Always Us by Lizzie Morton
Six
Abby
“Holy shit, that was amazing!” squeals Zoe. She comes towards me, pulling me into a hug as I make my way into the VIP tent backstage. Her and Sophie had scheduled their flights later, but luckily made it in time for the guys’ first big set.
“They were so good,” agrees Sophie with a smile. “I’m so proud of them.”
The VIP area is buzzing because it’s the place where the afterparty begins after each band finishes their performance. It’s a large tent, full of people milling around. There’s everyone from stage crew to musicians, including some press. Sooz and I have worked our fair share of celeb studded events, but never quite to this level and it’s intimidating to see some big names casually walking around. Most of the time the people we work with have little significance to my life, but the people I see now are who I grew up listening to, idolizing. I can’t begin to imagine how the band feel, surrounded by the people who have inspired them, and are now considered to be on a par with. It must be surreal.
Sooz wanders over, looking like the weight of the world has been lifted off her shoulders. Despite the circumstances everything ran smoothly. We pulled it off and there is no doubt in my mind that it was largely down to her crisis management. She really is good at what she does.
“We did it!” she screeches, doing a little dance on the spot. “Now, where’s the alcohol?”
“That’s my girl. Nice to see you’re human after all,” says Zoe, looking ecstatic that Sooz is finally up for drinking. She’s usually so focused on work it doesn’t happen, however, today is a cause for celebration.
“Some of us know how to control ourselves and what our limits are,” retorts Sooz.
Zoe rolls her eyes. “Chill out. I wasn’t trying to insult you. It’s just nice to see you letting your hair down, that’s all.”
Still not one hundred percent convinced, Sooz lets out a huff. She reminds me of myself, when I first returned to Brooklyn and was so consumed by work that I rarely came up for air. I like to think I have a better work life balance these days, that or I’ve formed a close friendship with alcohol that is just about acceptable. Either way, I agree with Zoe. Sooz could do with letting her hair down a bit more often, which between us all, we’ll make sure she does tonight.
“What’s the plan now then? And more to the point, have you seen Jake?” asks Sophie loudly. I signal with bulging eyes that I’m not impressed at the volume she’s speaking with.
Speaking equally as loud, Zoe joins in. “Of course she hasn’t seen him. Do you think she’d be standing looking so relaxed if she had?”
A rough, familiar voice startles us all from behind.
“Are you trying to say it wouldn’t be a happy occasion to see me?”
Sophie and Zoe visibly pale, realizing they’ve made this more awkward than it needs to be. Meanwhile, the blood in my veins runs ice cold. I’m struggling to figure out, how between the four of us, nobody noticed him approaching.
There are two options. I can run away, or I can pull on my big girl panties, turn around and pretend like I’m happy to see him and that the history between us is just that, history. I’m favoring the former but the sensible part of me decides I need to turn around and at least acknowledge his presence.
I will myself to move, but my body is like lead and my feet remain in place. Zoe, Sophie and Sooz stand awkwardly, looking between the expression on my face and Jake. They all look bewildered and for once, Sophie and Zoe have been stunned into silence. Typically, they couldn’t have done that a few minutes earlier.
When I do manage to turn, it’s painfully slow. I look at the ground, trying to avoid looking at Jake until the very last minute. He clears his throat impatiently, making it obvious he’s as happy to see me as I am him.
My eyes move up from his converse covered feet, trailing over his body. His shirt is drenched with sweat from playing on stage and clings to his chest and arms. It’s torture taking in each muscular part of him, muscles I spent one heavenly night getting to know intimately, after six years of waiting. A night that no matter how hard I try, I can’t forget. But one night was never going to be enough to settle my need for him. I could spend a lifetime of nights with Jake and never have my fill.
He clears his throat again. I must have been staring longer than is socially acceptable and the blood rushes to my cheeks at being caught out. The smirk on his face shows he knows exactly what I’m thinking and feeling. That’s the thing about me and Jake, we know each other too well. We know each other’s tells better than we know our own. The soft smiles I’d grown accustomed to back in Brooklyn, have been replaced with a cold mask, proving I’m in for anything but an easy ride this summer.
“Finished staring?” he asks.
I want to respond quickly, show that I’m unfazedby him, but my brain comes up blank when I try to think of something to say. Anything has to be better than standing in silence gawping, but when I open my mouth to speak, I stammer and close it again. I’m doing a fantastic goldfish impression, although a goldfish might show more intellect.
Jake looks puzzled at my behavior. “Has Abby West finally been silenced?”
My eyes burn. I try again to think of a smart response to put him in his place. I come up with nothing. This is utterly humiliating. Every part of me that dreaded this meeting was one hundred percent justified even though everyone told me otherwise. It’s going worse than I could have ever imagined.
“Jake why are you over here anyway?” interrupts Sooz, coming to my rescue. She pushes forward and stands in front of me protectively. Her tone is firm yet professional, letting him know she means business without crossing any boundaries that would jeopardize our work for the company. “You should be getting changed and ready to do interviews with the press, then meet and greet with the fans. I know these sorts of festivals might still be new to you, so if you need me to, I can take you through each tour date’s schedule and explain what everything means. Some of the terminology can be hard to get your head around.”
She places her hands on her hips, a sassy smile on her lips, knowing she’s put him in his place. Meanwhile I’m standing, hating that my friend has had to come to my rescue. Zoe snorts down laughter, biting the inside of her cheek while Sophie looks around the tent awkwardly.
