Grand Love by JC Hawke

2

Mase

“He has another kid?”I ask, dumbfounded.

“I looked deeper when I found Jasmine. He wasn’t on her birth certificate, but she carried his name. I was curious as to why.”

“And?” I ask.

“I couldn’t find anything, just the same money trail back to him from the monthly payments. Just like Nina. I don’t think there has ever been contact, at least not in the years I can trace. I looked into his child support payments and found four different accounts, one being Sarah Anderson and Jasmine’s mother Veronica Mayer.”

“Nina has more than one sibling?” I frown.

“Three, and they all get the same standard payment from Jerry’s account.”

“Hush money?” Fucking prick. “I want everything on him. Go deeper.”

“Scott’s already on it,” he confirms, nodding his head at me as I search the sheet of paper for Jasmine’s address.

“What are you doing?” Charlie snaps. “You can’t approach her without speaking to Nina first.”

“The fuck I can’t! She’s the reason I share my child; I don’t give a fuck who she is. I want answers.”

“And if you ever want to get Nina back—which I presume you do, seeing as you’re so hell-bent on finding out who ‘set you up’.”

“I don’t want Nina back.”

He ignores me, carrying on. “Then do you not think you should speak to her first, find out if she wants this dug up? This doesn’t just affect you, Lowell.”

“Charlie’s right, Mason,” Vinny agrees.

My face screws up in annoyance. “When did you pricks turn so soft? This woman fucked me over. I don’t owe a damn thing to anyone.”

“No, but you have a child now, mate, and we don’t need another Marcus,” Charlie states.

“I’m not going to fucking kill her, Charles! Jesus Christ! I just want to know who paid her.” And take the bastard down. “Give me the address.”

“I’ll come with you,” Charlie tells me.

“You sure? I don’t want my hotshot lawyer having to cover my ass.” I shake my head and snatch up the file from the desk, hoping the address will be in there.

He follows me to the door, giving me a shove in the back.

“Mason,” Vinny calls and I turn, already knowing what he is going to say. “Don’t do anything stupid.”

“Yeah,” I huff, slipping out the door.

As fucking if.

* * *

Nina

I’m finishinga feed when the doorbell rings. The click of the lock sounding a couple seconds later. “Joey?” I call out.

“Yeah, just me.” He smiles as he comes into view, looking around the apartment briefly before his eyes come back to me. “Little man sleeping?”

“Yeah, just. Thank you for coming over, saves lugging the pram onto the overground.”

“Anytime. You know that.”

“I can’t believe he’s outgrown it so soon, I didn’t think I’d need to upgrade until he was at least two.”

“The boy sure can eat.” Joey chuckles, pushing his dark hair back from his face. “Want me to get his seat?” he asks, nodding to my full arms.

“Yeah, please. It’s in the cupboard.”

Joey disappears around the corner, and I sit and smile to myself. “We are so lucky, baby boy,” I coo.

“I had four paintings sell this week, all off the wall,” Joey tells me excitedly as he walks back into the room with the car seat.

“That’s incredible, Joey. I told you!” I whisper-shout, smoothing a hand over the soft hair that tickles my chest as I try to move without waking him.

Joey’s photography has really started to take off. He has one year left at university and his placement has already offered him a job at the gallery when he finishes.

“Yeah, you did.” He grins, placing the seat on the sofa. “Where’s the bag?”

“In my room, can you grab it?”

“Sure thing.” He heads off in the direction of the bedroom, and I smile. At first, I found him intrusive, borderline too much, and it is probably why I pushed him away when I first met him. But once you get to know Joey, you see that he only cares. Joey gives a shit. And you can’t hate someone for caring too much.

“Here, I picked up the blue bunny too. Just in case. That everything?”

“Yep, think so.”

* * *

After findinga stroller in the first shop we went into, we decided to grab some lunch. Joey hasn’t got much of a budget after his bills, so we settle for The Elm, both of us ordering a sandwich.

“How’s your assignment coming along? Did you get the shots you wanted over the weekend?”

“Yeah, I did, actually. Thank you for the inspiration.”

