Dangerous Conceit by Ali Lee

Chapter 21

Rafa woke up feeling groggy to the sound of a silent house. He could not believe it was already ten at night and Angelo had not called to check in. Not that he minded not being disturbed, but it did shock him.

Rafa glanced around and noticed the television turned on but muted. He leaned forward and clicked it off, rolling his fingers through his hair before forcing himself off the sofa. The small stove light shined from the kitchen but he found himself alone.

He followed another light source to the second floor and observed Maura's door partially closed. After looking in and finding her sound, he walked in his bedroom to see Lexi leaning against the headboard with a pillow behind her back and her knees lifted in front. She was scrolling through her phone, intent on whatever it was she saw.

“Hey,” his voice sounded deeper than usual, not quite ready to be awake.

“Hey,” she replied in passing.

“I can't believe I slept for that long. Why didn’t you wake me up?”

“You said you were tired, so we stayed quiet and wanted to let you sleep. I left you dinner in the refrigerator if you're hungry.”

Lexi barely glanced his way, prompting Rafa to discover exactly what captured her attention on the phone.

“Wedding dresses?” he said surprised and scooted next to her. Maybe she actually looked forward to the upcoming marriage.

Lexi shrugged and pushed up her finger, scrolling through the assortment of styles. “You said we would have to get married soon.”

Rafa pressed a picture to enlarge and showed it to her. “What do you think about that dress?” He pointed to a flowing, pearly-white dress with little sequence and lengthy sleeves. “You would look pretty in that.”

She stared at the wedding gown, mentally picturing what she would look like wearing it and wondering if she would dazzle him in it. “It's beautiful.” She smiled and Rafa clicked the phone off.

“We’ll get you whatever dress you like.”

Lexi took a breath and looked at the blackened screen. “So when is this supposed to happen?” She clicked the phone back on and began surfing through the web again.

After watching her skim through child's gowns, Rafa exhaled, taking the phone from her grasp before she further entertained the idea of marrying him. Lexi stared at her empty hands and then looked at him, immediately sensing his somber state of mind.

“You snatched that from me too quickly. Don’t you want to go through with this, or did you change your mind about running for governor?”

“Neither.” Rafa started aimlessly scrolling through the dresses himself. “I don't want you going into a marriage completely ignorant of what I've been since we were last together. And I don't want you hearing it from somebody else.”

Lexi let out a breathy sigh. Her body fell limp as she folded her fingers on her lap. “I suppose you should get it off your conscience then,” she mumbled but did not care to hear what he needed to say.

“It's fair that I tell you the truth. If I don't, they will blindside you.”

“Who are they?”

“God, I failed as your boyfriend,” Rafa voiced his frustration. “I should have protected you. If I had any sense back then at all, I would have followed you home one of those nights or searched for you when you never came back. I saw the bruises, but I believed you, Lexi. You told me you got into fights. I never questioned the marks on your body until that last night. Then I thought you didn't come back because I went off on you.”

“Look, I get it. It's okay.”

Rafa stared expressionless at the white wall in the farthest side of the room, shaking his head. “After I left Homestead, my mind was shit. I was lost. Then I joined Angelo and had money thrown at me. When you take a man who thinks he was wronged and give him money…that’s a dangerous combination. I married my work—didn’t care about anyone or anything.”

Lexi interrupted, “and it was me who you thought wronged you? Am I right?” Rafa looked away, unable to look her in the eyes. “I take that as a yes.” Lexi moved the hair from her face and pushed one side behind her ear. “Go on.”

“I was selfish. I know it. I didn't care whose feelings I hurt, as long as I got what I wanted in the end. Women would come onto me and I’d make them think they had me; then I’d be gone.”

Lexi scooted her feet to the edge of the bed and stood, staring down at him and asking him pointedly about his confession. “Why do I need to know this, Rafa? Are you trying to break my heart? All this time, I waited for you and you tell me about the women you've been with?”

At her words, Rafa stood in front of her and grabbed her hands, attempting to put it all in perspective for her. “Sweetheart, I’m part of the mafia. I kill people. You either know everything about me or nothing about me. You will know everything. I won’t keep you in the dark about what I do, about what I’ve done. I won’t live a secret life from my wife. I'm telling you this because I trust you to understand…not to like it, but to try to understand, to accept me. I don't want to marry you if you can't stand me. I couldn't live like that.”