Jake narrows his eyes and I notice he has a slight flush to his own cheeks after being reprimanded by Sooz. He knows he’s been caught out and doesn’t have a leg to stand on. Rather than taking the bait, he simply replies, “Not necessary. I understand the schedule.”
“Then off you go. We know how you hate being late and the band has become known for being on time. It would be a shame to ruin it now…” Sooz shoos him away, following closely behind.
As they leave the tent, she looks back over her shoulder winking at us. I swear I can visibly see steam coming out of Jake’s ears he’s that mad. But it would be foolish to think the worst is over, we’ve been cut short and it’s obvious he has a lot more to say.
“Well, that went well,” says Sophie, wrapping her arm around my shoulders. “Come on, I hear the bar here is amazing, and even better, it’s free.”
But it doesn’t matter how many drinks I have. Nothing could get rid of the sick feeling in my stomach. I’ve just witnessed firsthand that this summer is going to be anything but easy and this is only just the beginning.
***
Jake
When we’re a safe distance away from the other girls, I turn and snap at Abby’s friend and work colleague Sooz. “Who the hell do you think you are?”
“I don’t have a clue what you’re talking about,” she replies with a soft, sweet, South African accent.
If I was any other guy, I’d be pussy whipped as she’s fucking gorgeous and that accent seals the deal, but I only have eyes for one person.
I frown, letting her know she’s not getting away with it that easy. “Yes, you do. Abby can speak for herself you know. At least I thought she could, although it appears that she might have lost the ability in the past couple of years.”
Sooz folds her arms across her chest, making it clear she’s not going to back down and let me speak crap about her friend. I’ve got every respect for her standing her ground. Our professional relationship confuses things, but she’s refusing to let that interfere with doing what’s right. I was an asshole back there, and I’m glad Abby has found someone who’s got her back, although it doesn’t make my life any easier having another female bitching at me and pulling me up on my shit.
“It’s funny … Abby told me what a nice guy you were, but fame seems to be going to your head. So far all I’ve seen is you acting like a prick.”
She’s pushing the boundary hard, testing to see if I’ll bite back. I take a couple of deep breaths and try to show her I’m a good guy, despite the performance she just witnessed. A gentle reminder of the hierarchy here wouldn’t go amiss though.
“Maybe you shouldn’t speak to me like that? Technically, I could have you fired,” I say.
“… But you won’t because our issue is personal, so, ‘technically’, you don’t have a leg to stand on. If you didn’t want any drama this summer, it might have been an idea not to personally request Abby be recruited onto your PR team.” She smiles and takes a breath, no way near finished putting me in my place. “I did my own investigating. I’m not an idiot and knew it couldn’t be a coincidence that out of the blue, we were being requested just a couple of weeks before the tour. These things are organized months in advance. I know you’re the one responsible for all this, but don’t worry, I’ll play nice if you do. This summer could do big things for her career and I’ll be damned if I watch you ruin things for her, or yourself for that matter.”
Her career. The reason why I didn’t chase her down when she left Brooklyn. It’s not just my ass that’s on the line this summer.
“Don’t tell her.” I might be ready to fight for us, finally, but it’s going to be on my terms.
Sooz shakes her head. “She’s not an idiot, Jake. She’s going to figure it out eventually.”
“I know she’s not, but I’m tired of other people getting involved in our business, all it’s ever done is make things harder between us. Let me be the one to tell her, she needs to hear it from me. Please.”
I practically beg the last part and soften my expression, so she doesn’t feel the need to be so on guard. It works. Her stance becomes less defensive. I’m not sure which side to her I preferred, because now she’s looking at me like she feels sorry for me and I don’t need her sympathy.
“You still love her, don’t you?”
“It’s not like it matters, she doesn’t give a damn.”
“You would know that how? My understanding was that you haven’t spoken in two years.”
I shrug. “She was the one who moved to the other side of the world.”
“And did you chase after her? From what I heard you didn’t put up much of a fight.”
I rub a hand over my face and let out a sigh. “It’s more complicated than that. You don’t know the full story.”
“I know I don’t, but neither does Abby. If you love someone, you have to put everything on the line for them. If you really believe they’re The One, it’s worth taking that risk. Let me tell you, Abby is worth every risk and every mountain you’d have to climb. If the purpose of this summer is to win her back, then you’ve got some serious work to do to earn her trust back.”
“I get it.” I don’t need to say anything else. We give each other a look of understanding. For now, we’re on the same wavelength and if I play my cards right, Sooz could be my accomplice in this.
She nods and heads to where the rest of the band are standing, making sure they’re organized and ready to head to where they are supposed to. I need to get myself together and follow them but take a few moments to reflect and process seeing Abby again.
What did I expect to come from this summer, from forcing us together like this? Was my original plan to try and win her back? No. My first thoughts were that I wanted to mess with her head the way she had mine, the way she still is doing after two years. Who am I kidding? The way she has done since we were seventeen.
I don’t know what I’m doing, we’ve only seen each other for a few minutes and I’m already questioning everything. Do I want her back? I’ve no idea. What I do know, this is a time when my mind should be consumed by the band and the career I’ve worked hard for, and it isn’t. Instead, it’s consumed by all things related to Abby goddamn West.
Sooz was right earlier, this is both our reputations on the line. After everything we’ve worked for, I can’t let our history get in the way, I’m the one that put us all in this awkward situation, now I need to man up and deal with it.