“Of course, any way I can help!” I smile, glad I could do something for him for a change.

“Did you get the email I sent last night? The studio listing.”

My face drops and I lean in, fiddling with the blankets that drape over the car seat. If anyone has pushed my dancing (or lack of) since I stopped, it’s Joey.

“Nina, you’ll do what you want, I know that, but you should at least go look. It’s cheap as chips on rent.” He pauses, not wanting to annoy me with what comes out of his mouth next. “You have the money in the bank.”

I shake my head, sitting back in my seat and crossing my arms over my chest. He’s referring to the money Mason gives me, which I don’t see as my own. Yes, I use a small percentage of the monthly payments for living expenses, but the rest is set aside for our son. It’s not my money, and I don’t want it. “Where would I find the time, Joe? I have a baby and I work now.”

He gives me a look, tilting his head to the side, looking all boyish. “Come on, you suck at your job.” He laughs.

“Piss off,” I hiss quietly. “It pays the bills.”

“So would your dancing,” he tells me over the rim of his coffee cup. “You forget I’ve seen you dance. You’re good.”

“Have you heard from your brother?” I throw at him, getting more personal than I should.

“That’s a low blow.” He rolls his eyes, letting out a breath.

“Keep your nose out then.”

He glares at me, his eyes pinched tight as he says, “Christmas.”

“What?”

“I’m going home to see Jasper at Christmas. He wants to know more about Mum, and I know I need to face my shit and sort my life out.” He pops a brow and I roll my eyes.

“Touché, asshole.”

“I can come with you. If you decide to have a look,” he says, referring to the studio.

“I’ll think about it.”

He smirks at me. “Good.”

“Do you know what you’re going to say to Jasper?” I ask, giving him a pitiful look.

“Nope. He wants to know more about Mum. His therapist thinks it would help.” He runs his tongue over the front of his teeth. “I think being the oldest and having to take care of her, deal with the medicines and hospital crap, it made me desensitised to it all by the time it took her. He only remembers a screaming woman; he’s older now and needs the closure.”

Joey’s mum suffered from the same mental illness as Joey does. Schizophrenia. Unfortunately, when Joey was only young, she took her own life. It isn’t something he speaks about often, but when he does open up, I know I have to be careful with what I say.

“That makes sense.” I give him a sad smile. “She would be proud of you, from what you have told me. That I’m certain of.”

He throws his head back, laughing, but I sense it’s not sincere. I know going home will be tough. I feel bad for even bringing his brother up. “You’re too nice, Nina.” He continues to laugh. “Oh, to have your innocence.”

“What?” I frown, shaking my head as a smile tugs at my lip.

“Nothing.” He shakes his head, draining the rest of his coffee. “Come on, let’s get you two home.”

* * *

The girls are spreadaround my lounge when I finish putting the little man to bed. One thing I have always stuck to is a bedtime routine. Bath, bottle, book, and bed.

“Please tell me you’ve ordered already!” I tell them, rubbing my stomach as it grumbles.

“It’s on the way.” Scarlet smiles.

“Thank God, I barely ate today. What was so funny just now? I was halfway out the door and you idiots woke him up.”

“Luce went official,” Megan tells me, waggling her brows at Lucy across the room.

“Really?!”

“No! Well, yes. I need to speak to him. The conversation was all kinds of fucked up.” She holds a hand up, shaking her head.

“In what way?”

“He—” The girls both burst out laughing. “He wanted to go bareback. I said I don’t do that with people I’m not in a relationship with and he just asked me, right there and then as he hovered at my…” She gestures down there.

“And you said yes?”

“What would it have looked like if I said no? I’d look like a slut.”

Lucy doesn’t do casual dating, or she didn’t. Something changed last year and honestly, I think it’s for the best. Her ‘relationships’ (with complete assholes like Hugh) used to kill her for weeks before, she was always too emotionally invested and always too willing to give ‘one more chance’.

“Lucy, it doesn’t make you a slut. It’s very normal to have sex and not be in a relationship. And if you want to use protection, you should.”

“We did.” She nods, tight-lipped. “I told him I had a friend who got knocked up after the first time and she was on the pill.” She raises her brows as she sips her wine.

