Where the Heart Is by Patricia Keelyn
CHAPTER ELEVEN
“Maddie!” Tammy called from the front doorway. “Are you home?”
“In here,” Maddie answered as she stepped around the two men tearing up carpet. She and Tammy reached the arched entry to the living room at the same time.
“What a nice surprise.” Maddie gave her friend a quick hug, and then, with a sweeping gesture toward the torn-up room, she said, “Welcome to the madhouse.”
Tammy glanced at the flurry of activity and smiled. “You’ve got that right. What’s going on?”
“Oh, just a little redecorating.”
“Looks like more than a little.”
Maddie laughed. “Come on. Let me show you the baby’s room.” She grabbed Tammy’s arm and led her up the stairs.
“What do you think?” Maddie stood to the side to allow Tammy to enter the nursery first.
“Wow!”
“My feelings exactly.” Maddie couldn’t get over how well the room had turned out. She’d had the walls and woodwork stripped and painted white, and then added a wallpaper border decorated with dancing circus animals in bright orange and yellow. The white-and-yellow curtains fluttering at the window were the final touch. “I just finished it yesterday.”
“You finished it?”
Maddie smiled. “Well, I didn’t do the painting. I was afraid the fumes might hurt the baby. But I hung the wallpaper and curtains.”
Tammy shot her a look of surprise before moving to the crib in the middle of the room. “And this?” she said, running her hands over the polished oak. “Where did you find it? It’s beautiful.”
Maddie joined her friend at the crib. “It’s my one big splurge. I saw it in a baby store before I left Miami. It was too expensive, but I took the manufacturer’s name and the model number.” Maddie laughed softly. “Then a couple of weeks ago I said, ‘The hell with it,’ and called the store and placed the order. Isn’t it great?”
“I’ve got to give you credit.” Tammy slipped her arm around Maddie’s shoulders and gave her a squeeze. “You’ve got style.”
“The only things I still need to get for this room are the crib accessories and a throw rug.” She grinned. “Want to go shopping?”
Tammy laughed. “You bet.”
“Good. Now I have a favor to ask.”
“How big a favor?”
Maddie shrugged. “Don’t know.”
“Well, out with it.”
Maddie bit her bottom lip. “I need a coach.”
“A coach?”
“Yeah, you know. A birthing coach. Usually, it’s the husband, but I don’t have one. I thought about Adelia—”
“I’d love to.”
“But I just couldn’t see— What did you say?”
“I’d love to be your birthing coach.”
“Really? It takes time. There are the natural-childbirth classes and all.”
“Are you kidding, Maddie?” Tammy slipped her arm through Maddie’s. “I’d be jealous if you asked anybody else. Now come on, show me what else you’ve been doing to this house.”
They spent the next few minutes touring the rest of the upstairs, all of which was in various states of renovation. They ended up in the master bedroom, which was nearly complete.
“So what’s going on?” Tammy asked. “Why are you tearing your house apart?”
Maddie plopped down on the bed. “Come here, sit down. It’s not safe downstairs.”
“Well?” Tammy prompted after she’d joined Maddie.
Maddie pulled her knees up to sit cross-legged, then leaned back against the headboard. “Mother was here a few weeks ago.”
“That must have been interesting.”
“She just showed up one day and demanded that I eat dinner with her every Sunday. She wants to be kept informed about the baby’s progress.”
“Adelia?”
Maddie grinned. “Hard to believe, isn’t it?”
Other than Nick, Tammy had been the only one of her childhood friends who’d known the details of her relationship with Adelia. “Maybe the Ice Queen is thawing out in her old age.”
“Maybe.” Maddie let her thoughts drift back to the last few evenings she’d spent at her mother’s house. “We’ve actually been getting along pretty well. Not great, but at least we’re not fighting.”
“Babies have that effect on people.”
“Do you think that’s what it is?”
Tammy shrugged. “Who knows?”
“Well, anyway,” Maddie said with a wave of her hand. “Getting back to the house. When Mother was here, I took a good look at the place. Unfortunately, I had to agree with her. A face-lift was long overdue.”
“What about the furniture I saw getting hauled away downstairs?”
