Always Us by Lizzie Morton
Seven
Abby
Last night was a doozy. We could have stayed at the festival and enjoyed the music, but after my first meeting with Jake went epically wrong, all I wanted to do was get away from there, rather than risking two rounds in one night.
I try not to feel guilty that I haven’t seen the other guys yet, but once they catch wind of what went down, I know they’ll understand. It’s been two years since I’ve seen them. I should have put on a brave face and acted professional like I told myself I would, but rather than seeing them, I ran in the other direction. All because of Jake.
A groan comes from Zoe. “My eyes hurt. Why’s it so bright?”
The hangover from last night is going strong for all of us.
“At least you didn’t vomit this time,” says Sophie, taking a sip of coffee. Out of all of us, surprisingly, she’s the one looking the freshest. I don’t doubt that the memory of her Berlin hangover is still ripe in her mind and may have influenced her choices to be more sensible last night.
“Maybe I’d feel better if I had,” replies Zoe. She rubs her stomach at the same time she pushes the breakfast pastry around her plate.
“You’ll feel better if you eat that rather than playing with it,” says Sooz.
“I’m too scared.”
“Here’s an idea. Why don’t you stop being so melodramatic and just not drink as much?” I don’t mean for it to come out sounding as bitchy as it does, but unfortunately, thanks to my raging hangover, my brain doesn’t connect with my mouth like it should.
My comment riles her up and she’s clearly in no mood for my crap. “Like you’re one to talk.”
“I had an excuse—”
“There’s only so long that’s gonna fly,” she interrupts and she’s right.
I can’t spend the whole summer being a bitch after every meeting I have with Jake, or it’s going to be painful for everyone. There would also be a strong chance I’d be returning to Cape Town without many friends if I did.
“I’m sorry. Seeing Jake again has affected me more than I thought it would,” I admit.
“You don’t need to explain. Your goldfish impression was rather impressive.”
I sit, a little shell shocked. Even after how I spoke to her, it’s a low blow.
Sooz attempts to intervene. “That was a bit harsh Zoe.”
“No, she’s right.” I nod, letting her know it’s ok, and thankful that once again she’s attempted to come to my rescue. “Last night was so embarrassing. It was like being back in high school again. I literally lost all ability to speak.”
“I guess things have changed a bit between the two of you,” agrees Sophie. “You have seen him naked though. I think I’d lose the ability to speak if I bumped into a guy a couple of years later, who I’d seen naked and broken up with the next day.”
“That’s because you don’t get much practice,” snipes Zoe.
“Keep your hungover opinions to yourself. I’d much rather have less experience than be known as the Brooklyn bike,” Sophie snaps back.
Her response shocks us all. It’s out of character, but sex can be a sore subject with her. She’s timid compared to the rest of us when it comes to guys, claiming she would rather spend the night with someone she can see herself in a relationship with, over scratching an itch like Zoe.
“How about, we stop bitching at each other because we all feel rotten and do a bit of sightseeing? It seems a shame to let being in a new place go to waste,” volunteers Sooz, trying to calm the tempers that are rising.
“Sounds like a great idea,” I say, but I would agree to a lot of things if they asked.
I’d do pretty much anything to avoid talking about Jake again.
***
“I need a Bratwurst, stat.” My stomach growls loudly in agreement.
“What’s a Bratwurst?” asks Sophie.
Zoe smirks. “A giant sausage … Of course, she wants a giant sausage. How long’s it been Abby?”
I roll my eyes. “Can we go at least an hour without relating something back to sex?”
“A big sausage sounds delicious,” says Sophie innocently.
We all look at each other and burst out laughing.
“Where on earth are we? I feel like I’m in Chitty Chitty Bang Bang,” says Zoe.
I look over at her and shake my head, knowing her comment isn’t meant in appreciation of the beautiful architecture surrounding us. We’re in the old town area of Nuremberg, surrounded by traditional half-timbered German buildings which are incredible and not what I expected of our first tour date destination. If we visit more beautiful places like this then we’re going to have a great summer. Well, all of us apart from Zoe, who couldn’t care less as long as there’s alcohol and hot guys.
“Surprisingly, you’re not far off the mark,” mumbles Sooz with her head stuck in a guidebook. “It was actually filmed in Bavaria.”
“Yawn, that’s my history lesson over with.” Zoe spaces out and walks ahead, then shouts over her shoulder, “So where do we get us some giant sausage?”
“According to the guide, there’s somewhere close that also does great steins. They’re giant beers.” Sooz directs the last part at Zoe before she gets a chance to complain once again that she doesn’t understand any German.
“Now we’re talking,” says Zoe and pulls Sooz ahead eagerly.
Two hours later and our hangovers are long gone after we’ve managed to peel ourselves from one bar to the next. Heavily drinking two days in a row, we’re setting the mark high for the rest of the tour. Luckily, we don’t have too much work to do with the band besides their performance dates to begin. There’s the odd photoshoot here and there, and some other small PR events, but so far, it’s all proving to be pretty relaxed. If it weren’t for having to deal with Jake drama, I’d be yelling for everyone to hear that I love my life.
