The Silent Highlander by Donna Fletcher
Chapter 7
Saber swung the axe again and again, splitting log after log. He had removed his shirt, the exertion heating him or it might have been his own anger at himself that caused it. The chill in the air didn’t bother him in the least and he wondered if the heat of hell had already laid its scorching hand on him. The problem he feared was that he opened a path for hell to touch his wife.
He had warned himself to stay away from her, but since that first day in the market, when she used him to shield herself from not being seen, he had found he hadn’t been able to get her out of his mind. Images of her lingered there until he finally found an excuse to go see her. He could have easily tended the splinter in his finger. God knew he had seen to worse wounds on himself. But he wanted to see Elysia, look into those lovely, soft green eyes of hers that were filled with such sweetness and kindness that it melted the heart.
Elysia didn’t possess her sister Annis’s stark beauty, hers was more a soft beauty that drew you in without even realizing it. And the way strands of her light brown hair would always fall loose from the combs that fought to contain it had him itching to constantly brush the stubborn strands off her face. And if all of that wasn’t enough to have her endlessly in his thoughts, there was her wee size. He actually feared crushing her if he held her too tight and yet that was what he ached to do, hold her tight. He also feared how vulnerable she was with her wee size, the thought stirring his ire even more since he’d tear anyone apart with his bare hands who would dare hurt her.
The axe came down once again so hard that it split the log completely in two and sent the pieces flying. He cringed thinking of how he had turned her marriage proposal down. He had seen the hurt in her eyes and it had broken his heart, especially since his instinct or perhaps it was his heart that had wanted to rush and accept. It took all the strength he had to shake his head at her.
He swung the axe to embed it in a log, then went and picked up the pieces to add to the growing pile he had stacked near the cottage. He’d been a fool for returning to her, but he had missed seeing her smile when she looked upon him or how her eyes lit with delight when she talked to him. Most of all, he had missed his arm around her waist when he sat her on his knee and the way her soft breath would catch his cheek when she spoke, and then there was the kiss.
He hadn’t been able to resist and her eager response only fueled his desire for her. He should have realized no good would come of it—no good for her. He should have protected her better. But God help him, he favored her, cared for her, and he feared he was falling in love with her—something he had sworn to himself he would never allow himself to do.
He went to the rain barrel and scooped up a handful of water and lowered his face to give it a good splash. He did it a few times, the water running down his chest as well.
How would he keep his wife safe when her biggest threat was him?
He turned, intending to dry himself off and make himself presentable so he could return for his wife and walk her home. He stopped when he spotted her approaching the croft. Her steps were slow and at times halting and her scrunched brow alerted to her deep thought. It was when he caught the glisten of unshed tears in her eyes that he hurried to her.
Elysia shook her head, trying to shake away her troubling thoughts when she caught sight of her husband. Her breath caught for a moment, seeing him bare-chested and the damp sheen that highlighted his thick muscles. She stopped suddenly, realizing the size and strength of him.
Saber didn’t halt his steps. He went straight to his wife and hooked her waist with his arm and forced the words from his mouth. “What’s wrong?”
“You shouldn’t speak yet,” she scolded, though was pleased his voice didn’t sound raspy.
“Tell me!”
She drew her head back, surprised by the strong command.
Saber silently berated himself when he saw how his strong remark caused her to retreat from him some. His greatest worry was that she would come to fear him and that was something he never wanted, not ever.
He did the only thing he could think of to soothe her—he kissed her. A gentle kiss that she responded to and he felt her relax against him. He rested his brow to hers when the kiss ended and he lingered like that for a few moments before he took hold of her hand and walked to the cottage.
Elysia entered before Saber and would have come to a surprised halt if her husband hadn’t urged her gently in with his hand to the small of her back. Inside was much smaller than she expected, but then the place had been for Saber alone. One small table, a bench, and a bed she wondered would even fit one occupant. How two would manage in it was questionable.
“I will see to preparing us food,” she said, needing something to do to busy her mind.
Saber thought differently and took her hand and walked over to the bed to sit and ease her down on his lap. He gently pressed his finger at the corner of her eye, capturing an unshed tear. He held it in front of her and shrugged.