“It was beyond salvation. I think it was actually on its last legs when Daddy bought it.” Maddie laughed lightly, remembering how she’d helped her father search through garage sales to find furnishings. “Besides, my furniture will be arriving in a couple of weeks.”
Tammy looked surprised. “So the sale of your condo went through?”
“The closing is next week.”
“Are you going to Miami?”
Maddie shook her head. “I sent Roger a limited power of attorney so I wouldn’t have to.”
“Maddie, I thought—”
“It’s okay. It’s over.”
“Maddie, maybe if you saw him …”
“It wouldn’t make any difference. Whatever I felt for him is gone, Tammy. I can’t love someone who doesn’t love me. Or my baby.”
Tammy studied her for a moment. “And you’re okay?”
Maddie thought about that for a moment before answering. “Actually I’m fine. Better than fine. I’m enjoying fixing up the house. And I’ve started writing again and working over at the Finder.” She chuckled. “Carl Katz hasn’t changed one bit in sixteen years. He’s still a tyrant of an editor. And baby here,” she rested her hand on her stomach, “has been kicking up a storm. So, yeah, I’m feeling pretty good right now.”
“That’s wonderful, Maddie.” Tammy smiled hopefully. “So, have you ever thought of staying in Felton after the baby comes?”
“No.” She had no intention of staying. Did she? “I don’t think so, Tammy. What would I do here?”
Tammy shrugged. “Oh, I don’t know. Work for Carl Katz?”
Maddie laughed and rolled her eyes skyward. “And what would I do for a wage I could live on?”
“I’m sure you could do something, Maddie.” Tammy’s smile faded. “After all, you’re the one with the fancy degree.”
“And the terrific job with an international consulting firm. Which, by the way, doesn’t happen to have offices in greater Felton.”
Tammy brushed Maddie’s argument aside with a wave of her hand. “Details.”
Maddie laughed again and shook her head.
“Seriously, Maddie. I’m not trying to push you or anything.”
“Yes, you are.”
“This is your hometown. And I thought since you were putting so much work into the house—”
“Tammy.” Maddie reached over and lay a hand on her friend’s arm. “I don’t know what I’m going to do after the baby’s born. Okay? And as far as fixing up the house goes, I’m doing it because it needs it, and I’m tired of living in dark musty rooms.”
“But you’re spending a lot of money.”
“I’ll get back whatever I’ve put into this house. Whether I rent it again, sell it, or just hold on to it. Meanwhile, I’m making it livable.”
“But I thought you said you didn’t like the idea of strangers living here.”
Maddie thought of the peace she’d made with her father’s memory. “Holding on to this house won’t bring my father back.”
“I guess that makes sense.” But Tammy didn’t look convinced.
“Come on,” Maddie said. “Let’s go downstairs and see what all those hardworking men are doing to my living room.” Maddie pushed herself off the bed and headed for the door.
Tammy followed, but stopped before they got to the stairs. “How are things with Nick?”
Maddie stopped, too, feeling the heat staining her cheeks. “Okay.”
“Maybe I shouldn’t have asked?”
“No. It’s nothing like that.” Maddie shook her head and walked toward the stairs. For a moment, she considered telling Tammy about Nick and Diana, but decided not to. It wasn’t her story to tell. “We had a disagreement a few weeks ago. But it’s okay now.”
“So are you spending time together?”
“No.”
“Why?”
“Don’t start on me, Tammy,” Maddie said, her words sharper than she’d intended. Then, without looking at her friend, she added, “Sorry. It’s just that Nick and I are friends. That’s all.” If only she could convince both herself and Nick of that. Not to mention Jon.
“That’s what you told me in high school.” They’d reached the bottom of the stairs, and then Tammy leaned closer to Maddie so no one else could hear. “I didn’t believe you then, and I don’t believe you now.”
Maddie crossed her arms and spun around to face her friend. “Well, it may not have been true before, but it is now. Neither one of us is in a position for our relationship to become anything more. Nick’s still mourning Diana’s death and having a hell of a time. And I,” she hesitated a moment, “I’m just not ready to get involved again right now.”