We stumble our way into what we all agree will be our last beer stop. It’s a small, intimate bar on the outskirts of the old town area and not too far from the hotel where we’re staying. It’s perfect for our last drink. At least it was until we notice the band sat at a table, including Jake.
“Oh no,” groans Sophie, coming to an abrupt stop at the front, causing us all to crash into her like dominoes. It causes a scene and any chance we might have had to back away, out of the bar without the guys seeing us disappears. We’ve been noticed and now we have to face the consequences.
“I’ll be damned, she isn’t an enigma after all,” says Sam loudly. He has a smile on his face, but I can tell by his tone he’s annoyed I haven’t sought him out yet. That and neglecting to give him any form of communication in the two years since I left Brooklyn, no big deal. “Too good even for our big famous band, are we?”
My feet feel like they’re stuck in concrete, but Zoe pushes me forward, whispering into my ear, “Just go with it. The worst thing you can do is run away.”
I know she’s right, even though my stomach is churning. No matter what, I cannot walk away from the guys this time. They’re not just any old band we’re working with, they’re some of my oldest friends and I need to prove to them, that after all this time, it still means something.
Sophie and Zoe make their way to the bar to order us drinks, greeting the band properly on their way past. Sooz is more professional, opting for the ‘fake it till you make it’ approach. It could also be a bit of Dutch courage, especially after her run in with Jake yesterday. For the sake of the company, it’s a relief one of us is managing to keep our head screwed on.
I follow slowly behind Sooz, approaching Sam who is standing with the other band member I don’t know very well called Ryan.
“Long time, no see!” I say with a sheepish smile.
“That’s one way of putting it,” mutters Sam. He furrows his brow and stands to his full height in an attempt to be intimidating. We lock eyes and I wait for him to unleash his wrath on me, but then he breaks the awkwardness when he bursts out laughing. “Just kidding, Abby bear.” He carries on howling with laughter and engulfs me in a bear hug, so tight I can feel the vibrations of his laughter running through his body.
It’s comforting being in his arms, and reminds me of the safety net he became when I returned to Brooklyn. I try to subtly breathe in his warmth and familiar scent, at the same time, trying not to make the hug overly friendly. I need to keep in the forefront of my mind that for Sam, there may be unresolved romantic feelings between us. This summer is becoming like The Matrix, similar story lines in different realities. If only I knew what the ending was then maybe things would be easier.
Zoe clears her throat. “Here’s your drink.” She leans forward, passing me a giant beer stein as she says under her breath, “I think you’ll be needing this. Jake’s watching and he doesn’t look happy.”
Glancing over in his direction, I decide it’s time to make a choice. I can either become a shadow of my former self in his presence, erasing every ounce of what I worked so hard to be over the years, or I can remember who the hell I am and not let a guy bring me down.
Deciding on the latter I plaster on a smile, turn to Jake and say, “Is there a problem?”
“Here we go,” groans Zach from beside Sam. He signals for the bartender to bring a round of shots, knowing how this is about to go down.
“There’s no problem. I’m just watching you fall back into old bad habits,” replies Jake.
“I’m gonna try not to be insulted that you lumped me into the bad habit category,” says Sam, through a clenched jaw.
“Not you. I’m talking about Abby latching on to anyone she can. There’s a name for that you know—”
“Which wouldn’t be very professional …” interrupts Sooz.
They glance between themselves and for once, Jake backs down. Whatever it wasSooz said to him when they disappeared yesterday worked.
“I’m out of here. The night’s taken a turn for the worse.” He doesn’t wait for a response before leaving the bar.
“I’ll go with him,” says Zach. He offers me a sympathetic smile and then gives his drink, which remains on the bar untouched, a longing look. “Don’t want him getting into any trouble.”
“Nice to see you guys are still being friendly,” jokes Sam. “Is this how the rest of the summer is gonna go?”
I shrug and say, “I’m trying, Sam, but he’s not exactly making it easy. He’s worse than ever.”
“Do you blame him? You left him hanging and literally ran out of the country. You haven’t been in touch for two years … with any of us.”
“This isn’t the time or place for this conversation,” says Sophie. “Why don’t we try a proper reunion when we haven’t all been drinking?”
“And when did you grow balls?” asks Sam snappily.
This night is spiraling massively out of control for everyone involved. It’s not quite the bonding we all had in mind for our first group meeting.
Sophie squares up to him and replies, “Watch the attitude, Sam. It’s not me you’re pissed off with, but I’ll happily give you a reason for it to be.”
Sam stands, blinking. Fleetingly, his expression changes, like he’s seeing Sophie in a different light. He shakes whatever it was off and takes a long drink.
“This night was an epic fail,” says Zoe, pointing out the obvious. “I vote we head back to the hotel. We’ve got a long day tomorrow.”
We all nod in agreement, as we really do have a long day, moving on to the next tour destination, Barcelona. The girls pack up their stuff and wave goodbye to the guys before walking to the exit.
I hold back, in a last effort to win Sam over. “I really am sorry.”
“I know you are, Abs. But I don’t know if that’s enough.”
