Catherinelle by Diane Portman-Ray

 

 

11

 

The moment we stepped into the tent, Hugo took off the other way like we didn’t even know each other. No one could have guessed he had stuck his tongue down my throat seconds before. It was weird to see him walk away and put distance between us after being glued to one another for twenty-four hours. Suddenly, I felt colder than I was in the winter air.

Freddy had gone out of his way to celebrate his daughter’s birthday. The white tent was fit for the party of a king, covering almost the entire lawn. From the ceiling there were strings of flowers and crystal chandeliers hanging, spreading a soft light that was dim and made the place look intimate. On the far end there was a wood stage, not very tall, where a jazz band was killing it. The woman who had the mic was dressed in a tight black suit, had her raven hair hanging all the way to her waist and scarlet red lipstick. She was just starting her own version of Mambo Italiano. Everyone turned to her when she hit the first notes. Wow, she was good. She was very, very good. Her voice sounded like all her diet was whiskey and cigars. I heard the torment in her voice when she sang about the girl going back to Napoli, and the verse made me smile involuntarily, remembering my summers in Napoli when I was little. Then the song picked up its pace, and she attacked every note just like Rosmary Clooney, and people started gathering in front of the stage to show their skill.

I saw Vincenzo spinning Lola around, feeling the song, and I waved at them when their eyes found me. Hugo had already got lost in the crowd the guests, probably finding Roman, and I knew there wouldn’t be any chance to spend time with him until we were back to the house.

Caroline appeared in front of me in a beautiful red dress, Jessica Rabbit style, with Gianna in her arms. The baby had the cutest outfit on, same color as her mother and a poppy on her head.

“Cat, you made it!” Caroline gave me the warmest smile and pulled me in for a one-armed hug.

“I’m sorry if I was late. Hugo took forever to get ready.” Not true, we had stopped to suck on each other’s faces. “He’s pampered like a woman.”

“I saw him just now. Well, it was worth the time. He is dashing tonight.”

He was more than just dashing. If I was a weaker woman, I would have swooned at the view of his ass in those pants.

“And look at you, baby girl!” I took the Gianna in my arms and kissed her chubby cheeks. She still had that distinct baby smell, and I wanted take it all in. “You’re one today, Gianna. Soon you’ll break hearts left and right, and your daddy will have to carry a bigger gun.”

Freddy’s laugh boomed from behind me.

“Don’t remind me, Catherinelle. I’m already turning gray just thinking about it. I don’t know how Gino does it with you.”

“He assigned King Kong to watch me.”

“Oh, I heard. Who can blame him? Look at you, you’re a…” He took me in from head to toe. “you’re a woman. When did that happen? I remember when your mom was trying to send you to nap, and you used to hide under the tables. It seems like yesterday, like the blink of an eye.”

“Then don’t blink, Freddy, because it will be the same with this one.” I kissed the baby again. She was just too sweet. “Hey, guys, Gino is really sorry he wasn’t able to make it. You know how much he loves this little lady, but Muse wasn’t well. She needed to disconnect from New York for a while.”

The loss that Muse suffered wasn’t a secret for anyone, and I knew they understood. To lose family was the worst curse, and if the Nuccis didn’t get it, no one did. Even if Freddy had a problem with Gino’s absence, he wouldn’t dare to say a fucking thing about it. You didn’t want to rub the boss the wrong way; it might cost you an arm and a leg. Literally.

“He already sent a fifty-year-old scotch to apologize, but I told him before there is no problem. He needs to take care of his woman. Is there talk about a wedding yet?”

“He’s ready to make an honest woman out of her.” I smiled from my heart. “But we don’t want the wedding to be marked by grief, so he decided to hold it off until she’s back on her feet.”

“Understandable. Caroline, Aunt Althea wants to see Gianna again. Why don’t I take her while you show Catherinelle to her table?”

“Sure, my love.”

I gave Freddy the baby, and he kissed me on my forehead on his way to find his aunt. Caroline and I walked arm in arm, stopping from time to time to say hello and chat with people. Everywhere around, I could hear glasses clinking, champagne bottles being popped and laughter. In the end, we made it to the table where my mom was seated along with her sister and a few other friends of hers.