“Corrr, what a whore bag,” Megan jokes.

I launch a pillow at her head. “Fuck off.”

“What about you, little miss innocent over there. Is Dr Hottie still fucking with you?” I eye Scarlet knowing her silence is to keep the talk off of her. We haven’t discussed anything but her for the past couple ‘girls’ nights’. She started her medical degree at the end of last year and met a very, very handsome surgeon. Shame he is also very married.

“Ugh, don’t. Nothing has changed over here. Apart from my panties, I tend to take a couple pairs for the day now.”

“Oh, wow.” I chuckle.

“I don’t get it.” She shrugs. “The guy is a jerk, if he was my husband I’d be pissed.”

“Has he made a move?” Lucy sits forward.

“No! God, I’ve made it very clear I’d never go there with a married man. He’s just… intense, the way he looks at me.”

Lucy cringes. “Slimeball.”

“Hottest slimeball I’ve ever seen,” Megan adds.

“What are we all like, in our prime and none of us can find a man,” I tut.

“Umm, I’m more than happy on my own, thanks,” Scarlet scoffs.

“I don’t know how you live out at the house by yourself, Scar. The place gives me the creeps.” Lucy shivers. “Anyway, I’m taken. Happily fucking. Condom and all.” We chuckle.

“I have everything, bar the man,” I groan.

“You could have the man too… Sorry. Just saying,” Scarlet says on a shrug.

“That ship sailed, Scar, as much as I love your enthusiasm.” I smile over at her. She took it hard when me and Mason split up. Luckily, I didn’t lose her as a friend. “I actually wanted your opinion.” I shuffle up the sofa and bring my legs up under me. “I think I’m going to let Mason come here to drop off and pick up. I’m hoping it will make things smoother. For everyone.”

“What?” Luce mutters.

“Bad idea?” I wince.

“Not at all,” she says. “Just surprising. It’s been a while.”

“Yeah, I can’t even imagine what it would be like to see him again. It scares me a little,” I tell them.

“As long as you don’t kill him,” Megan says, giving me a soft wink.

“I just feel like it will rip open the wound all over again, making myself vulnerable when I’m only now finding my feet.”

They go quiet, all lost in thought. It’s been a crazy year for us all. They have been there for me every step of the way and I know it hasn’t always been easy. In fact, it’s been a nightmare at times. Juggling full-time jobs and then dealing with me and my issues after dark.

“I can’t rely on you guys forever.” I sip my wine.

“Yeah, you can.” Lucy gives me a reassuring look, one that leaves no room for question. “But I do think this is the next step and the right one.”

“Do you ever wonder about him? Like…” Scarlet looks at me, trying to think of the right words.

I give her a tight smile. “All the time, Scar.”

All the damn time.

* * *

Mase

I putthe Bentley into park and stare up through the windscreen at the tower flats in front of me. Clothes hang from the balconies, along with flags and football shirts. The place is a dive. “She lives here?” I ask Charlie as he continues to read the file.

“You need to read this before you go barrelling in there, Mase. She has kids.”

“What?” I frown, flicking my eyes to the paperwork. “How many?”

“Two. Both in care.” He shakes his head as he reads. “She was arrested for being in possession of class A drugs. You need to get more details before you do this. Come back another time.”

“When was this?” Who the fuck is this girl?

When he doesn’t answer, I throw open my door. “Lowell, just give me a fucking second,” he snaps.

I climb from the car and button my suit jacket, lifting my eyes to find two men standing on a balcony three floors up. Cigarette smoke rises between them as their eyes find focus on me. I nod my head to them and round the car.

“You coming, princess?” I ask through Charlie’s window.

He climbs from the car and removes his tie and jacket, then runs his hand through his hair, messing up his styled waves. “Let me do the talking.”

“Fuck off.”

“Trust me. Let me do the talking,” he warns, walking past me and into the building’s entrance.

The cold concrete floor is littered with bottles and plastic waste, haphazardly swept off to the sides to create a walkway. The walls have a musty smell, mould lining the cold concrete. The place is filthy.