She sighed. “I got upset over something I learned, but since it is our wedding day, I didn’t want to burden you with it.”
He tapped her lips, then his chest, letting her know he wished to hear it.
Rory’s words came back to her and along with them the fear. “Rory told me that the woman he loved and failed, Shona, was the third wife of the cursed lord. She died after being married to Lord Rannick for only three days. I worry what will happen to Bliss. Will the curse claim her quickly? Will Annis have no time to save her? And is there nothing I can do to help her?” Tears threatened her eyes again. “I don’t want to lose Bliss, but I have no idea what to do to help her. Rory also said something else to me that people aren’t always who we think they are and I should be careful who I trust.”
Saber raised his hand as if lifting a tankard to his lips and shrugged.
Elysia easily understood what he asked. “Aye, Rory had been drinking.”
He tilted his head and shrugged again.
“You think his remark was due to his drinking and I would agree, except—I wondered if he drinks to forget and that there was some truth to his words.” She turned an anxious glance on him. “Will you take me to visit Bliss so I can see for myself that she is well?”
“Too soon,” he said, his voice a mere whisper.
She sighed again. “I suppose you’re right. She has probably barely arrived there and knowing my sister, she will get word to me as soon as she can.”
He nodded, agreeing with her.
Elysia rested her head on his bare shoulder. “I am glad I have you, Saber.”
He patted her chest then his chest, letting her know he was glad to have her.
She raised her head and smiled. “We are lucky to have found each other.”
He didn’t get a chance to nod in agreement. She took hold of his face and kissed him. He loved that she kissed him so freely, without a bit of hesitation, and got so much enjoyment from it, which in turn delighted him.
He let himself fall back on the bed, moving her to lie on top of him, the bed far too narrow for them both. His hands went to her backside to cup it as their kiss turned ardent. His hands itched to slip beneath her garments and explore and he didn’t think she would stop him. The problem was he didn’t think he could stop himself from coupling with her and he didn’t want to take a chance of his seed taking root.
She sprung up suddenly, her small hands pressed against his chest. “I haven’t taken the brew yet.” She scrambled off him. “I will go get what I need to make the brew.”
He grabbed her arm before she could get away from him. He shook his head when she turned and looked at him and tapped his chest and pointed to her.
“You don’t have to go with me.” His look told Elysia otherwise and she was beginning to realize that when her husband made up his mind there was no changing it. She smiled. “You need your shirt.”
* * *
They enteredthe village to find men gathered in talk and women looking anxious. Saber walked her to the cottage and let her know to wait there for him to return.
“You go to see what has everyone upset?” Elysia asked.
He nodded and made a point of letting her know again that she was to stay put until he returned.
“I’ll be here waiting for you,” she assured him and wasn’t surprised he didn’t leave until she was safely inside the cottage.
The silence of the cottage ran a chill through her as did the cold hearth that had always had a fire burning. She hurried to start a fire and return warmth to the room, only then did she shed her cloak. She stood for a short time before the hearth holding her hands out to the heat of the flames, then rubbing her arms. Once warm, she got busy searching for the crushed leaves that she could brew and drink that would prevent her from conceiving a bairn.
Elysia searched the various crocks Bliss kept stored with herbs, but couldn’t remember which one held what she needed. Bliss kept the herbs that could cause more harm than good, if not handled properly, separate from the others and those she avoided. She was not skilled enough in their properties to use them. She also wasn’t sure if it was a blend of two herbs Bliss used.
Finally, she found a crock, the scent and look familiar to her. She believed Bliss mentioned something about the wild carrot family as she referred to it. Satisfied with her find, she set to making a brew.
A knock sounded at the door and she was surprised to see Moray there a cloth wrapped around his hand.
“I am glad you’re here, Elysia. I need your help,” Moray said.
“Come and sit,” she said, standing back for him to enter.
Moray sat at the table and rested his wrapped hand on it. He loosened the cloth to expose a wound that ran along the side of one of his fingers.
Elysia was glad to see the bleeding had all but stopped, the cloth soaked with it. “It is good the bleeding has nearly stopped. I’ll fix a yarrow paste to put on the wound and wrap it. That should heal it nicely for you, though you need to keep watch on it.”