“Simona, I brought your baby.”

Caroline took me to my mom like she was giving me away, and I leaned down to kiss her on the cheek.

“Hey, mom.”

“Hello, sweetheart. It took you some time to get here.”

“Sorry for the wait, ma.”

“Let me see you, honey.” She got up and pushed me away, taking me in. “You are so beautiful, my girl, but this dress shows a lot. You don’t have to prove to anyone you have legs, honey; we believe you.”

“Mom!” I cried and let my shoulders fall. “Don’t start with me.”

“I’m just saying. Say hello to everyone.”

And I did. I went around the table to kiss Carla, third wife to my mom’s cousin, Christopher; then Betty, the widow of my dad’s best friend; Gina and her sister, Rosey, they were mistresses to some of our family friends and Patty who was talking with my mother’s sister, Diana. All the ladies were dressed like we were attending the Met Gala, with expensive glamorous dresses and their wrists and necks covered in gold and gemstones.

“Patty, where’s B?”

“Ah, she was right here a few minutes ago. You know what, I have to find my husband. If I see Bianca, I’ll tell her to find you.”

“Thank you,” I said and turned to my aunt. “Diana, I haven’t seen you in months.”

“I know, baby, I know, but I was at this retreat in Bali. You have to go there, Cat, it’s gorgeous. Tell me, how are you?”

Crazy for my guard, fantasizing about him day and night.

“Ah, you know, school is keeping me busy. It’s my senior year.”

“Pff, school.” She waved the subject away. “Tell me about boys. Is there anyone you have your eye on?”

YES!

“No, auntie. Jesus, you’re still relentless.”

“We can fix that tonight. I’ve seen Freddy has some guests from Atlantic City. They have some casinos together, and they came with some hunky, good looking young man. They had some big bulges in their pants.”

“Diana!” I laughed and slapped her shoulder playfully, grateful that my mom wasn’t listening. They were sisters but very different people.

“I’m just sayin’. If you don’t jump on them, I will.”

“Be my guest.” I already had my eye on someone.

Lola came to the table too, and we started chatting about hair and makeup, about some annoying clients she had at the salon this week. Lola was a hairdresser herself before marrying my cousin and opening her own place. Now she was the boss, but what I liked the most about her was that she was easy to talk to and always knew everything about everyone. She liked to say it was the hairdresser in her that pushed her to gossip.

“Oh, my God!” she said mid-sentence and grabbed my arm. “I love this song. I have to find Cenzo so he can dance with me.” She jumped up and went to hunt down her husband.

The singer was gone, and now the orchestra was making smooth sounds. I recognized the song immediately; it was La Bella Malinconica. I watched La Dolce Vita a million times, so of course, I knew the soundtrack by heart.

When I looked around the table, I discovered almost everyone had gone out on the dancefloor to enjoy the song. My mom was dancing with Freddy and Aunt Di with Roman. It was just me and the mistresses left. I liked the song too, and I wanted to dance to it. On my left I saw my cousin, Marco, and right across the tent, Hugo was drinking with Vito. My first thought was to ask Marco to dance with me because I knew he couldn’t tell me no, but my legs made a decision on their own and took me to Hugo’s table.

“Hey, Cat.”

“Hey, Vito. When did you get here?”

“Just now. I haven’t even seen the birthday girl yet.” Perfect.

“Caroline just took her to the house, go find them.”

He nodded and went to look for Gianna so I took his place next to Hugo.

“What is it?” he asked and shot the whiskey down his throat. “Why did you want to get rid of Vito?”

“To talk to you.”

“Not here, Cat.”

“Dance with me.”

“No.” His answer came like a reflex.

“But everyone is dancing.” I pouted. “Come on, we’re friends, right? Friends can dance.”

“Catherinelle, no.”

“Roman is dancing with my Aunt Diana. No one believes he’s fucking her.” There was a strong possibility Diana wanted it though. I put a hand on his knee, and his eyes shot up to look at me. “I want to dance.”

“I don’t dance.”

