against the metal. I silently climb into the passenger seat of her car, watching as the words work through her mind. Usually Kendall speaks through her thoughts, rather than processing them first like I do, making me feel slightly anxious for what she’s about to tell me.
Her head leans against the headrest, gazing into the parking lot, while holding her keys in a loose fist. “I think I love him.”
She slowly turns to face me, and I see the fear etched across her face. My sister has used the “L” word in nearly half of her relationships, but I can tell this is different. This is sincere. I remain silent, allowing the words to penetrate the air as we both digest them.
“I love him,” she repeats with more conviction, turning to look at me. I smile at her reassuringly. “We’re dating best friends and I love him. What if something turns bad?”
I shrug, not even wanting to consider the possibility. “We’re all adults, and we’ve been friends, so we know if something happens, we can always go back to that.” Her lips turn down in a grimace, and I reach my hand to grip hers. “Right now everything is going great. You can’t worry about something happening that hasn’t. You’ll drive yourself crazy. Stop acting like me.” Kendall breaks into a grin and lets out a small laugh.
“Seriously, I am becoming you.” She groans, sliding her eyes back to me. “Really, though, I’ll always choose you first. I promise. Nothing will ever come between us.”
“I would never make you choose.”
“You’ll never have to. You’re more than just my sister. You’re my best friend.”
“I love you too,” I say, squeezing her hand. “You should tell him you love him.”
Kendall squeezes my hand in reply and then makes a flippant comment about my boobs looking bigger, and we spend the short car ride joking and laughing.
“Are you kidding me? For the love of all things holy!” I look up from my phone and see Max’s Jeep and Jameson’s car, then take in the moderately-sized tan house that looks too nice to have college students living in it, even if it is a rental. I look back to her in confusion and see the scowl on her face. I follow her gaze out the driver’s side window to see three scantily-clad women doing yard work.
I burst into laughter and climb out of the car with my bag in hand as Kendall follows me to the door, muttering under her breath. When the door opens Landon stands before us holding a bottle of beer and smiling.
“Hey, ladies! Do you need help with those?” he asks, lifting his beer in greeting.
“I think your neighbors are begging for help,” Kendall snaps, pushing past Landon who raises his eyebrows and looks at me in confusion. He takes a couple of steps forward and peers out the open front door to see a girl in a pair of shorts that look like she outgrew when she was seven, along with a bikini top and cowboy boots, mowing the lawn.
“If that does anything for you, please don’t tell me,” I say, taking a couple of steps inside.
Landon chuckles and closes the door as Max comes in the room, hair still wet from showering and a short layer of scruff on his jaw from not shaving today. He looks sexy as hell. I hoist my bag further up on my shoulder and lean forward to kiss him.
“What’s Kendall talking about? Rabid skanks?” he asks, taking my overnight bag from my shoulder, a smile playing on his lips.
“Your neighbors. They’re working pretty hard to get your attention.” I nod toward the large picture window beside the living room which is mostly bare except for a foosball table. “Tell her they look desperate and trashy.” Max walks to the window and peers out.
“Okay, tell me they look desperate and trashy.”
He closes the shade with a pull of the string and faces me with a growing smile. “Rabid skanks for sure.”
Landon laughs, retreating down the hallway. Max leans forward and gives me another quick kiss, taking my hand in his, and proceeds to give me a tour of their house.
It’s apparent it’s been well taken care of, with newer updates that were obviously done with care and precision. It’s clean, but feels slightly empty with sparse furniture and nearly no decorations. We finish upstairs where there’s a large room for storage and Max’s bedroom. He opens the door and I feel relieved he looks as nervous as I feel.
Max’s room is painted white, like the rest of the house. His king-sized bed sits against the far wall, covered in a navy blue comforter with a nightstand on each side, each adorned with a matching lamp. A large bureau sits across from the bed with a TV sitting atop it and a couple of framed pictures I zero in on immediately. There’s one of us from this summer, wearing our bathing suits. I’m sitting on his lap, my back pressed against his chest, wearing matching smiles so big it looks like our cheeks should ache. I don’t know where he got the picture and can’t even remember that moment, but a thrill goes through me seeing I hold a place in Max’s room. Beside it rests a picture of his mom, brothers, and him, all looking much more serious in a beautiful black and white image.
My thoughts break, hearing a soft thud. I turn and see my bag leaning against the armoire. Max has an undefined look in his eyes as his bare feet pad against the hardwood floor, stopping when he’s standing inches from me. He bends slowly, too slowly, and kisses me.
My arms wrap around his neck on their own accord, possibly his. Max’s hands sit on the curve of my hips, holding me securely to him as he pulls back and his eyes scan over me, reading my thoughts.
“I like this.” I gently brush my fingers along the length of his jaw; the sharp shadow from not shaving has favorable effects on my body. “I’d like to see you with this in four weeks and six days.”
Max grins and presses his lips to mine and gently lays me on his bed. He climbs over me, kissing his way along my neck until we hear Kendall yelling for us.