Lexi slid her fingers from his grip and stepped back, muttering while letting her arms dangle to her side. “I dreamed I would find you. That’s how I made it through that alive. But picturing you with someone else…” Lexi rubbed her eyes. “Don't get me wrong. I never fooled myself into thinking you wouldn't be with someone, but that doesn't make it any easier.”

Lexi wanted to escape his steady gaze and pushed past the strong body standing between her and a shower, hoping to wash off her insecurities with the nearly scalding water. As she rinsed her hair, she considered all the words he confessed and wondered if he was as different as she originally thought. He had been kind and protective over her since seeing her again. She decided he was actually lost within his own misery between then and now. She could not see him dismissing other people’s feelings, not as he said—at least, not to any who mattered. Rafa said the truth regardless of her reaction. That alone gave her no choice but to stick with him. It would be her and him no matter what.

Once she finished, Lexi twisted to look at her back in the mirror. The marks started to fade, looking much better than the first night it happened. She felt little pain but probably because of the two pain pills she took an hour earlier. Either way, she waited for him much too long and intended to make him hers, erasing all thoughts of other women from his mind. She would be the only woman he remembered.

When Lexi exited, she looked around but Rafa no longer waited in the room. She only missed him for seconds when he walked through the door and shut it behind. He held a bottle of vodka in one hand with two shot glasses in the other. He handed Lexi a shot glass and filled it, turning to fill the other for himself.

“To the future?” He raised his eyes and questioned, holding out his glass. She clinked and barely glanced at the content's color before swallowing and moving the empty glass toward him. Rafa filled it a second time, watching her duplicate her previous action when she held it to him again.

He cleared his throat and set the bottle on the nightstand, taking the glass from her hand. “I think you’d better wait a minute before you have another.”

Then he downed his own, staring at the towel she held at her neck. The covering hid most of her feminine features except her delicate neckline and long legs. Rafa did not realize he also had gained her lustful eyes. Lexi stared at him. She focused on the toned muscles from behind his fully unbuttoned dress shirt that flashed his bare skin down to his belt.

Rafa exhaled and poured himself another shot. “So how are your injuries healing?” he asked without considering the real meaning behind his question or how she would interpret it.

“I took two of your pain pills earlier.”

“Two? Then you drank two double shots. I'm going to have to cut you off.”

“So,” she started to say and moved several steps closer, “about what you said earlier…”

“Yes?” He set his shot glass down and leaned against the wall, folding his arms.

“If I marry you, am I going to be your last?” Lexi pressed her lips together, preparing for his response.

“My last?” He eyed her, watching her breaths cease as she waited for his answer. “As in…are you going to be the last woman I ever fuck?” Lexi's mouth parted slightly. Rafa never did mince words. “Come here, Alexis.” He crooked his forefinger at himself, making her hand clasp the towel tighter as she stepped closer. When she was but a few feet away, he grabbed her free hand and pulled her against his body.

“Do you see whose house you're in?” He circled his hand in the air. “Our daughter is sleeping in that room in there, her room, Lexi. Do you honestly think I would bring you to this house if I planned to fuck around on you?”

Rafa's fowl mouth temporarily caught her off guard. She looked directly in his eyes, skimming his bare skin with her fingertips, cinching his shirt with her nails. “Then show me how serious you are about me.”

Rafa inhaled an extreme amount of air at the earnest blue eyes gazing at him. “Believe me, I would love to show you, but I don't want to hurt you.” He placed his palm over her hand, hinting it would not take much to convince him. Lexi noticed. She loosened her grip on the towel's two ends around her neck, letting it fall to the floor and placing her other hand against his chest.

“I'm more worried about my battered heart, not my back. So show me, Rafa.” she demanded.

Seeing her expectant eyes, his eyes eagerly explored the exposed body before him. Rafa took in every delicate curve, from her subtle hairline to her swollen breasts to her full pink lips. His mind instantly remembered all of her sensitive spots, as he squatted to the floor before her, gliding his nails against the soft skin of her legs as he raised his body with slow agony, inhaling her scent as he stood.

“Are you sure you're okay?”