“Oh, come on, it’s just slow dancing. All you have to do is move from one leg to another.” I tilted my chin to the dancefloor where everybody was doing so, but Hugo didn’t budge. He just sat there, looked away and ignored me. “Ok, I’ll go back to my seat.”

I was very disappointed because I really wanted to dance, but he wasn’t having it, so I returned defeated to the table. Even one of the mistresses was on the dancefloor now, with her lover, which was surprising since I saw his wife a few minutes ago, but she was probably blacked out drunk by now. I poured myself a glass of Rose and sat there looking straight into it until a shadow fell over me. I was surprised to look up and find Hugo towering over me.

“Come on,” he ordered.

“Where?”

He extended his hand, waiting for mine.

“Will you dance with me?”

I wanted to say yes, but my mouth was hanging open, so I just took his hand and let him steer me to the middle of the floor. One of his hands went to my waist, and we started moving slowly.

“Why the change of heart, Mustafa?”

“I saw you pouting alone. I didn’t want to upset you, Cat, but this is fucking torture.”

“The dancing?”

“No. I have to look at you like I don’t want to fuck you. I have to keep my hand from sliding down on your ass. You’re dressed like a fucking wet dream, and you’re asking me to touch you like I don’t know what’s underneath.”

Well, damn. I bit my lip and looked down, blushing. I was the object of his desire, and it made me feel special. It was me. No other woman here. Me.

“It’s the same for me,” I spoke, and he frowned. “I want to climb you like a tree. Don’t tell me how wrong that is. I know it.”

He wanted to say something else, but Lola’s high-pitched voice stopped him.

“You two are so cute!” she said while she was dancing next to us. “Hugo, I can’t believe she made you dance. I’ve never seen you dance. Look how cute they are, baby.”

Vincenzo was smiling from ear to ear like the Cheshire cat.

“The Albanian Monster knows how to move his legs. That will bring fear to his enemies.” He mocked Hugo, who looked at him with a ‘Fuck You’ in his eyes.

“Just keep moving, Nucci. I think you’re falling behind the music. Lola, you should find someone better to dance with.”

“Hey,” Cenzo cut in, “take care of the woman in your arms.” Then he turned away with his wife and spun past us.

My chest exploded. In that moment, it was like we were a couple surrounded by friends and family. For a brief second, the barrier between fantasy and reality faded, and the sensation was so good, it scared me. I wanted this more than all those crazy orgasms he gave me.

I wanted to put my arms around his neck and let my head fell on his chest, but I knew that was impossible. The prying eyes would spot the intimacy between us, and then the gates of hell would open. So I kept my hands right where they were, and I looked up at him.

“Thank you,” I said into his ear so he could hear me over the music.

“You’re welcome, princess. Are you enjoying the dance?”

“I am, more than ever. Who said you can’t dance?”

“I can’t. I’m just moving from a leg to another.”

I let my head fall back and laughed. I loved these stolen moments when he was acting like an actual person, not a Sasquatch on steroids.

“Here, let me show you.”

I took the lead and spun us around, and he followed with stiff and clumsy moves, but I could see he was having fun too.

“Cat, stop embarrassing me.” Luckily for him, the song ended. Too bad, I was about to show him a twirl where I would have ended up with my leg on his hip. “Let me take you back to your seat.”

“Hugo Mustafa, are you acting…” I put a hand on my chest mimicking shock, “…like a gentleman?”

“I told you, anything for you, princess.”

My mother was already at the table when we arrived there, and she gave Hugo a quick hug.

“Hugo, darling, I’m sorry if she harassed you tonight.”

“She’s a handful, Simona, but it’s part of the job.” Ouch! “Ladies, I’ll leave you to it and go back to find Roman. He promised me some fun tonight.”

He turned and walked away while I gaped at his back. Roman promised him some fun? He’d better not be talking about that concierge Roman mentioned.

“Catherinelle, honey, I’m glad to see you and Hugo finally getting along. You know your brother only wants you to be safe out there.” The tips of mom’s fingers were touching my chin.

“My brother wants to suck all the fun out of my senior year, and no, mom, I don’t get along with him. I couldn’t bring a date because of him so he had to dance with me.”

