Badge by K.L. Savage

 

Idon’t like this at all. It doesn’t feel right to send a pregnant woman on a damn mission. She’s carrying not one, not two, but three of my friend’s kids and if anything happens to her, I’ll be to blame.

I can’t live with that. I would never be able to live day in and day out knowing I would be the cause of Sunnie’s death. Sunnie and her three beautiful children. I can hardly focus on the task at hand. All I can think about is all the what-ifs. Everyone else seems to be focused and we sit in the trucks across the street.

We called for backup too. Ruthless Hellhounds came through for us and Mercy sent One, the guy who apparently only needs one bullet to kill someone. He’s perched at the top of the building across the street too.

His only order is to fire if anything goes wrong. Other than that, it’s going to be Mars who apprehends Haley and Tongue will be the one who takes Mr. Zachary.

Haley will die a quick death. I don’t have the heart to torture her when she’s sick in the head, but Mr. Zachary? His death will not be quick, and it will not be painless.

I’ll make sure of that.

“Are we ready?” Utah asks from the front seat as he types something on his computer. “I need to know if all the mics work. People. Say ‘copy,’” he grumbles.

“Copy.”

“Yepper.”

“Smells right howlin’ in this alley,” Skirt bitches.

I cackle along with everyone else.

“Sunnie, are you ready?” Mars asks her and I can hear the concern in his voice.

“I’m ready. I trust you guys,” she says with a pep in her step. “Oh, after this can we see Slingshot? I’m craving some tacos.”

Utah turns in his seat and gives me a ‘what the fuck’ expression.

“Pregnant women,” I shrug.

“Yeah, Sunshine. I’ll get you whatever you want as long as you’re okay after this,” Mars smiles, doing his best to keep his own worry out of his voice.

“Okay. I want extra pickled onion on mine. Can you just tell him to have them ready? I’m so hungry,” Sunnie whines.

“You just ate,” Mars points out.

“So? I’m a working woman now. As far as you know, I just sucked and fucked five men and made rent on my shithole apartment.”

Mars growls, a low warning coming through the mic. All of the guys are silently laughing. “You better watch your next words, Sunshine. Don’t talk about sucking or fucking anyone else but me.”

“Okay, let’s get this party started, shall we? Go ahead, Sunnie. Start walking from the café,” I interrupt their married bickering.

“You got it,” Sunnie says.

“And look sad. Can you cry on command?” Hope asks and I nudge her side. “What? She needs to look devastated that she’s doing this. This isn’t a walk in the park for women when they decide adoption is their best answer. It hurts them.”

She insisted on coming and would not let me leave until I agreed. I’m worried for her, too, but I know the safest place she can be right now is by my side.

If I can’t protect her, well… I’ll just have to join her.

“Okay, so imagine someone taking the babies,” Utah suggests, and Sunnie gasps.

Mars curses. “I’m going to fucking kill you for even saying that.”

Little whimpers and cries come through the mic, and I toss my head back and pinch my eyes shut as the guilt eats away at me. Sunnie is a sobbing mess now, rubbing her stomach and whispering how much she loves her babies.

Hope sniffles too. I feel like such a bad guy for allowing this to happen. We watch as she disappears into the adoption center and then everyone falls silent as we wait for the interaction between her and Mr. Zachary.

The reflection of a truck down the street grabs my attention and I know it is Mars slipping into place so he can get Sunnie out of here.

“Hi, I’m looking for Mr. Zachary,” Sunnie chokes out through broken sobs.

“Aw, dear. That’s me. Are you Sunnie?”

She doesn’t say anything, but I’m assuming she nods.

“Come to my office and let’s talk and get some information on why you think adoption is best for you,” Mr. Zachary says.

“Anyone else not like the sound of this guy’s voice?” Utah whispers to make sure Sunnie can’t hear the question and the rest of us nod.

He does sound suspicious. He has a slow, yet higher-pitched tone when he talks. His voice is too smooth.

“Do you need any water?” he asks Sunnie.

“No, thank you,” she replies.

“Good girl,” Mars whispers in a silent celebration.

Never take anything from a man who wants to kill you, or he will kill you sooner.

That was Reaper’s advice.

“Very well, let’s get started. According to the paperwork you filled out before you came here, you live just down the street in one of the apartments?”

The apartment is a safehouse the club keeps for when others need to lie low.

“Yes. It’s just me. I’m a prostitute, but I can’t take care of three kids. I thought I could, but I can’t,” she begins to cry again. “And I just want them to be safe.”

Mars makes a sound that distorts the feed.

“Of course you do. You’ve come to the right place. We have so many families looking for cute little babies. And three? They won’t have an issue finding their place in the world.”

“Really? You think you can help?”

“Absolutely. I actually have someone in mind. Would you like to meet her?”