“Maddie, you’re already involved.”
“I have a baby to consider.” Maddie turned and headed toward the kitchen in the back of the house. “And you forget, Nick’s not exactly a saint.”
“That was sixteen years ago.” Tammy followed Maddie into the kitchen. “I know he hurt you back then. But you can bet Nick wouldn’t have run off and left you alone with that baby.”
Maddie froze.
“Don’t you think I know?” Tammy said from behind her. “Don’t you think the whole town knew why Nick married Diana Eagen?”
Maddie turned and stared at her friend.
“Ted would never have let his only daughter marry someone like Nick Ryan if he’d had any other choice.”
“Ted liked Nick,” Maddie insisted.
“As a son-in-law? Wake up, Maddie.” Tammy crossed her arms. “Diana got pregnant, and Ted got Nick into med school so fast it should have been illegal. Then he spirited them both off to Atlanta.”
Maddie shook her head, not wanting to believe she’d been the only one who hadn’t known.
“Don’t tell me you didn’t know?”
“No. I mean yes. Nick just told me a few weeks ago.”
Tammy took a step closer and put a reassuring hand on Maddie’s arm. “The point is, my very dear friend, Nick did the right thing by Diana. He may have hurt you in the process, but at eighteen, he had enough courage and moral fiber to take responsibility for his actions. Even though it cost him the one thing he wanted most in the world.”
Maddie looked up and met her friend’s gaze. “He wanted to become a doctor.”
“He wanted you.”
Tammy’s words echoed in Maddie’s head for days. It was true. Nick never would have left her alone and pregnant. He’d gone and married a woman he didn’t love because she was expecting his child. Maddie wondered if she was doing the right thing keeping him at arm’s length. Or even if she’d be able to do so for much longer.
The evening started out normally enough—or at least as normally as things ever got with Adelia. She and Maddie sat in the dining room while Frances served an exquisitely prepared meal. More than once, Maddie had thought about suggesting they give Frances the night off, order a pizza, and sit in the kitchen. Somehow, she didn’t think Adelia would go for it.
On this particular night, however, Maddie found it harder than usual to endure the staid formality of her mother’s Sunday-night dinners. She’d been thinking a lot about her father lately—probably due to the amount of time she’d spent with Jon, trying to help him adjust to his mother’s death—and there were things she wanted to know. Things only Adelia could tell her.
During dinner, Maddie mentally rehearsed what she wanted to say. Several times, her mother caught her mind wandering from their conversation. Finally, the meal was over, and the two of them went into the sitting room.
“Frances will bring our tea in here,” Adelia said, sinking gracefully into her favorite chair and motioning for Maddie to take a seat on the couch.
“Mother.” For once, Maddie was going to be direct with this woman. “There’s something I want to talk to you about.”
“Oh?”
Frances came in with their tea, and Maddie waited until she’d left to speak. “I went out to the cemetery today. To visit Daddy’s grave.”
Her mother frowned but said nothing as she poured tea for the two of them.
“Actually I’ve been going every Sunday for weeks.”
Adelia remained silent.
“Do you ever go out there?”
“Why on earth would I do that?”
“He was your husband and the father of your only child.” Maddie leaned forward in her chair. “You must have loved him once.”
“That was a long time ago.”
“Still—”
“Why are we talking about this, Madeleine?” Maddie thought she detected a slight tremor in her mother’s voice. “Let’s talk about something else. How are you feeling?”
“Don’t change the subject, Mother. I want to know about you and Daddy.”
“Your father and I separated two years before his death.”
“But you never divorced him.”
Adelia sank back into her chair, forgetting the tea she’d just poured. “Divorce was never an option.”
“Why?”
“It just wasn’t done. Not then.”
“I see. But kicking him out of your house and breaking up the family was okay?”
“There are things you don’t know.” Adelia lifted her chin stiffly. “Things you don’t understand.”
“Tell me. I’d like to understand.”
“Why? Isn’t it enough to know that I did what was best at the time?”
“For whom? Certainly not for me.”
“Ah, yes.” Adelia folded her hands in her lap. Her voice took on the quality of chipped ice. “You were always Davis’s little angel. He spoiled you rotten. And in your eyes, he could do no wrong.”