“You wanted to bring a date? Is there a boy you like, honey?”

Yeah, and he’s the one hunting the nightmares of many men in New York City.

“It doesn’t matter because Hugo used him to break a table.”

Before mom got a chance to drill me for more information, Patty, Bianca and Lola came to the table together laughing about something.

B came straight to me and pulled me into a hug to whisper in my ear.

“I’ve seen you dancing. You owe me some details.”

“Shh!”

We all sat back to the table, and the gossip picked up right where we left it. Patty was just about to tell us a rumor about my Uncle Pepe that she heard from Vito’s mother, when a shrill and heartless laughter flew above our heads. It was a very distinct sound, almost like a cat being dragged on a nailbed. None of us had to turn around to know exactly who that was.

“Oh, crap,” I said and rolled my eyes. “Weren’t they supposed to be in Barbados until Christmas? Mom, you said she wasn’t coming.”

“The last time I saw her, she said they’d be out of the country for at least a month,” my mother said in her defense.

Patty jumped in to clear things up.

“Nah, they came back to New York last weekend because apparently there was a drop off or something like that, and her husband was needed to pull some strings.”

Victoria Tori was the most obnoxious woman on the surface of planet Earth. She always talked too loudly, dressed to skimpily and smoked too much. Leon Tori, her husband, was well into his eighties, and unfortunately, he was a close family friend, so there was no getting rid of her. Mr. Tori had been associated with the Nucci family ever since my grandfather was running it, and he’d been a very important friend. Half his life was spent in the justice system, and it was never a bad idea to have a friend amongst your enemies. His first two wives died young, and that was how he ended up marrying Victoria twenty years ago. No one knew exactly what she did before that; the official story was that she was a cocktail waitress in Vegas, but Ignazio swore he remembered her being a call girl in Long Island. To use her words, she was a fun-loving woman with an older husband who couldn’t keep up with her. To use mine, she was a slutty cougar who fucked her way through the family. She slept with all her husband’s friends; there had been whispers about her and my father, even about her and Gino and Roman when they were teenagers. Young boys didn’t have to go too far to find a quick bit of fun; they just had to find Victoria Tori. Naturally, no one fucking liked her, and every time she was around, she upset my mother.

The moment Victoria eyed our table, she abandoned the man who was making her laugh and came our way. Great.

“Hello, hello, ladies. Oh, how gorgeous you all look tonight. Simona!” she screamed in her specific high-pitched tone that disturbed dogs. “You look so good. Honey, I don’t know what you did all these years, but you haven’t aged a day. This widow thing really works for you. I’m so jealous.”

She was such a bitch.

My mother smiled politely and raised her wine glass in Victoria’s direction.

“Thank you, Victoria. How was your trip?”

“Too damn short. Leon promised me a month in paradise, and I only got a few days. How is that fair? Oh, Catherinelle, you look lovely. How are you, still no boyfriend?”

I was starting to get sick of this question.

“Nope.” My answer was very hostile in hopes of making her move along the line, and I saw Bianca smiling on the other side of the table.

“Simona, dear, you should do something with this girl. She needs a man.” I have one, thank you very much. “If you would have been my daughter, I would have made sure you knew all the tricks by now.”

“I’ll be sure to come and find you if I have any questions.” Which will be when the pigs fly. “Bianca, can you please come with me to the bathroom? I need some help with my dress.”

“Sure.” Her answer came right away, and we linked arms while walking away.

“Looks like Victoria has a high interest in your love life, Cat.”

“I’m sure she wants me to date someone so she could hop in and try to seduce him.”

When we stepped out, I wanted to take the path back to the house, but Bianca dragged me to the side and around the tent.

“What are you doing, B? The bathroom is the other way.”

“We’re not going to the bathroom.” She opened her clutch and popped a blunt out of it. “We are getting in party mode.”

I stepped back to look at her with a perplexed look.

“B, that’s weed.”

“You don’t miss much, do you? It’s not just weed; it’s from my brother’s stash. Prime quality,” she explained while fishing for a lighter and taking the first hit. “Want some?”