We take the stairs to the ninth floor and come to a stop outside flat 36. I stand to the left of the door whilst Charlie steps up and knocks.

“She might be at work,” he tells me when she doesn’t answer after a minute, but I give him a look that says, ‘at this time of day’.

She’s probably sleeping off last night’s shift.

The door rattles then opens. “Who are you?” she asks in a strong east London accent.

I can’t see her from my concealed spot, but I can see Charlie, and his reaction has me craning my neck around the door to get a look at her.

Her eyes are scanning Charlie up and down as she pulls on the hem of her jumper. Her eyes meet mine and realisation quickly sets in.

“You,” she panics.

“Lowell!” Charlie warns as I wedge myself between the door and the doorframe, stopping her from shutting it.

I look up and into her face, only inches away from my own.

Those eyes.

I’d remember them anywhere. They still haunt me in my dreams.

She has bleached hair, which throws me off, because if it was dark, you’d think she was the girl I fell in love with once upon a time.

This is Nina’s sister alright.

“Get out or I’ll call the police,” she yells, her voice shaking.

“Good idea. Although, I’d open a couple windows first.”

She scoffs. “No one ever got arrested for smoking a bit of weed, rich boy,” she taunts, stepping back. And I get the sense her words lack the confidence she probably intended.

“No, maybe not, but my friend here. He is one of the best lawyers in the city. I’ve seen the pull he has in a court of law.”

“You don’t scare me,” she says, flicking her eyes to Charlie.

My hand snaps out, grasping her jaw tight enough to show I’m serious but loose enough to not leave a mark. “Who paid you?”

“What? Get off me.” She struggles, trying to snatch her head away from my grip.

“You’ll fucking tell me! You—”

“Lowell!” Charlie steps between us as she pushes my hand from her face. “You were paid to pose in photos with this man, yes?” he asks.

I put my hands on my hips as my nostrils flare.

“I want you to leave.” She looks at the clock on the wall. “You need to leave.”

“Not until you tell me who paid you!” I snap, completely losing my cool.

“Lowell,” Charlie repeats.

“We leave now, and she’ll never let us through the door again!” I turn back to face her. “Tell me!”

“I don’t know, okay? I just did what I was told to do.”

I can feel my face heating as I step towards her. I go to run my hand through my hair, and she flinches, making me pause and question why.

I tilt my head, glaring as I search her bloodshot eyes.

She walks to the window and peeks out, her hand shaking on the curtain. “You need to leave. Please!”

“Are you safe here, Jasmine?” Charlie asks, picking up on the same feeling I am.

She frowns, smoothing the yellow strands of hair behind her ears. “Yes. Who the hell do you think you are?”

“You need to tell me who paid you! I won’t hesitate to have you arrested and thrown in prison.”

Threatening her is probably the last thing I should be doing right now.

“What for?” She frowns.

I can see Charlie’s eyes burning into the side of my head, but I don’t face him. “For being a fucking whore!” I yell, the last of my control clearly gone.

She frowns, shrinking back, her face awash with sorrow.

This woman isn’t a prostitute.

She hasn’t got it in her.

“What’s that noise?” Charlie asks, but I can hear nothing past the drumming in my chest.

She’s not going to tell me.

She doesn’t know.

Jasmine’s eyes dart to the door between the kitchen and the sofa, and I still as the noise registers.

“Is that—”

Stepping forward, I push open the door with the palm of my hand, which gives me the perfect view of the room behind it.

The blood that was boiling on the surface of my skin seems to drain from my body, leaving me staring wide-eyed at the baby standing up in the cot.

Jasmine moves quickly, bending and scooping the little girl up in her arms, clinging on tight.

She didn’t want us to see this.

Shit.

“What the fu—”

“Lowell, shut up,” Charlie warns, his voice noticeably softer. “You have two boys, both in care?” he asks Jasmine, taking a step towards her.

Her eyes close and when they open tears brim them.

“Not from my doing. I’m getting them back.”

“I’ve read your file, Jasmine, please don’t lie,” Charlie states.

“I’m not lying. I took the blame, but it wasn’t me.”