“That’s not fair, Mother.”
“Isn’t it?” Adelia unfolded her hands and gripped the arms of the chair. “Well, let me assure you that when I asked your father to leave this house, it was for your sake.”
“Please, don’t give me that. I think it’s a little late to play the good-mother role.”
“Oh, really. And what about you, Madeleine? Do you think you were the perfect daughter?”
“I was a child. And I was alone.”
Adelia shook her head. “Don’t expect me to weep for you. You never wanted for a thing.”
“Things. That’s all you ever gave me.” Years of suppressed anger boiled to the surface. “Clothes, money, cars … they were just things.”
“That’s all you ever wanted from me.”
“That’s not true. I needed more.”
“You never needed anything or anyone, Madeleine,” Adelia claimed with a flick of her wrist. “You had yourself. It was always enough.”
“It was never enough. I needed my father.”
An angry silence crashed down around them, and Maddie realized she’d gone too far. But there was no pulling the words back.
When Adelia spoke, her voice trembled with carefully controlled fury. “Do you really want to know why I asked Davis to leave this house?”
Maddie took a deep breath, suddenly, inexplicably, afraid of the answer. “Yes.”
“Be very careful before you decide you really want to know, Madeleine.” Adelia’s eyes flashed, their usual cool depths becoming fiery blue flames. “You may not like what you hear.”
Maddie had never seen her mother this angry. Nevertheless, she needed to know what had happened between her parents. “Tell me.”
Adelia let the silence stretch for several long moments before she spoke. “Women.” She met Maddie’s gaze squarely. “One after another.”
Maddie shook her head, refusing to believe what her mother implied, certain she’d misunderstood.
“Oh, yes,” Adelia insisted. “Your father always had a way with the ladies. And I put up with it for a long time. Because of you. Because we were a family.” Taking a deep breath, she drew herself up. “But when he started bringing them into this house, I knew I couldn’t let it go on.” Maddie shook her head, but her mother continued. “I knew if I continued to ignore his infidelities, you would eventually find out. Sooner or later, you’d come home at the wrong time.”
“Why are you saying these things?”
“I never wanted you to know. But maybe it’s time you knew your father the man, not the saint you made of him.”
“I don’t believe you.”
“No?” Adelia shook her head, suddenly looking very tired. “I think you do.”
Maddie got up from the couch and moved to the window. Outside, the late-afternoon light cast its long shadows across her mother’s manicured front lawn. In the distance, she could hear a mower start up and children playing. Normal, happy, everyday sounds. Nothing like the angry words that had just filled this room.
“Madeleine?”
“No!” She turned to face Adelia. “That’s enough, Mother.”
“Madeleine—”
“I don’t know why you’re doing this.” Moving quickly across the room, Maddie grabbed her purse and headed for the door. “But I won’t listen to any more.” Her mother called after her, but Maddie kept walking, slamming the front door behind her.
Within minutes, she was home, curled in her rocking chair under an afghan. But even as she’d stormed out of her mother’s house, she’d known she wouldn’t be able to hide from her mother’s words. Not this time. Not anymore. She was through running away. She didn’t know if Adelia had spoken the truth, but she knew she’d have to find out.
Getting up from the chair, she headed for the attic. It was filled with boxes of her father’s things: records, papers, personal belongings. If her father had done what Adelia claimed, she should be able to find proof up there somewhere.
Jon finished his last exam early and hurried out into the hall. The final bell of the school year would ring in about twenty minutes, and with it would go his last excuse to talk to Anna. All around him, other kids ignored the reprimands from teachers to keep quiet. Exams might have still been in progress, but everyone laughed and talked, elated that summer had begun.
“Hey, Jon,” called Brad Severyn, one of the guys who’d been in Jon’s gym class. “How’d you make out in math?”
Jon gave him a thumbs-up. “Okay. You?”
“I did all right.” Brad gave him a quick nod and turned toward the exit. “Thanks for the help.”
“Sure. No problem.”
“Hey,” Brad called back over his shoulder. “See you around this summer.”