“No, thank you.” I got nauseous just being in the same room with Gino when he was smoking his cigars. “Bianca, you shouldn’t do that.”

“You shouldn’t try to seduce your brother’s underboss. I told you, we grow up fast.”

She had a point.

“I’m freezing. It’s fucking winter outside, and we’re in low cut dresses. We’re going to die until you finish that.”

“Oh, just a few smokes, and we can go.” She shrugged. “Now, tell me. Something happened with Hugo?”

A whole fucking lot happened, but my teeth started chattering, and I hugged my body, jumping from one leg to the other trying to stay worm. The air was aggressively cold. I felt like a bunch of needles were stabbing me at the same time.

“We…” I spoke through the chattering, “yeah, something happened.”

“Dolce Dio, tell me!” she hissed at me.

“We had dinner together.”

“Like a date?”

“No, like he had dinner between my legs. We need to go, B. Seriously, I will pass out from the cold.”

“Fine.”

She put the joint out, and I practically dragged her back around the tent. We were almost inside when something else caught my eye across the yard, near the rose bushes Caroline planted around the house.

“What the hell?” I said to no one in particular.

Bianca stopped too, and when she looked in the same direction, she gasped.

Hugo was leaning against a marble statue of a woman dancing, with a lit cigarette between his lips and one hand in his pocket. The blonde head in front of him belonged to the one and only Victoria Tori who leaned over just enough to make sure he had a clear view of the fake boobs that were spilling out of her dress. I didn’t know why they out there or what were they talking about, but suddenly, the air wasn’t cold anymore. More so, a noxious heat spread all over me.

Hugo said something, and Victoria giggled, taking a few small steps until her breasts were pressed on him. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out her game.

Hugo’s free hand moved from his pocket to her hip, and my vision went black. He had to be joking. After all that drama, the tantrum he threw after I told Roman I loved him, and he goes behind my back to cuddle with the village whore?

“Bianca, go inside,” I told her and started marching towards them.

“Can’t. I’ll stay and watch.”

I turned my head and hissed at her over my shoulder without stopping from walking.

“Go inside.”

When Hugo saw me coming, Victoria was in the middle of tracing the contour of his lips with her boney index finger. That corpse of a husband she had needed to do a better job at keeping his woman on a leash before I sent her to him with her eyes black.

“Excuse me.” My tone was colder than the night.

She turned around, looking startled, to see who spoke.

“Ah, Catherinelle, it’s just you. How can we help you?”

Can we? When the fuck did they become we? I was gone for five fucking minutes.

“Yes, actually, Hugo, my guard, could really help me. I want to leave.”

“Oh, sweety, you need to talk to Caroline to find someone to drive you. Hugo has had quite a few drinks.”

“Did he lose his voice too?” I snapped at her without thinking. “Hugo, let’s go.”

“Victoria, I’ll see you around.” He pushed her to the side, but the wench clutched at his arm.

“Why don’t you come and see me later?” she said with an intoxicating sweetness.

“Jesus, Victoria!” I threw my hands in the air, exasperated. “Go inside. Go find your husband. Hugo, I said let’s go. I have a headache, and I want to go home.”

Astonished by my blow out, Victoria wobbled to the house. I was sure that if I would have been anyone else, I would have got a piece of her venomous mind, but she knew better than to fuck with a Nucci.

“Did you have to do that?” Hugo said when he made sure Victoria was too far away to hear our conversation.

I chose to disregard his dumb question.

“Are you going to see her later?”

He played the same game and didn’t answer, just crooked an eyebrow at me which made me so damn mad, I punched him in the arm. I think it hurt me more than it hurt him though.

“Damn it, Cat. Don’t fucking hit me.”

“You are a jerk. Do you know who I am?”

I looked straight into his eyes like I was trying to burn my way through his heart.

“What?”

“Say my name.”

“Where are you going with this?”

“Say. My. Name.” I spoke slowly, emphasizing every word.

“Catherinelle Nucci.”

Hugo finally started to follow me. When he said my name, the words rolled slowly off his lips. His tone was grave and loaded with all kinds of meanings.

