Tormented Royal by Lily Wildhart

Chapter Twenty-Six

It’s been two weeks since the arrest, and life is somewhat back to normal.

Well, my version of normal anyway. After all of the bullshit with the guys and the media, I decided to put my head down and refocus my life. I’ve caught up on everything for school and managed to get ahead in most of my classes where I can.

I’ve become a model student and an upstanding citizen. I’ve also managed to avoid all four of the guys who have made my world tilt on its axis over the past couple of months.

I don’t know what to think or feel when I’m around them anymore, so I’ve decided that avoidance is the key to keeping sanity firmly in place.

I grab my keys and phone from the counter and make my way to the garage. Thank fuck this week’s nearly over. Tomorrow is my dad’s birthday, and to say I’m dreading it is an understatement.

Smithy ended up not coming back when we thought because his sister took a turn for the worse again. I can’t be angry that he’s looking after her when she’s suffering so much, but I'm kind of sad that I’m going to be on my own for an unknown amount of time. Even if Mrs. Potts is looking after the basics. It’s just not the same.

I shake my petulant pity party off and climb into the car. The dread I’d started to feel when heading to the unhallowed halls of ECP doesn’t exist anymore. Even Blair has left me the fuck alone lately. I don’t know what East did or said to my family when he got them to drop the charges, but I even got an apology note from my aunt about the ‘misunderstanding.’ It’s been a very surreal few weeks.

I pull into what I’ve come to see as ‘my spot’ next to where Indi’s already parked in the Wrangler. I grin up at her when she bounces around to my car door, two coffees in hand. I double check my hair in the mirror before climbing out of the car and taking the coffee she thrusts in my direction. “You, sweet cheeks, are a goddess.”

“I know,” she says with a weird little curtsy that makes us both laugh. We link arms and head into the school. I give Maverick a little finger wave as I pass by him, basically scaring the snot out of a freshman. He grins at me, and I shake my head as he drops the kid, who runs off the first chance he gets. “How are things going with the guys?”

I look at Indi, who has the audacity to look sweet and innocent, like she didn’t just imply some sordid shit. “We’ve come to a mutual agreement of avoidance, I think.”

“So no more public fuckery then?” She laughs, wagging her eyebrows, and I feel a blush coloring my cheeks.

“No, nothing like that. I told you, I’m not here for anything like that. I don’t have time or the want for a guy in my life. Let alone multiples.”

She pouts as she leans up against the locker beside me. “Spoilsport. How are we meant to do double dates if you won’t date?”

“You think any of them would do a double date?” I bark out a laugh, and she shrugs. “Even if I was to date someone, it wouldn’t be any of them. They’ve been so hot and cold that I have no idea where I stand with any of them anyway.”

She rolls her eyes at me, and I sigh like we haven’t had this conversation a few times over already. “I’m telling you, all four of them are chasing your kitty cat. They would all definitely do terrible things for a peek at the meow. Just sayin’.”

I close my eyes, trying not to laugh at her absurdity. Who the fuck says shit like that? “Indi, it is a good thing I love you. Anyway, you don’t need the comfort of double dates, right? I thought things were okay with you and Jackson.”

She shrugs and clutches her books closer to her chest. I can’t help but frown, apparently I’ve missed something. I’ve been so wrapped up in my own shit that I haven’t noticed what’s been going on with her. “Things have started fizzling out after the camping trip.”

“Please tell me you didn’t put out and now he’s ghosting you. If you tell me that, I’ll murder him. I’ll have a straight up murder party and dance on his grave.”

“I wasn’t really ready to take that step with him; but he seemed so into it, I didn’t know how to say anything since we were out in the middle of nowhere just the two of us.” She shrugs, looking down at the floor, and I see red. That fucking asshole. I’m going to rip his dick off and then see how he feels. A tear slips down her cheek, and she wipes it away quickly. “I’m sure it’s not that. Maybe I wasn’t any good and that’s why.”

Her voice is so small, and I hate him for doing this to her, and I hate myself for not noticing something was off with her. I pull her into my arms and hug her tightly. “I’m going to kill him.”

I let her go and look up and down the halls, searching for the jacked-up jock. And here I was thinking he was a half decent guy. I’ll gut the motherfucker.

All of the weird emotions I’ve felt about my own shit, mixed with the looming sadness of tomorrow, are pushed into my well of rage toward Jackson.

Finley walks toward us, and his eyes go wide when he sees me. I’m seething, and I can’t control how hard I’m shaking. “Who pissed in your Wheaties?”

“Uhm…” Indi starts to talk, but I spot the jock in question. She reaches for my arm, but I shake her off.

“You!” I hiss, moving toward the asshat that broke my friend’s heart.