“Yeah.” When had Brad Severyn, most likely candidate for next year’s first-string quarterback position, started getting friendly? Sure, Jon had helped him with a few math problems, but the guy basically knew the stuff already. Jon had just given him a few pointers.
Shaking his head, Jon headed for his locker. He’d cleaned it out yesterday, but still took his time gathering the couple of books he’d tossed into it this morning. Finally, he closed the locker and dropped the combination lock into his book bag. Another glance at the wall clock told him he’d only used up ten minutes. Another ten to kill.
He walked around to the front exit, passing the classroom where Anna was taking her algebra final. He glanced through the glass windows as he passed and saw her near the front, head bent over her desk. Suddenly, he snapped his fingers as if he’d just remembered something. Turning on his heel, he headed back in the direction he’d come, stopping at the bulletin board outside the science lab. The biology grades had been posted yesterday, so Jon already knew how he’d done, but he loitered in front of the board, reading the notices, anyway.
Finally, the bell rang, and within seconds, the remaining students poured out from the classrooms, filling the halls with shouts and whoops. Jon picked his way through the rowdy crowd, striding back toward the classroom where he’d seen Anna. When he spotted her, he slowed to a stroll, looking the other way as he walked by.
“Jon!”
Turning, he feigned surprise at seeing her. “Oh, hey,” he said, shifting his book bag and taking a step toward her. “How’d it go?”
“I did it!” she said, bounding toward him. “I think I aced it.”
“All right.” Jon broke into a huge grin. “I knew you could. When do you find out your grade?”
Anna grinned back and hugged her books tight against her chest. “Mr. Dobb said he’d post them day after tomorrow.”
“Okay. We’ll walk over and check it out.”
Anna fell instantly silent, and Jon realized he’d just offered to spend time with her doing something other than math. Had he meant to do that?
“That’ll be great.” Anna shifted her gaze away, and Jon suddenly felt stupid. After their argument a couple of weeks ago, she probably didn’t want anything to do with him.
“Hey, if you have other plans,” Jon said, “that’s okay.”
“No.” Anna gaze snapped back to his. “I mean, I’d like the company.” With a nervous smile, she added, “Besides, I could be wrong, you know. I might not have done so hot on the test. And then I’ll be really bummed out.”
“I bet you did great,” Jon said, relief flooding him. For a few moments they just stood there, neither of them knowing how to break the awkward silence. Finally, Anna said, “I’m sorry for what I said the other day. Sometimes my mouth gets away from me.”
“Yeah. It does.” Jon grinned again. “But I kind of like it.”
“You do?”
“Yeah. And besides …” He reached down to take her hand. “I was being a bit of a jerk myself.”
“Yeah, you were.” With a glance down at their joined hands, she added, “But I’ve gotten kind of used to it.”
“Come on.” Jon gave her hand a tug. “I’ll walk you home?”
Anna’s eyes glowed. “Sure. That’d be great.” Heading for the main entrance, Jon thought of little else other than the way Anna’s hand felt in his. It was so small, and her skin was so smooth. He threw a sideways glance at her and caught her doing the same thing. She smiled shyly and looked away. Yeah, she was okay.
The moment they stepped outside, Jon spotted Roc and Fatso standing with a group of boys near the stone stairs leading down to the street. Anna’s hand tensed in his, and Jon knew she’d spotted the group too. He and Anna had two choices. They could go back inside and leave the school by a different exit, or they could try to walk by, hoping Roc wouldn’t notice.
All his options disappeared when Fatso spotted them. “Hey, it’s Johnnie-boy.”
The other boys surrounding Roc turned, and Roc stepped out from their midst.
Jon gave Anna’s hand a reassuring squeeze and continued walking. “Don’t worry. They’re not going to cause any trouble out here in the open.”
“Right,” she answered sarcastically. But she didn’t pull away.
“Well, now isn’t that cute,” Roc said as he stepped in front of Jon and Anna, stopping them. “Einstein’s taken up with the sheriff’s daughter. Uh-oh. I better be real careful.”
Jon tightened his hold on Anna’s hand. “Go to hell, Roc.”
