Saving Us by Wendy Million

Chapter Forty-Two

We argued on the way to my house. Around in circles we went about what was best for him versus what was best for us as a couple.

“If the pills come out, he’ll get off,” I said again to emphasize my point. “Even if they have enough to charge him, none of this will be as bad for him as it should be.”

We were in my parking lot now, and Sebastian let out a frustrated huff. “My choice is made. I wouldn’t have left you in the first place if you hadn’t told me we couldn’t have a relationship. I never wanted to go, but you said if I was siding with the team, I was siding against you. That’s what you said.”

“That’s how I felt. I thought you’d find out things about the case. You’d overhear, or they’d tell you.”

“And I’d have to keep quiet.”

“Yes,” I said. “If you were keeping your career intact, that’s what you’d have to do. I understood it. I didn’t like it, but I understood.” We sat in silence for a beat. “Sebastian, if Johnny goes to the NFL, if the coach doesn’t get fired—you might never play football again. Even if you think you’re okay with that, I’m not.”

“It’s not gonna come to that.” His voice was firm. “You have the audio of Coach. For Johnny to get off, assuming he’s arrested, he’ll have to roll on Coach. Right?”

I scanned Sebastian’s profile, trying to read him. “Yeah, I think so.”

“We can work this out. One of them will go down. We’ll have to see how everything falls together or falls apart. But I’m not leaving you, Nat. I’m not. I’m done with that.”

“You’re going to persevere the hell out of it?”

“Yeah, I am. There are angles I can work. I’m sure of it.” His intense gaze met mine.

“You should call your parents and talk to them. They understand how hard you’ve worked. You need an objective person.”

He laughed. “My parents aren’t objective. They want what’s best for me, always.”

“Well, then maybe they’ll be able to help you figure out what that is.”

“What’s best for me is you. I know this. No one needs to tell me. I don’t care what they say. I don’t care what you argue. You’re not pushing me away.” He took a deep breath and grabbed my hand. “Unless this is just a way for you to get rid of me.”

“Oh, God. Sebastian. No. I love you. I love you so much. But this could be a life-changing decision. You didn’t do anything wrong, but you might end up paying the biggest price.”

He stared at our two hands, the dark and the light mixing. Linked together, I’d always felt so safe.

“I’ll call them,” he said. “You going in to talk to your dad?”

“Yeah, his car’s in the lot here.” I pointed to where it sat. “You’ll come in after you’re done talking to them?”

For a minute, he didn’t say anything. “I’m serious about this. You need to hear me. I’m not calling them to see whether I should be with you. This is what I’m doing, and that’s what I’m telling them. I’m with you. They can help me sort out my options if things go badly.”

Tears welled up in my eyes, and I stared at the roof of the car, willing them not to fall. “I don’t want you to be hurt by this too.” My voice was thick with unshed tears.

“Come here.” Sebastian used our linked fingers to drag me across him. He pushed my hair back. “It’s you and me, Nattie. We’re doing this. I love you, okay?”

I curled on his lap and buried my face into him, breathing in his scent. My heart raced in my chest, but it wasn’t from anxiety. Being this close brought my body to life. Lights switched on in a dark house. One after another, I became distinctly aware of each part of me responding to his proximity.

When I drew away, he kissed me, long and deep. His hands burrowed into my hair, locking me into place. There was nowhere else I wanted to be except with him, always with him.

* * *

Sitting across from my dad, I stared at the papers strewn on the coffee table. When I glanced up, having told him almost everything, his thoughtfulness startled me. Anger or resignation would have been his normal reactions.

“He’ll get off, right?” I sighed.

“Not sure. You can’t be certain either.” He steepled his fingers. “Look, Natalie. If you want to be in the justice system, then part of that is doing what you’ve done. You dig. Sometimes, what you turn up isn’t what you’d want for your case. This one is personal, so it’s different for us. Normally, I remind myself, when I find something which goes against my case, that my job isn’t to determine guilt or innocence. My role is to get to the truth. I seek the truth.”

“The truth is that he knew those pills would make him violent, and he took them anyway.”

“Unless Johnny comes out and says those words, it’ll be his word against Dawnesha and anyone else who might have known.”

“What about the other girls Dawnesha mentioned?” I asked. “Clay said there were rumors, Dad, about Johnny abusing other women. There must be something there too.”

“Usually smoke means fire, but not always.” He tapped his pen on the table. It was a habit I often found annoying.

A knock sounded on the door. I glanced at my dad, gauging his reaction. “That’ll be Sebastian.”

Dad pursed his lips. “You trust him? He’ll understand a lot about this case if he’s around here now.”

“I trust him. Completely.”

My dad nodded and went to answer the door before I could rise. When the door opened, Sebastian’s startled expression was clear from my position on the couch. He must have expected me.

“Sir—”

“I hear you’re playing for our side now.” My dad offered a small smile.

“I am.” Sebastian nodded.