“I am glad to hear that,” Moray said, looking relieved.
“You are always so careful when making your bow and arrows. What happened?” she asked while gathering the items she needed.
“You have not heard?” Moray asked and shook his head. “No, you probably didn’t since the news has barely been made known. “We’ve all been aware that the Clan MacBridan has been having difficulty with another clan. Lord Fergus, leader of the Clan MacBridan, told Chieftain Emory to be ready with his warriors to help him battle if necessary. Word was received that the dispute has worsened and battle may be imminent. Chieftain Emory wants his warriors ready and all men of fighting age as well. Only a few men will be left here to see to the clan’s safety.”
Elysia’s stomach churned, fearful that her husband would go off to fight. “Is there nothing that can prevent it?”
Moray kept his voice low. “Some believe that if his cursed son, Odran, returned, the matter would be settled, since he is so feared. I heard tell he is the fiercest of warriors, killing without thought as he did to his brother. He ran a sword threw him on the battlefield.”
Elysia shivered. How could brother kill brother? She could never do harm to her sisters.
“Perhaps it will settle without battle,” Elysia said hopefully and with a silent prayer.
“Chieftain Emory is sending Bram and Tavish along with him, to see if he can help settle the dispute. He has a smooth tongue and can talk most anyone into anything.”
Having spoken with Bram, she could see him capable of that and offered prayers for his success.
“I hate battle, but I am an archer and have no choice but to go,” Moray confessed.
“You are a useless archer until that wound heals well and that will be at least two weeks if not more. I will tell Chieftain Emory if necessary. You will do him no good otherwise,” Elysia said.
Moray looked relieved. “If necessary, I would appreciate you telling him.”
Elysia saw that dusk was near when she went to the door with Moray. Not sure how long her husband would be, Elysia set supper to cooking. She harvested a batch of kale and wild onion from the garden and set a stew to brew. She drank the brew she made as she prepared bread and left it to cook on the stone kept hot by the fire.
After all was done, she went to the door and looked out to see if her husband was near and saw that night was not far off. She hoped he wouldn’t be gone much longer. After all, it was their wedding day. She moved back inside, thinking how strange the day had been. She had always imagined her sisters at her side when she wed, smiles and laughter—a celebration. There was none of that, and sorrow jabbed at her.
Life was proving to be nothing like she thought it would be.
The door opened and she jumped startled, then calmed when she saw her husband enter. She was reminded of his size every time she watched him enter the cottage. The doorway didn’t seem big enough for him and the thought of coupling with him sent a sudden fright through her.
She hurried to speak and chase the thought from her mind. “Since it was growing dark, I made supper for us. It might be better for us to stay the night here.” Why she suggested that, she didn’t know. Was it that she felt safer being surrounded by other cottages instead of being alone at his croft with no one nearby?
To her surprise and relief, he nodded, agreeing.
After removing his cloak and hanging it on a peg, he pointed to the tankard in front of her, and raised a questioning brow.
“Aye, I’m drinking the brew, since it’s later in the day we should be cautious until tomorrow or the next day.” Why was she relieved and disappointed at her own suggestion?
He nodded and bent to kiss her cheek before taking a seat opposite her.
She stood and began to get supper on the table and as usual she talked with him easily. Though she did all the talking, his gestures or one word responses made it clear that he was clearly listening and participating.
“Moray was here,” —she caught the slight scowl that surfaced though vanished quickly— “He suffered a nasty wound to his finger. He told me about Lord Fergus ordering Chieftain Emory to have his warriors and men ready if needed.”
Saber nodded again, letting her know he heard the same.
She asked the question quickly, fearful of the answer. “Will you be called to join the battle?” She was surprised and somewhat relieved when he shrugged. “You don’t know.”
Again he nodded and pointed to his throat.
“You have no voice. That is needed in battle to call out warnings or even to let loose with the tremendous roar that many warriors sound when entering battle.”
He nodded again.
“You will remain here and protect the clan,” she said as if it had been decided. He shrugged again, but she paid it no mind. Chieftain Emory was proud of his talented warriors and brave men. A man with no voice would be a stain on his warriors. He would not have Saber fight. The thought settled her worries, at least those worries.