I snort, making Charlie turn. He pins me with a glare. “And this little one. She’s yours?”

“Yes.” A tear runs down her cheek and I turn, running my hands through my hair. I don’t want to feel sorry for this girl—she ruined my life.

“You have no record for this baby. Why?” I ask.

“She’d be taken away; I can’t lose any more of my babies, I can’t,” she cries.

“Fuck!”

“Lowell!”

I walk to the kitchen, shaking my head as I take in the baby bottles amongst the dishes. How didn’t I notice them before?

My eyes catch something in the sink, and I lean over to get a better look.

A used syringe lies in the bottom of the sink.

I see red.

“Show me your arms,” I demand, taking quick strides to her.

Lifting her arm, I search for track marks but don’t find any, just bruises on her bicep. Four fingers and a thumb wrap around her small muscle in a purple and black marking.

I close my eyes, running my tongue over my teeth, my head fucked.

What now?

How do I leave her here? How do I leave a baby here?

This woman wrecked everything.

She’s Nina’s sister.

Nina.

“You’re coming with us,” Charlie tells her. “Pack a bag.”

I let out the breath I was holding, opening my eyes when her words come out in a rush.

“What?!” she panics. “No, I’m not! I can’t.”

“Pack a bag,” I grit out, watching as she grips her daughter tighter.

She swallows thickly, looking at the window and back to us.

She wants to leave.

“What are you afraid of?” I finally ask her, trying to smooth my tone.

“He will follow me,” she admits, her voice barely audible.

Charlie looks at me, and I nod in understanding. She’s a victim, as we thought. “He won’t find you.” I frown, wondering what the hell I’m doing.

“I can’t.” She shakes her head.

“But you want to?” Charlie asks.

She shakes her head, but tears fall and then she shrugs. “I’m…”

“Pack a bag. Before I change my mind.”

* * *

She’s jumpy,looking around us as we load the car. The street is quiet, but a few people are watching from their balconies in curiosity. It’s a bad idea—terrible even, and I have no plan to speak of, but I know I can’t leave her here. A child. A baby. I can’t leave a minor in this hellhole; Charlie couldn’t either.

“Has she had her injections, health checks?” I ask, looking at her through the rearview mirror once in the car.

She nods her head, not meeting my eyes. “My friend is a midwife. She helped me deliver.”

Charlie scrubs at his face, his frustration starting to creep into his calm façade. He already knows this is now damage control, especially if she had help.

“Do you have a child?” she asks, her voice shaking.

“Why?”

She looks anywhere but at me. “The baby seat, I just presumed.”

Everything becomes real in that moment.

What the fuck am I doing?

This woman fucked me over and I’ve just pulled her from her home.

* * *

“You’re goingto hand Betty over to the authorities.”

She stands from her spot on my sofa and starts rushing to grab all her things, Betty grasped tight in her arms. “No way. She can’t be without me.”

“Charlie’s looked into every other option. There’s no way they’d let you keep her in your current situation.”

“Bullshit!” she spits out, panic washing over her pale face. “You can’t take her. Please. I’m sorry,” she cries.

“This isn’t about what you did, Jasmine. You said you wanted to get your children back. This is the first step if you want to get them back for good.”

“No. I can do it myself. I don’t need your help.”

“We both know that’s not true. Not like this.” I gesture towards Betty, feeling like the worst person in the world. I don’t want to take them away from each other, but this really is the only option.

“Fuck you!” she snaps, getting worked up, tears streaming down her face.

“Jasmine, you need to listen to Mason. I know this is hard, but it’s an opportunity for you to get better and back on your feet. He’s offering you something not many would, given the circumstances.”

She looks at me, swallowing thickly, then shakes her head no.

“I will put you up and give you a job. Keep your head down and stay away from the shit littered in your apartment—”

“That wasn’t mine.”

“And you will get your children back. All of them.”

She thinks on it, and I see the moment she gives in, her lip trembling as she bounces Betty in her arms, her chin resting on her head as she looks to the ceiling. “What do you gain from all of this?” she croaks.

Me? Nothing.

Nina? Eventually… a sister.