Made Marian, Volume One by Lucy Lennox
Tristan
Holy mother of god, that kiss. I tried to hide my reaction to Blue, but inside I was a lump of quivering jelly. Taking that man’s mouth with mine was the single most sensual experience of my life.
It wasn’t the soft, dainty kiss of a woman, demure and unsure, and… polite. It was strength and prickly scruff and naked, lusty want.
And fuck, did I want. I wanted him so much it took my breath away. Had we been in a private space instead of the bar of a winery I owned, I would have pounced on him like a cat on a ball of string. I wanted to unravel him.
Blue felt amazing under my hands, and he somehow tasted of indulgence. Sliding my tongue into his hot mouth felt like sliding a key into the door of a home I’d been looking for my whole life. The feelings that came over me should have scared me to death, but for some reason they calmed me.
Once I felt that calm come over me, I ended the kiss and pulled away. Even though I was still trembling on the inside, it was a good feeling. Like the nervous fluttering of anticipation instead of shaky fear. I wanted to kiss him again, and somehow I knew I would find a way back to that mouth.
We were laughing again, which was probably the bubbling of relief that things weren’t awkward after my oral assault.
After ordering a glass of my favorite red wine, Blue told me about the time he had his wisdom teeth removed when he was eighteen years old and was so high on pain meds that he was seeing double.
“I could have sworn I saw my dad kissing a dude in the kitchen. I kept insisting that Mom go in there and stop Dad from being gay. My entire family thought it was the funniest thing ever. They made up a story about Dad’s special friend Kevin. That it was okay when Kevin and Daddy shared secret kisses. Then as we got older, the stories got wilder. Mom admitted she and Dad had three-ways with Kevin. And every once in a while they’ll put on an exaggerated voice and whine, ‘Blue, stop being gay like Dad,’ as if it’s the most original joke in the fucking world.” Blue rolled his eyes. “My family is crazy, by the way. In case you couldn’t tell because I’m so normal.”
Then it was my turn to laugh, which just made him laugh harder and swallow beer down the wrong pipe until I had to smack him on the back.
“Tristan, thanks for the laughs, man. I truly can’t thank you enough. I really needed this tonight,” Blue said. His smile was thanks enough.
I squeezed his shoulder again to assure him it was my pleasure, and I took another sip of wine with my hand still resting on his shoulder. A voice came from behind us. Turning around on my stool, I saw two men had approached us.
“Blue?” the older man asked. I didn’t know Blue’s ex yet, but I already hated him. Obviously.
The man looked from Blue to me.
“Hi, Jeremy,” Blue said in a neutral voice.
Our stools had swiveled around toward each other and I took the opportunity to lean a little closer to Blue, settling my hand lightly on his knee. I felt his body tense for a brief moment before relaxing. Our jean-clad knees brushed together and I pressed mine against his.
Jeremy leaned toward Blue and hugged him awkwardly. I felt my body tense and my jaw clench. What the hell? He was just going to manhandle my fucking boyfriend right in front of me? Jesus, Tristan. Get a grip. This stranger isn’t your boyfriend. But still. Rude.
When Jeremy stood back, I reached my arm over and placed my hand on Blue’s upper back. I just… I don’t know. I guess I didn’t want him to feel alone. The guy needed to know someone had his back.
Blue’s body seemed to relax again at my touch, and I felt relieved he wasn’t mad at me for touching him. Jeremy introduced his little sidekick to Blue.
“Blue, this is Brad. Brad, this is Blue.”
Brad reached out a hand to shake Blue’s. “Nice to meet you. Blue, was it? Like the color? How do you know Jeremy?”
The question was said with honest curiosity and politeness, but I winced anyway. Clearly, Jeremy hadn’t told his husband about a previous three-year relationship he’d gotten out of only six months before. That didn’t even make sense. How could that be?
Blue sat there, stunned into silence. I began speaking to cover the awkward moment. “Blue is short for Bartholomew. He and Jeremy were together for three years until just a few months ago.”
There was venom in my words. I felt its sour taste as the words came out of my mouth. Brad’s eyes widened as he looked in astonishment to Jeremy. For a split second, I regretted getting involved. But then I felt Blue lean the slightest bit closer to me and noticed he was shaking. It was so subtle I almost missed it. My thumb idly traced circles into the spot below his nape in an effort to calm him.
“I’m Tristan,” I volunteered, reaching out my hand to shake. Brad took it first and shook, even as my words about Jeremy and Blue were still sinking in. Then it was Jeremy’s turn and he shook my hand with a little too much muscle. I met its strength with my own.
After shaking his hand, I put my arm back around Blue, and Jeremy’s eyes couldn’t help but watch every move I made. When his eyes flashed over to mine, I grinned a knowing grin. That’s right, buddy. He’s with me.
Jeremy looked back to Blue. “So, I heard you’re being promoted and moving overseas.”
“It hasn’t been announced publicly yet, but I guess the editor was impressed with my willingness to speak truth to power,” Blue said with a pointed look at Jeremy.
Jeremy looked away, nostrils flaring.
Brad seemed to get his thoughts together and decided it was time for him to have a private conversation with his husband.
“Will you excuse us, please? Jeremy and I need to get back to our table,” Brad said, pulling Jeremy’s hand. I wondered idly if he had the legendary red-headed temper. “Nice to meet you both.”
Blue and I swiveled our stools back around to face the bar. We sipped our wine in silence for a few minutes and then Blue did something completely unexpected.
He turned and leaned into me, burying his face in my neck. I brought my arms around him immediately and held him tight.
“It’s okay. I promise,” I whispered into his ear. “You’re going to be all right. One more week and you’ll get your fresh start.” I rubbed his back in slow strokes and rested my face against the top of his head. God, how I wished it could be different for him. If only he’d gone straight to his room instead of coming to the bar. But then I wouldn’t have met him. I wasn’t sure if I was selfless enough to wish for that.