Finley doesn’t even ask questions. He hauls Jackson up against the lockers, lifting him from his feet by his throat.

“What did you do?” he hisses, and Jackson coughs and splutters where he holds him.

The football player claws at Finley’s hand, and Indi taps on my shoulder. “Please don’t hurt him. Not here.”

I look at Finley and nod. He drops Jackson, who crumples to the floor in a pile. Finley crouches down and talks to him so quietly that I almost miss the words that spill from his lips. “We are not done here, Jones. I’ll be waiting.”

He stands and nods at me before heading down the hall toward his class like nothing just happened. I turn to Indi, who’s watching Jackson as he catches his breath. I move closer and press my foot against his balls, applying pressure before I lean forward to talk to him myself. “If I hear that you’ve done something like this before, you can expect to lose these.” I push a little harder, and he squeaks like a pathetic fucking loser.

I lift my foot and turn to Indi, linking her arm in mine before dragging her down the hall.

“Thank you. No one has ever stood up for me like that before.”

I give her a side hug, squeezing her as tightly as I can. “Ride or die, bitch. There isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for you.”

She gives me a watery smile, and I want to turn around and step on Jackson’s balls so hard they actually pop. I’ll deal with him later. For now, my friend needs me, and that’s all I’m going to focus on.

* * *

I wake up bleary-eyed from having cried myself to sleep last night. The room is shrouded in darkness, and I’m glad. Nothing about today makes it a happy or light day.

It’s my dad’s birthday.

The first since he died.

And I feel fucking hollow.

I wish I could say I cried myself out last night, but every time I woke up throughout the night, the tears started again. I look down at my phone and see that it’s already ten in the morning.

I guess I’m skipping school. Honestly? Fuck everything today.

I keep my eyes open long enough to shoot off a message to Indi to let her know I won’t be in and to not panic before putting my phone on silent and laying it face down.

The whole world can suck it today.

I curl up into a ball, trying to stop from feeling like my heart’s bleeding out of my chest. Memories assault me of how we spent his birthday last year. We were half a world away from here, in London, doing all of the stupid things that made Dad happy. Like visiting the Queen’s Guard and making fun of their unwavering stature. Wondering how many cake places we could hit up before someone was sick. Doing all the cheesy touristy stuff like riding the London Eye and visiting Big Ben.

And now… Now he’s gone, and we’ll never do any of that again.

I remember complaining about all the stupid stuff last year, taking for granted that it was just another birthday because we’d have plenty more of them together.

Sobs rack my body as the memories flood my mind, and there isn’t anything I can do to stop them.

I miss him so fucking much.

I startle when the balcony door opens, and Lincoln walks in, his school shirt partially open. “What are you doing here?”

He kicks off his shoes and drops his blazer onto my dresser before climbing into my bed. “I remembered what day today is, and I didn’t want you to be alone. You weren’t at school, so here I am.”

I try to wipe my face as he pulls me closer, until I’m lying on his chest. “Remember that one time, when we thought it would be fun to try to make a treehouse. Your dad ended up helping, but managed to nail-gun his shirt to the wall?”

I’m somewhere in the middle of laughing and crying at the visual. That day was so much fun. It was my eighth birthday, and the guys and I thought it would be a great idea if we could build the treehouse we’d been talking about for weeks. My dad was very much not a handy guy, but he loved me and wanted to help.

I sob on Lincoln’s chest, and he strokes my hair, not saying a word about my tears staining his shirt or the fact that I’ve barely spoken to him in weeks.

He’s here for me, exactly when I need him. Just like he was when we were kids. “Thank you,” I murmur to him when my tears finally subside enough that I can form words.

He rests his chin on top of my head as he runs his hand up and down my spine. “You don’t need to thank me, Octavia.”

It occurs to me that he’s the only one of them that hasn’t called me ‘V’ since I returned. Not that I wanted them to call me the nickname, but it’s like he’s always known that we’ll never be what we once were. Something about that realization hurts me more than it should, especially since he’s right here, looking after me the way he did when my mom left.

Maybe it has something to do with me.

All my life, I thought it was everyone else, but maybe there’s something wrong with me. My mom left. My dad killed himself. Even these four… They didn’t want me around once I came back, so they left me in a roundabout sort of way too.

I let out a shuddery breath and pull away from Lincoln, refusing to get too caught up in the comfort of his embrace. I won’t survive it if I get attached and he leaves me too.

I have to remember that.

People always leave.

* * *

“We should do something tonight,” Indi says as we finish changing after Gym. “We haven’t done anything in weeks, and it’s Halloween. I freaking love Halloween.”