“Um, I’d rather a husband and wife adopt. I don’t know how I feel about one person, Mr. Zachary,” Sunnie explains, feeling protective of her children.

“Damn, she’s good. I might make her a part of the force. She has great undercover skills,” Utah says with naïve hope.

Mars will never allow that to happen.

“Oh, she’s so capable. She’s a doctor,” Mr. Zachary states. “Who better than to trust your children with if not her?”

“I suppose you’re right,” Sunnie replies, sighing.

“She’s actually here now. She just met with someone, but they weren’t the right fit,” Mr. Zachary stands by the sound of the chair rolling in the background.

“Probably because they weren’t sex workers,” Hope remembers to speak quietly.

“When are we going?” Mars questions as times ticks by. “Come on. She’s about to meet her.”

“Let’s wait until we hear voices,” I say, knowing I just pissed off Mars some more.

“Hi,” a feminine voice comes over the mic and I’m taken back to years that I have long forgotten. “I’m Haley.”

“Okay, go, go, go,” Utah urges. “One, you at the ready?”

“Just tell me when to pull the trigger and they will become blood on the sidewalk.” The gun cocks as Tongue and Mars run into the adoption center.

It’s silent on the mic until a flurry of sound hits all at once. Someone’s mic screams in feedback, sending a high frequency that pierces our ears. We all shout and toss the earpieces to the floor and Hope is rubbing the side of her head trying to get the ringing to stop.

A second later, Tongue is out first, and he has Mr. Zachary slung over his shoulder. He wipes his knife on his jeans and that’s when I notice blood coming from Zachary’s mouth. Haley is knocked unconscious, I think. Mars is carrying her and Sunnie is right behind him, following him to the truck.

“You know, that went smoothly.” Utah jerks the truck in drive. Tongue sits in the bed of the truck with Porter and their new friend.

“The hard part hasn’t even started yet.” I stare out the window and completely blank on my way home. I don’t want to torture Haley, even after all that she’s done. I know a few people in this car would frown upon that, but we don’t kill women.

Except for that one time Mars killed a woman in rehab because she had kidnapped Sunnie to use her and other patients as sex slaves. She deserved to die. But we never torture a woman. Haley has done things that would deserve it, but I don’t have the heart.

Just a quick snap of the neck or a bullet to the head. We want to make sure any killing is done in private, not in the middle of the street unless things get out of control.

“You know, I can still arrest her.” Utah’s eyes meet mine in the rearview.

“No, that’s not how we handle things in the club.”

“Badge, no one is going to blame you. Prison will be bad for her.”

“She’s sick in the head, Utah. She’s fucking ill, and honestly, nothing but death will bring her peace.”

Hope takes my hand, sliding her fingers through mine and I sigh as she somehow takes the stress from me and gives me relief.

She holds more power over me than she will ever know.

“Seer was right again.” I think back to the conversation I had with Seer last night. Crazy sight-seeing mother fucker.

No one says anything. What can be said? Seer has visions and they are always right. I wish like hell they weren’t. Maybe we wouldn’t have to deal with so much pain in this club if they weren’t.

“We’re here.” Hope kisses my cheek and hops out of the truck. I follow behind her and Utah grabs my arm before I can go any further.

“I can’t be here.”

“I know,” I say to him.

“I can’t see anyone die or I’ll have to arrest you, and I don’t feel like doing that considering I’m already an accessory to murder.”

“Is it murder or vengeance? Those women, Utah, those kids…”

“Murder is murder. Doesn’t matter how pretty of a picture you try to paint with it to justify what you’re about to do.”

“I’ll paint the best fucking picture there is, if it means what I’m about to do becomes easier.” I tug my arm free from his hold and leave Utah behind. “Thanks for the help, Utah. You can go. I promise I won’t call you for any more favors.” I go into the clubhouse the back way and slip inside, taking a minute as my hands shake and a roll of nausea hits me.

God, I can’t kill Haley. We might not have worked, but I loved her. We were just kids. We didn’t know how to handle the responsibility and the weight of death. I wasn’t mature enough to know Haley needed help and guidance. I failed her as a husband.

But I won’t fail her now.

There is havoc inside the house, and I follow it right down the stairs to the basement where all the blood and revenge lives. Tongue heads inside the playroom to tie Mr. Zachary down, but Mars doesn’t know what to do with Haley.

“Sit her on the table and let’s strap her down,” I say, strolling over to Doc as he pushes the incubator into his office where Jay will be safe. “Doc, is there a way for you to stop her heart, effectively killing her? Something like lethal injection?”

“Yeah, I can. She won’t feel a thing.”

“Okay,” I nod, wondering if I’m doing the right thing. Should I inflict pain on her with everything she has done? We do it with all the other people we capture, but this one is different. Doc prepares what I asked for and I sit down in the chair next to Haley’s bed. I think about other options.