I groan as Max stops and lifts himself off of the bed, looking down at where I refuse to stand, not sure my legs will be able to support me after that kiss.
“God you’re beautiful,” he says, his head shaking as he leans down to give me a chaste kiss.
That night I triple check that I have everything for classes the next day. I’m on a waiting list for two classes: Philosophy and Bio-Chemistry. My mom was reluctant to allow me to sign up for the diverse smattering of classes ranging from political science to anatomy, however my dad encouraged it saying it was good for me to experience as much as I could to make an informed decision. Mom never seemed to fully buy it, but after I picked up another science course she seemed a little less hesitant.
Iarrive to Philosophy fifteen minutes early and feel grateful I do when I see the class is already quite full. I quickly scan the room and elect to take an empty seat in the front row, directly in front of the podium.
“Well, what do you know, it’s my neighbor! We could be carpool buddies.” I look up from my laptop to see Nate approaching. I frown and busy myself as he slides into the seat beside me.
“I didn’t see you around last night. Don’t tell me you guys are that serious. It might break my heart.” I roll my eyes, keeping them forward. Apparently ignoring him isn’t giving him the satisfaction he’s looking for, because only a few seconds tick by before he reaches out and flicks a few strands of my hair.
I grab my laptop, preparing to move, when the door opens again and a man that doesn’t look much older than us but is distinguishably a professor dressed in a brown suede sport coat and loafers. He takes a few long strides to the front of the room and stands behind the podium where he quickly scribbles something on a sheet of paper and then stalks back to the door. He opens it and tapes the note on the outside before turning to face us again.
“Alright, welcome to Philosophy. I understand there’s a waiting list to be in here, so I’ll congratulate you all on making it past the first step, which was getting here on time.”
Class is riveting. Professor Parker is incredibly intelligent and has a very dry sense of humor that I enjoy immensely. There’s something about him that draws me to him.
“Since this is Philosophy, and the oldest philosophical question that seems to be asked is which came first, the chicken or the egg, I’d like you to go and ask your friends, family, strangers for their opinions and answers on this question. Then I want you to shape your own answer and be ready to defend it on Friday. Then we’ll know who will be staying and who will be leaving.”
When he dismisses us I remain seated waiting for Nate to gather his things and leave. He makes it obvious that he has no intention of hurrying, so I grab my bag and sling it over my shoulder, making a wide berth around his seat, and follow the trickling line of students out the door.
As I arrive in the science ward, I pull out my phone to check the time and notice I have a text from Max. The edges of my lips go up in an involuntary grin as I open it.
Max: I h8 philosophy. I want U here.
Bio-Chem is boring—painfully boring—mostly attributed to our professor who speaks about three words per minute with the most monotone voice I’ve ever heard apart from Ben Stein. My mother, being from Texas, speaks slowly and with a drawl, but she’s a speed talker in comparison.
When we’re finally excused, my body itches to move and my mind feels half numb. I’d tried numerous times to make myself focus on the syllabus and what we’d be learning, but my mind wandered around faster than a pinball while she droned on. Max, and my birthday, occupies my thoughts and whether I should tell him about Nate being in my Philosophy class, and pretty much everything, other than Bio-Chem.
The warm September sun pours down on me. My eyes float to the clear skies, noting the morning clouds that seem to frequently make an appearance in San Diego mornings have lifted, and it’s another beautiful day … then I spot him.
Max leans against the wall, his foot casually propped up, while a girl from my last class talks to him, wrapping strands of her hair around her fingers. Max’s eyes skip past her and dance along the other students that mill past. I grin, gripping the strap of my backpack and approach them.
His face lights up as I catch his attention. He turns and quickly says something to the girl and pushes away from the wall to meet me as I launch myself into his arms, like it’s been weeks rather than hours since I last saw him.
“God, I needed to see you.”
I lean back to look at him. “Bad morning?”
He shrugs, obviously wanting to avoid it. “On the bright side it looks like good camping weather. How were your classes?”
“Bio-Chem was pretty mind-numbing.”
Max laughs and nods in understanding. “What about Philosophy?”
“It was good.” I hear my voice go up at the end, almost as if I’m posing my statement as a question, and feel Max’s eyes turn to me. “It was good,” I say, nodding with more conviction, “But Nate’s in the class.” I look up to gauge his reaction to the news.
“Nathan Hudson is in your class? Are you serious?” I watch the muscles in his neck and arms tighten, making his veins bulge. He runs his free hand over his head a couple of times, and I wait for him to process the news.
“Why do you call him Nate? It sounds like you guys are old pals,” he says, his eyes turning darker as they harden.
I shrug. “Because he hates it.”
Max shakes his head, trying to fight a grin and grabs my bag. “It will all work out. What is it your dad says? Let it be?”
“Actually he generally says it and then breaks into song, but yes, let it be,” I say with a laugh, watching as the rest of the tension seems to roll away from him. He reaches a hand up and strokes the left side of my face with his thumb, looking at me with his beautiful blue eyes that I’m sure Mother Nature wishes she’d painted the skies with the color. I smile and grip his fingers in mine and bring his palm around to my lips.