It did not matter to Lexi if she was okay or not. She wanted him. She pushed her fingers beneath his shirt and slid the ends to his shoulders, letting it slide from his arms to the floor. “Don’t make me wait anymore for you, Rafa,” she begged.

Rafa could resist no more of her touch and gripped the back of her neck, pulling her hot skin to his body as he whispered in her ear. “Let me know if you’re hurting in any way, understand?”

Lexi said nothing. She simply watched him lay two pillows in the middle of the bed. His slacks seemed tighter than they were moments ago. She knew he wanted her too by the restricted bulge behind his zipper.

Rafa guided her backwards with gentle ease to the bed. Her skin felt hot—sensual. She was beautiful in his arms, underneath his body that would take her for his own. He captured her lips; at first gently but he eventually seized them from every angle in an attempt to satisfy his need. The kiss intensified his craving. It heightened his desire to have her, to taste every inch of her skin.

His mouth shifted lower, leaving blushing blossoms below the nape of her neck; then he moved to the contours of her shoulders. He enjoyed seeing the chills rise against her skin. He also loved the scarlet blotches he left behind and continued his ravenous kisses until he reached the darkened buds of her breasts.

His mouth lingered on one, while his hand squeezed the other. Lexi felt as though her heart and pulse were beating two completely different rhythms. Her chest easily lifted to his level—feeling, desiring and wanting more of what he could give. At this angle, his hand easily slid underneath her waist, below the injuries on her back. He lifted her, sinking his mouth below her naval and then to her very sensitive core.

“Rafa,” she screeched at the contact as he aroused her, glancing up and watching her writhe under his touch. Her soft, whiny moans begged him and pleaded for so much more that he instantly aimed to please. His tongue lightly caressed her delicate folds; his fingers invaded with skillful intrusion, until all at once, he felt her insides tighten and her limbs shudder. He loved seeing her like this. He wanted to see her lose control to him over and over. God, the things he would do to her if she were completely well.

Lexi panted with uncontrollable breaths when Rafa lifted himself off, unbuckling and removing his pants. With her eyes sealed shut, she heard a drawer open and close and then the click of the lamp light off. After some seconds, he finished with the slick covering and laid the pillows against the head of the bed, setting his back against the padded cover.

“I want you on top of me—now,” he ordered and reached for her arm, helping her to her knees.

Lexi crawled to his pelvis, breathing rapidly to the point where she thought she might faint. She could hardly conceive the incredible length entering her body, filling her and reaching her limit. Rafa did not move. He basked in the feel of her and let her become acquainted with him again. When he was sure that she was comfortable, he whispered in her ear.

“Don't let go of my neck. I still don't want to hurt you.”

Rafa’s body moved with deliberate strides. His thrusts were slow yet constant against her, allowing them both the incredible sensations that sex would bring. His steady movements made her gasp in his ear, each and every time he would withdraw to drive back inside. Rafa wanted her complete surrender to him.

“Christ, Alexis. You make my cock throb. You don't even know how good it feels to fuck you again.” The vulgarity of his words caused her to force herself on him hard, crying out as she felt every inch. He could not have her hurt and shook his head; his one hand tightened in her hair and the other on the outer part of her thigh. “Watch it, love. Let me take care of you this time.”

He guided her body against his hips, until Lexi could no longer contain her cries. She tried to muffle her sounds. She bit her lip to keep from being heard; but the more she tried to stay quiet, the more pleasure he rendered between her legs. She pleaded with him and nearly choked him while he continued to pull her down. The intense friction provoked her climax without warning. The incredible sensation utterly consumed her body. Lexi felt as though the ecstatic waves were draining every ounce of her strength.

Rafa was not through with her. He yanked her against his body with a satisfying speed, determined that she would feel his love. All Lexi would remember was the way he made her feel when he indulged her—she needed to remember nothing more than him.

In no hurry to move, they stayed wrapped in the other as Rafa admired the soft pink blemishes he left on her skin. He pulled her closer to his chest, compelling her to gaze at him—the man who held her so tightly without wanting to let go.

“I will make up for all that shit you went through, Alexis. I won't stop until every one of those bastards die, I promise.” Lexi noticed his pained expression and circled her arms around his shoulders when Rafa made his feelings for her known. “I love you, baby. Always have.”

Her body shivered at the words he never said before now; then Rafa fell straight to sleep before Lexi could make any reply to him at all.