Like what if we put her in a mental facility? Maybe she’d like it there. She can get the help she needs, but she won’t be able to live in society again.

She’s strapped down and there’s a huge red mark on the side of her head where Mars knocked her out. Haley still has the same hair. Long and blonde. It was one of my favorite things about her, but not now. She’s aged badly. She doesn’t look like she’s in her forties like me but pushing sixty with all the wrinkles on her face.

Wrinkles aren’t bad. They hold stories and laughs. The lines are actual physical evidence of the journey of life. But I don’t think Haley’s hold good stories.

She begins to rock her head back and forth as she wakes up and on habit or instinct, I take her hand in mine. I lift my eyes to see Hope staring at us, but I reach for her too. “I love you,” I remind her. “I’m in love with you.”

“Forrest?” Haley begins to wake up and one eye is clear as day while the other is cloudy. When did she become blind? The years have not been kind to her. A big, bright smile takes over her face and my heart breaks inside. “Forrest, I found you.”

“You found me,” I tell her sweetly, my eyes watering as I prepare to say goodbye. “Did you need to find me for something?”

She nods and her throat bobs as she swallows. “I’m on a mission,” she says excitedly. “I have to make the world right. I was such a bad mom. I have to stop other women from making the same mistake. Do it with me. We can do it in Amber’s name. You remember Amber, right?”

Hope sniffles and turns around to give us privacy.

“I could never forget our daughter,” I say, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “But I cannot go on that journey with you. It isn’t right. Those women didn’t deserve to die.”

“They didn’t love their babies. They were going to give them up. It wasn’t right. We would have never. They were bad mothers!” Haley begins to become hysterical, tugging and pulling on the restraints. She lets out an ear-piercing roar. “They were bad. Like me. They were bad. They have to be stopped. I need to fulfill my mission.”

“Look at me, Haley. Look at me.” I grab her face in my hands and she stops fighting, a warm smile full of love and remembrance directed at me.

“I’ve looked for you for so long. I love you, Forrest. We can do anything together. We can make the world a better place by getting rid of those women and we can finally have a family of our own.”

“No, Haley. No, we can’t. It isn’t right. We aren’t meant to be together. It’s been a long time. Do you remember?”

“A long time?” she asks, confused. “How long?”

“Over twenty years,” I whisper, and her eyes widen.

“Twenty years…” she mumbles, and a moment of lucidity takes over. “Forrest?”

“I’m here, Haley.”

“I can’t fight them,” she begins to sob. “They are telling me to do things. I’ve done horrible things. Kill me, if you ever loved me, kill me. I can’t live like this. Please,” she begs. “I’m so sorry about Amber. I’m sorry. I just—”

“—You just what?” A tear rolls down my cheek, but that second was all I got before the lucidity is gone.

“—I need to make the world a better place,” she singsongs once more, tugging on the ties again. “I’m going to kill them all. No woman will ever give up her baby again. It isn’t right. It isn’t right!” she cackles.

Doc comes up to my side and hands me three syringes. “This will put her to sleep, paralyze her, and this one stops her heart. Like lethal injection,” he informs me, and I nod, taking the medications in my hand.

“Kill me,” she sobs again. “Forrest, please!” Haley begs when her mind breaks free. “I can’t fight them. There are so many. The babies, those women. Kill me,” she wails. Her biceps press against the restraints, flexing and showing how skinny she is. How unwell she is.

“I’m going to set you free, Haley. And you’ll be with Amber again.”

“Yeah?” she asks with hope. “I’ll get to see our baby?”

I wipe my cheek on my shoulder and place the first needle in her arm. “Yeah, tell her hello for me and how much I love her.”

“I will. I’m so—Let me go! Let me go!” Haley begins to thrash, and she lifts her head as she tries to bite me, her teeth clanking together. Her body begins to slow as the anesthetic begins to take hold. I place the second needle in next, a paralytic as Doc described it, then toss the empty syringe on the floor.

Haley is still now, but I’m shaking. Years of memories and first times nearly break me as they run through my mind. I take her hand and kiss her knuckles. “You’ll be okay. I’m sorry too. I’m so sorry.” I insert the needle into her arm and inject the medication that will stop her heart.

The syringe falls to the floor. To me, it’s loud, echoing off the headache pounding in my skull.

Hope wraps her arms around me, and I sink into her embrace, hoping she can hold the majority of my weight.

Doc checks for a pulse and looks at me sadly. “She’s gone, Badge.”

And she finally looks at peace.

She’s never looked like that. Not even when we were married.

Sometimes to prove your love, you have to let go. And that doesn’t mean you have to be in love.

And in order for me to move on with Hope, I had to show Haley one last show of kindness, a sliver of love.

I hope she’s with Amber, because that is what is oddly making me feel at peace right now.

Our little girl is no longer alone.