Bear by Lily J. Adams
Chapter Eighteen: Keep On Running
Delphia
The tears just wouldn’t stop. It was like a leaky faucet that refused to turn off. My hoodie kept my face covered as the driver hummed along to the tunes of the radio. As if it was a normal day, instead of a day when a young woman was escaping a murderer. Every now and then I sniffled into the side of the fleece trying to keep my nasal passages clear. I was at my wits end and didn’t know which way to go.
I was leaving everything I knew and loved to start a brand-new life that I didn’t even want. I missed Bear already and it hadn’t been but a few hours. I missed my parents. I missed Brendan being annoying at the gas station and my grumpy boss who was most likely pissed that I never came back to work.
I finally emerged from the crying episode while wallowing in deep regret about the unfolding events of my life. I opened my eyes slightly and peeked out of the window to see where we were. We were rolling along the highway through a cute town with weatherboard stores and antique shops.
There were colorful streamers wrapped around poles along with corrugated cows with painted faces and old rusty milk cartons being sold for one dollar apiece. Hanging baskets of flowers swung in the light breeze over a teal painted cafe. Some people sat at the round tables socializing and sipping their morning drinks quietly. The town we were passing through continued to whir past us.
A small part of me tried to cling to something positive. Like this might be a good thing. I would be able to start again, in a new place and plant my roots. I wondered if they had a gas station I could work at or whether I should try something new in my life.
Bear kept ringing and I wished he wouldn’t. I wanted him to fade away. There was no hope for us. I was a dangerous person to be with. I would get people killed, and my head kept ringing with the same sentence running through it.
This is best for everyone. This is best for everyone. Stay away from me.
The bus rolled on but the driver made an announcement on the speaker, “Good morning, folks. I trust that you had a good sleep. I want to let you know that we will soon be approaching the lovely town of Arver which is a personal favorite of mine in the next twenty minutes. We have twenty minutes there.”
I suddenly realized that my parents didn’t deserve to be left hanging, so I gave them a call earlier than I’d planned. I needed to talk to someone or I might just go crazy sitting in this seat. “Hi, Dad. How are you?” I asked in a mumble as I chewed my lip a bit.
“I’m good, Delph. How are you? You thought any more about coming home and spending some time with us? We don’t like that you’re over there all alone with that Rocky guy still on the loose. I’m worried about you.” He repeated the same old talking points he’d been harping for the last few months.
“Dad. I’m okay. Remember I told you I had the motorcycle club looking out for me. They have been making sure. I’ve been getting a ride home from them. It’s like my own form of personal security.”
“Well, I still think you would be better off here with us where we can see you, but as long as you check in with us and keep us up to date.”
“That’s why I’m calling. I’m taking a backward step for a while. I’m going away for a little bit. There’s an article about all of this that’s coming out and it’s a big deal. Please don’t freak out, but if anything happens, please contact the police.”
My father started to breathe heavily into the phone. “Delphia. What are you talking about? Why are you speaking in code? This isn’t like you. Tell me what’s going on.” His voice was raised, and the frantic pitch that my father escalated to when things were going awry was about to kick in.
“Stop. Just stop and don’t come looking for me. I need a time out. Let me breathe a little. I will let you know if there’s anything to be worried about.”
“Delphia. I’m your father and I can’t sit idle knowing you’re somewhere I don’t know about. Can you at least tell me where you’re going?” His voice was rising the further along the conversation moved.
“No,” I punched out firmly, “Because then all you’re going to do is follow me. I’m less than 120 miles from Holbeck. I can tell you that much.”
A gush of air left my father’s lips as he replied, “It’s up to you, just promise me that you will call when you get wherever you’re going.” My father let the conversation die, a little wilted from my strong stance not to tell him where I was exactly.
“When I get where I’m going I’ll call you.”
“Delphia…” my father called my name with a slight reservation.
“Yes, Dad?”
“Please tell me that you’re safe.”
“Yes. I’m safe.”
“Okay. That’s all. Have a safe trip and call me when you get to the other end.”
“Bye Dad.” I ended the call only to get another ping coming through from Bear. I ignored the call, so I didn’t annoy the bus driver. Shoving the phone deep into my bag, I looked out the window, but I couldn’t enjoy it.
Rocky had followed me to the bus, and he knew that I was on the run.
How did he know? Where had Rocky been hiding in the shadows? I tucked behind my hoodie a little more, feeling insecure and lonely as dark thoughts ran a track through my mind. He must have been watching me the whole time. I’d been diligent, hadn’t I? Sneaking out of Bear’s house in the dark and down the alleys? He must have been watching my house though. Damnit, I messed up by going back there.