I cannot believe it’s Halloween already. This used to be my favorite holiday, but this year isn’t the same. With that in mind, I realize that I desperately need to reclaim some joy. I’ve burrowed myself away, doing nothing but studying and starting my plans for the recording studio.

I’ve also written more songs than I have in my entire life.

It’s been a weird few weeks.

I finish buttoning up my shirt and slide my blazer on before looking back at her. “Did you have anything in mind?”

She smiles up at me, her eyes full of hope. I haven’t been able to say no to her since the whole Jackson thing. The sniveling little asshole hasn’t said a word to her since that day either. I fucking hate cowards like that. “There’s the house of horrors on the other side of town?”

I groan as I grab my bag and slide my feet into my Chucks. “Fine, fine. We can do it.”

“Yes!” she exclaims, jumping to her feet. “At least we don’t have to wear costumes, right?”

“I’ll take the win.”

She does a little jig on the spot, making me laugh. “You should because I was going to make us be Pippy Longstocking twins.”

I laugh even harder at her as she grins. We head out of the school, ignoring everyone we pass, arm in arm, to where the cars are parked. “I’ll pick you up at eight?”

I nod as I head to the driver’s side of my car. “Sounds perfect. I’ll dress comfortably.”

“Whoop! I’ll see you in a bit.” She bounces into her car, and I shake my head as I get my shit sorted out before starting the engine.

I feel eyes on me, so I look up and see the three boys who haven’t been that far from me since my dad’s birthday all watching me. They’re kings surveying their kingdom, yet I’m their only focus. It’s almost a heady feeling.

I shake it off because their attention isn’t what I need right now. Or maybe even ever. I might have forgiven them for being assholes and taken refuge in each of them at one point or another since I returned to Echoes Cove, but we’re not anything more than people who used to be friends.

I put the car in reverse and pull out of my spot, the weight of their gazes burning into me.

Sometimes I wish we’d never left here. I can’t help but wonder how different life would be if I hadn’t left with my dad all those years ago. But I can’t really wish that I didn’t have that time with Dad.

I drive home, unable to think about anything but the four boys who’ve had me twisted up in knots since I returned to Echoes Cove. One way or another, everything always seems to lead back to them.

I pull the car into the garage, spotting another delivery of yellow tulips on the steps.

I can’t help but frown. No one should be able to get this close to the house without me letting them in unless they’re coming in via the Saints’ property. I’m pretty positive the flowers aren’t from Lincoln or East, and it’s starting to feel a little creepy. Especially after how they both reacted to the cards that come along with them. So I leave the flowers where they are, spotting the plain white envelope and decide to head inside to get ready for tonight’s house of horrors.

Fall is officially here, so I dig out a pair of jeans and the hoodie East wrapped me in the day he rescued me before grabbing a quick shower. He’s definitely not getting the hoodie back, like, ever

It doesn’t take me long to get ready, and I reheat some of the shrimp linguine Mrs. Potts prepared while I flick through the series I keep meaning to start on Netflix. I have way too many TV subscriptions for the amount of TV I don’t watch, but fuck it.

I flick through the videos on the ‘for me’ page on my latest addiction of an app, glad that despite the shit I’ve dealt with, very few people even know about the account I have on here. The pictures of the football team preparing for their game make me scowl. What a fucking let down those guys ended up being. Indi has bounced back from the Jackson thing pretty well, but it’s impossible to miss how she freezes up when he’s near us at school.

I know she hasn’t been to any games since their camping trip too, which fucking sucks because she loves football.

Boys are so stupid. Who even needs them?

My phone buzzes in my hand, and I pull up the message thread.

Indi: On my way

I put my dishes away in the dishwasher and pull my hair up into a messy bun. Screw hot girl summer, this is comfy girl fall.

I lock everywhere up and head down to the gate to wait for her, finding another bunch of tulips leaning against the railing.

This is getting to be a little much now, so I pull up my phone and snap a picture. I shoot a message to someone I totally didn’t envision messaging anytime soon.

Me: Is this you? Because two bunches in one day is a lot *laughing emoji* also, if it’s not you, can you check your security to see if someone’s using your place to access mine because one set was left against my front door.

Lincoln: Wasn’t me. I’ll look into it

I check the post box while I’m waiting for Indi to arrive and flick through the junk mail. I find a manila envelope stashed in here. It has my name on it but no address, so it was hand delivered.

Weird.

I open it and the contents fall out.

There are so many photos of me in here. Photos of me with the guys, with Indi—all of their faces scratched out.

I think I’m going to be sick.

Then I see the note.

One day we’ll be together. You won’t have to be alone anymore. You won’t have to run to them when you’re sad.

One day isn’t too far away.

This can not be happening.