“Ohhhh. Nasty.” Roc shot a glance at the group of boys standing behind him before turning back to Jon. “You’re starting to scare me, Jon-boy. Look, I’m shaking.”
Fatso giggled, while the rest of the group behind Roc stirred uncomfortably.
Jon spotted Brad Severyn standing on the edge of the group. So much for new friends.
“How’s your head, Jon-boy?” Roc said after a few moments of silence. “Did your daddy fix it up all right?”
Jon fought down his temper. He knew damn well that Roc was goading him, trying to get him to take the first swing. But this time, Jon wasn’t going to bite. Shifting his book bag higher on his shoulder, he kept his free hand on the strap. “What do you want, Roc?”
Roc took a step closer. “I’ve got a score to settle with you, city boy.”
Jon laughed. “That’s great, Roc. You pulled a knife on me, and now you’ve got a score to settle. That’s about par for the brains you haven’t got in that head of yours.”
Roc took another step forward, stabbing Jon with an accusatory finger. “You squealed on me, you stupid pussy.”
“Pusseee, pusseee,” Fatso chanted.
Jon didn’t bother to deny it. It wouldn’t have done any good. “Keep your paws off me, Roc.” Dropping Anna’s hand, Jon knocked Roc’s finger away from his chest.
“Hey, man.” Brad Severyn stepped up and grabbed Roc’s arm. “Forget it, Roc. You cut him. You’re even.”
Roc shrugged off Brad’s hand. “I ain’t gonna forget it.”
“Yeah, we ain’t gonna forget nothin’.” Fatso moved up beside Roc.
“Jon-boy and Little Miss Sheriff’s Daughter here got me suspended,” Roc said between clenched teeth. “Now I’m stuck in summer school if I don’t want to get held back.”
Anna moved forward, her eyes sparking. “We couldn’t have that happen, now could we, Roc? What are you, two or three years behind now?”
“Why you little—” Roc lunged toward her, but Jon stepped between them, bringing Roc up short.
Fatso moved in closer and gave Jon a shove.
“Hey, man, I said leave it.” Brad grabbed Fatso’s arm and pulled him away from Jon.
“Yeah, Roc. Forget it,” called another boy from the group.
Roc turned on Brad. “Stay out of this, Severyn.”
“I’m not staying out of it as long as it’s two against one.” Brad stepped between Roc and Jon. “If you want to mess Ryan up all by yourself, it ain’t no skin off my back. But I’m not gonna stand here and let that monkey of yours—” he gestured at Fatso “—hold him down so you can have your shot.”
Roc’s face flared crimson, his eyes fixed on Brad. “You just made a big mistake, Severyn.”
“Yeah, well.” Brad took a step backward and shoved his hands into his pockets, “I ain’t gonna cry over it.”
Roc glared at him for a few more minutes before turning to Jon and Anna. “We ain’t done, city boy. So you better just watch your ass.” Roc spun on his heel. “Come on, let’s move. It stinks around here.”
Roc and his entourage headed down the steps, while a couple of them threw glances back at Brad.
“Thanks, Brad,” Jon said. “I owe you.”
“I didn’t like the odds.”
Jon chuckled. “Me neither.”
Brad laughed. “You could have fooled me, Ryan. You sure got guts.” Then with a shrug and a wink at Anna, he headed toward the parking lot. “See you around.”
Jon took Anna’s arm and led her down the steps. “So is it over yet?” he asked after they’d put some distance between them and the school.
“No way,” Anna said. “It just got worse.”
“Damn, I was afraid you’d say that.”
“He’s going to come after you. And he isn’t going to fight fair.”
“Well, I’ve just got to figure out a way to make it fair,” Jon said, and then slowed, an idea beginning to form in his head. “Up ’till now, it’s all been his way. When he wants. Where he wants. Surrounded by his friends. Maybe it’s time I take the offensive.”
“What are you talking about?”
“I’ve got to figure out a way to get him alone without a knife, and then beat his butt.”
“Or get beaten.”
Jon looked down at her and grinned. “Well, that is a possibility. But, either way, it’s over.”
“Are you sure?”
“It can’t fail.”