“Not long to go now. Pulling into Arver in five minutes. Please don’t forget to take your belongings off the bus with you.”
The driver’s call to disengage from the bus was making me nervous. I would wait for everyone else to get off the bus first to make sure it was safe. I didn’t want Rocky showing up. What if he followed the bus route? What if he knew where I was going?
He didn’t know the stop, but he knew to find me at the bus depot. I seemed destined to lead a life on the run. I wanted to call Bear and tell him, but it didn’t seem right. It seemed pointless to me, because even with his protection, Rocky might go through Bear literally. I reminded myself of the reason I was on this bus. To protect Bear. No, I could not drag him back into the danger zone.
The large tires of the bus rolled over the gravel and into the parking lot of a bunch of small convenience stores. People moved to the exit, and my whole body felt as if it was about to break down from fear. Once everyone got off, my eyes moved to the outside, scanning the space vigilantly.
“Are you going to get out and get some fresh air?” the bus driver asked. “This will be your last chance to go to the public toilet unless you want to go to the toilet that’s at the back of the bus, and that’s not the best. I wouldn’t advise it. The door doesn’t shut properly, among other things.” The driver stretched his arms out as if he was on monkey bars in the door. “Nice shops here too. You can pick up some trinkets before you get out at Cutover. That’s your stop right?”
“Yes,” I answered in a mild voice.
The driver regarded me with a longer look as I unraveled myself from the seat and peeped out once again. “You might regret it if you don’t get out now. Time’s ticking. Go ahead, go take a look,” he coaxed.
“I will thank you.” I took the invitation and grabbed my purse, sliding it in the pocket of my hoodie as I walked over to the inviting set of shops. It appeared to be a little arcade and like the driver said, a good place to stock up on snacks. My hoodie stayed on. I didn’t want anyone to see me regardless of whether it looked like the coast was clear. I was close to ninety-percent sure that Rocky knew I was on the bus out of Holbeck as he’d become eerily obsessed with tracking me like a wild animal.
I found a restroom at one of the cafes. Then I purchased a bag of chips, water, and some gummy bears and hurried back onto the bus, holding my breath. I couldn’t help myself. I looked at my phone and sure enough there were text messages galore from Bear.
Delphia. Please tell me where you are. I can help you.
I wouldn’t have gotten hurt. You needed to trust that.
Talk to me, Delphia.
I felt the tears squeeze out from my eyes as I opened my bag of chips, ready to cry into them as well. In fact, one of my tears dropped into them and I ate the tear-soaked chip, wishing for another life to magically appear in front of me.
A few minutes later as we took off, the bus patrons found their seats. I rubber necked out the window to see if Rocky was anywhere. There weren’t obvious signs of him, but it didn’t stop me from looking.
The bus driver whistled as the bus lurched forward. “See there, you got yourself some snacks and stretched your legs. Not too bad a town, Arver. Wait till Cutover. You’ll enjoy it there. How long are you staying?”
“I don’t know, indefinitely,” I expressed to him despondently.
“You sure don’t sound happy about it.”
“I’m fine about it. Thanks.” My tone was blunt enough to let him know to leave me the hell alone and that if he asked me another question, I was liable to explode.
I ate the rest of my chips in silence with headphones on to drown out the demons in my head. The vibration of my cell phone caused me to pick the headphones out of my ears as I answered a call I wanted to avoid.
“Delphia. Why are you doing this?” my mom queried anxiously. “Why wouldn’t you tell us that you’re going to up and leave? There must be something wrong. There has to be, otherwise you wouldn’t do this.”
“Mom, there is nothing wrong.” A bold-faced lie, but I didn’t know any other way with her. She would have a breakdown if she knew that Rocky was hunting me. “I need some me time. I’ll be back.” The last part was a potential lie too. I would have to sort some things out in Holbeck, but I didn’t know if I would be the one to do it. My brain and heart wasn’t in the right place for that.
“There has to be something,” she insisted. “You wouldn’t just up and leave like you have. It’s really out of character for you.”
“I get it, but I’m okay. I’m a little burned out with everything and thinking about Deon.” I knew this would get her to calm down.
Once I said my brother’s name, she sighed loudly through the phone. “Must be tough for you. I think about him every day. I want you to call me when you’re away. Call me tomorrow and check in. I want to know where you are. It’s for your safety. Don’t just leave like that without telling anybody where you are.” My mother’s scolding voice through the phone was coming from a place of love.
I knew that. I would be worried if my young daughter got up and left too, but it could be worse.
Bear could have been killed and no matter which way it went for me…
I would want to be D-E-A-D.