“Say it again.”

“Catherinelle Nucci.”

“That’s right.” I pushed my finger in his chest, and he frowned. He didn’t like it when I did that. “I’m Catherinelle Nucci. I’m a principessa mafiosa. I bear a name that carries respect and tradition.”

“I know.”

“I offered myself to you in a way I did to no one else.” All the bravado in me disappeared, and my voice cracked. “If you want to turn me away just do it, but offer me some respect and say it to my face. Don’t say you’re not willing to touch me because I’m so special then go behind my back with someone like Victoria Tori. I deserve better.”

“Jesus Christ, Catherinelle, I wasn’t going to see her.”

“Really? Because you looked ready to synchronize lips with her when I saw you.”

“We’re…” he looked away from me, “we know each other, ok? Don’t look at me like that. Half of New York has been with that woman. She acts like that with everyone. If we go and look for her right now, I guarantee you she’s glued to someone else.”

“Oh, maybe you’d like to go and meet that woman Roman told you about. The brunette with long hair. The one that’s your type.”

“What are you talking about?”

I turned away from him and ran my hands through my hair. I was losing my mind. I had lost my logic and my reason to this shredding emotion of possession. It seemed like Hugo and I finally found something we had in common.

“I don’t know.” I took a few deep breaths. “I don’t know, Hugo. I blamed you for acting crazy with Roman, and now I’m doing the same thing.”

“Princess,” he murmured the nickname, and I found his eyes that were looking at me with softness. “I’d take you in my arms if I could.” But he couldn’t. He couldn’t because someone could walk out and see us. Damn, I wanted to be in his arms so bad.

“I’m cold. I’m angry…I just wanna go home, Hugo.”

“That can be arranged.”

“No. I wanna go home with you.” I bit my lip. “I feel like some virgin on a stone altar in front of a God who’s refusing the sacrifice. I want you to have me. Why won’t you take me?”

“Catherinelle…”

“Why?”

“Fucking hell, woman, stop fucking torturing me! We talked about this.”

The bitter taste of rejection returned to my mouth.

“Look, Hugo, I’ll go back inside, talk to my mom and then go home. I can’t stay here anymore. I can’t. I feel like my skin is crawling. I can’t keep begging you to sleep with me, Hugo. I’ll just…go to bed on my own.”

He wanted to say something. I saw his lips moving, but I left before giving him the chance. My brain was mush, and I couldn’t take it anymore. I switched to automatic mode and walked robotically to find my mom and tell her I was too sick to stay at the party anymore. Technically not a lie, I was too distressed to stay anymore. Something was happening with me.

I sighed in relief when mom told me she planned to go back to her house to stay with Aunt Diana for the rest of the week. My mother knew me better than anyone, and if I had to act all normal around her, with Hugo a few feet away, she would have seen right through me.

Somehow, I made it to the car Caroline found for me after saying goodbye to everyone, and I threw myself in the backseat, looking out the window the entire drive. When we made it to the beach house, I ran inside like someone was on my heels and didn’t stop until I got into the master bedroom.

I felt suffocated. All of a sudden, I felt bombed with so many emotions, all pouring into me at once. The attraction altered into something so powerful it scared me. I saw Hugo touching Victoria, and I was like a bull with a red cape ready to stab her with my horns. In that moment, I didn’t care where we were or what anyone would say if they heard me. I wouldn’t have cared if Gino had been right there staring in my eyes. In that moment, he wasn’t forbidden or the Monster or my brother’s best friend; he was just mine.

I took my boots off and went to the bathroom to look at myself in the mirror to try and make sense of everything. Why was my heart beating so fast? Why wasn’t the air enough to fill my lungs? Why was I so hollow, longing for him?

Feeling flushed, I pasted my back to the wall and slid down until I was on my ass on the marble floor. The sound of the front door being slammed closed made me flinch, but I didn’t move. I heard Hugo calling my name but stayed silent. With every call, I could hear him getting closer and closer to me until finally, his shadow went through the bathroom doorframe, and he looked down at me.

“You, fucking crazy, beautiful girl.”