Dad moved aside to let Sebastian in. The corners of Sebastian’s lips tipped up when he glanced at me. Despite his nap in the SUV earlier, he looked tired.

“What did your parents say?” I asked as he took a seat beside me. I resisted the urge to snuggle into him once he plopped down. Instead, he rested his palm on my leg, and I covered it with mine.

“A lot.” A dark laugh escaped. “We’ll chat about it later, okay?” He sucked in a deep breath. “I called my sister too.”

Scanning his face, I wished my dad wasn’t there. But my dad was in detective mode since he had a cooperative player. Even if he was one who didn’t possess important details.

“What’s your gut instinct on what happened that night?” Dad asked Sebastian without any preamble.

Sebastian raised his eyebrows and shifted. Though he’d told me he was on board, I wondered if his conversation with his family might have changed things a bit.

“I have no proof.” Sebastian met my dad’s gaze.

“I realize that. I’m looking for direction. None of the players are talking. The fact Natalie got Troy to record the coach is a step down the right path.”

Sebastian gave a curt nod. “I’ve got no love for either of these guys. If you say this came from me, that’ll be their defense. But Theo and Jeff were involved. I don’t know how.”

“Why do you think that?” Dad asked.

“Before this, before Annika was beaten, Johnny and I spent a lot of time together. A lot. If I wasn’t with your daughter, sir, I was with him. But ever since that night, he’s been spending his time with Theo and Jeff. The three of them huddle up on the field, in other places, having intense conversations. They’re never joking around.”

My dad would be angry with me, but I had to mention it now. “I saw Theo and Johnny together at the bar the other night.”

Dad froze. “What?” I knew that tone.

I swallowed and glanced at Sebastian. He squeezed my hand in response but didn’t look at me. “Johnny and Theo spoke to me and Claudia at the bar.”

With raised eyebrows, my father said nothing.

“When I brought up what happened to Annika, Theo didn’t answer me.” Wasn’t that what happened? I needed to stop drinking so much.

“Anything else I should be told?” Dad’s voice was steely.

“Um, he might have mentioned I should be careful, and he was angry you wouldn’t leave him alone.”

With a face of thunder, my father rose from his seat. “I’m going to the station.”

“Dad.” I stood with him.

“Don’t Dad me. I’m going to give the police everything we’ve got. I’ll see about executing a search warrant on Theo and Jeff’s places. We’re still missing some of Annika’s things. If one of them isn’t too bright, we might find it.” Grabbing his coat, he paused before opening the front door. “You know, Natalie. You’re an adult. But if someone threatens you, you need to learn to take that seriously. Johnny, whether he goes down for this or not, is dangerous.” With that, he slammed the door behind him.

Sebastian whistled. “I gotta agree with your dad.”

“Don’t.” I held up a hand. “I get it, okay?”

“It’s serious. I’m glad you told me, but I can’t believe you didn’t tell your dad.”

I sighed and closed my eyes, sinking into the couch. “You didn’t grow up with Mr. Overprotective.” Claudia and I hadn’t told him we were going to a bar, and I’m sure I’d get an earful on that later. Then I remembered the conversation Sebastian and I didn’t finish. “Speaking of parents. What happened when you talked to yours and your sister?”

“My sister said she’s seen cases like Johnny’s go either way. Depends on how the pieces slot together, how good the defense attorney is, how prepared the prosecutor is.” He shrugged. “Not overly helpful. My parents…”

“Want you to ditch me and stick with football.”

“Not exactly, no. But they’re worried I’m not being smart, given how uncertain everything is with Johnny’s case and Coach’s involvement.”

“What do you want to do?” Even though I’d been pressing him to reconsider, it wasn’t what I wanted. Being without him for two weeks had torn me apart.

Tipping my chin, he forced me to meet his gaze. “I’m doing it. I’m here.”

For a moment, I stared at him. I didn’t want to push him away anymore. “You should stay here until you leave for the championship game. Your sleep is important. You can’t be well rested living in your car.”

“Your dad—”

“Will understand. I’m an adult.”

“He’ll be fine with me sleeping in your room?”

I laughed. “Uh, no. Probably one of us will have to pretend to sleep on the couch.”

“Ah.” Sebastian kissed my neck and laid me into the couch. “Pretending to sleep sounds like a plan.”

“Don’t you have practice soon,” I said, breathless. Who needed a cardio workout when you had a Sebastian? My phone buzzed in my pocket. “Just a sec.” I pressed on his chest.

Backing off, he sighed. “You’re right, I got practice.”

Taking my phone out of my pocket, I had a text from an unknown number. I punched in my passcode and clicked on the message.

Johnny’s agent was just here. Tried to get me to sign the NDA again. Offered more money this time. Seemed as though they were going after the women he’s screwed. There was a stack of NDAs in his bag.

I stared into space for a moment and then typed. Did you sign it? My heart started racing for a different reason.

Dawnesha’s response was immediate. No. But lots of other people did.

“What’s going on?” Sebastian asked.

“Johnny’s locking down his loose ends.”