She talked here and there as they ate and Saber participated as much as he could. It was no chore sitting there listening to her. He loved watching her. She smiled most of the time and often found humor in her own words, which managed to bring a smile to his face, slight as it was.
After she cleaned away supper, Saber could tell by her hesitant moves that something troubled her.
He knew she wouldn’t be pleased if he spoke, but he had to ask. He stretched his hand out to her. “What bothers you?” She didn’t hesitate to take it and when she did, he pulled her gently to sit on his leg and tuck her against him.
He kissed her softly, then with his voice not going above a whisper, urged, “Tell me.”
Bliss had spoken freely to Annis and Elysia about what marriage entailed between a man and a woman. She had wanted them both prepared as to what to expect. And while it was easy to talk with Bliss and Annis about it, it was not easy for Elysia to talk with her husband. Nor did she know if it was even the proper thing to do. However, it was important she be able to talk freely and honestly with her husband. How else could they trust each other?
Saber waited patiently, but seeing the way she glanced so often to the bed, he had an idea at what worried her.
Not knowing how to approach the matter, she said, “The women say I will have trouble delivering a bairn because of my wee size. That I am too small to push out a bairn.” She hesitated, scrunching her face, then spit it out fast before she could stop herself. “I wonder if you are too big for me.”
He thought that was what worried her. While he was a good size, he’d been with small women before and it never posed a problem.
He shook his head.
“You are not too big for me?” she asked to be certain she understood him.
He nodded.
“How do you know that?”
His brow went up, thinking how he would explain that one.
She seemed to understand. “Oh, you have been with a small woman already.”
He nodded again.
“I suppose that’s good. Did it hurt her?” she asked quite innocently.
He shook his head, thinking of how pleased he had left the woman.
“Was it her first time?”
He shook his head again. He had sought only willing and experienced women for pleasure.
Elysia remained quiet, thinking on all Bliss had told her about being with a man, her experience coming from talking with married women and those who had known men intimately.
He understood her concern, but that she discussed it with him without too much difficulty meant she was comfortable enough with him to do so. She had told him more than once she found it easy talking with him, and this proved it. It also proved that she trusted him and that touched his heart more deeply than he cared to admit.
She smiled ever so softly. “I know you won’t hurt me.”
He was about to say never, but stopped himself. That was something he couldn’t promise her, for he feared a day would come that he wouldn’t be able to keep his word.
He shook his head slowly, hoping she was right.
She looked to the bed and back at him.
“Sleep,” he said and gave a nod to her tankard, reminding her that they would do nothing tonight.
She nodded and she kissed him lightly. “I am glad I can talk freely with you and you don’t think me foolish.”
“Never.” It flew from his mouth without hesitation. This he could say and keep always. Never would he think her foolish.
She chuckled. “Even when I asked you to marry me?”
He kept his voice to a whisper. “Brave.”
“You thought me brave?”
He nodded and smiled softly. “Me foolish.”
She chuckled again, her arms going around the back of his neck. “I’ll agree with that.”
He stood and he carried her to the bed. He wanted so badly to strip her and himself naked and spend the night making love to her, but he couldn’t, no matter how badly he ached to do so. He couldn’t risk having his seed take root.
Saber placed her on her feet by the bed and went to add more logs to the fire for the night. He slipped off his shirt when he was done and his boots, seeing that his wife had removed all but her shift.
She hurried into bed holding the blanket back for him to join her and he did.
Elysia laughed softly as they twisted and turned to settle comfortably. “This bed was a good size for Annis and me, but I fear not for us.” She snuggled against him, quite content wrapped in his arms and pressed solidly against him. His body provided better heat than the blanket and in no time she found her eyes heavy with sleep.
Saber lay taut with tension, fighting the overpowering urge to couple with his wife. He was used to the need for a woman that would creep up on him often enough, but it was just that—a need that a quick poke usually satisfied. This was something different he felt, though he couldn’t explain it nor did he understand it. It wasn’t only that this manhood ached for her, but his heart as well. It was a strange feeling and yet a comforting one.
He forced his eyes shut, but unfortunately couldn’t force himself to sleep. He laid there impatiently waiting for the morn.
